Title: I Walk the Line
Series: First in the "After the Fall" series.
Author: Diva Stardust
Pairing: Dawn/Spike
Rating: R
Summary: Spike trains Dawn in the cemetery and finds his feelings for her starting to change. Post-"Lies My Parents Told Me".
Distribution: Just ask first if you want to archive this somewhere, please. I will most likely say yes!
Disclaimer: All characters belong to Joss Whedon, Marti Noxon, Mutant Enemy, UPN, FOX, etc. I'm not making any money off this.
Acknowledgements: Thanks to Spikeyvamp for the beta!
~*~*~*~*~
The cemetery was theirs for the night. Buffy had taken the potentials to a different graveyard that evening and Dawn was his.
"You know I really like training with you better than Buffy. So far you haven't done any who's got the power stuff," Dawn said while flipping a stake back and forth between her hands.
"What's that?" asked Spike, an eyebrow cocked in confusion.
"Oh, whenever Buffy would take me out patrolling she'd always go on and on with her speeches. You know the ones she does at the house? Well, imagine those only way smaller but still just as boring."
A small laugh left his mouth. "My condolences, Bit."
He watched her as she scanned the cemetery looking for anything suspicious. Now that he was trigger free Buffy had wanted him to train Dawn but he'd been hesitant at first. Seemed like something she should be doing, not him, but Buffy wanted her to be able to get the kind of one on one training that she couldn't give her anymore with the mess of potentials they had at the house. Spike hadn't bothered learning most of their names. Either more died each day or more arrived each day. Buffy had made it clear they were strictly her concern. He didn't like how she was trying to take on everything alone but she'd also made it clear that Dawn was who she wanted him to look out for now. When she told him that, it changed how he felt about training her. His promise from two years ago still meant everything to him. 'Til the end of the world.
She sat on the edge of a tombstone when she was certain there were no vamps around and stopped flipping her stake back and forth. Looked serious. "Why does Buffy want you to do this again? I know I put up a major fuss with her for a long time about wanting to go patrolling with her but now ... I'm research girl, Spike! I found my niche. I don't pine for being one of those girls anymore."
He sat down beside her. "Know that, Bit. 'S not like she wants you to go out patrolling alone. She just wants you to be able to handle yourself."
She nodded. "Okay, I get that. But I can totally handle myself."
He gave her a doubtful look and she sighed. "Okay, so I'm not quite there yet but I'm getting better, aren't I?"
"Every night you're getting better. Got good reflexes, you do."
He could tell she was trying to hide her happiness at his praise and smiled to himself. The first time he had taken her out here she had still hated him. Barely talked to him until he forced her to open up to him. Wanted her to put all her pain on him but she had only beaten small fists against his chest that felt as soft as cotton as she cried. It had started to rain and that's when she'd collapsed in his arms, her hair sticking to his shirt like glue. Their friendship was back where it used to be now, stronger even, but he was still worried about anything ruining it. He knew they were on shaky ground. Just the tiniest thing could throw everything off balance.
Spike remembered her earlier words. "Research girl. You planning on taking over Red's position? Want me to take care of her for you?" he teased.
"Hey, there can be two researchers, can't there? And I mean ... look at Willow now! She's gotten less scared about doing her magic AND she hasn't tried to kill me in like, a really long time. So there's less chance of her going all evil and veiny, right? She can handle the magic and I can handle the book stuff." Her eyes got a distant and thoughtful look to them. "There's this book I want to read when I get home ..."
"You mean you haven't studied *all* the ancient languages yet? I'm shocked!"
She laughed. "Everyone keeps teasing me about that! I don't care though; it's really fascinating stuff and comes in handy. I like being useful to the group."
"Yeah, I hear that, Bit." Spike was glad he had found his purpose again. Training Dawn was his job now. He had a reason for getting to live in their basement and drinking the blood that she would bring him after their training sessions. Was a hell of a lot more fun than being tortured by the First too.
He wasn't sure how much praise he should give her. Didn't want it to go to her head but he couldn't help himself. "I'm proud of you, Dawn. I've seen the way you devour those books Will gives you. You're a quick study the way you pick up everything so fast."
She looked down at the stake in her hands. "Thanks. She's been really good to me with all the stuff she's let me borrow. I think she's just excited about someone else being able to understand all the stuff she talks about all the time," she laughed.
"With your brains you should be able to go to one of the best universities in a few years."
"I wish! Could be kind of hard if I don't get a scholarship what with all our money going to repair the house after a bunch of eyeless freaks destroyed it and to a bunch of girls who don't even want to be here. They sure don't mind eating all my favorite cereal in the morning, though, do they?" she grumbled.
She paused and looked at him with a question lurking beneath her eyes. "Where did you go to school?"
Spike was taken aback by the question. No one ever bothered to remember that he had been human once, let alone could've actually been intelligent enough to have gone to a university. He was pretty certain most of that lot didn't bother to imagine he existed before he came to Sunnydale. But Dawn had always thought different he remembered. Always wanted to know more about him.
He told her about Cambridge and listened to the excited noises she made while she jumped off the tombstone and started walking animatedly in front of him. He laughed and took that to mean she'd been thinking about going there someday. As he watched her a thought crossed his mind. He would've loved spending time with Dawn when he was human. They were a lot alike. She wasn't meek like he'd been. She had a lot more guts, courage, and fire in her than he'd ever hoped of having back then but she went through books at the same speed he used to. Had that same love for learning. For wanting to know everything that was out there.
When he started picturing what Dawn would look like back then, in the dresses he was used to seeing women in, he stood up abruptly. Enough of this. Time to get down to business.
"Right, well, this jaunt down memory lane's been nice and all but what say you and me start what we came here for, alright?"
She looked disappointed but tried to hide it. Got into her fighting stance and held her stake tighter. "Sure. How should we start tonight?"
"Come at me," he growled.
She hesitated for a moment but then ran to him. But she was distracted and still thinking about the stories he'd told her. His fangs were inches away from her neck in a matter of seconds.
"You're dead, Dawn. Pay attention. You're distracted right now. Focus."
She took a breath and he let her go. "Start walking over there, pet. I'll attack when you least expect it. Remember; be on your guard at all times."
He watched as she walked away from him and tried to get into predator mode. It wasn't a very difficult thing to do. He went in the opposite direction she was going in. Wanted to come at her from the front. See how well she'd handle walking right into a trap.
She didn't jump or flinch when they finally met up. He was glad of that but she still didn't have the strength she needed even though the agility was there. After a quick tussle where he at least wasn't able to knock the stake out of her hands, he had her pinned to the ground.
Her efforts to knock him off her were useless and he could see her beginning to give up. "Don't give up, girl! This is your bloody life on the line!"
Looking down at her a flood of memories came back to him. Killing girls Dawn's age exactly like this. Keeping the bloodlust under control was still so hard for him. Probably always would be. There were so many times during the day that he felt like choking the life out of one of the potentials for something annoying they would do or say. He never wanted to think about Dawn like that, though, and loosened his grip on her. She kicked him off her and even though it didn't have the kind of power that would usually get him off a victim he landed on the ground anyways.
She straddled him and poised the stake over his heart. "How's that?"
His mind was racing. Suddenly realized it wasn't right for them to be in this position, not at all. Never mind the bloody training; she was right on top of him. Could hear how hard she was breathing and how fast her heart was beating from all the adrenaline and he needed to get her off him right the hell now.
"Good. Good work. You can get off me now."
She stood up and wiped the dirt off her pants. He did the same and tried not to look at her. "Right, well I think that was enough for tonight."
She looked confused. "Really? We usually train for longer than this."
"Yeah, know we do, but best to leave on a high note. That way you'll have more confidence tomorrow night."
Dawn seemed satisfied by that excuse. "Okay."
As they made their way through the row of graves Spike was distracted. He never saw, let alone sensed, the vampire that came out of nowhere and as quick as a bolt of lightning had Dawn by the throat.
The stake was knocked out of her hand and Spike could see the panic all over her face. Everything he had tried to teach her was being forgotten in just a handful of seconds.
The vampire brought his fangs down to her neck and Dawn screamed when he bit her.
"Don't you fucking touch her," he growled. Suddenly there was only dust as Spike's hands were on him instantly, pulling him off her and snapping his neck.
The scared look was still on her face as she brought her hand to her neck. "Spike, I'm bleeding," she said quietly.
Everything came full circle.
Dawn standing on the tower. That desperate look in her eyes because she knows she's going to lose him. That she's going to get cut, going to bleed everywhere. And it's because of him. All his fault.
"Not going to let you bleed, Sweet Bit."
His mouth was on the wound before she could say anything in return. Licking it gently while also applying pressure with his lips to stop the blood from flowing. Needed to make it stop. The taste of her was making him dizzy. She tasted like something powerful, ancient, magic older than time. But also sweet and girlish as well. It was a heady mixture.
He remembered being at the hospital with her after the fall. Not even being concerned about his own injuries, thinking only of her. Those slices that bastard had made to her sides trying to open her up for that fucking ritual. He'd called her his brave girl and watched while the doctors bandaged her up, eventually forcing them to let him do it because he knew they weren't doing a good enough job. He knew she still had the scars too. She used to tell him how ashamed of them she was, how she was never going to be able to wear a bikini when all the other girls her age would.
His arms held her against him, fierce and protective while his mouth continued on. He'd never felt so possessive before. Wanted to fall to his knees and kiss those scars that brought her so much pain. Make everything better for her. Let his kisses beg for her forgiveness.
Spike stopped suddenly when he heard a very tiny noise slip out of Dawn's mouth. A moan.
There was a line that he was dangerously close to crossing right now.
He knew he couldn't let that happen. He looked at the wound again. "The bleeding's stopped. Best get you home and bandaged up."
"Thanks," she said.
As they walked back home he shoved his hands into his coat pockets so she wouldn't be able to see them shaking.
Series: First in the "After the Fall" series.
Author: Diva Stardust
Pairing: Dawn/Spike
Rating: R
Summary: Spike trains Dawn in the cemetery and finds his feelings for her starting to change. Post-"Lies My Parents Told Me".
Distribution: Just ask first if you want to archive this somewhere, please. I will most likely say yes!
Disclaimer: All characters belong to Joss Whedon, Marti Noxon, Mutant Enemy, UPN, FOX, etc. I'm not making any money off this.
Acknowledgements: Thanks to Spikeyvamp for the beta!
~*~*~*~*~
The cemetery was theirs for the night. Buffy had taken the potentials to a different graveyard that evening and Dawn was his.
"You know I really like training with you better than Buffy. So far you haven't done any who's got the power stuff," Dawn said while flipping a stake back and forth between her hands.
"What's that?" asked Spike, an eyebrow cocked in confusion.
"Oh, whenever Buffy would take me out patrolling she'd always go on and on with her speeches. You know the ones she does at the house? Well, imagine those only way smaller but still just as boring."
A small laugh left his mouth. "My condolences, Bit."
He watched her as she scanned the cemetery looking for anything suspicious. Now that he was trigger free Buffy had wanted him to train Dawn but he'd been hesitant at first. Seemed like something she should be doing, not him, but Buffy wanted her to be able to get the kind of one on one training that she couldn't give her anymore with the mess of potentials they had at the house. Spike hadn't bothered learning most of their names. Either more died each day or more arrived each day. Buffy had made it clear they were strictly her concern. He didn't like how she was trying to take on everything alone but she'd also made it clear that Dawn was who she wanted him to look out for now. When she told him that, it changed how he felt about training her. His promise from two years ago still meant everything to him. 'Til the end of the world.
She sat on the edge of a tombstone when she was certain there were no vamps around and stopped flipping her stake back and forth. Looked serious. "Why does Buffy want you to do this again? I know I put up a major fuss with her for a long time about wanting to go patrolling with her but now ... I'm research girl, Spike! I found my niche. I don't pine for being one of those girls anymore."
He sat down beside her. "Know that, Bit. 'S not like she wants you to go out patrolling alone. She just wants you to be able to handle yourself."
She nodded. "Okay, I get that. But I can totally handle myself."
He gave her a doubtful look and she sighed. "Okay, so I'm not quite there yet but I'm getting better, aren't I?"
"Every night you're getting better. Got good reflexes, you do."
He could tell she was trying to hide her happiness at his praise and smiled to himself. The first time he had taken her out here she had still hated him. Barely talked to him until he forced her to open up to him. Wanted her to put all her pain on him but she had only beaten small fists against his chest that felt as soft as cotton as she cried. It had started to rain and that's when she'd collapsed in his arms, her hair sticking to his shirt like glue. Their friendship was back where it used to be now, stronger even, but he was still worried about anything ruining it. He knew they were on shaky ground. Just the tiniest thing could throw everything off balance.
Spike remembered her earlier words. "Research girl. You planning on taking over Red's position? Want me to take care of her for you?" he teased.
"Hey, there can be two researchers, can't there? And I mean ... look at Willow now! She's gotten less scared about doing her magic AND she hasn't tried to kill me in like, a really long time. So there's less chance of her going all evil and veiny, right? She can handle the magic and I can handle the book stuff." Her eyes got a distant and thoughtful look to them. "There's this book I want to read when I get home ..."
"You mean you haven't studied *all* the ancient languages yet? I'm shocked!"
She laughed. "Everyone keeps teasing me about that! I don't care though; it's really fascinating stuff and comes in handy. I like being useful to the group."
"Yeah, I hear that, Bit." Spike was glad he had found his purpose again. Training Dawn was his job now. He had a reason for getting to live in their basement and drinking the blood that she would bring him after their training sessions. Was a hell of a lot more fun than being tortured by the First too.
He wasn't sure how much praise he should give her. Didn't want it to go to her head but he couldn't help himself. "I'm proud of you, Dawn. I've seen the way you devour those books Will gives you. You're a quick study the way you pick up everything so fast."
She looked down at the stake in her hands. "Thanks. She's been really good to me with all the stuff she's let me borrow. I think she's just excited about someone else being able to understand all the stuff she talks about all the time," she laughed.
"With your brains you should be able to go to one of the best universities in a few years."
"I wish! Could be kind of hard if I don't get a scholarship what with all our money going to repair the house after a bunch of eyeless freaks destroyed it and to a bunch of girls who don't even want to be here. They sure don't mind eating all my favorite cereal in the morning, though, do they?" she grumbled.
She paused and looked at him with a question lurking beneath her eyes. "Where did you go to school?"
Spike was taken aback by the question. No one ever bothered to remember that he had been human once, let alone could've actually been intelligent enough to have gone to a university. He was pretty certain most of that lot didn't bother to imagine he existed before he came to Sunnydale. But Dawn had always thought different he remembered. Always wanted to know more about him.
He told her about Cambridge and listened to the excited noises she made while she jumped off the tombstone and started walking animatedly in front of him. He laughed and took that to mean she'd been thinking about going there someday. As he watched her a thought crossed his mind. He would've loved spending time with Dawn when he was human. They were a lot alike. She wasn't meek like he'd been. She had a lot more guts, courage, and fire in her than he'd ever hoped of having back then but she went through books at the same speed he used to. Had that same love for learning. For wanting to know everything that was out there.
When he started picturing what Dawn would look like back then, in the dresses he was used to seeing women in, he stood up abruptly. Enough of this. Time to get down to business.
"Right, well, this jaunt down memory lane's been nice and all but what say you and me start what we came here for, alright?"
She looked disappointed but tried to hide it. Got into her fighting stance and held her stake tighter. "Sure. How should we start tonight?"
"Come at me," he growled.
She hesitated for a moment but then ran to him. But she was distracted and still thinking about the stories he'd told her. His fangs were inches away from her neck in a matter of seconds.
"You're dead, Dawn. Pay attention. You're distracted right now. Focus."
She took a breath and he let her go. "Start walking over there, pet. I'll attack when you least expect it. Remember; be on your guard at all times."
He watched as she walked away from him and tried to get into predator mode. It wasn't a very difficult thing to do. He went in the opposite direction she was going in. Wanted to come at her from the front. See how well she'd handle walking right into a trap.
She didn't jump or flinch when they finally met up. He was glad of that but she still didn't have the strength she needed even though the agility was there. After a quick tussle where he at least wasn't able to knock the stake out of her hands, he had her pinned to the ground.
Her efforts to knock him off her were useless and he could see her beginning to give up. "Don't give up, girl! This is your bloody life on the line!"
Looking down at her a flood of memories came back to him. Killing girls Dawn's age exactly like this. Keeping the bloodlust under control was still so hard for him. Probably always would be. There were so many times during the day that he felt like choking the life out of one of the potentials for something annoying they would do or say. He never wanted to think about Dawn like that, though, and loosened his grip on her. She kicked him off her and even though it didn't have the kind of power that would usually get him off a victim he landed on the ground anyways.
She straddled him and poised the stake over his heart. "How's that?"
His mind was racing. Suddenly realized it wasn't right for them to be in this position, not at all. Never mind the bloody training; she was right on top of him. Could hear how hard she was breathing and how fast her heart was beating from all the adrenaline and he needed to get her off him right the hell now.
"Good. Good work. You can get off me now."
She stood up and wiped the dirt off her pants. He did the same and tried not to look at her. "Right, well I think that was enough for tonight."
She looked confused. "Really? We usually train for longer than this."
"Yeah, know we do, but best to leave on a high note. That way you'll have more confidence tomorrow night."
Dawn seemed satisfied by that excuse. "Okay."
As they made their way through the row of graves Spike was distracted. He never saw, let alone sensed, the vampire that came out of nowhere and as quick as a bolt of lightning had Dawn by the throat.
The stake was knocked out of her hand and Spike could see the panic all over her face. Everything he had tried to teach her was being forgotten in just a handful of seconds.
The vampire brought his fangs down to her neck and Dawn screamed when he bit her.
"Don't you fucking touch her," he growled. Suddenly there was only dust as Spike's hands were on him instantly, pulling him off her and snapping his neck.
The scared look was still on her face as she brought her hand to her neck. "Spike, I'm bleeding," she said quietly.
Everything came full circle.
Dawn standing on the tower. That desperate look in her eyes because she knows she's going to lose him. That she's going to get cut, going to bleed everywhere. And it's because of him. All his fault.
"Not going to let you bleed, Sweet Bit."
His mouth was on the wound before she could say anything in return. Licking it gently while also applying pressure with his lips to stop the blood from flowing. Needed to make it stop. The taste of her was making him dizzy. She tasted like something powerful, ancient, magic older than time. But also sweet and girlish as well. It was a heady mixture.
He remembered being at the hospital with her after the fall. Not even being concerned about his own injuries, thinking only of her. Those slices that bastard had made to her sides trying to open her up for that fucking ritual. He'd called her his brave girl and watched while the doctors bandaged her up, eventually forcing them to let him do it because he knew they weren't doing a good enough job. He knew she still had the scars too. She used to tell him how ashamed of them she was, how she was never going to be able to wear a bikini when all the other girls her age would.
His arms held her against him, fierce and protective while his mouth continued on. He'd never felt so possessive before. Wanted to fall to his knees and kiss those scars that brought her so much pain. Make everything better for her. Let his kisses beg for her forgiveness.
Spike stopped suddenly when he heard a very tiny noise slip out of Dawn's mouth. A moan.
There was a line that he was dangerously close to crossing right now.
He knew he couldn't let that happen. He looked at the wound again. "The bleeding's stopped. Best get you home and bandaged up."
"Thanks," she said.
As they walked back home he shoved his hands into his coat pockets so she wouldn't be able to see them shaking.