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Rurouni Kenshin:

Tears

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Empty space and darkness... running feet echoing... echoing, then... the sound of a sword piercing through a human body, so loud and deafening. Blood... so much blood. A flash of white light... Tomoe!! I'm sorry... I'm so sorry Tomoe! Don't die! Don't leave me... TOMOE!!

"Kenshin!!"
"Oro?" Kenshin said, startled at being jerked so suddenly from his thoughts. He felt a tear running down his cheek and wiped it away quickly with the sleeve of his shirt. Luckily Kaoru didn't seem to notice.
"Kenshin, what's wrong? You've hardly touched your rice." Kaoru said, looking at Kenshin with concerned eyes.
"Oh it's nothing Kaoru-dono..." He replied with a strained smile. Kaoru looked even more worried at his response. He had been like this for the past few days. He seemed unfocused and as though he was lost in deep thought. This wasn't like Kenshin at all. I know you're not telling me something Kenshin. But why won't you share your feelings with me? You never talk about yourself. Is it that you don't trust me enough...?
She looked over at Kenshin who seemed to be daydreaming again. She suddenly felt angry. Angry at Kenshin for being so selfish as to keep his feelings locked away to himself. "Kenshin! I..." Kaoru started but before she could go any further... *BURP!!*
"Ahahaha! Did you hear that Sanosuke? No one can beat a belch like that!" Yahiko proclaimed loudly.
"Oh yeah! Is that a challenge? Well we'll just see who gets the last laugh in the end!" Sanosuke replied hotly.
*BUURP!!*
*BUURRP!*
Kaoru slapped her forehead in resignment and sighed. Those two could be impossibly immature at times. But she couldn't help laughing along. The sound of tinkling china surprised everyone. They turned around and saw that Kenshin had dropped his bowl. "Oh! I'm sorry. I'll clean it up..." Kenshin got to his feet and was about to clear away the broken pieces when Kaoru got up and stopped him.
"I think you need rest Kenshin. It's obvious that you're not getting enough sleep."
"Oh don't worry about me, Kaoru-dono. Like I said before, I'm fine." He smiled innocently. But it wasn't enough to fool her, she saw right through him.
"Listen! You don't have to pretend everything's ok when it's not, Kenshin. Can't you think about your own well-being for once? Now go and get some rest..." Kaoru said in a more stern voice. She stooped down and gathered the broken pieces of the bowl. Kenshin looked over at Sano and Yahiko. They nodded in agreement with Kaoru. He sighed and left the room, shutting the doors gently behind him.

The breeze outside felt icy on his skin. He walked quickly to his room, which was quite warm as he expected it to be. Kenshin stood there for a moment, in the semi-darkness, wondering what he was doing. "Maybe I do need some rest..." He laid aside his sword and slumped down onto his futon. Soon his eyelids grew heavy and he couldn't resist.

Darkness. Isolation.
"Kenshin..."
"Who said that? Who's there?" Kenshin turned around, searching for the voice that had called his name.
"Kenshin... Kenshin..."
His eye caught a bright illuminous light. He ran toward it. Suddenly he found himself outside in a forest clearing. Kenshin's eyes grew wide as he saw himself, his young self, fighting off a man and running towards them was... Tomoe!! She was about to run in front of the young Kenshin. Kenshin knew what was going to happen next and he tried to stop the young Kenshin. But it was no good, they were like phantoms - painful images from his memory, haunting him. The scenes replayed in front of his eyes. "Tomoe!!! No!" Kenshin fell to his knees and clapped his hands around his head. Then, suddenly angry, he got up and took his sword and slashed at the images. The sound of sword hitting flesh... He opened his eyes and saw that he had slashed through someone. His eyes widened. "Tomoe!!" As she fell, Kenshin caught her and held her in his arms. She looked up at him with tears in her eyes. But it wasn't Tomoe, it was... Kaoru! "No! Kaoru! Not again! KAORU!!!"

Kenshin woke up and felt sweat running down his brow. He sat up and saw the familiar contents of his room. Anger suddenly erupted in his chest. He was angry that he let his past get to him like this and at the same time he was angryat what he had done in the past. He punched at the cupboard next to his futon. It shook violently. I can't let the Battousai return. I can't put more people in danger. I have to... get away.

Kaoru woke up with a start. A feeling of panic knawed at her. Why am I feeling like this? A thought struck her almost immediately. Kenshin. She hurriedly got got out of her futon and began scrambling clumsily to the door. She puffed as she ran to his room. She slid open the door and saw... that Kenshin was sleeping peacefully in his futon. Kaoru sighed with relief and smiled. There's nothing to worry about. Everything's fine. She closed the door gently and walked back to her room, laughing at how stupid she had been to get worked up over nothing.

Sunlight streamed into the room, stirring Kaoru from her sleep. She opened her eyes to see that it was morning. She groaned softly as she got up, got dressed and went outside. It was still quite early so Yahiko would still be asleep. The sky was darkening and thunderclouds were now moving steadily across the sky. Kaoru walked around for a while then noticed something strange. Kenshin should have been up by now, doing the laundry or something as he usually did. The feeling of panic from last night had returned, this time it felt stronger. She immediately ran to his room. She swung the door aside. Kenshin's room was neat and tidy as always. There, lying on his futon was a small envelope addressed 'To my family'. Kaoru suddenly felt dizzy. Everything around her seemed blurry and strange. She picked up the note with trembling hands, fearing the worst. Please don't let it be what I think it is. She opened the envelope slowly and caught her breath. She saw a few of the words written in neat handwriting on the piece of paper. '...leaving this place...I won't return...I'm sorry...' Kenshin's name was signed at the bottom.

"No! Kenshin!!" Kaoru felt as though a bucket of icy water had been dumped on her head. Still clutching the paper in her hand, she got up and ran outside looking around frantically as though expecting Kenshin to be sitting around somewhere, smiling at how his joke had fooled her. But there was no Kenshin and this wasn't a joke. Rain had started to pour down heavily now, lightning flashing across the black sky. Kaoru took no notice of this though and ran into the rain, out into the streets. She didn't feel the rain pelting at her face, soaking her clothes so it felt heavy and cold, or the thunder that cracked in the sky like a whip. She could only feel the hot tears that were running down her cheeks and her heart aching with pain. She stumbled around the dark, flooded streets until her legs were numb from the cold and from running around. She didn't care. She didn't care about anything now, all she wanted to do was find Kenshin. Even if it meant roaming around in the rain all night long. Kaoru stopped running. She was now absolutely soaked to the bone and her hair stuck to her face and neck. She was breathing hard and her face was pale. But she had to keep going. She took a step and slipped. She hit the ground hard and yelled in pain. Kaoru sat up and winced. She had sprained her ankle. Then a feeling hit her. A feeling that she hadn't felt in a long time. A feeling that she feared. A deep lonliness.

She couldn't bear it. Not again... I can't take it! Please not again... She bowed her head and cried. Her tears seemed to soak into her skin even deeper than the rain. Kaoru cried until her eyes were swollen and red and her face had gone pink. Even through the defeaning rain and thunder, her sobs seemed to echo throughout the whole town. Finally she slumped to the ground, defeated She realised that she was still clutching onto Kenshin's letter very tightly. She let her grip loosen. Kaoru saw that the ink had almost run completely off the paper. She closed her eyes, too exhausted to move. A sudden emptiness descended upon her and she thought no more. The letter slipped out of her hand and was carried away by the stream of rain...

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Ten years later

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"Kenshin! Slow down or you'll get hurt!" Kaoru smiled as her son ran around, playing with his friends.
"Oh don't worry about him Kaoru. He'll get hurt of course, but he's always ok in the end." Said a man's voice. Kaoru turned her head around to see a man with a gentle face and short brown hair, smiling at her.
"Shinji..." Kaoru said and smiled back. He came up to her and held her around the waist. They stood there for a while, watching Kenshin running around and bruising himself several times. "Well, I better get back to work." Shinji said. She nodded. He gave her a quick kiss on the cheek and left. Kaoru watched him disappear through the front doors of the dojo.

Ten years... ten long years since the night 'he' disappeared. So many things had happened since then. Yahiko had mastered the Kamiya Kasshin style and was currently travelling around the world. Sanosuke had left without saying why, but not before he showed his thanks for taking care of him by eating all the food that was left at the dojo. Megumi had become a pretty famous doctor and was also travelling around, helping sick people. And Kaoru... she had met Shinji. Never again had she thought that she would fall in love. But she did fall in love again - with Shinji. And they had a son whom Kaoru had named 'Kenshin'. She looked over at her son who greatly resembled his father - short brown hair and a gentle face.

Ten years since... Kenshin... disappeared. She tried not to think about it. It had been 10 years after all and she was not lonely anymore. She had a wonderful, loving family now. But still, it felt as though a part of her was missing. Kaoru shook the thoughts from her mind. It's all in the past now. So why am I still thinking about it? She turned around and looked fondly at the Kamiya dojo. It had gained a large amount of new students and the Kamiya Kasshin style was now widely known and proudly taught. Kaoru smiled to herself and looked up at the sky. It was darkening and a few stars were now visible. She called Kenshin inside and prepared dinner. Kenshin was just laying out the bowls when shinji returned home. They had dinner and talked about their day as usual. Kenshin picked at his bloody scratches and bruises until Kaoru told him to stop. Night fell quickly and soon it was time for bed. After Kenshin had settled in, Kaoru and Shinji went off to their room. They changed and got into their futons. Shinji had dozed off for a while before Kaoru found sleep herself.

Kaoru was jerked awake. The wind outside howled. She had barely been sleeping for an hour. Shae tried to get back to sleep but it was no use. She thought she might as well get up and walk off her restlessness. It was cold and windy outside so she pulled her clothes tighter around her. Suddenly a movement in the trees caught her eye. As soon as she set her eyes on it, it darted behind the walls of the dojo and disappeared.

I must be out of my mind! Kaoru thought as she chased after it. She followed it to a road that had cherry blossom trees on either side of the road. Kaoru saw that not too far up ahead, there was a person standing there, as if waiting for her. She moved closer and gasped. It couldn't be! Even though the person's back was facing toward her and itwas dark, she could make out chest-length red hair that was tied back and a sword tucked into the person's belt. Kaoruput her hands over her mouth, not daring to say his name. The person turned around... it was him... it was Kenshin, the Kenshin that disappeared 10 years ago. He looked older, from what she could make out in the dark anyway. Not able to hold back any longer, she yelled out his name. "Kenshin!!"
"Yes it's me, Kaoru-dono." He smiled at her. She couldn't believe her eyes. Tears started trickling down her cheeks. "No, it can't be you! After all these years..." Never once did Kenshin's smile falter.
"Why are you crying Kaoru-dono? There's nothing to be sad about." He walked towards her. She couldn't believe what she was hearing. Nothing to be sad about? Tears still continued to run down her cheeks. "I see you have a wonderful family now." He was still smiling.
"Kenshin..." Was all that Kaoru could bring herself to say. She looked up at him, into his eyes. The spark that he had in his eyes 10 years ago, was still there. Finding her voice again, she burst out, "How could you do this Kenshin?! And why?! Why come back after all these years?!"
"I just wanted to see you one last time." Kenshin replied.
"One last time? What does that mean? Kenshin?" Kaoru was very confused. Kenshin's face was now hidden in shadow. The warm smile had left his face. He turned around. What does this all mean? Kaoru took a step toward him but she tripped. "Ungh..." She looked up. Kenshin was gone. "Kenshin! Kenshin where are you? KENSHIN!!"

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Kaoru bolted upright. "Woah!" She heard Yahiko yell as he fell back in surprise. She slowly looked around and saw that she was back at the Kamiya dojo, in her room. Megumi, Sanosuke and Yahiko were sitting around her, all looking very shocked. "Megumi, Sanosuke, Yahiko... What... happened?" Kaoru said weakly. Recovering from the shock of seeing Kaoru suddenly wake up into life like a zombie, Sanosuke explained the situation.
"Well, you stupidly ran around playing in the rain and got yourself seriously sick."
"But she was already seriously sick in the head." Yahiko said, grinning slyly. Megumi snickered.
"When I get my hands on you...!" Kaoru said, swiping at Yahiko.
"ANYWAY," Sanosuke interrupted, "Luckily, Megumi was on her way home from seeing a patient and she saw you and brought you back here. You got a really bad fever and slept for three whole days."
"Three whole days? I slept for that long? So I only dreamt that it was ten years into the future..."
"Talking about sleep," Megumi said, feeling Kaoru's forehead, "I think that we all need some sleep right now. It's getting late... looks like your fever is subsiding... just get plenty of rest and you'll be fine." Everyone got up to leave.
"Thank you everyone." Kaoru said before they reached the door. Sanosuke waved the back of his hand at her in response before he left. Yahiko turned around and said, "Just get better ok?" He smiled at her and she nodded. Megumi waited until Yahiko left then she turned around to Kaoru.
"Don't worry about Sir Ken." She smiled then left too. Kaoru sat there, confused at what Megumi had just said. Then she remembered the letter.
"Kenshin..." She sighed.

The night seemed to drag on extremely slowly. No matter how hard she tried, Kaoru couldn't get to sleep. She lay there, staring at the ceiling for what seemed like ages. Finally she couldn't take it anymore. She got out of bed and walked to the front doors of the dojo. What am I doing? She left the dojo and walked around the streets. Where am I going? It felt like she had been wandering around for an hour when she abruptly stopped walking. Kaoru found herself standing on the pathway that had cherry blossom trees on either side - just like in her dream! It was even more beautiful than the dream. The moon shone brightly, reflecting the flower petals that were falling silently from the trees. The pathway was lit by a pale glow. It felt so mysterious and romantic. Kaoru closed her eyes and smiled, and for a moment, forgot the world around her. It was so peaceful. Then she heard footsteps. She looked up and her eyes widened. It can't be! It was... it was Kenshin!

"Kenshin!!" Kaoru cried and ran toward him.
"Oro?" Surprised, Kenshin looked up to see a frantic girl running toward him and... right into him! Kaoru slammed right into Kenshin and hugged him tight. He nearly had the wind knocked out of him.
"Kaoru-dono! W... what are you doing here?"
Tears were running down her face, but this time they were tears of joy. "I thought... I thought... the letter... I never thought I'd see you again!" She managed to say through her sobs. She buried her face into his shirt and cried. Kenshin was bewildered but he never drew back. He held her until she stopped crying. Then she looked up. He was smiling at her, gently. He wiped away her tears with the back of his hand.
"Why did you think that I had left for good? The letter? I think you misread it." Kenshin said softly.
"Misread it? How...?" Kaoru answered confusedly.
"Well, my letter read 'To my family, I have a lot on my mind right now and I need time to think. I'm leaving this place for a few days but don't think that I won't return. I'm sorry if I made you all worry. See you all in a few days.' That it did." He looked down at her and smiled. She gasped with shock.
"I... I didn't know that..." She turned away to hide her reddening face. How foolish she had been, thinking that he had left for good. Kenshin came up to to her and held her tightly. He leaned in closer to her and whispered in her ear, "I would never leave you Kaoru, not even for the world." Then he bent over and kissed her softly on the lips, for the first time. Her heart was racing and her face felt hot but she kissed him back, tenderly. It was a long time before they drew back and Kaoru felt so warm inside. They walked back to the dojo together, hand in hand. Now Kaoru knew, she knew that she would never be lonely again

So how was it. Please Read and Review