Special thanks to Isis Hotep and Tsubasa no Yami for giving me info and getting me off my lazy oshiri to write more.  I'm terribly sorry it took so long; I've been under a LOT of stress from real life.

Also, sorry, Tsubasa no Yami, I honestly don't know of any other Hao/Tamao fans.

~~~~~~~

            "THEY WHAT??!"

            Everyone in the room winced except for Hao and the Ren, both of whom stood as cold and stiff as stone, rage blazing in their eyes.  A circle around Hao with a radius of several meters was burned into the elaborate Oriental carpet at their feet, but nobody seemed to notice at the moment.

            "You heard me," snapped Hao through gritted teeth.  "They changed my name to Zeke."

            Everyone present felt a sickened feeling gnawing through their stomachs at hearing the name again.  No one even thought of laughing at it.

            Ren scowled and began pacing furiously, his hands in tight fists so that the knuckles turned a pallid white.  "I cannot accept this.  I cannot tolerate it!  While there was no love lost between you and me, Hao, your brother was a respectable ally, and you were an honorably challenging opponent.  To have random Americans tamper with such a personal part as your name and abuse you through such dishonorable tactics is beyond comprehension!  I want to see you brought down in a fair battle, not laid low by scum with no integrity!"

            "For once we agree," said Hao with a furious satisfaction.

            A terrible silence fell over the room, accompanied by a feeling of absolute doom.  None had seen Hao this angry since the end of the shaman fights when Yoh's friends had refused both to fall and stay properly dead and to accept Hao's invincibility.  For something to cause such a stir for the elder Asakura twin was certainly something of catastrophic potential. 

            It was for this reason that the youth who had survived the shaman fights had set aside their differences and desires to kill each other and come together for a meeting.  All had agreed to a temporary truce…even Hao.

            "What was Ren saying?" whispered Horohoro nervously.

            "He doesn't approve of the name changing," answered Tamao.  "He thinks it's dishonorable."

            "I'll say!" exclaimed Horohoro indignantly.  Words failed him suddenly, aside from several choice words he would not say in his younger sister's presence, so, with a glance at Pilika, he settled back into his seat with a scowl.

            "And that they should have targeted me, the Tao Ren, from the very beginning," he spat, his anger getting the better of him.  "Len is bad enough, but to have it degraded to the level of L…L…" He paused, his spike lengthening dangerously as his face reddened.  "Le…"

            A pause.

            "Le…"

            "Lenny," finished Hao coldly.

            Everyone but the two in the middle of the room cringed involuntarily as the Basontou whipped out of nowhere and several innocent chunks of ceiling were cruelly removed from their places and cut into dust.

            Tamao stood up sharply, her eyes studying the carpet.  "I…I'm going to go get some water.  Does anyone else want some?"

            "I'll help you," volunteered Pilika quickly, looking as if she too dearly wished to leave the room. 

            "Bring some for me," put in Hao, momentarily distracted, his eyes losing some of their fury as he glanced at Tamao.

            "Me too, I guess," added Horohoro.  "And one for Ren.  He looks like he needs to cool off.  Aw, just bring for everyone if Pilika's gonna help."

            She nodded and quickly left as Ren flopped down on the nearest couch, the deadly light in his eyes still not fading.  Hao too sat, brooding from his perch on an ornately carved Chinese chair. 

            "How is it," began Faust softly, his position passive as he leaned back ever so slightly in his wheelchair, "that you did not manage to destroy the dubbers?  Tamao told us that you two had gone to prevent the furthering of their evil, but it seems to have had no effect."

            Hao flinched at the mention of one of his few failures, but looked up with unclouded eyes.  "I had completely underestimated them.  I judged their ignorance and failed to take into account the massive forces defending them.  What this 'licensing' is, I am not sure, but it is a powerful shield.  It is as if some deity higher than anything we have yet conceived guards them and allows them to toy with us."

            "Are you saying it's hopeless, then?" asked Jun, her hands clasped in worry.  "After what they did to my poor brother, I couldn't bear it if there was nothing to be done."

            "For once, I see nothing that can be done," admitted Ren.  "That's why we decided to call a truce and a gathering.  We remembered how our combining powers with Yoh helped to defeat Hao once –" a slightly affronted cough from said Hao, which Ren ignored "— and we had hoped that it might work similarly in this catastrophe."

            There was a pause as everyone pondered the possibility.

            In the moment of silence, the door opened with the faintest creak and Tamao and Pilika entered, bearing glasses of water on—

            Horohoro took everyone by surprise, suddenly bolting up with a terrible expression on his face.  In an instant, he had smashed both carrying devices with an ice attack and a cry in the native Ainu language.

            Yoh, who had supposedly been dozing in his chair, leapt up and deftly caught each and every glass as it tumbled through the air – except for the one last one, which Hao plucked out of free fall and took a sip from, looking very superior.  He even dared to send what could almost have been a coy glance at Tamao, who blushed as pink as her hair and busied herself trying to clean up some of the water on the floor.

            "What was that for??" demanded Ren, glaring at Horohoro, who had sunk to the floor with comical tears streaming down his face.

            "Why me…?" was the only reply he managed from the blue-haired youth.

            Everyone blinked in puzzlement except for Yoh, who began to laugh in his carefree, death-defying way.  "Tray!  He got upset when Tamao-chan and Pilika-chan brought in trays!!"

            Horohoro paused in his lamentations to glare at Yoh.  "It's not funny that they call me—"

            "Trey," finished Hao.  "Just as I find no amusement in being called Zeke, whether it means 'the power of God' or not.  For your information, my power is my own.  So stop looking as if it's so funny, Yo—"

            "Yoh!"

            Everyone froze at the voice as it cut through the air like a whip crack.  Yoh's grin disappeared rapidly as he turned to his fiancée, water glasses still in his hands.  "Yes, Anna?"

            She was holding a stopwatch in one hand (where it had come from, no one had seen) and was frowning at it.  "Too slow.  It took you 2.83 seconds to catch the glasses, not to mention that you missed one and still got water on the floor.  You've been slacking on your training, haven't you?"

            "There aren't even any more shaman fights!" protested Yoh.

            "Haven't you been listening?" she retorted.  "We may have to deal with our doubles—"

            "Dub-les," snickered Chocolove and was promptly poked by the Basontou.

            "—and you certainly can't afford to be slacking now!  Electric chair for three hours!"

            Yoh handed the water glasses to Tamao and Pilika and unhappily obliged as Hao shook his head at his sister-in-law.  "Honestly, Anna, pregnancy hasn't changed you one single bit."

            She did not reply, but simply put one hand on her rounded abdomen with what almost could have been a look of pride.

            "What are you going to name it?" asked Meene quietly.

            "Her name is going to be Hana," stated Anna in a voice no one would dare even question.

            Except Hao.  "That is a lovely name," he agreed, "but, meaning 'flower,' it is apparently a girl's name.  What if it should happen to be a boy?"

            "If it were a boy," replied Anna, "it would be his fault—" a glare at Yoh, who was still suffering over his denki isu "—and we would still name it Hana."

            "Poor kid," muttered Hao, who shut his mouth quickly at a glare from Anna.

            "We seem to be getting off the subject," mused Faust, accepting a glass of water from Pilika. 

            "All righty then," said Hao, snapping back to his usual self.  "We've agreed to try and work together, which is already a huge combination of power.  And several of the hard core fans have expressed a desire to help us out."

            "That's good," said Ryuu with a nod.

            "Unfortunately, they couldn't be present today," added Hao.

            "Why not?" queried Horohoro, who was visibly more collected now that all trays had been removed from the room.

            "For one thing, we're crowded in here as it is," reasoned Hao, "and secondly, quite a few of them are rabid fangirls.  Even the very authoress is absolutely crazy about me."  He paused to preen a moment.  "Of course, I don't see how any girl couldn't be…"

            "I do," said Lyserg sourly.

            "Well," retorted Hao, looking smug, "you're not a girl – oops, I forgot.  You might be in a few weeks!  Ohohohoho…" Everyone paused in an I-honestly-don't-know-him silence as Hao covered his mouth and gave a snicker that could have almost been a giggle. 

            Lyserg scowled, and everyone could sense him gathering furyoku for an attack.  (On an irrelevant side note, what is with them calling it "mana" in Shonen Jump??!  Do they have any idea how corny that sounds?!  _) 

           "Please," intervened Tamao hastily, putting herself in between the would-be combatants, "we've all agreed to a truce, and…"

            Lyserg gave Hao one last glare and sat down again.  "Bloody dubbers…"

            "That's right!" broke in Ren indignantly.  "Why do I have to say such degrading British lines as 'old chap,' but I don't get to say anything even as strong as 'bloody'?!"

            "Tough luck, guv'ner," quipped Chocolove, who was suddenly forced to retreat behind an expensive-looking piece of furniture to avoid being slaughtered quickly, efficiently, and in at least two different ways. 

            Lyserg returned to glaring at Hao, who was chuckling over Chocolove's crack at the unfortunate, abused British nationality.  "Zeke."

            All trace of a smile instantly disappeared from Hao's face as flames sprang up about him and charred another section of the carpet.  Ren muttered something about a cleaning bill, but was ignored. 

            "Please…" began Tamao, standing up again, though she had a sinking feeling she would be ignored.

            "Shut up and sit down, the both of you," snapped Anna to Lyserg and Hao; both boys promptly obeyed.

            "On the brighter side of it all," put in Ryuu, looking at Ren, "your dad is now your uncle.  That's one more removal from him, really."

            "Like that helps me any," sulked Ren.  "At least with my father, I can explain my initial defeat at his hand with filial piety and thus an unconscious reluctance to openly rebel, but it being an uncle makes it just embarrassing." 

            "Why are we worrying about it so much anyway?" broke in Mikihisa, who, to this point, had remained silent.

            All heads turned. 

            "WHY??" stormed Hao, flames disintegrating the chair on which he was sitting.  "WHY?  IT'S BECAUSE THESE –censored- DUBBERS HAVE GONE AND RUINED US!!"

            Mikihisa looked down at himself and then glanced about.  "You all look the same to me."

            There was a silence.

            "Certainly," Mikihisa continued, one hand casually adjusting his mask, "they have created somewhat insulting doppelgangers, but we ourselves seem intact.  I would—" he put in dramatically "—join you in your valiant fight should they have laid hands on any of your wonderful characters—" Jun and Tamao were convinced they could feel his eyes on them from behind his mask "—but, as it seems they actually have not, I shall leave you to abuse your copies at your leisure."

            Another silence.  Horohoro blinked.  "What…?"

            "So you're suggesting we stop getting so worked up about this because it doesn't really affect us originals?" queried Lyserg.

            "And that the copies can end up as no more than target practice for us?" added Ren, liking the idea more.

            Mikihisa had gone back to his newspaper, but the others didn't mind his silence.

            "Besides," sighed Hao, running his fingers through his luxuriant hair, "as long as there are the true fans who know us, we're in no danger.  In fact, they'll probably help us torture the fakes…"

            "I call dibs on killing Hao's other!" said Lyserg suddenly, standing up.

            "If you do turn out to be a girl, I'll set you up with Ren's other: Len," retorted Hao with annoyance.

            "K'SAMAAAA!" roared Ren, pulling out his Basontou yet again and attempting to impale Hao.

            Yoh watched the fight with a mixture of pain and amusement on his face.  Two hours and fifty minutes of electric chair to go…

            Tamao sighed as Ren's Basontou became entangled in Hao's cloak and Horohoro joined the fray over someone's snide remark about "a tray" (who it was, he wasn't sure, but if Ren was fighting, of course he would join the squabble.)  And to think, she had been worried that the whole dub issue would disrupt the normalcy of their lives. 

            If one could truly call it normal.

Owari

AN: As with last chapter, I don't plan on continuing this again any time soon if at all.  But don't give into the Dark Side!  Use the real names Takei-sensei carefully chose (derived from drugs and all, yeah, gotta love it…) and research the original stuff.  It'll totally be worth your while! 

AN2: For those of you wondering about the "later on," Yoh and Anna had a lovely boy…named Hana.