Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha or any of it's characters

Ch. 11 "Pursuing Forgiveness"

Sango and Miroku didn't stay long after the fight. Once they heard all that had happened from Kagome they left to go start a new life. Sango was excited because she could start a home-run demon hunting business near the castle, that way they could visit often. Although it was a little sad that they weren't ever going to be as close as they used to be traveling together it was a comfort they weren't far away.

Shippou in the meantime was immediately bonding with Rin and had started playing a little game of tag amongst the roses. Kagome took the alone time to sort out her feelings. In truth a lot had happened in those few precious minutes she intervened in battle. Not only has she denied her first love and banished him from her life for good, but she had disobeyed Sesshoumaru. Not that she really cared about his orders but more the repercussions. He was after all, her now only protector and dominant male figure. She knew he was probably angry with her, ruining his epic dream fight with Inuyasha, the pinnacle of his training wasted. Truth is, she hadn't really thought about what she was doing until it was already done. She hoped that Sesshoumaru wouldn't be too livid, she would very much like to keep her life. She knew that at the very least she should try to make it up to him. But how to you make something like that up to a demon lord? After all, what could Sesshoumaru possible want or need that she could give him?

One thing that delighted Kagome to no end was that Sango had brought Kagome her backpack! 'YES! Underwear, bras, and deodorant!' Kagome thought with glee. Kagome hoisted her bag over one shoulder, caught both children and brought them both inside for lunch, and after lunch gave Shippou the grand tour, bypassing the study.

By dinner Sesshoumaru still hadn't appeared from the confines of his study, nor did he take dinner there. Kagome was worried, and so after she put the children to bed she slowly made her way to the study. Traveling the all too familiar path she soon reached the magnificent oak doors, locked tight, an impenetrable wall. Being a nosy girl of the future she did what any normal women does when the door they wish to enter is locked, she stuck her ear to the door and listened. On the other side she heard a voice, it sounded whiny, frightened and croakish. The pattering of little feet warned her to move out of the way of the door just in time as Jaken stormed out and ran off. A little nervous by Jaken's exit, believing Sesshoumaru's temper caused it, Kagome slowly eased around the door and lightly knocked on the echoing wood frame, bowing her head.

"Sesshoumaru-sama? Can I speak with you?" she said as even toned as possible. But all she heard was silence, like the room was too shocked for words. Then a meek voice stuttered,

"Ummm..." It was timid, and definitely female. Kagome's head shot up and she quickly scanned the room for the voice. Sesshoumaru was no where in sight, and the maid was cleaning away the remnants of what was left of Sesshoumaru's dinner. A little annoyed at being embarassed Kagome quickly asked.

"Why was Jaken in here?"

"He wanted to know where Sesshoumaru-sama was. But he left before I came in. Jaken was angry because Sesshoumaru-sama did not tell him where he was going" said the maid, now recovered from her confusement.

Kagome quickly left in search of Sesshoumaru, feeling incredibly stupid about the stunt she had just pulled in front of the maid. If she had been in the maid's shoes she would have fell on the floor laughing, but people of this era are much more polite. But she did have one up on Jaken, she knew where Sesshoumaru should be if not in his study, so off to the gardens she went. Through the walls of flowers, over the embankment and past the sundial to the dojo. When she arrived to the open shoji screen she peeked her head around the edge this time to make sure she didn't embarrass herself again. Inside, Sesshoumaru stood in shadows, an imposing monument to his surroundings. The only animation to his stoic form was the glittering of moonlight of tensaiga's blade as he turned it over and over in his hands. His eyes intently studying it, as if it alone held the secret to the universe. Feeling much like a spectator instead of an active character in this story, Kagome took some time to study the great lord. He was very tall, lean with perfect rippling muscles in all the right places. He always wore outfits that draped perfectly, just enough to let you know he was built, but not enough to let you know just how much. It was a deception, like how women of her time wear black to trick men into thinking they're thinner. His hair was flawless, almost endless silken strands of silver, flowing like a river in the moonlight down his straight back. Eyes that set afire to everything they sought out, a look to kill, a look to capture. He was truly a fine specimen of masculinity, the ultimate amongst men, and yet the most untouchable. At least she knew that though untouchable, he was not unfeeling, otherwise he wouldn't have Rin, or need of her.

"Gomen nasai," Kagome spoke softly from her vantage point, not even bothering the bow. It was silent for a minute.

"For what?" came Sesshoumaru's blank reply.

"Well for starters, blatantly disobeying your orders in front of your hated enemy, for ruining your glorius battle that you've been training for, effectively denying you the one thing you wanted most!" Kagome thought she had died and hadn't yet realized it by Sesshoumaru's swift fingertips when she heard what next escaped his perfect lips. - a chuckle - Then an almost saddistic tone came out.

"Your sorry? Really now, are you also sorry for saving my life and teaching Rin?"

"... yes?" Kagome said completely confused by Sesshoumaru's mind game.

Sesshoumaru sheathed tensaiga at his hip and closed the distance between himself and Kagome. Gently he reached his hand down and removed a stray hair from her forehead and tucked it behind her ear. His face never moved, not an ounce of expression was reflected in Kagome's questioning eyes. As quickly as the gesture was made it was over and Sesshoumaru glided out into the flowers. Before he disappeared from sight Sesshoumaru uttered one last order.

"Don't ever say your sorry again."

Kagome didn't know what to do after that. Not only was she confused by Sesshoumaru's behavior but he had touched her, well not really touched, but her hair! On top of that she was angry, how dare he order her to do anything, and why would he order her to not do something as odd as saying she was sorry. She decided then and there that she would truly never understand this enigmatic youkai.