Disclaimer for the stupid: Ranma Nibun no Ichi does not belong to me. Viz, please do not sue me. Well, then again under the Fair Use Rule of the United States Copyright Act (1976) they can't. PUaHAahAHhHAhahA! Business classes are fun.
This fic, being a Romance/Humor (Or Humor/Romance) just like the original series will be Ran/Ak, Uk/Ryo, Sha/Mousse. There will be a few (2-3) OC's, but worry not! They will not be the main focus of the story. Just as Mousse isn't the main character, neither shall my OC's be.
R.I.P 2pac.
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"Ranma, it's snowing!!"
Ranma, sprawled out on the floor with a panda arm laying across his chest, muttered groggily. "Hu.. wha... food?"
Akane shook her head and snorted. i Just like that baka* to think of food /i. "No, baka. Snow, not food."
"Snowcones?"
"SNOW YOU BAKA!" It was about this time that Ranma actually gained consciousness. He opened his eyes and the first thing he noticed was Akane leaning over him. "What are you yelling for you..." iSexy, sexy woman?/i "... kawaiikune* tomboy?"
Akane frowned, noticing the pause between 'you' and his usual insults. iWonder what he was thinking...Hmmm I'll let that one pass./I
Noticing Akane in thought, he asked. "Er, something about snowcones I think..." Akane sighed.
"No... it's snowing. You know, powdery white stuff that falls from the sky?" At this, Ranma groaned loudly.
"Why... WHY?? It's February already..." As he continued ranting, Akane tilted her head to the side curiously and leaned closer to him. Ranma stopped ranting abruptly.
"Pure thoughts, clean thoughts, no distractions, pure, clean, distractionless thoughts..."
Akane turned around quickly to hide her smile. Her plan had worked! But er... now what? She shook her head happily. "Hentai.*" She said as she walked out of the room, sashaying her hips a little.
Ranma drew back quickly, index and pinky finger extended. "Ack! Did I say that out loud?" He sighed loudly noticing Akane already gone and kicked the large smelly panda next to him. iGreat way to start the day, I've already pissed her off./i
Meanwhile, walking down the hallway, Akane smiled to herself. iWhat a great way to start the day!/i She giggled slightly. iMaybe I should wake him up more often?/i
Ten minutes later, as the Tendo family ate breakfast, prepared by Kasumi of course, Ranma suddenly realized that two things that were very important in his morning routine had not happened. 1) He had not had a morning work-out with his father, and 2) Genma was not trying to steal his food. This was because he was not sitting in his usual place, diagonal from Genma and across from Nabiki. Today he was across from Kasumi and on the other side of Akane.
The Tendos were shocked when Ranma stopped inhaling his food. Even more shocking was the thoughtful look on his face. Soun was the first to speak up. "What is it Ranma? Demons? Dojo destroyers?"
[The end of the world? Demi-gods?] Genma signed.
"No... it can't be... HAPPOUSAI!?!?" Akane gasped. A collective wail arose from the family. Ranma sweat-dropped.
"Er... no... I just realized I wasn't sitting in my usual place today.
[What's your problem boy?! Scaring us like that.] Genma remarked before he smacked the back of Ranma's head from across the table with his sign. Ranma rubbed the back of his head embarrassedly, and Akane giggled causing Ranma to grin stupidly. iHeh, maybe today won't be so bad after all. She's pretty cute when she laughs like that..../i
As Ranma and Akane walked to school, Ranma decided for once not to walk on the fence. He hopped down next to Akane nonchalantly as he could, and was remarkably not splashed once with cold water during the duration of the trip. The snow was somehow not turning him into a girl, either. All it did was provide a peaceful blanketing effect.
Akane smiled that he was walking next to her despite the fact that nothing else was happening. She nervously kicked at the snow and blushed slightly when she noticed that Ranma had been looking at her. iThe snow... it's kind of romantic. Just like one of Yuka's shoujo manga.../I
He prayed silently that no one would interfere today. For the first time in a while he was starting to think that maybe, just maybe, he had a chance with Akane.
During the walk to school, he admired the scenery (not Akane... well not ionly/i Akane) The snow was... beautiful. It put a white blanket on everything, making the entire city look pristine, and for once, peaceful. Before them the road was completely unspoiled, and behind them were a single pair of footprints, two people alone... he liked that thought. It reminded him of those cheesy romantic movies where the couple would walk down an undisturbed beach in the middle of nowhere. Alone, with each other.
Akane smiled, watching Ranma's features. She felt like a giddy schoolgirl, and she wasn't sure why. Sure moments of silence like this between them were rare (comfortable silence that is) but why did she feel like dancing around? She giggled again (why had she been giggling so much lately?) as a particularly large snowflake landed on his nose and stuck. She reached over to wipe it off...
Ranma was shocked out of his silent reverie of nature as he felt something warm brush against his face. Incredulously, he looked to see who it was. He was dreading seeing Shampoo (despite the fact that something as subtle as a touch on the nose was way too subtle to be the Amazon) but... It was Akane.
Physical contact! Initiated by HER! Non-violently! iOkay Ranma... stay calm.../i
She looked up at him smiling. It seemed to him that she was glowing. "You had a snowflake on your nose."
He stared at her silently for a moment, making her feel slightly uncomfortable. Then, out of nowhere, he reached out and ran his fingers through her hair.
"You had some snow in your hair." He said matter-of-factly.
She was shaking, rather violently, and Ranma feared for the worse. Her eyes were hidden by her bangs in a manner that seemed to foretell doom and painful death.
"Ranma... you baka... messing with my hair..." She kneeled down and clenched her fist.
"N-no!! Akane I'm sorry I didn't want to upset you I just... I..."
She stood up suddenly, and he noticed she was laughing. And had a snowball in her hand. "Tenchu!*" she screamed as she flung it at him, hitting him right in the face.
"Oi*." He muttered through a faceful of snow. "Ya damn tomboy... that's not cool ya know..." He bent down and picked up some snow of his own. "Jinchu!!*" He yelled as he threw it at her, hitting her in the belly.
Back and forth this continued for nearly ten minutes, until a gigantic snowball Akane had thrown in response to Ranma's 'Kachuu Tenshin Amaguriken* – Revised Snowball Version' knocked him into a street sign, that happened to have a clock on it.
"Ano*... Akane-chan?"
"Hai*, Ranma-kun?" The suffixes not going unnoticed between either of them.
"...I think we're late."
"Demo*... demo we left early! We can't be..." she looked up at the rather large clock which said that they were indeed late. "Come on baka! We're late!" she yelled as she grabbed him by the collar and ran at a breakneck pace dragging him behind her towards the school. This was nothing special, he had learned it was much easier to relax than to resist this. In fact, he'd finished many a breakfast being towed mid-air by a frantic Akane.
When they reached the gates of Furinkan HS, (with Akane making a rather impressive leap to get over them) they were nearly (or only, depending on how you saw it*) twenty minutes late.
When they arrived at their class together (some odd quirk – they shared EVERY class together with the exception of home-ec and team sports – Ranma opting to have 2 PE classes and Akane trying to learn rather unsuccessfully to cook) their teacher informed them rather informatively, that they were late.
"Er... sensei there is a reasonable explanation for this.*" Akane said.
"Right, uh... Shampoo..."
"Bike." Akane said, making an odd hand gesture that she seemed to think signified a bike.
"Hit me." He said pointing to the back of his neck where there was in fact, a bruise.
"Tofu." Akane said.
"Doctor Tofu that is." Ranma finished.
"Huge line... Kasumi stopped by... contusions and dislocations everywhere..." Akane said. This made the sensei shudder, he himself having been a one time victim of Kasumi-ified Dr. Tofu.
"Evil little ghoul with one long gnarly leg made of wood." Ranma said, taking a page from Akane's book and making nonsensical gestures.
"Shampoo's grandmother, that is."
The teacher waved his hands. "That's enough... I understand the gist of your story. It's a miracle you got here alive and only twenty minutes late. Please, have a seat. And Ranma, would you inform your Fiancee that there is a door so she does not need to jump through my window or wall to get to you?"
Akane looked surprised. "But I haven't jumped through a window or wall in..." she counted on her fingers, "At least three months."
He blinked behind his glasses. "I was speaking of Shampoo. I was under the opinion you did not wish to be referred to as Ranma's fiancée?"
It was Akane's turn to rub the back of her neck embarrassedly. "Ah well you know..."
"Of course." The Sensei said, smiling behind a book. iAhhhh young love.../i "Ranma, please open to page 85 of the book and tell me the answer to exercise 5."
Ranma opened his math book and miraculously, knew the answer. "What is 5 root 7?"
The sensei blinked. "Ranma-kun, this is not Jeopardy, nor is it Algebra 1-2." Akane buried her face in her hands.
"Uh... what class is it?"
"The one you spend the majority of your time spending outside holding water buckets."
"Oh... Geography. Right."
"No."
"History?"
"No."
"Uh… what other classes do I have?"
"Well, English for one."
"Oh. Exercise 5... hmm lets see..." Two miracles in one day, he (thought he) knew the answer again! "Right, it's not 'What are the problem, miss?' it's 'What the problem is, lady?"
"Close, much closer than usual Ranma, and for that I give you credit, however you are still incorrect. The answer is "What is the problem, miss?' You should work on your grammar if you hope to pass this class, which you still can."
"Wait… grammar? I thought this was English?"
"It is."
"But they don't have grammar in English... do they??"
"I'm afraid they do Ranma."
"Sou ka...*" he muttered as if just discovering a government conspiracy to hide the fact that the fate of the earth rested in the hands of a lecherous teenager's ability to catch a luscious alien woman in a game of tag.*
~******~******~
In the middle of History, which he also had with the same middle-aged very proper speaking sensei as English (the majority of his classes were with him or Hinako) while Ranma was almost napping, he was called on once again.
"Ranma-kun, page 85 exercise 5 once again please."
"History this time... right?"
His sensei merely nodded.
"Who is Sarutobi Sasuke*" The sensei shook his head in disbelief.
"Once again Ranma, this is not a gameshow. However, you are correct."
Ranma merely leaned back, eyes wide open, stunned. "Whoa... I'm right..."
Ten minutes later the euphoria had worn off and he was once again bored. He was laying with his head on his arms, sideways.
Trying to get a look at Akane.
Sometimes he liked to just watch her. Talking with her friends, walking around, jogging, working out in the dojo. Whatever she did she just seemed to radiate beauty. Once again he started to feel that aching, longing feeling in the pit of his chest again, however this time tinged by hope. She was doodling on a sheet of paper, absently.
She was so... cute. A lot of the time he liked that more than downright sexy such as say, Shampoo. There was something about her that made him just want to hold her. To console her whenever something went wrong and tell her everything would be all right. That he would make it better.
He'd seen her crying before, and it was the absolute worst feeling he'd ever had. Because he knew he was the reason she had been crying. He wanted to do something, anything to make her feel better but he couldn't. Nothing he could think of to do. It was at that point, nearly a week ago now that he had decided that he would try to be better, a better person.
A better person so he wouldn't make her cry. And it had worked – he hadn't seen her crying since that day because of him (she still cried over cheesy movies and soap operas)... He smiled at that thought. Sometimes it was too easy to look past that part of her, and only see the part that was violent, sometimes insane, a horrible cook, and incredibly dense about matters as obvious as her pet. But there was another side of her that he was starting to see more – the side that was deathly afraid of watching horror movies alone in the dark, the part that cried over cheesy things like soap operas, and tried to cook something nice for him. The part, he thought, that looked absolutely stunning in a wedding dress.
He couldn't blame Ryouga for sleeping with Akane as a pig really. Oh what he wouldn't give to be in Ryouga's position, her hugging him to her chest, pressing closely...
"ACK!!!" He shouted, stopping his train of thought from leading off. He sounded like he was choking on his own tongue.
"Ranma-kun, is there something wrong?" asked the sensei. Akane too was looking at him.
"*cough hack cough cough* Er... nothing."
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There you go. First chapter. The first two I think will be the 'perfect day' and then everything will go to hell -____-||||
You know what they say... conflict makes a story interesting...
Note that the chapters may occasionally switch b perspectives /B but happen simultaneously with other chapters. IE the next chapter will probably be Ry/Uk perspective.
Note: I promise at least 5 story pages per chapter, and no more than a 3 day delay between chapters unless something cataclysmic happens. Like... another power outage. And can someone tell me how to get the 3 dots here? I use them all the time but they come out as just 1 period for some reason.
uJapanese/u
baka – stupid, idiot, etc.
kawaiikune – Ranma's slurring of kawaiikunai, meaning uncute
hentai – pervert
oi – hey
ano – ummm
demo – but!
Sarutobi Sasuke – famous ninja. Guess who the Kuno family ninja is named after? Gee I wonder.
Sou ka – I see…
Tenchu – divine punishment/wrath of heaven. Also a PS2 game.
Jinchu – revenge/punishment from men. Also name of a story arc of Rurouni Kenshin
"the fate of the earth rested in the hands of a lecherous teenager's ability to catch a luscious alien woman in a game of tag." – a reference to Urusei Yatsura, another piece of Rumiko Takahashi genius.