Assume

Author: Adrienne Wolter (catsncritters)
Summary: Trinity muses about Neo and Agent Smith. One-shot.
Rating: PG
Warnings: implied slash/yaoi, between Neo and Agent Smith. If you don't know what slash is, you probably don't want to read this.
Reviews: are appreciated, but not required.

He thinks he loves me. It makes me smile in a sad sort of way, sometimes, when I am falling asleep next to him at night. He would never intentionally hurt me. And in a way, he does love me–as a trusted friend, someone to confide thoughts in when he worries. He worries a lot. Anyone would, if they were thrust into such an important position.

I love him more than as a friend. I have loved him for a very long time, since when he first became a member of the crew on the Neb. I was the first to know he was the One. Because I love him.

But even if doesn't know it, his affections are elsewhere. He doesn't realize it, but I can see this. I don't know why I don't feel very upset at this at all... just a little queasy and very tired, when the thoughts come to mind. It's a sort of resignation, knowing that I have played my part in his fate, and now his fate belongs to the one he is slowly falling for.

I worry about him more and more though. His love will blind him, warp the truth. His love can never be requited, because he is falling in love with an empty shell. Artificial intelligence. An agent. Smith will forever be his enemy, no matter how obvious or not he is with his love for the man. Because artificial intelligence cannot love.

Or that is what I tell myself. Morpheus once told me what Smith told him when he captured him. He told Morpheus that humans found reality through misery. I'm beginning to think he is right. I may be looking down at this because I really don't know. You can't know what goes on in someone's head.

Smith is different. He is independent of the Matrix, he despises the smell of humans–something I'm sure the other agents don't even pick up on–and he has more human qualities than the other agents. Sometimes, when deep in thought, I realize something extraordinary that almost makes me understand why Neo would choose Smith over anyone else... and then I lose that moment of understanding, and just get really confused. Again.

I do not understand, Neo. I do not understand.

The Oracle had told me that I would fall in love with the One. She was right. She's always right.

But she'd never guaranteed that he would always love me. And I took it for granted.

In the real world, you should never assume. If you are higher up and trip, you fall further.