Disclaimers: I do not own Rurouni Kenshin. Watsuki-sensei does, and it'll be his best work 'til the day he dies!

Notes: Surprise! Not much to say about this one, only that it has nothing to do with the OAV of the same name. This one might be a little less 'cheery' than my other fics have been, but I need to broaden my horizons by checking out other genres. With that said, I hope I don't make you cry... too much. :)

Reflections

By Sean Montgomery

It wasn't supposed to happen this way.

The thought rolled over and over in his head. The one agonizing thought that tore at his mind and gnawed on his soul, refusing to give him moments of rest. That was why he was leaning against the wall instead of on the futon next to his dozing wife, sleeping as soundly as he wished he was himself. His mind was constantly repeating it, his heartbeat making it a cadence.

"{Why, why, why...}"

Why did it happen like this? Was it because of how hesitant he was, how nervous he was to tell his son one of the darkest secrets of his father's life? Was it because he had never wanted to tell his son at all? Was it because he had decided to lock away the fighting styles of his life forever, only to make his son angry and leave them?

His troubled breathing grew louder with his thoughts, giving small insight to the war raging in his mind. His eyes, rooted to one spot on the floor, were glazed over, fixed for the moment on a memory that tore at him, and only continued to do so every time he thought of it.

Why? Why was it like this?

It wasn't supposed to happen this way....

"Kenshin?"

The sound of his wife's tired voice made him look at her. Sitting up slowly, still half asleep but concerned enough to be awake, Kaoru turned to him and rubbed a hand over her eyes. "What are you doing?"

At any other moment, Kenshin would have smiled and told her everything was all right, that she needed to get back to sleep so she could teach her students the next day. No such thing came out of his mouth. He only stared, the pain inside fully evident to his bride of many years. Kaoru's brow furrowed with her confusion. "Anata? What's wrong?"

"Why did it happen like this?" he asked, his voice barely reaching a whisper. "Why didn't I tell him sooner?"

Immediately remembering the incident that occurred that afternoon, Kaoru moved out of the futon and sat next to him. "It's not your fault. You didn't know it would be like this."

Kenshin seemed to miss that she even spoke, falling once again into the memory that haunted him. "Did you see his face? Such anger, the hurt... betrayal. He was so angry." He paused. "And I'm the only one to blame."

"That's not true. We both decided we would tell him once he got back from Kyoto."

"But when would that be? Years? It was wrong for us to wait for so long. We should have known he would have found out. I'm at fault for never telling him."

"Kenshin, that's not true." she said sternly. "We both made this decision."

"That doesn't make a difference." For the first time, Kenshin turned to look at her, the pain clearly evident on his face. "He *knows* now. And I wasn't the one who told him. Would you want such a secret hidden from you for so long only to learn it from someone else? About you own father? The one thing we thought we could hide for a while longer... we were so foolish!"

His frustration was clearly vocalized, and Kaoru thought nothing of it. Over the years of their marriage, Kenshin had learned, slowly, but quickly, how to be more open in his thoughts to his wife. He would never do such a thing in public - some things never changed about her beloved ex-Rurouni - only in the privacy of their own home, when he would share with her a thought or something that struck him funny during the day. Even things that seemed harmless on the outside, but quietly hurt.

This however, could only be described as anguish.

Why had their relationship changed so dramatically over the last few years? Kenji had always loved being around his father as a boy, even if he sometimes preferred the company of his mother. The striking physical features would always light up in the yard when she watched the two of them play games with each other, Kenji's in enthusiastic joy, Kenshin's in healing wonder at the childhood years he never knew but came to know through his son.

Was it through the genes that they boy had wanted to learn how to fight? And had he really grown up so fast that he was ready to leave in order to learn a fighting style his father would refuse to teach, unaware at Kenshin's quiet sadness?

"We should have told him." he was still saying. "Maybe he would have understood why I didn't want him to learn if we had just told him..."

Kaoru snuck her arms around his shoulders, easing his head onto hers. She held him in place for a while, her nose gently pressed against his temple, and waited for his arms to come around her waist before trying to speak. "We can't do anything about it now. Kenji knows, and we'll just have to deal with it." She took a moment to kiss his scarred cheek. "The next time he comes back from Kyoto we'll tell him the whole story."

"Much easier said than done." he sighed.

"But it *must* be done."

Kenshin's head fell back against the wall, his eyes searching the boards above as if searching for an answer. The question in his mind came out in complete agony, the silence making the burden on both their shoulders seemingly heavier.

"How do you tell your son something like that? How do you tell him that the manslayer he's heard about is yourself? How do you do it when he already knows?"

Kaoru paused before answering, searching for the right thing to day. "You tell him everything. You tell him about your training, the missions... even Tomoe. The reasons why you don't want to pass the style on. You told us the complete story. It's Kenji's turn now."

"You didn't know." he said, fighting the resolve she was trying to set. "He does. I fear my trying to tell him will only..."

"{... make him hate you more.}" she mentally finished. She lifted a hand and turned his face to hers. "The worst thing you could do is not tell him. At least you have some time before he comes back to give him the whole story."

Kenshin didn't respond, only removed her hand and let his head fall on her shoulders. Kaoru only hugged him close. "That doesn't help you very much, does it?"

"I appreciate you trying to help, Koishii." his said, his voice muffled by her yukata. "It's just a hard thing to deal with right now, that it is."

"Don't worry. I plan on helping you all through this. We're in this together now."

It was the first time that night he had smiled. She could feel it spreading on her shoulder and gently pressing into her neck. She was mentally grateful that he had calmed down enough to do so.

"You have no idea how glad I am, Kaoru. You have no idea."

Regardless of Kaoru's help, the thoughts of how to fully deal with the situation still haunted him when he fell asleep.

It wasn't supposed to be this way...

Phew! Angst-y all around! And drama! I'm really going for it here!

I know this is short. This is a prologue, after all. They're short too. I'm setting a goal of having long(er) chapters, so the next update might not be for a little bit. Until then, I hope you can understand the tone I'm trying to set for this story, and I hope it catches your attention until the next update. Until that time, I hope to read your wonderful reviews (hint, hint) and feel encouraged to do more!

See you next on the chapter!