Chapter Five

Where Wizards and Witches Fear to Tread

Albus paced in his quarters from his bed to the far window and back. As was his habit he was thinking out loud. "I am supposed to be a great strategies, am I not? There must be a way to turn this situation to my advantage."

Fawkes shuffled his clawed feet on his perch. He knew better than to distract his human when he was perambulating and percolating plans. One never knew what the outcome of such an interruption could be.

"Cheating is a time-honored tradition. Besides who would know besides me?" Albus stroked his beard. "A crumb of comfort and ease in my time of ... of travail."

Fawkes gave a cautious high-pitched chirp.

"Minerva? Why else did she send me a note saying to expect her this morning. Neither one of us is used to prolonged absence from the other."

Rap. Rap. Rap. The door opened and the woman in question sidled in and gave Albus a peck on the cheek. She pulled away before his hands could fully encircle her waist.

"Good morning, Albus. I just came to -"

"To tell me how much you've missed me and how you long to be ravished." Albus reached for her yet again.

Minerva brightened at his teasing. "I've missed you too. Terribly."

"It's only dawn and our physicals are at midday. Timing is very good."

"Hmm, quite." Minerva smoothed her hand down the front of his purple robes. "I've removed mine already."

Albus perked up in every possible literal way. His hand slid downwards and confirmed the lack of Minerva's telltale chastity belt. "As usual ten steps ahead of me, my dear."

Minerva's fingers made short work of opening Albus' robes. "Let's remove yours shall we."

"By all means," Albus said. In a matter of minutes, he welcomed the feeling of being a free man once more. "Shall we take advantage of this respite from our required labors?"

"A forthnight, Albus, remember? We have a few days left."

"But why else did you remove our devices?"

"Strap marks, Albus. We remove them now and there won't be any marks for Poppy to find. You know how thorough she can be. One more thing." Minerva waved her wand. Albus felt a tingle of energy course down his body.

"Was that truly necessary, darling? Obviously, your trust is me is nonexistent." Albus' voice dripped with sarcasm.

"It's not a matter of trust, my love. I know you have no willpower whatsoever in this matter."

Fawkes squawked loudly.

Albus glared at his familiar. "I am a grown man not a child."

"I don't like it either but it is for a good cause. We shall resume our devices after our examinations today." Minerva kissed his cheek lightly before leaving his quarters.

The master strategist sat in his armchair. His dejection and disgust complimenting the picture of utter defeat he epitomized. "A deflating charm, Fawkes. How ... how devious. This is what happens when a witch knows you too well."

The infirmary door opened and the immediately issued command was firm and peremptory. "Assume the position!"

"I beg your pardon!" Minerva exclaimed amused.

Sitting behind her desk, Poppy looked up to see her next physical appointment. "I'm sorry, Minerva. It has been quite a day and barely passed noon."

"I can tell." Minerva removed her outer robe and sat down on the examination cot. "Have you had many difficult patients?"

"Petty, self-indulgent, obstructive and more than a few in complete denial." Poppy chuckled. "Self-discipline is not a common trait." Poppy cast several charms and spells. Strands of colorful energies wound and weaved around Minerva's form.

"Physicals are not welcomed, Poppy. It's like a reminder of our mortality."

"Given some of the staff's peculiar vices, their mortality will be very short indeed." Poppy's quill danced across the parchment on her desk recording Minerva's test results.

"Most vices are not life-threatening and give some enjoyment in return."

"Anything, anything at all, when taken to extremes can be harmful." Poppy waved her wand once more. Minerva felt a curious jab on her arm. "There, that is the latest magical influenza vaccination, Minerva."

Minerva rubbed her upper arm. "I'm hardly sick, Poppy. I doubt I have need of this."

"It is a simple precaution. Report to me any side effects you may experience." Poppy put her wand back on her table. "As always you are in optimal physical health - excellent muscle tone, everything at your normal levels -"

"If that is all then, I shall return to my duties." Minerva began to slip into her outer robes.

Poppy crossed her arms. That was a sure signal that the physical was not over. "As I was saying, normal but for estrogen and a few other chemical imbalances. Have you been feeling frustrated lately?"

"What does that have to do with anything?" Minerva exclaimed.

"I am the health practioner charged with your health and welfare, Minerva McGonagall. Now answer the question. Frustrated lately?"

"Yes." Minerva fastened her robe anxious to be out of the infirmary. "How did you know that?"

"Imbalances in the body can be interpreted as symptoms of physical and non-physical conditions. Mental health and physical well being go hand in hand." Poppy glanced at her quill to make sure it was still recording her notes. "I suppose you have also been somewhat restless recently?"

Minerva sighed. "Yes. Surely that is a normal reaction."

"Witches in your age group and, ahem, life circumstances, are prone to depression. Frustration and restlessness are early warning signs of a -"

"I assure you I am not the least bit depressed." Minerva interrupted.

"Have you given some thought to my past suggestions?"

"You have made so many which ones in particular do you refer to?" Minerva asked with an arch to her brow.

"There's another symptom. Increased sensitivity to criticism." Poppy remarked. "Romance, intimate companionship, adventure, excitement. Something to shake you from the doldrums of your life. I mean you're not Hogwarts' own vestal virgin are you?"

Minerva sucked in her breath and pursed her lips lest she erupt with an ill-timed revelation or two or three.

Poppy droned on. "You're not unattractive after all. You've not let yourself go. Find yourself a willing wizard. Nothing like a good shag to raise your heart rate and hormone levels."

Minerva cleared her throat before responding. "I shall endeavor to follow your advice, Poppy, as soon as I may."

"You promise?"

"Absolutely. Thoroughly. My word as a McGonagall. If that is all, good day, Poppy." Minerva swept out of the infirmary with her head held high.

Poppy reviewed the parchment listing Minerva's test results. Though not as effective as veritaserum, the mediwitch's recording charm was good enough to detect superficial lies in the patient's responses and feelings. Frustration Positive. Restlessness Positive. Hypersensitivity Positive.

Poppy said out loud dictating to the recording quill. "Begin notes. Whatever is going on here at the school Minerva is not involved. Her physical results are the usual. Hardly a variation from year to year. Physical condition optimal and above the norms for her age group for which I attribute to cross effects from her animagi transformations. Her emotional state continues to be a concern however. In my professional opinion, the patient is at a crossroads in her life. It is not too late to change her fortunes and prospects. End notes."

She rolled up Minerva's parchment, placed it inside a locked drawer and set a fresh parchment on her desk in readiness for her next appointment.

Later that evening in the headmaster's office, the rustling of paper and the scratchings of quill on paper could be heard interrupted intermittently by the clinking of glass and china. The portraits watched the proceedings intently but made no comment. Occasionally Phineas Nigellus would nod approvingly. Dilys Derwent rolled her eyes quite frequently. Their focus was on the five people seated around a large round table. Hanging in midair was a large world map.

"Our main problem will be the transport phase between Ecuador and here on the return trip." Minerva pointed to the map. "I have researched possible apparition points but none are suitable to our needs. Either there are too many steps or the locations are too public. And, of course, the size of the package and the need for secrecy must be considered."

"Time will also be a factor, Minerva. The stasis spell will only last 24 hours. The plant must be replanted within that time window. The plant will be useless after 24 hours." Cera Sprout clarified.

"I believe the solution I have devised will work for our purposes." Minerva tapped the map once with her wand. "Travel by sea is out as it would be too slow. Travel by apparition is not feasible coming back. The only viable option is to travel by air."

"What are you proposing, Minerva?" Snape asked. "Shall we sneak the plant onto a cargo plane?"

Albus shot an amused glance at his deputy before replying. "Not quite but close."

"I've found a flight schedule that fits our needs." Minerva took a deep breath before continuing. "From Ecuador our first destination will be Bogota, Colombia. From there we take an international flight to Atlanta, Georgia which is in the the United States. Then Atlanta to Heathrow. Elapsed flight time is 15 hours. Assuming that it will take us 4 hours to get from Ecuador to Bogota by air that gives us 4 hours leftover."

"I've always wanted to try an airplane flight." Flitwick mused.

Minerva shook her head. "We won't be traveling as passengers."

"Cargo!?" Snape declared. "I categorically refuse!"

"No, not cargo," Minerva whipped back. "We cannot risk the paper trail that booking seats would entail. And we absolutely cannot risk adding the considerable weight of the plant to any cargo manifest. The muggles would certainly notice the weight difference."

"Then how are we to do this?" Sprout asked.

Minerva took a deep breath and mustered her most authoritative voice. "We will instead be traveling on the superstructure of the ... the airplane. On top of the airplane to be exact."

Silence. The heads of houses sat speechless with mouths hanging open and eyes dazed by the appalling vision that was surely playing out in their minds - their poor selves buffetted by ferocious winds, tormented by icy temperatures, set upon by brutal atmospheric thunderstorms. There were very good reasons why the wizarding world preferred apparition or floo travel.

Sensing an imminent mutiny, Albus stood up and addressed the group. "I realize that traveling in such a manner will be hazardous. Therefore, I have devised a charm that will keep you all in warmth and comfort for the entire journey. You won't feel a thing I assure you." The headmaster clapped his hands and smiled widely at them all breaking through their stunned silence.. "This has been a splendid strategy session. Why don't we adjourn to our respective patrols."

Dumbledore and the heads of houses filed out. The door had barely closed when the portraits began to mutter and chatter.

"This is unprecedented I tell you!" a portrait on the west wall shouted.

"An abuse of power I say!" shouted another portrait. "Gross abuse!"

"What good can come out of this?" asked a crone of a witch.

"Would anyone know if the Ministry has twigged to Dumbledore's latest project?" Armando asked.

"I do not believe so," replied Dilys Derwent.

"This is an entirely private effort concerning the Ministry not at all," Phineus said to all who would listen. "The planning is proceeding well and carefully. What could go wrong?"

Molly Weasley turned the dial on her wireless set. She spared a glance at her clock and sighed contentedly. Today the clock didn't point at mortal peril for anyone in her family. Her husband's indicator was set on "Traveling." She smiled when she heard the telltale sound of an apparition nearby. Arthur Weaseley bustled into the room. He looked far too exhausted for a typical late evening.

"Arthur, are you ill?" Molly felt her husband's forehead. "A nice cup of tea will set you to rights. I've kept dinner warm."

"Firewhisky would be better, Molly dear." Arthur said landing in a heap on the sofa. "I've had quite a day. Ten raids in all."

Mrs. Weasley went off to get the firewhiskey as the wireless droned on. "As a public service, the Department of Wizarding Health and Medicine has released an announcement regarding the latest outbreak of magical influenza. In the best interests of public health and safety, the Department urges everyone to apply for a vaccination as soon as possible to protect themselves and their families. This year's influenza has been shown to be more potent than past outbreaks. Now, here's Fingol Macashen with the weather."

Author's Notes:

Long Suffering Waiting Readers - I hope this chapter lives up to expectations. I am updating my other WIPs as I want to finish and eager to resume writing original material.

Mugglemin - To answer your review question from the other story, I've been to Dorset, yes, and lots of other places besides. My life has turned 360 deg several times, personally, professionally and everything else in between. My life is more crowded than ever and I'm happier for it strangely enough. The Chinese have a saying: May you live in interesting times. I don't know whether that is meant to be a blessing or a curse but I'll take it either way. Makes for a non-boring life.

Jack - Nag, nag, nag. That's all I get. Thanks for the inspiring lines which I've shamelessly used above.