LOOK SMART

chapter one

Dear Diary,

Today is like any other day in school. I think I failed geometry test

again. My teacher is so stupid! Why does he give us a test every week

anyway? I mean, up until now I failed each test. I'm probably going to be

kicked out, or even worse be left back in school! How emberassing. But then

again it really isn't all that bad. I mean if you fail then you HAVE to get a

tutor.

At first I was a little resistant. A tutor? Only REALLY stupid people

get those. But when I found out who it was I was so elated and terrified at

the same time! Happy because I only have the biggest crush on him and

terrified because he probably thinks I'm some retard who doesn't know the

difference between a polygon and cosine. But it's not that I'm stupid. I try

REALLY hard. I study at least two hours of geometry every night and I still

fail, which probably makes it worse that I fail because I try. It's like when I

see the test my mind goes blank.

Well, it's nothing I can do now. But at least I get to spend a couple

of hours with him every week. To think we'll be alone! My heart is just

pounding thinking about him! But he can never know that I like him. Because

the truth of the matter is he hates me...

----

"Aya!!" Tomoyo whined as we left the classroom. "Can't she talk a little

slower? My head is still dizzy from trying to comprehend! Romeo and Juliette!

Supposedly the most tradgic romantic love story... or something like that."

"It is! How can you say it isn't romantic?" I looked at her in a puzzled

expression.

"Do you realize this whole play occurs within about four days! They meet, fall

in love, and die in FOUR whole days! And they're about our age to boot,

they're a couple of idiots if you ask me!"

"It isn't about that Tomoyo." I couldn't understand how she wouldn't think it

was a great love story. "It's about passion, being in the moment! Imagine you

were at this costume party. You hated it, you didn't even want to be there in

the first place."

"That would never happen, I'm a party animal!!" I just ignored her little side

comment and continued.

"And then," I stopped in the middle of the hallway and looked at her intently.

"You see this guy across the room. You don't know who he is but you want

to. And when your eyes meet and its like the room and everyone else in it

disappears. And the only thing you see is him and him staring right back at

you..." I stared off in the far distance imagining this happening to me and my

dream guy. If only he didn't hate me.

"Umm... yeah... really romantic. But they still kill themselves three days after

that." Tomyo put her arm around me lovingly and continued to walk to our

lockers. "I worry about you Sakura. I love you and everything but you're juss

plain weird."

"I'm not wierd, just a romantic."

"Oh hey! My mom brought back the latest fashions from her venture to Hong

Kong. Some of the stuff is pretty cute!" We finally reached our lockers and I

began to open it. "Want to come over and try some on?" I took out my

Geometry textbook and put it in my bag.

"I can't today." I said with disappointment. New clothes? Who could resist

that?

"You can keep what EVER you want!" I shook my head. "Do you have a date

or something?" I began to blush a bright pink. Just imagining myself with a

date with him made me want to vomit. That's when you know you really like

someone - vomit.

"No!" I said immediately. "It's nothing like that!" I began to back away from

her. "I have a tutor coming over that's all! He's not cute or anything AND I

DON'T have a huge crush on him! Well, I'll see you tomorrow! Bye!!" And with

that I began to run home.

"Yeah... okay then." Tomoyo stood there bewildered by her friend's weirdness.

I ran as fast as I could to get home early. I couldn't believe how obvious I

was! But my heart was beating a mile a minute when I thought she would find

out about my crush. Tomoyo, my best friend in the world, the one person who

I tell everything to... I haven't told her about my intense crush. Because she

hates him. For as long as I've known her she always has. And he hates me...

for whatever reason... What a messed up situation I was in. If she ever found

out I liked him I wouldn't know what she would do. I couldn't risk losing a

friend. But he hates me... I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing.

Good because I know I wouldn't have to risk Tomoyo's and I relationship. And

bad because I so desperately want to be with him. Either way I don't win, I

never win.

----

2 HOURS LATER...

'Gosh where is he?' I thought. I couldn't sit still, it felt like forever. I paced

back and forth my living room. Waiting for the doorbell to ring, maybe even

the phone. Anything would be fine! Just don't make me wait anymore, my

stomach is all tied up in knots. What if he was hurt trying to save a bus full of

orphans? He's so brave and everything he would always put other people

before him...

Ding Dong.

I held my breath. I've been anticipating this moment forever and here it is.

And I feel like vommiting again! Okay Sakura, just relax and don't puke on him.

That's the last thing you want to happen. I began to straighten out my

clothes then took a good glance at myself in the mirror. Ok Kinomoto, time to

look as cute as you can be.

Ding Dong.

I slowly place my hand on the knob and all at once turned it. But with all the

excitement and trying to look cute I opened the door way too fast!

"Hey--" THUD! "AHH!!" I screamed.

"Oh my god are you okay?"

I fell to the floor. It felt like the room was spinning out of control.

"Hey are you okay?!" His voice was filled with concern but at the same time I

could sense some amusement. 'Oh no' I thought. 'This CAN NOT be happening!

Tell me I just did not hit myself in the face with the door!'

"Looks like your door gave you a pretty bad bruising..." Gasp! I feel crying

but I can't since I can't even see straight. Suddenly I felt his arms pick me up

from the floor and carry me to another room.

"Wh-Where are we going?" He laid me on what felt like my couch as I heard

him walk back and close the front door. His footsteps were distinct as they

became louder as he came closer. I was somewhat afraid, I didn't know what

to expect. My vision started to become clear again as I somewhat began to

see the shape of his face. 'Oh, he's so hot!!' His face started to come closer

to mine.

'This is it!' I thought with much excitement. I closed my eyes and somewhat

puckered my lips. 5 seconds passed. I opened one eye lid to see what the

hold up was. My vision was finally clear and saw his face.

"AHH!" I screamed and he screamed in response.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" he looked at me like I was some psycho.

"What's wrong with me?! Why were you all up in my face, and just WHO are

you?!" I've never felt so violated in my entire life! To think I was about to let

HIM kiss me. He is known for only one thing in my school, and that's getting in

trouble.

"I was 'all up in your face' because I was juss checking up on that big bump

on your forehead, and secondly I'm your tutor..."

"What?!" I couldn't believe it. This punk is my tutor. "How can you be my

tutor? You hardly show up for school! And what happened to--?"

"Hey, just because I don't show up doesn't mean I don't know the material."

He stood up from the floor and towered over me. His dark brown eyes peirced

my own. He stared at me with such anger. "And that guy," his voice began to

calm down, "well who knows what happened to him. All I know is I'm your

tutor from now on."

"You?! I don't-- I refuse to believe it!"

"Well, that's just too bad. You MUST be preeeettttyyy stupid to have a tutor

like me. And it doesn't take a genius to figure that much out."

I glared at him with such content. Who does he think he is? Talking to me like

that. Only I could put myself down like that! But all I REALLY cared about

where he was. Why wasn't he my tutor? Does he hate me that much that he'd

send a guy like this to me?

"Hey, while I'm here I guess I could introduce myself." He walked over and sat

a couple of inches away from me. He looked at me with such a calm

complexion. "My name is Li, Syoaran Li."

"I'm Sakura Kinomoto..." I said in shock.

"Well, then I think we should get started." He picked up my Geometry book

from the coffee table and began to flip through it. "Besides, I get paid by the

hour."