Wee!  After vowing to myself 6 years ago that I would NEVER write a FF7 fanfic, here I am breaking that vow!  And not to mention it's not on my favorite couple!

Warnings:  This fic is pre-game and contains Shounen-ai.  If you don't like, click the back button.

Feedback is welcomed and greatly appreciated.  ^_^;;  This story is also dedicated to WolfPilot06, as she was the one who inspired me to do it based on our RP.

Well, enjoy!

I don't understand you...

It seems so long ago when I first came here; yet, it has been barely half a year already.  So long ago since I was saved from being beat up, yet again.

I always seem to attract trouble.  Whether it's from some thugs hanging out in the slums, waiting for their next victim, an officer who wanted to provide me with "special training", or from losing myself from the demons of my past.

Yet, you're still here for me.  Even after all the trouble I brought down on you, you're still willing to stay by me and take care of me.

No one has ever been this kind to me, save my own mother.  I've never really had someone you could call 'friend'.  But yet, I wished with all my very being for one.

You are that and more.  And it frightens me...

Why would someone like you, a First Class SOLDIER, second-in-command to Sephiroth himself, spend his time with a lowly recruit?

I told you all about where I was from.

My parents...  My mother and I living alone.  She told me my father died when I was very young, but I know that wasn't the story.  I know what really happened and so does everyone else in my village.  They don't think I can hear what the adults whisper between each other, but they're just as naïve.  Ironic, really, considering that they say that children my age don't understand "adult" affairs.

My mother…  She could barely afford to feed the both of us.  The only way we survived was thanks to her doing odd jobs around the village.  I will always be grateful to her, but always feel guilty, as I could only cause her harm and grief.

The village...  My mother and I being the 'outcasts' of the village.  No one would play with me because I was 'different' from everyone.  Everyone had a mother and father, yet, I didn't.  The adults spreading rumors about my mother.  Why would a father leave his wife and child alone?

Myself...  I was very small and petite for a young boy, that I got teased very often.  I would come home, covered in blood and mud.  My mother would take me to the bathroom and wash the blood and mud caked into my skin.  She would gently clean my scratches, wrapping them up carefully.  She would always smile at me, but I know what she was really feeling inside.  She didn't think that I would notice her eyes watering since I was a child and supposedly didn't understand anything.

Tifa...  The one girl I admired most in our village.  The most popular among children our age too.  If I could get her attention, then maybe people wouldn't pick on me anymore.  Always watching out for her from the distance.  I didn't want to bring harm upon her.  But it seems no matter what I do, I always bring trouble to people I care for...

My dream...  I left Nibelheim to join SOLDIER.  All because I want to prove to people back there that I could become something, that I wasn't a nothing.  That way, Tifa would notice me too.  Then, others would notice me.  I wouldn't be a burden on anyone anymore.  And I don't want to be a burden to you either...

After telling you all that, I thought you wouldn't want to be around me anymore.  That, like everyone else, you wouldn't want to be near me, because I just bring trouble.  Yet, you held me and let me cry.  Another weakness I didn't want to show in front of you.

You told me it was okay to cry.  And you said you were sorry.  Why did you apologize to me?  It wasn't your fault...

I closed my eyes, leaning against you.  It felt so warm being held.  Your hand in my hair, your other hand stroking my back gently... 

Warmth...  Not just because of your body, but something else that I can't identify.  I don't think I've felt this way since I was very young, where my mother held me in her arms.

You're always giving me encouragement.  That smile of yours...  do you know, when you smile for me, I feel my heart race?  Or when you laugh and ruffle my hair, I feel warm inside?  Or when you call me 'cute' and 'adorable', that I'm far from offended, but flattered?

You spend so much time with me when no one else would.  I consider you a friend, but much more.  So much more...

I felt myself being lifted up and when I opened my eyes, we were on my bed.  You said nothing, but no words were needed between us.  Words could never be enough to convey the feelings that I feel right now...

I felt a blanket being tossed over the both of us.  You lean over to turn off the lamp and tell me gently that I need to sleep, that I have a long day tomorrow.  You tell me that you'll be here when I wake up tomorrow morning, that after I come home, we can have another practice session and that for dinner, you'll take me to a restaurant that you promised to take me.

I finally lose myself into slumber's embrace.  Your voice is like a buzz in the back of my head now.  But right now, I'll make a promise to myself and to you.

I'll make this up for you, somehow.  I owe you something that I can probably never pay you back for.  You'd probably laugh and tell me I don't owe you anything.  Yet, I want to give you something in return.

You gave me something I never had...  A friendship that I'll cherish forever...

I promise, one day, I'll have something to give to you.  Something that perhaps, you never had either, that you'll cherish as well.

One day, Zack, I promise...