Emerald Eyes

Extended Summary:

Lily Evans does not have even remotely close to a perfect life, but pulls along just fine. She's got her friends, and she's got her enemies, life for her is pretty much well balanced. Then, her enemies become her friends and a best friend is taken away, life is changing fast and drastically. And through all the crying, laughing, Hospital Wing stays and slapping, James Potter, who is 'just a friend', helps her through it all. Then, too late, Lily realizes the one thing in the world she really needs she can't have. Ok, so this is like a Romantic, dramatic fic with a slash of angst and a dash of humor and a kung-fu chop of ACTION. Amen.

Caution: In later chapters there WILL be rape. Not detailed, but it is a major part of the story. Dont say I didn't warn you!

Kay, so here's the deal. I've gone through the beginning chapters two times already trying to fix the crappyness of it, and still, I'm not to pleased with my writing style in the beginning. Too melodramatic, choppy sentences, egh. So I promise you, IT GETS BETTER. Today (5/31/05), I'm going to upload as many re-written chapters as possible and will continue to do so until I see fit. If there's something you'd like me to fix, drop me a review. Thanks and bear with me! The new chapter will come soon.
Chapter One: Fly Away

The moon shown through the triangular window of an attic, lighting up the small and dusty room just enough to see. It was a full moon; a spectacular moon…but still, she hated it. The moon caused pain and pain was something she had plenty of throughout her life, she was well acquainted with it. Because of this, she found it unfair for it to hurt others who did not deserve it.

There was a mattress pressed against a door with a few blankets on the ground. To the right of that there lay a large, flat-topped trunk filled with odd assorted trinkets, among them books, quills, parchment, and robes. A crummy box was filled with a small collection of records, with a record player next to it. Although the collection was very small, it got the job done. An innocent looking broom was leaned against the window, a rather basic thing to have. However, anyone like Lily would immediately ask what make it was (Lily would proudly respond, Shooting Star 2) and then ask eagerly for a test ride. Then, also near the window, was a white metal cage, it's paint chipped from use in a few places, but still serving it's purpose and enclosing a magnificent white owl. The owl was prancing around in its small cage, occasionally pecking at the bars hungrily, letting out small hoots as it rustled around.

You see; Lily Marie Evans is a witch. A witch with magic and dragons and splendid castles reaching up to the clouds. Unknown to half the world, magic does exist, but God forbid those muggles find out. To Lily, magic was not something everyone should know about. It was enough that some people with magic already abused the power; it would be a disaster to have everyone in the world using it. She attended The Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and was going to return from her summer "vacation" next week to begin her seventh and final year at Hogwarts. She turned seventeen over the summer, making her legal age in the wizarding world. For the most part, Hogwarts was the best place on Earth! There were things and people that she loved and trusted there, it was home to her and no one could ever change that. Not even her crappy excuse of a dad. Not even the stuck-up, snobby girls. Not even James Potter.

Where was this Lily Evans? On the mattress, staring out the window, thinking about how much she hated the full moon. Oh, she did loath it tremendously. Her eyes broke away from the glittering orb and fell onto her arms, scarred and red. This was another reason why she hated the full moon, it made her focus on things she rather just not. Normally, she was positive, energetic, outspoken and lively…but it was nights like these that wore her out. Lily didn't like feeling sorry for herself; she hated the feeling of being powerless and feeble. Therefore, she tried to lighten up her mood, "Come on Lily, you're not the only one in this world who suffers. You know, you've got it pretty good." But even she knew that was a lie.

Yet, the sinking feeling still lingered with her, and she was rather sure that no amount of encouraging words would save her from this feeling of being completely and totally alone. What had she ever done to deserve those scars, you ask? Well, apparently, not arriving home on time to cook dinner was enough to earn her battered arms. Her father, who had been drinking far too much, had gone into hysterics and well…I'm sure you can fill in the blanks. He was a very peculiar man in many ways. Lily was never one to stand aside and let people take control of her, yet…her father was the only person she wouldn't resist when he kicked and hit her so hard every nerve in her body screamed. His eyes were the only ones she could look into and cringe in fear.

Deciding it was far too much wallowing for one night, she stood up, wincing as she rose, and opened the attic to the dark blue night sky. A gust of wind bit her tattered face, blowing her fiery hair and chilling her bones. Then, her owl screeched impatiently, making Lily jump and spin around. Then, with a smile, she undid her pet's cage and placed him on her arm.

"Hey, how ya doing Navy?" She whispered to her friend, who hooted in reply.

"Do you want to go outside?" Lily hushed. His head bobbed in reply as Navy waddled down her arm. Then, reaching her hand, the owl spread his wings wide open, revealing a beautiful array of blue feathers, mixing with the pale white to look strangely like fire. Then, with a jump, Navy was off, soaring through the sky, twirling and spinning higher and higher until he was just a discarded speck in the sky.

Suddenly, there was a harsh pounding on the door that made her jump in shock.

"Shit," She whispered to herself and hastily closed the window shut. Seeing as it was all this magic and wizardry that earned her such a low rank in the eyes of her father and therefore sister, Petunia, Lily was sure that if he caught another sight of an owl, wand, or even a simple charm book, her father would go ballistic.

"LILY EVANS! OPEN THIS DOOR IMMEDIATELY!" Her father yelled. Lily could mentally see his red, raging face.

"HOLD ON!" She yelled back. Bad move, she decided after she said it. That was one hell of a beating that was about to come….

She heard her father sigh. "Lily, please, open the door."

Lily stopped in her tracks, wondering whether or not she had heard her father correctly. Was there a hint of politeness in his voice? It shocked Lily to a point where curiosity drew her to open the door. Curiosity killed the cat, she knew, but never, in her seventeen years of living with him, had she heard this soft tone of voice. Maybe something good might happen? She smiled just slightly at the thought, and gathered her strength to move the mattress and trunk away from the door, towards the window, where it was usually.

She patted down her tangled hair and opened her door. The man standing in front of her she was sure was not her father, seeing as his face looked neither angered nor irritated, and there was a trace of a smile on his lips. His hair was not a complete mess and his clothes were fresh and crisp. Her brain didn't know what to think of anything, not more than five minutes ago he was going crazy and now he was standing calmly in front of her.

When horrible things happen, many people tend to wish for the better. Our hope never dies, which can make us very naive at times. This is an example of one of those times. In the calamity and confusion partaking in Lily's mind, she did not know what to think. Possibly, he could be apologizing? It was too much to hope for, she knew, but it was possible…

A bit of hope rose in her chest. However, she knew it was not to be confirmed until she looked into his eyes. It was a bold move; one that required more strength and bravery than others thought it would take to simply look somebody in the eye. As soon as their eyes met, any hope she had quickly died, leaving an empty feeling in her chest. Despite his clean clothes, pleasant face, and the hint of the smile, his eyes were the only part of him that still looked menacing and deadly. Yet his eyes changed everything. They were filled with the same spiteful hate and anger towards Lily that she had known all her life. She mentally kicked herself for expecting more out of this bastard…

Lily studied him quickly. He was a little overweight and very obviously drunk, now that she thought about it. Yes, now it was so very obvious, his shirt was inside out and he was holding something tight against his back. But what? Suddenly, a glint reflected slightly behind him, and Lily knew immediately the deadly weapon that was placed in his hands, a knife. Like Dei-Ja-Vu, she remembered witnessing this scene, yet from a different angle. Last time, her mother had been in her place and a little Lily was the frightened onlooker.

"W-what are you doing?" Lily asked, breathing heavily.

"What do you mean?" He asked, his tone convincing if it weren't for the fact that his plan had already been revealed.

"You know perfectly well what I mean." Lily snapped, taking in a bit of courage. Slowly, she walked backwards; so slowly you couldn't see her shadow move. Her father walked towards her, but taking long, striding steps forward.

"Lily Marie Evans, you have caused me so much trouble these past years." He said calmly, his eyes however bursting into flames.

"I do everything I can for you. I give you food and a place to sleep at night. You would think you could give me some respect at the very least…" His sentence ended in a slow whisper. He carefully drew the knife from his hands.

"Did your know your mother was the same way?" He asked curiously, studying the knife innocently in his hands. Then he smirked, looking up at her frightened face and giving a small laughter. Lily's heart began to pace in her chest, her breath was running far too fast through her lungs, she was afraid she wasn't going to be able to catch it. Then, she spotted her wand that he had taken from her in his pockets, and before she was able to think about it again, snatched it from him and held it out threateningly. He didn't seem to notice, his eyes were still locked on her.

"Don't you dare do anything to me. I could kill you quicker," She spit out a menacing whisper. The sudden burst of courage was a surprise to her, but it probably came from the idea that this night might be her last. Although plenty of times she had cursed her life, cursed humanity and wished she wouldn't have to live with it…now that her life seemed to be so very fragile, the only thing she could think about was it's incredible beauty, and the fact that she might never feel the warm sun kiss her skin again.

"You're not going back to that little school of yours," He chose to ignore her threat, "In fact, you won't step anywhere outside of this room ever again." These threats fed his smile, and it began to grow maliciously, "Not alive at least."

"I can kill you." Lily's voice shook as she repeated the threat.

He laughed, "You don't have the guts to do it."

And they both knew he was right.

"Stupefy!" Lily shouted, her mind not even thinking about it. Hand still clenched around the knife, her father's eyeballs went white and he fell backwards stiffly. He was not dead, just knocked out. And, judging by her lack of concentration, for not very long either.

Ignoring his still body, she opened her trunk, reached in, and pulled out a sweater, which would never keep her warm, but it was better than nothing. This night was cursed, it was colder than any summer night she'd ever experienced.

"Pequanio." Lily shot a spell at her trunks that shrunk them into a small, portable, size. She then did it to her hawk's cage and to her large bag of records. Gingerly putting them into her pockets, she grabbed her broom.

Her chest was aching horribly, it was impossible to even breath in without feeling sick. Although she didn't like healing any wounds by magic, this time proved to be an exception.

"I guess there is a first for everything," she muttered to herself as she said a quick spell under her breath, quickly mending her bones. Lily breathed in a few deep breaths, the first without the pain.

Behind her, her father groaned. Lily spun around and found him regaining his conscience.

"Shit!" Lily cursed. Wasting no time at all, she unlatched her window, pushed it upwards, and crawled outside. The roof had a few loose tiles, and Lily found herself trying to regain her balance. In front of her, small and perfect town houses gazed at her tauntingly. It all looked like a beautiful painting, perfect right down to the trimmed lawns and flowers. Her life was the part that had smudged, the part where you couldn't tell what it was. Lily leaned back against the window as she mounted her broom. Her father was now on his two feet, approaching closer and closer until he was just about half a foot away. Knowing it was now or never, she quickly kicked off the roof and lurched forwards with incredibly speed.

But she wasn't quick enough.

Mr. Evans grabbed at her leg desperately, a drunken grin stumbling onto his expression when he saw that he had successfully trapped her. The freak squirmed and kicked, increasing his annoyance steadily, if that was possible. How dare she do this to him, he was the man of the house, her father, she should obey his every command! Why couldn't he have two respectful daughters, instead of one? No matter, soon he would only have a good daughter left.

With his left hand he reached for his back pocket and pulled out the knife, lifting it into place. Very gracefully he ran the knife downwards, like a bird dropping from the sky. He could feel the knife puncture her skin, and what did he do? He smiled slick smile, a smile that was filled with the joys of hating.

At just about the same time, she had seen him reach for the treacherous knife. With the small amount of energy Lily had flowing in her body, she pulled away. That was the very moment the knife came crashing down on her. As quickly as the knife had entered her leg, it was out; and she was away. She was flying now, on her broom, still completely numb over what had just happened.

The shock that she was away now, alive, free and soaring seemed to block out the pain from the oozing wound and the angry yells coming from her window. All she felt now was the blessed breath flowing through her lungs, and in a weird, twisted way, she had never been happier. True, she was unbelievably angry and sad, but…she had to admit, it felt good to be alive.

It took a minute for Lily to register the pain, and she looked down to see her leg smeared red. And damn, it hurt like hell. Lily winced and gripped her broom tighter, flying faster, anything to ignore her pain. Yet, not even a tear fell from her eyes, because Lily Evans never cried. Ever.

The wind blew her tattered face and blew her what would be gorgeous auburn hair if it hadn't been blown carelessly about. Then again, why should she have to worry about her hair when her life was continuously at threat? Piercing green emerald eyes scanned the horizon. If you were brave enough to look into her eyes, or maybe if you were a foolish passerby with a curiosity the size of a dragon; you saw a pool of endless emotions and thoughts and worries. It all hit you at once, and you wonder how this girl could possibly live with so much anger, hatred, sadness, love, and happiness at the same time. She would probably die from spontaneous combustion, you thought.

Lily knew she was running away, the only question was, to where? Looking down at her bleeding leg, she decided it should be somewhere close. Then she remembered her best friend in the whole world. Why hadn't she remembered instantly? Leah didn't live that far away, it would take at least thirty minutes to get to her house.

Leah, like I said before, was Lily's best friend in the world. Secrets were bad, and lying to each other wasn't even considered. They trusted each other with absolutely anything and everything, and nothing less. They hadn't met until third year though, which was when Leah first arrived to Hogwarts. Lily loved hearing the story over and over again. At twelve, Leah was expelled from Dumstrang (another wizarding school) because she could not behave or get a long with the other students and teachers. Her parents signed the papers and she was sent to Hogwarts, where she met Lily. Then, in fifth year, her parents had died mysteriously over the summer. It was horrible, Lily sadly remembered the sobbing Leah at her doorstep, not knowing how, why, or when they died, but seeing their bodies still, sitting at the table, dead obviously for a good time. She lived alone at the age of fifteen, illegally, of course. Their death remained a secret until two weeks ago, when she turned seventeen and considered an adult. She reported her long-dead parents dead the night after due to a terrible car crash. The Ministry didn't even check, they never did. Lily was a frequent visitor at Leah's house, whenever she could she would escape and spend the rest of the summer there.

Lily spent the whole flight squinting to make out the tiny houses and towns and roads. Somehow, thirty minutes later, Lily found herself in the neighborhood of her friend. Leaning forward, the broom zoomed towards the ground at a dangerous speed. Skillfully, at the very moment she would have hit the ground, she yanked he broom upwards, resulting in a graceful landing. Lily had completely forgotten about her bleeding leg and stood her feet on the ground. The very moment her wounded left leg touched the ground, pain surged throughout her body.

"Damn it!" Lily decided to limp all the way down the street towards Leah's house. Ok, she admitted it must have looked extremely stupid, but it was either that or crawling. Now THAT would have looked stupid.

The cold sidewalk numbed her feet even further, so much she felt like running to just get it over with. Soon enough she was at the steps of medium sized home. Lily smiled to herself, the rest of the week with Leah! Oh, this would be great! She pressed the doorbell impatiently waiting for Leah to open the door. Inside, she heard footsteps on the wooden floor come rushing towards the door and unlocking it.

"Damn it. It's probably the government, I knew they were after me." Leah thought to herself as she unlocked the door and swung it open. In front of her was her best friend standing there helplessly. Leah had to blink once or twice to make sure it really was her.

"Hey there." Lily smiled broadly and widely. She leaned on the stair rail and just smiled.

"Lily?" Leah said in surprise, "Oh my God! I've missed you so much!" Leah swung Lily into a hug, as they laughed into each other's shoulders.

"Same here! This summer has been HELL!" Lily squeezed her friend tightly.

"I'm sorry! Here, come on inside." Leah let go of her and then she pulled her into the warm house and shut the door behind them.

"What brings you here anyway?" Leah asked curiously as they walked up the inside entry stairs.

"Uh, long story." Lily shrugged it off and leaned on the wooden railing once again to help herself up. Leah noticed this and quickly turned to face her.

"What did he do to you?" She demanded angrily.

"Leah, it's nothing big, really-"

"Liar!"

Lily sighed and looked down. "Fine," Her eyes met the worried ones of Leah, "He tried to kill me." She put it shortly and straight to the point.

Leah's eyes rounded like saucers in the sky. She bent forward and tightly grabbed her friend's hand and helped her up slowly. Letting Lily lean on her shoulder, she guided Lily to the living room, where Leah lay her down on the sofa with her leg sticking out in a stiff position.

"Are you alright, Lily?" Leah bit her lip, concerned about her.

"Oh, of course! It's only a small cut." With that, Lily pulled up the bottom of her pants to reveal her blood-spitting wound.

Again, Leah gasped.

"Small cut my arse. How the hell did you make it over here?" Leah asked, studying the wound, trying to decide how she would treat it.

"I flew, you know how I am with flying." Lily combed her orange hair behind her ear. "It was a really nice view, coming here." Lily added with a smile.

Leah laughed, "You're the only person I know who can get stabbed," Leah studied the deep cut, "with a knife is it, and still talk about how beautiful the view was." She shook her head and concentrated on the stab.

"Well, I'll tell you it was such a relief to be gone and alive that I completely forgot about it." Lily shrugged. "But it does hurt…a lot." She winced and added.

"Accio Magical Aid Kit!" Leah carelessly shot the spell out, and a box came zooming down and into her hands from upstairs, like a cannon on a war scene. Something about that made Lily's heart soak in happiness and warmth, it felt so good to be around magic once again.

"Here, let me use this." Leah dumped the boxes contents onto the sofa.

Lily groaned, "You're not going to fix it with magic, are you?"

"Of coarse not!" Leah shook her head; she along with Lily agreed that wounds should not be healed magically. "The medicine is magical, but it doesn't heal it, it just takes the pain away." Leah explained, and Lily agreed to it.

Lily studied her sister with love. They weren't blood related, but they had decided that you didn't need to be blood related to be sisters. Leah had dark, brown, chestnut hair. Her eyes, too, were a milky brown. Wide and excited; and ready to face the world head-on. She was average height and quite slim, but not dangerously slim. She was also mysterious, and only two people in the world really knew her. Like Lily, don't you dare mistake her for a happy person…or a helplessly depressed person either.

"So, what have you been doing over the summer?" Lily asked curiously, leaning her back on the arm of the green leather sofa.

"Well," Leah started as she began to treat the wound, "I've been visiting Remus lately-"

"How's he doing? It's a full moon." Lily interrupted, but after being without contact of her friends for so long she wanted to know everything that had happened.

"He's doing so-so. The rest of his Marauder friends can't make it all of the time to his transformations, and his wolf is used to them." Leah explained.

"I wish we could go and help him. You know, I hate the full moon because of what it does to him."

Leah sighed, "I do too, and it's not fair. But there's nothing we can do about it now."

"I know...I wish there was though. Poor Remus, he has to endure a lot of prejudice towards him. I'd do almost anything to help him, if I could." Lily said, staring out into the space.

"And that is why I will find a cure or a treatment for werewolves." Leah announced as she added the final touches to Lily's leg, and gave it a soft slap, indicating she was finished.

"It's beautiful!" Lily joked as she studied the cloth that was tightly wrapped around her leg. "Well, Dr. Lee-lee, I think you've succeeded once again!" They then gave each other a playful high-five.

Lily swung her feet back onto the floor and stood up, Leah following her gesture proudly. "What time is it?" Lily asked.

"Uh, one-o'clock, why?" Leah asked, checking her watch.

"Because I'm so bloody tired, and I want to go to bed." Lily stretched her arms over her head and let the most welcome yawn escape out of her mouth.

Leah yawned as well, yawns are contagious. "I guess I'll go to bed as well." Leah shrugged and they both made there way up the beige-carpet covered stairs. The pain had evaporated from Lily's leg, and she was free to move about without the piercing pain.

Lily smiled as she saw the pictures plastered on Leah's walls. They contained magical, or moving pictures of Lily and Leah and some with Remus. Others were of Hogwarts and it's majestic landscapes or mysterious and narrow hallways leading into darkness or unexpected creatures. Some hallways had only been seen once before to anyone, and others lay buried and left for someone to yet discover.

Then, remembering the items in her pockets, told Leah, "I'm going to go put this in my room, kay?"

Yes, Lily had her own room, and it was decorated with silver, blue, and purple items. It was rather empty, but once Lily enlarged her items with a simple incantation, it was rather cozy. After brushing her teeth and changing into her pajamas, she ran to Leah's room and knocked.

"Don't knock! Just come in!" Leah opened the door from inside, she too ready to sleep.

"I love being here." Lily sighed and looked around Leah's room.

"I love having you over." Leah smiled and sprawled herself over her bed. Lily plopped into a fluffy bean-bag chair.

"Let's talk about something." Lily suggested, and rested her head on the fluffy bed and pulling a small blanket over her body.

"Ok, what?" Leah asked drowsily.

"Well," Lily began to finger the blanket carelessly, "we could talk about what else we did this summer."

"Ok, how about you start." Leah suggested.

"No, I want to hear about you. Nothing interesting happened to me."

"Well, this summer has been boring without you." Leah admitted. "But I did visit Remus, and his jack-ass friends were over."

"Oh, THEM, they are so annoying." Lily groaned.

"I know, always acting like such pricks. But Remus says they're really great people, just hardly anyone takes the time to get to know them."

"Well how are we supposed to know that when they always act like such asses around everyone else?" Lily asked.

"But they have to be good friends if they became Anamagi for him."

"True." Lily nodded. "But Potter never lays off of anyone. It's always torture for them until he's satisfied."

"And Peter, what good does he do? All he does is make dumb comments and follow them around."

"Exactly, and Sirius, he just walks around the school expecting every girl to drop down to his feet. Black and Potter are pricks!" Lily flailed her arms around in the air.

"You look funny when you do that." Leah commented and yawned again, and closed her eyes.

"I heard that when you yawn the second time it means you're not tired anymore." Lily announced the random fact, only to realize Leah was practically asleep.

"Well, g'night."

Leah mumbled an incoherent good night in return.

"G'night." Lily whispered and flicked the lights off with her wand as she walked out of the room. She tip-toed across the hallway and into her room.

The bed was soft and the blankets were warm. Oh how she loved being in an actual bed, how she missed it. The world was different when you were living in your attic, watching every sly step someone makes. You fears never rested, and they never died. They lived and dwelled in your shadow, and once the lights go out, everything is a shadow.