Realization
By Cherished Dreams
Disclaimer: I don't own Cardcaptor Sakura.
Tomoyo's P.O.V.
I had cried and cried two whole days before my best friend's wedding, not only to prevent large swollen bags under my eyes, but also because spending most of my time with the hopelessly in love couple could no longer be withstood. That's how it was to be in love. And to be loved back. The only kinds of love that I had experienced were, Family Love, Friendly Love and Unrequited Love. It pained me to see the two, but it pained me even more because I had an unrequited love, for the both of them. I loved Sakura ever since the first time I met her and found that she was kind. I loved her because no one before her were kind and caring the way she was towards me. And the reason why I truly cared for Eriol was because he understood me better and looked out for me when others did or could not. He was also admittingly charming and cute.
So sitting there in the front row pewter, in the church the day the two were to be married, was challenging and brutally nerve racking. But when I watched my best friend and my recent ex-infatuation walk down the aisle after their hour long wedding ceremony, my mind was reeling with realization. When Eriol passed me, sitting down in the pewter, he winked at me, and I managed to smile back at him. In my mind, I realized that I never really felt as if I was going to die without him by my side, living the rest of my days without him. It also hit me that Sakura was now happy, and didn't need me always there by her side anymore. Eriol had replaced me.
Large hot tears stung my eyes and tore down the wall I had created to keep them from emerging. I must have looked like I was having a silent mental breakdown because Syaoran had spotted the tears, assured other onlookers that I was just crying from the excitement and walked in my direction. Syaoran sat down beside me, cupped my face and used his thumbs to wipe away my tears and caress my skin.
He barely had time to pull his arms away and brace himself for the huge and sudden thrust of my arms around his waist. I hugged him tightly, not wanting him to see my eyes. He had always had a knack of looking into any ones eyes and see what they were feeling deep inside. He pulled me closer to him and I was softly crushed to his well-toned body. He nuzzled his nose into my hair and I felt him sigh it in. I closed my eyes, tiredly and felt my head droop onto his shoulder.
Time passed and I awoke from my slumber to find the church quiet. I opened my once tear filled eyes and found it deserted. I found myself staring up into Syaoran's relaxed face. He smiled at me softly and I found myself absentmindedly smiling back. "Where are we Li-kun?" He gave me a pointed look and I rolled my eyes before correcting my sentence. "Where are we Syaoran-kun?" He seemed pleased at the correction, glanced around and replied, "We are still in the Church your best friend and my wretched family relative were married earlier today." I yawned and picked my heavy head from his soft lap. I frowned missing the warmth, but gasped and turned to Syaoran. "What time is it?" He casually pulled his left arm up and pulled it close to my face. The hands told me that I had been sleeping for four whole hours.
I stood up abruptly and glowered down at Syaoran. "Why didn't you wake me up Syaoran-kun? Argg! I'm supposed to be there for the speeches and taping this whole ordeal!" He chuckled and stood. "Daidouji-chan, Sakura and Eriol knows that you were -- and still are -- tired from the night before!" He paused suddenly looked at me in the eye. "So when Sakura, found you asleep in my arms while you were hugging me, she decided to let you sleep. She made sure I woke you up before the speeches starts…" He looked at his watch, "…in thirty minutes. As for the taping the whole thing, your business partner and mother are taking care of that. We better get going Daidouji-chan." He turned to leave but I tugged on his jacket sleeve and he stopped. "…Thanks for being there Syaoran-kun…" He smiled his rare-sincere-charming smile and slipped his hand in mine and led me to his car.
Syaoran's P.O.V.
I didn't want to leave just yet so but I couldn't have myself to not show up at our friend's reception. It was a silent ride over to the hall. I occasionally glanced over to the young woman next to me. She tried to keep her light lavender dress not so noticeably wrinkly. We came to a stop and found some of the children and adults had spilt to the front of the hall. She sighed and placed her hand on the door handle, to get out when I stopped her. She looked at me bewildered. I could feel some heat return to my face. I turned to look straight ahead and spoke.
"Tomoyo-san, we both know how you feel about Eriol. But now that you've been to his wedding, are you… alright?" I turned to see her facial expression. She sat there with an emotionless face. "I felt like my heart was ripped out when I first found out that they were going to get married. I knew that Sakura-chan and Eriol-kun were dating but I never thought that he would propose." She paused and bowed her head. "I'm still pretty heart broken about it, but I've realized that he wasn't the one for me. That I could live after he had committed himself to another woman. And that I'm happy that Sakura-chan is that woman."
I reached into my pocket and dug out a handkerchief. I wiped away her tears and handed it to her. She smiled jadedly, and hugged me again. I held her close and a moment later she pulled away. I gently squeezed her hand and grinned "Let's do this together then." I had no idea why I said that. But she returned the grin and carelessly nodded and we both got out of my two – seat convertible. I locked it up and held her hand as we entered the hall, to meet the source of our pain.
Tomoyo's P.O.V.
We walked in together, hand in hand but he dropped my hand as soon as Sakura came up to greet us. I managed to smile weakly, assuring her that I was fine. She ushered us to the main table and the toasts and speeches began. I listened to all the things that her family members had come up to say and I even laughed at Touya-san's speech. He had started off on a serious note threatening Eriol to look after her properly, or he would kill him. Guests laughed at this thinking it was a joke but we knew better.
It was soon my turn and I retrieved the slightly crumpled paper from inside my purse. I took the mic and started my babbling. Some tears slid out but I wiped them away with a small smile. I glanced over to Syaoran during my speech and he smiled at me, giving me confidence. The speeches, guest mingling and dances finally ended, and I decided to sit down in a dark corner of the hall. Some guest were leaving and only a few were left including our school buddies. I watched the happy scene in silence.
Syaoran's P.O.V.
I walked into the male restrooms and found that it was empty. My tense shoulders were finally allowed to slouch and I splashed my flushed face at the basin. I looked at the man staring back at me in the mirror, and I didn't feel like myself. What happened to the 'happy-for-the-couple' act? Seeing Sakura with and becoming a Hiiragizawa, was a little hard for me to accept. I mean how many people, back in highschool thought that Sakura and I would be the ones married?
Stupidly, I thought that that was how my life would end up. With Sakura. But as I stood next to Hiiragizawa at the front of the alter, watching Sakura coming down the aisle, it dawned on me that, she was not longer mine. I fell deeply in love with her at the age of ten, when I helped her capture and transform the Sakura Cards. I was even overjoyed when she had responded to my love at the clock tower.
I stared into the mirror asking it why I didn't feel like a Li Clan Leader. I closed my eyes tightly and gripped the basin hard. In my mind, my subconscious replied, 'because your life is not fully complete. Because you haven't found the woman to rule your heart. And that loves you will all of hers.' Tomoyo. Tomoyo. Tomoyo. I shook my head. She'd never accept me. Her heart was with Sakura.
I opened my eyes when I felt another presence in the room. I whipped around and found Hiiragizawa. He looked at me sternly and spoke. "Li-san, I just wanted to thank you, for letting Sakura follow her heart." I glared at him. My mind mocked, 'If I hadn't she would've been miserable and her brother would've killed me.' "Hmph… Better look after her Hiiragizawa or I'll kill you before Touya does." I growled. He nodded but hesitated frowning slightly. My mind reeled. 'Oh crap…' "…I know about your feelings towards Daidouji-san." I knew it. I looked at him sourly, he ignored it and continued. "You are worthy for her love Li-san. All you have to do is go through the pain that she holds within herself." He looked at me, with an emotionless expression. "…She will love you back Li-san." With that last statement, he turned on his heel and left me pondering on his advice.
I breathed deeply bracing myself for what was to come, walking out and back into the hall. My eyes roamed, the large hall. Meiling was across the room, chatting endlessly to Rika, no doubt about her pregnancy. Takeshi was again being strangled by his long time girlfriend, Chiharu, with Naoko watching them looking overly amused. I stopped roaming when my eyes fell on the two beautiful ladies in the corner, holding each other in a warm embrace. Sakura pulled away smiled at Tomoyo and found her husband, steering her to the dance floor, where a slow song began.
Tomoyo sat down in a nearby chair and watched the couple dance. She smiled happily, the first real smile I had seen from her today. I walked towards her and asked her to dance. She looked up at me, and I saw her violet orbs light up. She stood and allowed me to lead her to the floor. She draped her slender arms around my shoulders and I wrapped my arms around her tiny waist. We let the music take over us and soon she had her head on my chest.
Tomoyo's P.O.V.
Syaoran had his arms around me and I felt safe. I leaned, placed my ear to his chest and listened to his steady heart beat. Suddenly I felt as if the weight on shoulders had been taken away. I looked up and found his admiring eyes looking down at me. And then something unimaginable happened. Something I thought would never happen. I realized that, I had woken from a dream, opened my eyes and saw the light.
Syaoran loved me.
I was so mesmerized in his loving dark honey orbs that I barely noted that he had lifted my chin. He drew closer and my eyes fluttered close in anticipation. Soon I felt his soft, warm lips caressing mine oh-so-gently. His mouth soon covered mine. I soon felt like my knees would give up on me, but he sensed this and supported my back. A new sensation grew within me and my heart thumped in my chest erratically. He pulled away, and my eyes opened. He smiled at me and I found myself smiling back.
He had captured my heart.
The couple was oblivious to the people around them. Sakura and Eriol were grinning madly and gave each other high fives. Chiharu, and Rika had stopped to awe the two. Yukito was smiling happily at the scene, while holding back Touya and keeping Kero hidden in his pocket, who were screaming out profanities that the 'gaki' was now going to take Tomoyo, their sweet sister-like girl, away. Yamazaki had his index finger up in the air, and looked ready to tell a lie. Naoko smiled, while Meiling rolled her eyes and called out jokingly "Get a room!" Syaoran looked up at her and his eye twinkled as he smiled wolfishly. Tomoyo laughed as he picked her up and walked towards his car. Sakura and the other girls gasped. Meiling shook her head and called out after them, "Hey! I was only kidding!" Eriol had snaked his arms around Sakura's waist and pulled her into a backwards hug.
Once they were outside , Syaoran put her down. "I wasn't going to pull you in a room, you know." Tomoyo eyed him weirdly. "Then why did you pick me up and carried me out of the hall?" He pondered for a second then grinned and slipped his hand in hers. He pulled her towards the dimly lit garden. He sat down on an isolated bench and he picked her up to sit on his lap. Tomoyo wrapped her arms around his neck once more. "I think I love you…" He smiled and replied, "I don't…" She looked at him surprised and he finished his sentence. "I know I love you." She nuzzled close to him and they watched the sun set.
- owari -
A/N: ahaha… I'm mean aren't I? hehe… Don't worry I already knew that! Well that's it for now… Oh and please don't ask me to make another chapter for this.. I kinda like the short chapter thing. For this one it happened to be a one shot fanfic.