Thanks to all of my reviewers, I couldn't do it without you.

Dimgwrthien: Thanks.

Emerald Jade2: Well, what d'you think this is? :)

Serpent of Light: Yes, that's sort of what I was aiming for. Teehee.

orligurl88: Confusing? Well, I suppose I can see it, yes...

GaeaMalfoy: No, I don't remember you...Just kidding, of course. How could I forget? (Just think...Voldy/Duddy slash...*muah*) Reading Roman Holiday? Good girl. ^___~ Hope Life's treating you well, drop me a line if you feel like talking...There was some other whacked-out pairing I wanted to intro you to, but damned if I can remember it right now...if I think of it I'll e-mail you (no doubt at three in the morning when I suddenly wake up and go, "that's it!!").

Electryone: Thank you again for your reviews - reviews from the authors I admire and read quite a lot really cheer me up. ^_^

And onto the story...

FANFICTION LOUNGE, HARRY POTTER

"Not AGAIN!" screamed Draco, as he shoved the door open with all his might. It swung back viciously and slammed into the wall, then bounced back and hit him in the face. "I'm supposed to make INTIMIDATING entrances, not get giant slabs of wood we call doors swung back into my-bloody-face!"

He dragged his feet as everyone's attention was diverted from their argument to him. "What?" he demanded, annoyed.

Harry's eyebrows lifted and his eyes slowly, meaningfully, lingered first on Draco's face and then made their way down to his feet, hastily skipping over certain places in between.

"It's not as if it doesn't happen every week!" Draco fumed, casting a 'weightlessness charm' on Lucius and Voldemort, who were both hanging onto his left and right ankles, respectively, and kicked at the back wall. They went flying off, along with Draco's shoes, and smacked noisily against the old whitewashed wall. The large banner proclaiming, "ROWLING CHARACTERS' UNION: Hogwarts Chapter, Harry Potter", rips from its ancient sticking spell and falls off the wall to land atop Draco's shoes, father and 'Master'.

"Pity," said James dispassionately, shooting a glance at Draco. "We know how you loved those shoes."

"Yes, well, I had to buy a new pair anyway, the left one has a scratch on it and the right one was the one Voldemort was spit-shining."

"WHO was spit-shining WHAT?" Ginny Weasley asked curiously, making her own entrance quietly and waving a wand at the back, summoning a small snack for her and Neville, who was two steps behind her and looking much older and much more mature.

Draco rolled his eyes. "It's called sarcasm, wench."

"HEY!" bellowed Ron, and Draco just shrugged.

It was then that Blaise Zabini made an entrance. "I'm getting tired of being a s/he/it!" s/he fumed. "It's not fair! I'm going on strike until Rowling decides to give me a gender!"

Everything stopped dead and only crickets chirped in the background. They wondered if s/he could really address their great Maker as simply 'Rowling' and with such disrespect.

The lights dimmed and a loud, booming female voice said, "Such disrespect, Zabini! So you want to know the truth? You're an ALIEN!"

And then the effect was ruined by the voice's laughter at Zabini's look of horror.

"Yes! That's the truth!" laughed the voice wickedly.

"No! No! Say it isn't true!"

"No? Then, would you rather be a...gnome??" the voice laughed again and suddenly in Blaise's place stood a gnome.

It squealed with displeasure and Ron sighed. "I'll bet that this is Fred and George's doing."

"And I like Blaise!" Harry added.

The voice sighed. "Oh, alright..."

And Blaise turned back into Blaise...but still sans a gender.

"You're not J.K. Rowling!!" Blaise accused, and the voice laughed once more as the lights came on again to reveal a Muggle device in the centre of the room, set up on a table, projecting something not-so-Muggle onto one of the other walls.

"Brought to you by the Weasley's Wizard Wheezes," read Harry aloud, just as the words changed and twisted into the faces of Fred and George.

"Gred and Forge Weasley, Founders. Harry Potter, Co-Founder and Generous Patron," he continued, his voice trailing off as he got to the end.

"So," said Molly, rising from a chair, having slipped in sometime during the complete mayhem. "YOU'RE the one responsible for their new funds. Harry, I am ashamed of you!" she exclaimed, just as everyone else who had ever tested a "wheeze" for Fred and/or George, whether willingly or unwillingly, turned towards Harry with a murderous look in their eyes.

They broke into a run around the massive hall, chasing Harry.

"You can't do this!" he screamed at them. "I have to live to defeat Voldemort!"

"No, you don't!"

Voldemort slowly sat up underneath the banner and looked around, bewildered, at the people sprinting around the room.

He stuck his thumb into his mouth and began to suck on it.

"I want my Mommy."