Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in this story, but I do own the story. If it resembles anyone else's in any way, it is unintentional.
Author's Note: Well, I was wrong last chapter. There will not be two more chapters; this will be the last one. I'm really glad you all have enjoyed this as much as you have and I hope this conclusion will be a satisfying one. As always, a longer author's note at the end, so enjoy! =)
Rogue stared for what felt like forever at Kurt's immobile form. Slowly, cautiously, she reached forward and brushed some of his hair out of his face. He did not appear to be breathing. *Oh, God, no...* she thought panickedly.
"Kurt?" she said. "Are you all right?" He didn't stir. *Oh, God, he's dead! I killed my brother!* Rogue was in a rather irrational state of mind at the moment. She was so desperate for Kurt to be okay, and so incredulous that her plan had actually worked, that she was jumping to conclusions hardly two minutes after it had all happened.
"I must admit to you that I am somehow surprised."
Rogue jumped. Looking up, she saw a sight that almost made her scream. Standing barely ten feet in front of her was an enormous monster, eyes red, skin red, dark hair, which must have been at least eight feet tall. It didn't even take her half a second to figure out who it must be.
Upon seeing the fear in Rogue's eyes, Azazel grinned. "You have been quite the annoyance to me throughout this entire ordeal." It made Rogue shudder to hear how deep his voice was. "You just couldn't help getting involved, could you? You set me back a considerable amount of time. And now look what you've done. You've ruined it. You've ruined everything."
"What do you want?" Rogue asked, fighting to keep the fear out of her voice. She held Kurt's head in her lap protectively, eyeing Azazel as if just daring him to come any closer.
"Nothing from you. And I no longer want anything of my son there, either. You see, Kurt has always had a demon inside him, a much more powerful form than his rather useless human one. I came to release it, so that he might be of some use to me."
Rogue froze. She couldn't have heard him right. "Wait...did you just say...Kurt was your SON?"
"I did. But quite a useless one in the state he was in. Everything was going quite well until you intervened. Now thanks to you, he will forever remain this weak, worthless human that I am ashamed to call my son."
"He ain't weak and he ain't worthless, ya creep!" Rogue shouted angrily. "Look, if you're not going to bother Kurt anymore, then get outta here and leave us alone!!!"
Azazel smirked at her. "Of course I'm not going to bother you anymore. I came here for my demon son and you have destroyed him. What makes you think I want him now?"
Rogue did not reply. She only glared at him as if he would shrink back if she put enough hatred into it. Azazel's somehow satisfied expression did not change. He laughed and said, "It would be terribly ironic if you went through all that trouble and he didn't survive. I'm not so sure that he did, you know; I WAS awfully close to finishing him when he left." He laughed again once he saw fear jump into Rogue's eyes.
"Enjoy the corpse." And with a teleport that strongly resembled Kurt's, Azazel was gone.
Overwhelmed with anger, Rogue shouted at the lingering cloud the most vulgar and foul things her mind could come up with in its irrational, fearful state. She screamed all the offensive things she knew until long after Azazel's cloud had disappeared. Even then, she didn't know for how long she had gone on. After her anger was somewhat spent, she turned back to her still unconscious brother, half believing him to be dead.
"Kurt," she said, fighting not to lose hope after finally getting him back. "Come on, Kurt. If you're playing one of your stupid jokes then it's not funny. I know that jerk's a liar, I know you're not really dead, but the least you could do is breathe, dammit!!"
Rogue heard the grass rustle and looked up. Logan and the professor were standing over her, both looking concerned, both unaware of what exactly was happening. The two of them had regained consciousness not long ago and came to see what was going on.
"Is the elf all right?" Logan asked, his eyes looking somewhat tense.
"Logan, I don't know if he's alive or what, please do something!"
"He's not dead, Rogue," Professor X assured her calmly. "Your success was extremely fortunate."
"Elf?" Logan said, nudging him. "Come on now, don't do this."
"Kurt!!" Rogue shouted, beginning to panic. If Kurt was indeed alive, then that was all well and good, but what if he was in some sort of coma? Rogue's mind could not settle on one thought.
But at the sound of her yell, Kurt noticeably cringed. "I'm avake, Rogue," he said almost inaudibly.
Yes! He was alive! Azazel hadn't killed him! Rogue felt triumphantly victorious and was too delighted for words.
"Stop yelling..." Kurt said, "...I just don't feel like talking right now."
Rogue suddenly felt a pang of guilt. Why hadn't she thought of that earlier? He had just been too tired to reply to her, that was all it had been.
"I'm sorry...you don't have to do anything, Kurt, I'm sorry," she apologized quickly.
Kurt looked around and saw Wolverine and the professor. To his horror, that was all he saw. Where were the other X-Men? What had happened to them? "Rogue...did I kill anyvun? Vhere is everybody?"
"They're fine, Kurt, don't worry about it. Don't worry, you can close your eyes, it's over now."
***
Kurt had heard Rogue's voice deep inside those endless flames; he remembered why he used to say that prayer almost every night. He'd resisted Azazel, resisted the demon, and was able to finally drive it out. He remembered a feeling like teleporting, and the next thing Kurt saw was the sky as he was lying on the institute grounds, looking up. The fatigue and weakness at that point was overwhelming, and Kurt had fallen instantly asleep.
However, he was unpleasantly awakened by the frantic yells of Rogue not long afterward. But he was so tired...he couldn't even think straight enough to realize that she would think he was dead if he didn't say something. But after he had drifted off to sleep and been awakened a second time, he finally asked her to stop shouting. She'd respected his wish and Kurt next awoke in his own bed.
***
For the next week nobody saw much of Kurt. He spent most of his time sleeping, occasionally wandering into the kitchen to get something to eat, but never saying a word to anybody. He avoided eye contact with any of the other X-Men as well. For the most part nobody gave him a hard time about it. They could understand that he probably needed some time to himself after all that had happened. But after a while, Rogue felt like she needed to confront him. After all, she hadn't exactly gotten over the events of Kurt's possession either.
One night before dinner, she and the other X-Men, minus Kurt of course, were sitting at the table doing homework like usual. For the first day or two after Kurt had gone back to normal, there had been little or no conversation among them during this time. But lately, things were beginning to stray in a more casual direction, and even a normal conversation was being had around the table.
Rogue stood up and began to walk out of the room. "Hey Rogue," Kitty called, "where're you going?"
"Oh...I'm just gonna see if Kurt wants to have dinner with us tonight," she replied.
"Oh." There was a short uneasy pause between them. "Well..." Kitty finally said, "tell him I hope he comes."
"I will." And Rogue left the room.
Once upstairs, she found that there was no light coming from underneath Kurt's door. He must be sleeping again. She lifted her hand to knock, but then decided that there really was no point. She was going to talk to him no matter what. So, as quietly as she could, Rogue opened the door and let herself in.
"Is that you, Rogue?" came a mildly tired voice from the bed.
"Yeah, it's me," she replied, not bothering to close the door all the way in order to let in some light.
"I vas hoping it might be you." Kurt pushed the covers off him and sat up. Rogue walked over to the bedside.
"You been having any nightmares or anything lately? Just out of curiosity."
"Dreamless."
"That's good," she replied, smiling. She took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. "So...do you feel any better?"
"I don't really know. I don't even know vhat happened."
"What do you mean?"
He didn't say anything for a while, obviously thinking deeply about something. "I just...he vas making me forget everything...and I...sort of remember some of the things that happened after that, but not really...and then I voke up and you vere there, and I thought I'd killed everybody else."
"I told you, Kurt...you didn't kill anybody," she told him in her most reassuring voice.
"I know."
Rogue was silent herself for a moment then. "Well...what DO you remember? Anything?"
He nodded, slowly. "I remember he told me he vas the devil...and I remember fire...and I remember you saying that psalm to me. That's about the best thing I remember about it all."
"That's all? You don't remember anything else?"
He paused before shaking his head no.
So he didn't know that he was Azazel's son. Of course, Rogue didn't know if he had ever told Kurt, but it didn't matter. He didn't remember. She figured it best not to tell him. It was probably the last thing Kurt ever needed to hear.
"How did you know that psalm, anyvay?" Kurt asked.
"Well...I touched you, the demon I mean, and it was the only thing out of you that I got. I figured it would help bring you back. And I guess it did."
Kurt sighed distractedly. "I used to say it all the time. Vhen I vas little...."
"Um...do you mind me asking why? I mean...what does it mean, exactly?"
Kurt shook his head to say no, he did not mind. "It means...that your life can be horrible, you can be overvhelmed by all your sorrow and everything else, but it doesn't matter, because God vill alvays be merciful to you. All you have to do is ask for it."
There was a short silence. "And it helped?"
"Nothing else really did. Especially after they'd been chasing me all night......it made me feel better."
They stayed there for a moment in silence. Kurt was not looking at her, rather staring straight ahead. Rogue saw the look on his face and could tell that something was still bothering him. "Kurt," she said softly, sitting on the edge of his bed, "what are you still so afraid of, huh? He's never coming back here again, you know that, right?"
He looked her full in the face, no expression there besides exhaustion. There was a silence, one like all the others that had passed in their conversation thus far. He'd stayed quiet in order to think about what he was going to say next. "I'm afraid of vhat I did," he finally said. "Vhat I did...here. To all of you."
Rogue felt like she should be tired of telling him this, but oddly enough it didn't bother her in the least. "You didn't kill anybody, Kurt. You didn't even hurt anybody that badly. Matter of fact, it wasn't even really you."
He blinked once, slowly. "Vhat did I do, then?"
Rogue realized now that nobody had ever told him what happened while the demon was running rampant in the institute. He'd never asked up till now, and no one had ever really gotten the chance to tell him. They probably didn't even want to tell him.
"Well..." she started out slowly, "the demon was running around for about an hour, prob'ly longer. And he did a lot less damage than he was aiming to, you know. A lot less."
"Rogue..." Kurt said in a way that almost sounded exasperated. "Just tell me vhat I did. I vant to know."
Rogue sighed. She might as well tell him if he wanted to know so much. Even though she hadn't been around for most of the demon's attacks, she had found out about them after seeing the others' injuries. So she told Kurt about the demon biting Jean, stabbing Evan, shattering Scott's visor, and all the other things he'd done to them. But she also added, with extra emphasis, all the times they'd escaped the demon's violence. She even told him about how Logan was able to attack the demon and cut its face.
"He did that?" Kurt asked, curiously feeling his face for signs of a cut or scar. "But...there's nothing here."
"That's 'cause it wasn't you, it was that demon."
"Oh...." Rogue waited a minute or two before realizing that he was not going to say anything else.
"Well, is there anything you need?" she asked hopefully, not liking to see him so depressed over something that was never even his fault.
"No, Rogue. Thank you."
Rogue sighed and stood up. "All right." She walked towards the door and suddenly stopped. "Just so you know," she said, "Kitty and I have been eating your dessert every night." And she left.
Kurt sat in bed for a while after she left. It wasn't like he was being stubborn, or like he enjoyed being depressed and isolated, he was just confused. And even though Rogue was being extremely helpful, she couldn't give him the satisfaction of knowing the one thing that was driving him crazy.
No matter how many times he ran it over in his head, there were only a limited amount of things he remembered from a week ago. He remembered the entire morning of that day, the voices and the pain that the voice had brought Kurt when he tried to make it all go away himself. He could recall attacking Rogue the first time, momentarily forgetting all about her. And from there things started to fade. From then on all he had were little flashes of remembrance of seemingly random things. Kurt remembered fire, endless fire everywhere, like the first night. He could recall some other pain, brought to him for some unknown reason, and then of course there was the revelation of the identity of that maddening voice. Kurt had tried so hard to remember even this much that he wasn't sure what was true and what he had made up just for satisfaction.
But by far the thing he remembered best was hearing Rogue's voice saying that psalm to him. He doubted that he would have ever been free of that monster were it not for her.
Tired with thinking for the moment, Kurt reached across to his table and picked up his Bible. He idly flipped through it, looking for nothing in particular to read. He stopped at a random page, which happened to be the Gospel of Mark. His eyes fell on a random passage and he simply began to read:
~~~
When they came to the other disciples, they saw a large crowd around them and the teachers of the law arguing with them. As soon as the people saw Jesus, they were overwhelmed with wonder and ran to greet him.
"What are you arguing with them about?" he asked.
A man in the crowd answered, "Teacher, I brought you my son, who is possessed by a spirit that has robbed him of speech. Whenever it seizes him, it throws him to the ground. He foams at the mouth, gnashes his teeth and becomes rigid. I asked your disciples to drive out the spirit, but they could not."
"O unbelieving generation," Jesus replied, "how long shall I stay with you? How long shall I put up with you? Bring the boy to me."
So they brought him. When the spirit saw Jesus, it immediately threw the boy into a convulsion. He fell to the ground and rolled around, foaming at the mouth.
Jesus asked the boy's father, "How long has he been like this?"
"From childhood," he answered. "It has often thrown him into fire or water to kill him. But if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us."
"'If you can'?" said Jesus. "Everything is possible for him who believes."
Immediately the boy's father exclaimed, "I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!"
When Jesus saw that a crowd was running to the scene, he rebuked the evil spirit. "You deaf and mute spirit," he said, "I command you, come out of him and never enter him again."
The spirit shrieked, convulsed him violently and came out. The boy looked so much like a corpse that many said, "He's dead."
But Jesus took him by the hand and lifted him to his feet, and he stood up.
~~~
Kurt stopped reading. He was shocked. That passage sounded almost exactly like what had happened to him. He read it again to make sure he wasn't just making it up. No...it was all truly there. One line in particular bewildered him the most.
'...often thrown him into fire or water to kill him...'
Although Kurt had never bothered or really wanted to count the times the villagers had successfully caught him and tried to burn him, it had been quite a few, he was sure. But they'd never killed him, for he always teleported away in the end. Mystique had dropped him into a river when he was just a baby, whether accidentally or not he wasn't exactly sure, but no matter how it had happened he was lucky to survive it.
It was strange, the similarity. Another line intrigued him. 'The boy looked so much like a corpse that many said, "He's dead."' Rogue had told him that when she'd finally gotten the demon out, he had worried her, making her think that he hadn't survived. In a sense, she probably was still thinking just that.
Kurt sighed and put his Bible down. He had been trying so hard to remember something that he never knew, that it never occurred to him that perhaps he didn't want to know. The small images he had were frightening enough; perhaps it was just best to leave it at that. Even though he did not like the idea of having something like that happen to him and never know the truth, there may have even been something Rogue was not telling him. And that was fine with him, he figured, as long as she was just doing it for his own good.
Kurt kicked the covers off him and got out of bed. Due to his ability to see in total darkness, there was no need to turn on his light. He went to his mirror and took a look at himself, blue and fuzzy, with yellow eyes and pointy ears. He looked for a minute or two, then remembered something Rogue had told him a minute ago. Carefully, he looked at his reflection in the mirror, trying to find any small trace of the cut Wolverine had apparently given him.
He could find nothing. No scar, no trace of blood...the skin was flawless. For all he knew Rogue could've made the whole thing up. But what would be the point of that? She'd said there was nothing there because in truth, it was never Kurt doing all those terrible things. It was the demon. Like it was a separate entity. He stared at his face where some mark should have been. Nothing. Like nothing had happened.
He remembered Rogue telling him about when he'd bit Jean. He looked at his fangs in the mirror, wondering if he'd find some trace of blood there, but still nothing. Like nothing had happened.
Well, in any case, at least he would have no physical scars to remind him of the ordeal. As much as something inside Kurt was nagging to know the truth, he tried to ignore it. Something else inside was telling him that it was probably best not to know. Being possessed by the devil was most likely not fun. Who'd want to remember that?
Kurt remembered the last line of the story he'd just read. He kept it running through his head as he walked to his door and out of his room.
He couldn't let Kitty and Rogue get away with HIS desserts, after all.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And that's the end :) So what did you guys think? Again, I'm really glad you guys enjoyed this story and I hope this was a good enough ending for you. I just have a few things more to say.
First of all, the passage used in this story is Mark 9:14-27. Let me just say that I did not base this story off of that particular passage, though it could probably seem like I did. I actually found it AFTER I had written out the first draft, and thought the similarity was so cool that I just had to include it. There was another line in that story which I didn't include here, but also was very similar to this story. And that is Mark 9:29, "This kind can come out only by prayer," in reference to the spirit, of course. Again, I found this passage after the story had basically been written, which just goes to show how cool things like that can be :)
Anyway, the idea for this story came to me when I started to wonder, what might happen if Kurt were to find out who his father was? And after some playing around with the idea, this story was born. It was a complete 180 degree turn from everything else I've written on FF.Net, and I wasn't sure how well it would be received due to its content. I don't know who had the bright idea of making the devil Kurt's father, which I think was a pretty unfair decision altogether, but I decided to play with the idea anyway. I hope the decision to have Kurt not remember pretty much of anything about the experience didn't seem like too much of an "easy way out" to you all: as I demonstrated earlier in the story, Kurt would probably go off the deep end if he ever knew.
All in all, I'm glad you guys liked this story, and thanks to all of you that reviewed, even to those that didn't review and just read. Like I said before, this was so completely different than anything else I've written for the site, and thank you for making this story a success, at least in my eyes :)
~~~Seraphim737
Author's Note: Well, I was wrong last chapter. There will not be two more chapters; this will be the last one. I'm really glad you all have enjoyed this as much as you have and I hope this conclusion will be a satisfying one. As always, a longer author's note at the end, so enjoy! =)
Rogue stared for what felt like forever at Kurt's immobile form. Slowly, cautiously, she reached forward and brushed some of his hair out of his face. He did not appear to be breathing. *Oh, God, no...* she thought panickedly.
"Kurt?" she said. "Are you all right?" He didn't stir. *Oh, God, he's dead! I killed my brother!* Rogue was in a rather irrational state of mind at the moment. She was so desperate for Kurt to be okay, and so incredulous that her plan had actually worked, that she was jumping to conclusions hardly two minutes after it had all happened.
"I must admit to you that I am somehow surprised."
Rogue jumped. Looking up, she saw a sight that almost made her scream. Standing barely ten feet in front of her was an enormous monster, eyes red, skin red, dark hair, which must have been at least eight feet tall. It didn't even take her half a second to figure out who it must be.
Upon seeing the fear in Rogue's eyes, Azazel grinned. "You have been quite the annoyance to me throughout this entire ordeal." It made Rogue shudder to hear how deep his voice was. "You just couldn't help getting involved, could you? You set me back a considerable amount of time. And now look what you've done. You've ruined it. You've ruined everything."
"What do you want?" Rogue asked, fighting to keep the fear out of her voice. She held Kurt's head in her lap protectively, eyeing Azazel as if just daring him to come any closer.
"Nothing from you. And I no longer want anything of my son there, either. You see, Kurt has always had a demon inside him, a much more powerful form than his rather useless human one. I came to release it, so that he might be of some use to me."
Rogue froze. She couldn't have heard him right. "Wait...did you just say...Kurt was your SON?"
"I did. But quite a useless one in the state he was in. Everything was going quite well until you intervened. Now thanks to you, he will forever remain this weak, worthless human that I am ashamed to call my son."
"He ain't weak and he ain't worthless, ya creep!" Rogue shouted angrily. "Look, if you're not going to bother Kurt anymore, then get outta here and leave us alone!!!"
Azazel smirked at her. "Of course I'm not going to bother you anymore. I came here for my demon son and you have destroyed him. What makes you think I want him now?"
Rogue did not reply. She only glared at him as if he would shrink back if she put enough hatred into it. Azazel's somehow satisfied expression did not change. He laughed and said, "It would be terribly ironic if you went through all that trouble and he didn't survive. I'm not so sure that he did, you know; I WAS awfully close to finishing him when he left." He laughed again once he saw fear jump into Rogue's eyes.
"Enjoy the corpse." And with a teleport that strongly resembled Kurt's, Azazel was gone.
Overwhelmed with anger, Rogue shouted at the lingering cloud the most vulgar and foul things her mind could come up with in its irrational, fearful state. She screamed all the offensive things she knew until long after Azazel's cloud had disappeared. Even then, she didn't know for how long she had gone on. After her anger was somewhat spent, she turned back to her still unconscious brother, half believing him to be dead.
"Kurt," she said, fighting not to lose hope after finally getting him back. "Come on, Kurt. If you're playing one of your stupid jokes then it's not funny. I know that jerk's a liar, I know you're not really dead, but the least you could do is breathe, dammit!!"
Rogue heard the grass rustle and looked up. Logan and the professor were standing over her, both looking concerned, both unaware of what exactly was happening. The two of them had regained consciousness not long ago and came to see what was going on.
"Is the elf all right?" Logan asked, his eyes looking somewhat tense.
"Logan, I don't know if he's alive or what, please do something!"
"He's not dead, Rogue," Professor X assured her calmly. "Your success was extremely fortunate."
"Elf?" Logan said, nudging him. "Come on now, don't do this."
"Kurt!!" Rogue shouted, beginning to panic. If Kurt was indeed alive, then that was all well and good, but what if he was in some sort of coma? Rogue's mind could not settle on one thought.
But at the sound of her yell, Kurt noticeably cringed. "I'm avake, Rogue," he said almost inaudibly.
Yes! He was alive! Azazel hadn't killed him! Rogue felt triumphantly victorious and was too delighted for words.
"Stop yelling..." Kurt said, "...I just don't feel like talking right now."
Rogue suddenly felt a pang of guilt. Why hadn't she thought of that earlier? He had just been too tired to reply to her, that was all it had been.
"I'm sorry...you don't have to do anything, Kurt, I'm sorry," she apologized quickly.
Kurt looked around and saw Wolverine and the professor. To his horror, that was all he saw. Where were the other X-Men? What had happened to them? "Rogue...did I kill anyvun? Vhere is everybody?"
"They're fine, Kurt, don't worry about it. Don't worry, you can close your eyes, it's over now."
***
Kurt had heard Rogue's voice deep inside those endless flames; he remembered why he used to say that prayer almost every night. He'd resisted Azazel, resisted the demon, and was able to finally drive it out. He remembered a feeling like teleporting, and the next thing Kurt saw was the sky as he was lying on the institute grounds, looking up. The fatigue and weakness at that point was overwhelming, and Kurt had fallen instantly asleep.
However, he was unpleasantly awakened by the frantic yells of Rogue not long afterward. But he was so tired...he couldn't even think straight enough to realize that she would think he was dead if he didn't say something. But after he had drifted off to sleep and been awakened a second time, he finally asked her to stop shouting. She'd respected his wish and Kurt next awoke in his own bed.
***
For the next week nobody saw much of Kurt. He spent most of his time sleeping, occasionally wandering into the kitchen to get something to eat, but never saying a word to anybody. He avoided eye contact with any of the other X-Men as well. For the most part nobody gave him a hard time about it. They could understand that he probably needed some time to himself after all that had happened. But after a while, Rogue felt like she needed to confront him. After all, she hadn't exactly gotten over the events of Kurt's possession either.
One night before dinner, she and the other X-Men, minus Kurt of course, were sitting at the table doing homework like usual. For the first day or two after Kurt had gone back to normal, there had been little or no conversation among them during this time. But lately, things were beginning to stray in a more casual direction, and even a normal conversation was being had around the table.
Rogue stood up and began to walk out of the room. "Hey Rogue," Kitty called, "where're you going?"
"Oh...I'm just gonna see if Kurt wants to have dinner with us tonight," she replied.
"Oh." There was a short uneasy pause between them. "Well..." Kitty finally said, "tell him I hope he comes."
"I will." And Rogue left the room.
Once upstairs, she found that there was no light coming from underneath Kurt's door. He must be sleeping again. She lifted her hand to knock, but then decided that there really was no point. She was going to talk to him no matter what. So, as quietly as she could, Rogue opened the door and let herself in.
"Is that you, Rogue?" came a mildly tired voice from the bed.
"Yeah, it's me," she replied, not bothering to close the door all the way in order to let in some light.
"I vas hoping it might be you." Kurt pushed the covers off him and sat up. Rogue walked over to the bedside.
"You been having any nightmares or anything lately? Just out of curiosity."
"Dreamless."
"That's good," she replied, smiling. She took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. "So...do you feel any better?"
"I don't really know. I don't even know vhat happened."
"What do you mean?"
He didn't say anything for a while, obviously thinking deeply about something. "I just...he vas making me forget everything...and I...sort of remember some of the things that happened after that, but not really...and then I voke up and you vere there, and I thought I'd killed everybody else."
"I told you, Kurt...you didn't kill anybody," she told him in her most reassuring voice.
"I know."
Rogue was silent herself for a moment then. "Well...what DO you remember? Anything?"
He nodded, slowly. "I remember he told me he vas the devil...and I remember fire...and I remember you saying that psalm to me. That's about the best thing I remember about it all."
"That's all? You don't remember anything else?"
He paused before shaking his head no.
So he didn't know that he was Azazel's son. Of course, Rogue didn't know if he had ever told Kurt, but it didn't matter. He didn't remember. She figured it best not to tell him. It was probably the last thing Kurt ever needed to hear.
"How did you know that psalm, anyvay?" Kurt asked.
"Well...I touched you, the demon I mean, and it was the only thing out of you that I got. I figured it would help bring you back. And I guess it did."
Kurt sighed distractedly. "I used to say it all the time. Vhen I vas little...."
"Um...do you mind me asking why? I mean...what does it mean, exactly?"
Kurt shook his head to say no, he did not mind. "It means...that your life can be horrible, you can be overvhelmed by all your sorrow and everything else, but it doesn't matter, because God vill alvays be merciful to you. All you have to do is ask for it."
There was a short silence. "And it helped?"
"Nothing else really did. Especially after they'd been chasing me all night......it made me feel better."
They stayed there for a moment in silence. Kurt was not looking at her, rather staring straight ahead. Rogue saw the look on his face and could tell that something was still bothering him. "Kurt," she said softly, sitting on the edge of his bed, "what are you still so afraid of, huh? He's never coming back here again, you know that, right?"
He looked her full in the face, no expression there besides exhaustion. There was a silence, one like all the others that had passed in their conversation thus far. He'd stayed quiet in order to think about what he was going to say next. "I'm afraid of vhat I did," he finally said. "Vhat I did...here. To all of you."
Rogue felt like she should be tired of telling him this, but oddly enough it didn't bother her in the least. "You didn't kill anybody, Kurt. You didn't even hurt anybody that badly. Matter of fact, it wasn't even really you."
He blinked once, slowly. "Vhat did I do, then?"
Rogue realized now that nobody had ever told him what happened while the demon was running rampant in the institute. He'd never asked up till now, and no one had ever really gotten the chance to tell him. They probably didn't even want to tell him.
"Well..." she started out slowly, "the demon was running around for about an hour, prob'ly longer. And he did a lot less damage than he was aiming to, you know. A lot less."
"Rogue..." Kurt said in a way that almost sounded exasperated. "Just tell me vhat I did. I vant to know."
Rogue sighed. She might as well tell him if he wanted to know so much. Even though she hadn't been around for most of the demon's attacks, she had found out about them after seeing the others' injuries. So she told Kurt about the demon biting Jean, stabbing Evan, shattering Scott's visor, and all the other things he'd done to them. But she also added, with extra emphasis, all the times they'd escaped the demon's violence. She even told him about how Logan was able to attack the demon and cut its face.
"He did that?" Kurt asked, curiously feeling his face for signs of a cut or scar. "But...there's nothing here."
"That's 'cause it wasn't you, it was that demon."
"Oh...." Rogue waited a minute or two before realizing that he was not going to say anything else.
"Well, is there anything you need?" she asked hopefully, not liking to see him so depressed over something that was never even his fault.
"No, Rogue. Thank you."
Rogue sighed and stood up. "All right." She walked towards the door and suddenly stopped. "Just so you know," she said, "Kitty and I have been eating your dessert every night." And she left.
Kurt sat in bed for a while after she left. It wasn't like he was being stubborn, or like he enjoyed being depressed and isolated, he was just confused. And even though Rogue was being extremely helpful, she couldn't give him the satisfaction of knowing the one thing that was driving him crazy.
No matter how many times he ran it over in his head, there were only a limited amount of things he remembered from a week ago. He remembered the entire morning of that day, the voices and the pain that the voice had brought Kurt when he tried to make it all go away himself. He could recall attacking Rogue the first time, momentarily forgetting all about her. And from there things started to fade. From then on all he had were little flashes of remembrance of seemingly random things. Kurt remembered fire, endless fire everywhere, like the first night. He could recall some other pain, brought to him for some unknown reason, and then of course there was the revelation of the identity of that maddening voice. Kurt had tried so hard to remember even this much that he wasn't sure what was true and what he had made up just for satisfaction.
But by far the thing he remembered best was hearing Rogue's voice saying that psalm to him. He doubted that he would have ever been free of that monster were it not for her.
Tired with thinking for the moment, Kurt reached across to his table and picked up his Bible. He idly flipped through it, looking for nothing in particular to read. He stopped at a random page, which happened to be the Gospel of Mark. His eyes fell on a random passage and he simply began to read:
~~~
When they came to the other disciples, they saw a large crowd around them and the teachers of the law arguing with them. As soon as the people saw Jesus, they were overwhelmed with wonder and ran to greet him.
"What are you arguing with them about?" he asked.
A man in the crowd answered, "Teacher, I brought you my son, who is possessed by a spirit that has robbed him of speech. Whenever it seizes him, it throws him to the ground. He foams at the mouth, gnashes his teeth and becomes rigid. I asked your disciples to drive out the spirit, but they could not."
"O unbelieving generation," Jesus replied, "how long shall I stay with you? How long shall I put up with you? Bring the boy to me."
So they brought him. When the spirit saw Jesus, it immediately threw the boy into a convulsion. He fell to the ground and rolled around, foaming at the mouth.
Jesus asked the boy's father, "How long has he been like this?"
"From childhood," he answered. "It has often thrown him into fire or water to kill him. But if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us."
"'If you can'?" said Jesus. "Everything is possible for him who believes."
Immediately the boy's father exclaimed, "I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!"
When Jesus saw that a crowd was running to the scene, he rebuked the evil spirit. "You deaf and mute spirit," he said, "I command you, come out of him and never enter him again."
The spirit shrieked, convulsed him violently and came out. The boy looked so much like a corpse that many said, "He's dead."
But Jesus took him by the hand and lifted him to his feet, and he stood up.
~~~
Kurt stopped reading. He was shocked. That passage sounded almost exactly like what had happened to him. He read it again to make sure he wasn't just making it up. No...it was all truly there. One line in particular bewildered him the most.
'...often thrown him into fire or water to kill him...'
Although Kurt had never bothered or really wanted to count the times the villagers had successfully caught him and tried to burn him, it had been quite a few, he was sure. But they'd never killed him, for he always teleported away in the end. Mystique had dropped him into a river when he was just a baby, whether accidentally or not he wasn't exactly sure, but no matter how it had happened he was lucky to survive it.
It was strange, the similarity. Another line intrigued him. 'The boy looked so much like a corpse that many said, "He's dead."' Rogue had told him that when she'd finally gotten the demon out, he had worried her, making her think that he hadn't survived. In a sense, she probably was still thinking just that.
Kurt sighed and put his Bible down. He had been trying so hard to remember something that he never knew, that it never occurred to him that perhaps he didn't want to know. The small images he had were frightening enough; perhaps it was just best to leave it at that. Even though he did not like the idea of having something like that happen to him and never know the truth, there may have even been something Rogue was not telling him. And that was fine with him, he figured, as long as she was just doing it for his own good.
Kurt kicked the covers off him and got out of bed. Due to his ability to see in total darkness, there was no need to turn on his light. He went to his mirror and took a look at himself, blue and fuzzy, with yellow eyes and pointy ears. He looked for a minute or two, then remembered something Rogue had told him a minute ago. Carefully, he looked at his reflection in the mirror, trying to find any small trace of the cut Wolverine had apparently given him.
He could find nothing. No scar, no trace of blood...the skin was flawless. For all he knew Rogue could've made the whole thing up. But what would be the point of that? She'd said there was nothing there because in truth, it was never Kurt doing all those terrible things. It was the demon. Like it was a separate entity. He stared at his face where some mark should have been. Nothing. Like nothing had happened.
He remembered Rogue telling him about when he'd bit Jean. He looked at his fangs in the mirror, wondering if he'd find some trace of blood there, but still nothing. Like nothing had happened.
Well, in any case, at least he would have no physical scars to remind him of the ordeal. As much as something inside Kurt was nagging to know the truth, he tried to ignore it. Something else inside was telling him that it was probably best not to know. Being possessed by the devil was most likely not fun. Who'd want to remember that?
Kurt remembered the last line of the story he'd just read. He kept it running through his head as he walked to his door and out of his room.
He couldn't let Kitty and Rogue get away with HIS desserts, after all.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And that's the end :) So what did you guys think? Again, I'm really glad you guys enjoyed this story and I hope this was a good enough ending for you. I just have a few things more to say.
First of all, the passage used in this story is Mark 9:14-27. Let me just say that I did not base this story off of that particular passage, though it could probably seem like I did. I actually found it AFTER I had written out the first draft, and thought the similarity was so cool that I just had to include it. There was another line in that story which I didn't include here, but also was very similar to this story. And that is Mark 9:29, "This kind can come out only by prayer," in reference to the spirit, of course. Again, I found this passage after the story had basically been written, which just goes to show how cool things like that can be :)
Anyway, the idea for this story came to me when I started to wonder, what might happen if Kurt were to find out who his father was? And after some playing around with the idea, this story was born. It was a complete 180 degree turn from everything else I've written on FF.Net, and I wasn't sure how well it would be received due to its content. I don't know who had the bright idea of making the devil Kurt's father, which I think was a pretty unfair decision altogether, but I decided to play with the idea anyway. I hope the decision to have Kurt not remember pretty much of anything about the experience didn't seem like too much of an "easy way out" to you all: as I demonstrated earlier in the story, Kurt would probably go off the deep end if he ever knew.
All in all, I'm glad you guys liked this story, and thanks to all of you that reviewed, even to those that didn't review and just read. Like I said before, this was so completely different than anything else I've written for the site, and thank you for making this story a success, at least in my eyes :)
~~~Seraphim737