Chapter One: Supergirl to the Rescue, Matrix Style!
Neo sat at the terminal, typing away. He yawned and looked at the clock.
Yikes! It's one o' clock already! Way past my bedtime! Trin's gonna beat me again.
Neo couldn't help it. He had met this girl on the internet, and she was fascinating. They talked for hours, flirted, exchanged pics, and she was hot.
hotnsexyrebel92: What is the Matrix, Neo?
Neo sighed. She typed perfectly, too. She was perfect!
misteranderson85: it's a computer generated dream world
He hit enter and waited breathlessly for her reply.
hotnsexyrebel92: Oh, okay. I get it. So can you unplug me?
misteranderson85: how do you know about that
hotnsexyrebel92: Oh, I have clairvoyant powers. I'm supposed to be the next Oracle, after all.
misteranderon85: lol
hotnsexyrebel92: I've got to go, my dad and I are going to the mountains.
misteranderson85: i love you
hotnsexyrebel92: That is nice, but I already have a boyfriend…two actually. The Twins. Bye.
***hotnsexyrebel92 has signed off***
***twin has entered the chatroom***
***twin has entered the chatroom***
twin: hands off our girl, neo
twin: yea
misteranderson85: so you wanna fight?
***twin's warning level has increased to 10 percent***
twin: we owe you for that
twin: just like new
***twin's warning level has decreased to 0 percent***
misteranderson85: that's a neat trick
***twin's warning level has increased to 20 percent***
twin: we are getting aggravated
twin: yes, we are
***twin has left the chatroom***
***twin has left the chatroom***
***agentjackson has entered the chatroom***
***agentjohnson has entered the chatroom***
***agentthree has entered the chatroom***
***johndoe has entered the chatroom***
agentjackson: it is the anomaly
agentjohnson: let's get him
***misteranderson85's warning level has been raised to 10 percent***
***misteranderson85's warning level has been raised to 20 percent***
***misteranderson85's warning level has been raised to 30 percent***
***agentjackson's warning level has been raised to 100 percent***
***agentjohnsons's warning level has been raised to 100 percent***
johndoe: mister anderson
misteranderson85: yes?
johndoe: why do you keep fighting?
misteranderson85: nothing better to do
***johndoe has set agentjohnson to johndoe***
***johndoe has set agentjackson to johndoe***
***johndoe has set agentthree to johndoe***
misteranderson85: this is getting weird
***superasian has entered the chatroom***
superasian: whassup? tHe 0rac1e, sh3 l1k3 t0ta11y wAn1s to s33 yu0!
misteranderson85: goodbye
***misteranderson85 has left the chatroom***
Neo started playing Snood, but quickly lost. He swore and hit the keyboard. Morpheus stuck his head into the core.
"Neo, some of us are trying to sleep."
"Sorry, Morpheus."
Trinity walked into the room.
"Neo, I love you. I made you some breakfast. Here."
She gave him a plate of eggs. Having filled her one mandatory appearance in the Mary Sue fic, she quickly faded away.
Neo gobbled his eggs. They were delicious, but he knew "hotnsexyrebel92" would have made even tastier ones.
"Morpheus?"
"Chew your food, Neo."
Neo swallowed. "Sorry. I think we need to go into the Matrix."
Neo, Morpheus, and Cypher were inside the Matrix.
"I thought you were dead," Neo said to Cypher.
"No," Cypher said.
"Okay," Neo said, shrugging. The three got on a motorcycle and went to the mountains. Morpheus drove, and Cypher sat in the little side cart. Neo sat behind Morpheus, even though he could fly.
"I'm feeling sick," he explained. Then he suddenly collapsed. Morpheus shrugged and kept driving.
They got to "hotnsexyrebel92's" vacation house. Morpheus walked in and sat down in the chair while Cypher explained the Matrix to her and her father, who was wearing a suit and sunglass, an earpiece radio, and spoke with a strange accent.
"The Matrix is like…dude…like, a trip man, you know? It's like…wow…"
The father nodded in understanding.
"Totally, dude."
They embraced and went into the back room together.
Neo came in the room, holding his head.
"What happened to your mysterious illness?" Morpheus asked.
"It mysteriously vanished," Neo explained.
"I see," said Morpheus, nodding sagely.
Aphrodite sat down across from Morpheus.
"Take the red pill and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes," Morpheus said.
Aphrodite thought for a moment, then shrugged, changed into a dragon, and took the red pill.
It had been one week since Aphrodite had been unplugged. She had trained for twenty hours straight, made the jump on her first try, knocked Morpheus out during training, almost killing him, beat Neo several times, been promoted to Captain, stopped Sentinels with her bare hands, killed seventeen Agents with a slingshot, and beat Trinity senseless in the showers.
She even made better eggs.
Neo wondered vaguely where Trinity had gone, and what had happened to Cypher. But right now he was busy, researching Aphrodite as she went into the Matrix to see the Oracle. He watched every move of her body. He was in luv!
Morpheus led Aphrodite into the Oracle's apartment.
"I can only show you the door, you have to open it yourself."
"Why?"
"The knob is loose, and I've never figured it out."
Aphrodite shrugged and opened the door. A little bald kid walked over to her.
"Do not try to bend the spoon, that is – "
The kid yelped as the spoon broke in half in his hands. He started crying. Aphrodite wailed at the suffering of another human program being thingy. She started singing, and her beautiful voice quieted the child.
The Oracle came out and led her into a kitchen. Aphrodite nodded and took a cookie.
"Thanks. What vase?"
She turned around and accidentally knocked a vase over. She quickly snatched it up and hung it from her nose while balancing on a one-footed unicycle.
The Oracle opened her mouth.
"I know I'm the One. Who likes me? Oh, Neo? Okay. Yes, I do have a light."
She lit the Oracle's cigarette for her and lit one for herself.
"Cypher's going to betray us? Okay."
The Oracle sighed.
"Goodbye. Hey! That's not very nice!"
It was a disaster.
Cypher had betrayed them all, and Morpheus had been captured. Neo had jacked in to help and been struck down by an Agent. Aphrodite cradled him in her arms while fighting off twenty Agents with a plastic spoon.
Soon all the Agents were dead. Aphrodite walked into the office building and started shooting guards. They all opened up on her, but she started shining with a bright, pure light, and they fell to the floor and killed themselves, ashamed of wanting to harm something so beautiful.
Neo looked at her in admiration. "I love you."
"That's nice, but if we got together it would just hurt you more when I martyr myself."
Neo nodded and they climbed into the elevator together. Neo suddenly was overwhelmed with desire and tried to kiss her, but she pushed him back.
"What about Trinity?" she asked.
"I don't care about her! I luv you!"
"No, you love Trinity. You're just overwhelmed by my perfection."
"No, I really luv you!"
They had finally rescued Morpheus. He went to the phone and got out. Then Agent Smith appeared and destroyed the phone, instead of shooting Neo and Aphrodite.
"Mister Anderson, we meet for the first time for the last time."
"Smith!"
"Daddy!"
Aphrodite rushed into Smith's arms. Suddenly, Neo's phone rang.
"Neo, I found out Aphrodite's real name!"
"Tank, aren't you dead?"
"No. It's Corinne Anderson!"
"Wha????"
"Yea, I know! You're sister!"
"But…Smith is her father!"
"That must mean…"
Smith came over.
"No, you killed my father!" Neo yells.
"I am your father!"
"No!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Suddenly, Neo's daughter appeared from no where.
"How'd you get here?" Neo asked. "My daughter is
a freeborn! She can't jack in!"
"Oh, I went to get plugs from the machines or some such shit like
that."
She and Aphrodite killed Smith. Then they both blacked out. They woke up in a clean world with a bright blue sky filled with happily dancing butterflies and dears.
"What happened?" they both asked.
"Your noble sacrifice convinced the machines and humans to put aside their differences," Morpheus explained. "And Smith became human! He and Neo are playing catch with a Sentinel's head."
Aphrodite and Salmonella walked over to a field filled with flowers. They laughed and hugged their respective fathers and brothers. Everyone was one big happy family.
But on the horizon was looming a dark danger, for the reign of the Sues was about to come to a crashing end.
For Gary Stu was on his way!