Silver:  Hello ^^  I was thinking if some of the old reviewers are still reading…but at least I still got some reviews ^^

Thanks to:

Kara-chan:

Silver:  Kai's jealous!  ::getting away from Kai::

Kai:  Stop saying that!

Rei:  ::still snuggling with Max::

Max:  …

Silver:  WAH!!!  I'm being whack by the steel hammer!  ::gets hit on the head by Kai::  itai mo…

Tyson:  ::glomps onto Kai::

Silver:  Whew…anyway!  Here Kara-chan ^^  ::gives Kara some MaRe mechanical pencils, trap books, and a limited edition of the MaRe plushie::

Golden Lass:

Silver:  Don't worry…I'll try to update this often ^_~

Max:  …why is Mazie so mean to me…?

Silver:  Cause she's a slob and wants Rei all to herself…such a spoil brat too -_-

Rei:  I love my Maxie a lot better!  ::glomping onto Max::

Silver:  What a kawaii moment…  Here you go ^^  ::gives Golden Lass a MaRe hairbrush, tiger plushie that's the same color as Drigger, and a light colored watch::

Rumi-chan:

Silver:  Wow…she can be able to destroy at least a million of Mazie with an attack like that ^^;;;

Max:  You're just not that special, Silver…

Silver:  True…and Rumi's string of cursing does make about 20 sailors blush ^^

Rei:  ::looks over at the sailors::  Never mind that I saw that…

Silver:  Panda plushie are sooo kawaii!  Here:  ::Rumi receives blue furry rabbit plushie that's about 5 inches tall including the ears, Mazie double-smashing with missile activation buttons, and a very kawaii notebook with MaRe and TyKai::

It's the.... GRAMMAR-NAZI!! Dun dun dun.... :

Silver:  wow…you notice a lot of those things…and you know a lot of grammar ^^;;

Max:  Silver will never get her tenses right .

Silver:  It's not my fault that I can't help it that I always make grammar mistakes ^^;;

Rei:  Are you sure about that…?

Silver:  ………

Max:  See, see!  She

Silver:  Oh quiet down, Max!  Anyway!  Here's your present ^^.  ::You receive the grammar award of the year, some MaRe stickers, and the very adorable polar bear plushie::  Arigatoo, and I'll keep in mind of my grammar…though the tips will help me…since I didn't know about those things ^^

FREAK014:

Silver:  Glad you liked it ^_~

Max:  On your bio…you  don't have MaRe on it… T.T

Silver:  ::sigh::  Let her choose what's right…anyway!  You're paired up with…okay never mind ^^;;

Tyson:  ::on sugar high::  WAH, WAH, WAH!!!  Let's see the hippos flying on the rooftop!

Max:  ::goes with Tyson:

Silver:  …I'm not going to ask about that…  anyway, here you go ^^  ::Freak014 receives lifetime warranty of MaRe knives, MaRe drawing/painting book, and a complete deluxe set of Beyblade plushie::

~~That's the end of that ^^  Now…going on to the chapter!  By the way, Mazie's conflict with Max should be in this chapter…unless I have nowhere to talk about it then.  Max's P.O.V. in this chapter ^^~

~-~-~- ||Casting My Love Away|| ~-~-~-

Chapter 4:  Deep Hidden Memories

I was letting my fingers slipped, and Rei was able to elevate my shirt, seeing all of my bruises, cats, stabs, and scratches.  I was afraid of letting anyone get closer to me… especially Rei out of everyone.

I looked at his expression, and it looked like he was turning pale.

"Max…what's in bizarre name have they done to you…?"

I heard him asked, and I never wanted to tell him.  I let my lips go into my mouth, and I looked down at the floor.  It was interesting looking at the blocks than having a discussion with Rei.  I felt my head being elevated and my eyes were gazing at his golden ones.

I felt all these butterflies in my stomach about to burst, but they refused to be free.  So, the feeling stayed in my stomach, and it felt…quite safe and warm.  I felt him lifting me up and letting my eyes stay in his.

"Max…you should have told me about this…"

That's when I snapped.  I couldn't tell him because he didn't give a damn about me!  He didn't love me the way I wanted him to…that began to fumble with my life.  I felt my eyes glaring at Rei's, but his eyes were still revealing those same emotions I wanted him to have then.

"You don't give a shit about me!  That's why I didn't tell you a fuckin' thing!  Let me go already!"

"But…Max…I did care about you…"

"Not the way I wanted!  You think you can solve everything just like that, but you're wrong!  I'm not like anyone else, and I won't be controlled ever again!  You think that you love me, but you don't!  No one does, and no one will ever---!"

I was beginning to think that I said way too much…and I felt his hand collided with my cheek…the same one that was I felt when I was rejected…

"Stop judging people like that!  It makes me sick to know that you have changed for the worse!  There are people who care for you!"

I glared at him, and I retaliate with a punch into his stomach.  I saw him lean over, and I still had that glare.  I hate it when people tell me someone loves me…because they don't!  No one would be stupid enough to talk with me!

"How am I supposed to know your feelings?!  You never said a thing to me, and you made me like a total jerk I am in the first place!"

"How can I change you into an outcast?!"

"You want to know?!  You want to know what happened that day??  I'll tell you then!"

I looked at Rei, and his face started to soften.  He tried to reach for my cheek, but I flinched when he almost reached there.  I guess that I still wasn't used to be this close with Rei…but I know I probably will never with anyone…especially since most of my only true friends and family aren't alive.

""Max…I won't hurt you…"

"And you don't have my trust, Rei.  A month of friendship and the whole thing's off just like that because of my feelings?!  That was the worst thing anyone could have done to me."

"…Max"

"I'm going to just tell you about it…nothing more and nothing less."

I  see him nod, and it was my queue to begin.

~~Flashback after the Rejection~~  (Still Max P.O.V.)

(Disclaimer:  This song doesn't belong to me, but it was made by Sakamoto Kyuu.  His song that was sung by another group in English was called Sukiyaki.  I'm doing the Japanese wordings.)

I was still crying, until my heart told me it was enough for now.  I sat up and looked at the sky.  Wherever I go and whenever I do, I always see that reflection of Rei in the sky, buildings, and even the dirtiest place.  As I got up, I have decided something that I never thought I would expect.

I'm going to fly solo for the rest of my life.  No friends, families, lovers…nothing of those concerning me at all.  Just me, myself, and….I…

I started walking down to the sidewalk, and looked at the upsetting sunset around me.  It was bugging me with those bright colors that will soon turn into the darkness where demons roamed. 

ue o muite arukou
namida ga kobore naiyouni
omoidasu harunohi
hitoribotchi no yoru

I looked up at the store that were having non-prescription glasses on sale, and I decided that I will make myself look like someone who wants to me left alone…someone that no one will recognize as the old me, but the "geek-looking weird kid" identity.  I walked inside, and looked at the different frames and style of choosing.  I look at this green one with some texture of the moon.  I paid for it, and then I headed back home, with my new glasses on.

As I walked home, I thought about all the great time Rei and I had…had

That would be the last time I'll ever have that moment with Rei…I might be tough now…forget about the past…but the sorrow haunts me.

I remembered the first day I was with Rei…I was sitting alone on the tables, and he just introduce himself to me.  That was the happiest moment that I have ever had in school…and it would be the last…

Rei…you have all the happiness now…keep it…let the sky and star bless you…

ue o muite arukou
namida ga kobore naiyouni
omoidasu harunohi
hitoribotchi no yoru

As I continue walking, I saw Rei's house.  I saw him looking quite happy with his family…oblivious to the fact that I was watching him and thinking of sorrow that was held in my heart.

I clutched my heart, and it was beating at an irregular beat.  What was happening to me…?  I saw someone staring at me, but I ran away quickly before I knew whom it was.  My heart wasn't beating regularly…could it be…the disease from my real parents?  I don't know…I'm alone in the rain, but feeling to go back home yet…

(whistling)
omoidasu akinohi
hitoribotchi no yoru
kanashimi wa hosino kageni
kanashimi wa tsukino kageni

Yet, I was at the front of my door.  I opened it and go into the home.  My parents look like me, and it was a shock to see them staring at me irregularly. 

"What did you get glasses from?  You have perfect vision!"

"Mom…it's personal business that I won't let anyone in."

"Son, don't treat us like that…you don't look great with glasses!"

"Dad, let me do what I want.  If I want glasses, I wear them everywhere.  I don't care about my appearance."

"Max-kun!  Don't do that to us!  We want you to be the best looking boy in the entire school!"

"Everyone beat me to that already…what's the use…I hate the popular kids…"

All of a sudden, my father slapped me across the face and into the wall.

"You can't hate popular kids!  You are one and will be one!"

"Butt out, dad!  I don't need this jabbering!  I'm out of here!"

My father slapped me again before I left to my room.  Even my parents hate me…I'm…all alone…like I wanted…

I felt my tears rolling down my cheeks and wiping it away.  I looked at the sky, and I whispered one wish…that was to never find true love…

ue o muite arukou
namida ga kobore naiyouni
nakinagara aruku
hitoribotchi no yoru
(whistling)

~~End of Flashback~~

I looked at Rei…it was unbelievable to say…he was actually…looking guilty.  After these two years of hardness and being a rock, I won't fall for the guiltiness trick.

"To that extend, Rei, Mazie was the first person who took it hard…she slapped me three times that same day…wanting me to change back to normal…"

"…Max?  You know that person that was staring at you that night…?"

"What about it?  It's no importance to me now."

"If you actually looked in my eyes that night…none of this would have happened."

"Whatever you say.  Nothing will change this now…plus…you looked happy that night.  Too happy like you're happy that I don't have to be stuck with you in the group."

"No…you're taking this wrong…"

That was when I snapped.  He was doing it again…making me lose my concentration and making me feel guilty.  I was supposed to be the one that was supporting myself.  I felt myself stumble onto the floor, and Rei…he was…kneeling down with me…support me up.  I already told him I don't need his help.

"Stop supporting me.  I can do it on my own…"

"Max…you need help right now…everything that happened to you is overwhelming…you need to rest from school…"

"Don't even think about it…I'm going into English class no matter what you try to talk me out of."

"Please…Max.  Just this one important thing…you need to ask the doctor about that irregular heartbeats…it may be fatal."

"Rei…mind your own business!  I don't need your 'mother hen' act.  Just leave me alone!"

I was waiting for Rei to move, but no action was taking place.  I wanted him to move away from me so bad…but instead, I felt his arms snaking around my waist, and he pulled me against him.

I felt his breath on my shoulders…he was looking at me with hurtful eyes…something I never saw in him before.  I never knew that he actually cared that much…wait a minute!  He's not supposed to care!  When I look up at his eyes, they were gleaming with tears ready to fall.  Since we were on the floor, his eyes were above me…so I can't turn away from them…

"Max…I really do care about you…just let me do this one thing for you…please…?"

"How can I be sure…especially with…those rejecting words in my mind…"

"Just…don't think…about the past.  I'll be here to take care of you…"

"…what makes you think you could take care of me…when you have other important things to do without….me…"

"…That's just…you are more important…to me…than having…friends that aren't friends at all…you're just…immature people…"

I felt his hand, cupping my cheeks, as we both were leaning into each other…

We were getting closer…..

And closer….

Until….

Rei's mouth took my mouth into a desirable kiss.  We never had a kiss together…but yet…Rei was kissed almost everyday…I was never kissed in my life…

I never knew what was in my mind…until Rei broke the seal…

I saw his golden eyes with a lot of brightness and compassion…making me wonder if he did kiss me for myself…or was it a bet from his friends…?

Whatever it was…I wanted to be with him…it feels all floaty…and happiness was one thing…I wanted the most…

I felt Rei's hand ruffling my straight, flat hair, to my old hairstyle, fluffy and ruffled blonde hair…then…I felt his hand taking my glasses off, and he was looking into my eyes…

I guess when he didn't look at me clearly when we were in 6th grade…he wanted a remainder of the past…

"Max…I never wanted to leave you in the first place…you were really special…after we split up…I never felt this strong feeling I had around you…it makes me feel alive…that I could have a moment…a true moment…with you…"

"…Rei.  I thought you were straight the whole time…"

"……my heart said I wasn't straight anymore…after a few days of your change…"

"I guess…changing my appearance…does have an effect then…"

I felt his hand in his hair, getting all of the gel off and returning my hair to my childhood one… (V-force/G-Revolution hair)  Rei was pulling me into his chest, letting this moment run as long as he wanted…until I noticed the time…

Rei's eyes were telling me to stay…but I really didn't want to miss class…

I decided to be nice for the rest of the day…so I lend him a hand to get up.  I placed my hand on his hair, and brushing through it with my hand…

It felt like the running ocean when you stroke the water with you hand…except Rei's hair…felt like really soft silk…

I was looking at the glasses, and I was wondering if I should…be myself and have a lot of friends…or stay solo…

But for now…I'm going to stay with Rei…hopefully until the end of the week…

My love and faith for him…may be at the minimum…but if he doesn't let bad thing happen again…maybe I'll…be with him…like I always wanted…like…Tyson and Kai…

Maybe…Tyson will be my friend again…if he lets me…I feel like…having a friend now…after all…I'm returning to my old self…I think…

~~To Be Continued!~~

Silver:  Wow!  Sorry for the long wait!  There's your next chapter!  Sorry for not adding any TyKai moments…I promise some next chapter or a few more ^_~

Max:  You're supposed to stay with the MaRe!

Silver:  Don't worry!  ::pats Max's back::  MaRe will be my favorite no matter what ^_~

Rei:  I think she's addicted to MaRe a little too much…

Tyson:  I'll say…she used to like TyKai A LOT…now it's her second T.T

Kai:  ::patting Tyson's back::  At least she still reads them…

Silver:  ::grabbing her laptop looking for tons of MaRe and TyKai fanfictions::  I'll be searching for some great things ^_~  Keep reviewing!

~~Silver-chan