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Chapter Three
Sirius awoke with a start later the next day from a nightmare of Azkaban. He quivered and shook the blanket off to get Lupin.
When he did, and it amazed him how much better he was feeling despite the dream, a memory from their years at Hogwarts sparked in his brain. Grinning wildly, he encroached into Remus's space stealthily before grabbing him from around the neck.
"Miss me Moony?" he said with his chin in the man's graying hair.
"More than you'd believe..." The tone of his voice made Sirius sober, and he slipped his arms away to sit beside him.
"What's wrong?" he inquired, hands on his knees.
He sighed and answered back a bit sharply; "I just forgot how discrimination feels, that's all."
Sirius narrowed his eyes at that. "What happened while I was sleeping?"
"Nothing. Nothing. Like I said, I just forgot for a bit about my little gift." He laughed in spite of himself, calling it a 'gift'.
"You know that I don't give a damn about what you a-"
"I know. That's why I'd rather you forget about it, okay?" Remus stared stonily into the other man's eyes. Sirius sighed and looked away.
"Fine."
A little chill of silence crept between them as Remus began breakfast for them both. It wasn't until they began to eat that Sirius broke it, remembering another important person in his life.
"Harry."
"What?" the werewolf asked baffled.
"Harry. I should write to him. He needs to know that I'm somewhere safe. I owe that to him, at least."
"All right. I'll get the things you need. Be right back."
As Remus exited the kitchen, Sirius let his brain wander. He wanted so badly to remember. His time in Azkaban had obviously taken a toll on him, one of those things being his memories. He recalled next to nothing of what had happened before he was imprisoned; only the fact those things had existed.
Remus returned quickly, and Sirius wasn't able to linger any longer on his feelings. It was Harry he should be thinking of for the next few moments.
As he finished the letter, Remus brought up lightly, "So... are you all right?"
The Azkaban escapee was a bit startled by the question. "Yes... I'm much better than yesterday. There are some things that won't go away for a while, but... a good rest helped a lot."
Remus smiled. "I'm glad. Because I was thinking, and... you can't stay with me forever. It would be bad for both of us."
"I know." Sirius had had similar thoughts but had not voiced them. He hadn't wanted to. He didn't want to leave. Not yet; not so soon after being reunited with someone from his past. "Not yet."
"No. Not right away, but..." Remus trailed off, leaving the rest unspoken. "but eventually."
"I'd like to recover my memories first."
"Memories? You mean that you can't remember things?" Remus replied, startled.
"Yeah, I can't... I know vague things up to when I was arrested, but nothing detailed. Although it's helping, being here with you." Sirius smiled lightly. Remus returned it.
"I'm glad. So... you don't remember anything of-"
"No. Nothing. But I'm hoping those are the first to return."
"I do too," Remus whispered.
Within a few days, the two men had gathered all of Remus's belongings together. Remus had decided it was time for him to move again. It had become a routine thing for Remus; he always had to leave once the town had found out what he was. He never tried to become too attached to any certain town or home. It was harder than he thought, and it got harder every time.
Sirius would be living with Remus for at least a short while, but like they had discussed he would have to leave on his own eventually to protect the both of them.
Sirius heaved another box onto the still-dusty couch, making him sneeze.
"So... this is really all of it? It's less than I thought," Sirius asked Remus, as the man in question finished taping another box.
"Yeah. I told you- I don't have time to get too attached anywhere so I don't have many personal things."
"Like this?" Sirius tauntingly held up a picture that had fallen out of an album.
"Okay... so some things are nice to keep a hold of..." Remus smiled faintly as he took the picture. It was of the two of them sleeping. Sirius was sprawled all over the bed, and Remus was being held possessively with one arm. James had blackmailed them with that picture in their Marauder Days. How he had gotten the picture, neither of them ever found out. Remus and Sirius had finally gotten the picture away from James after a little blackmailing of their own. Namely, telling Lily about his attraction to her. Of course, things had all worked out in the end anyway.
But… Sirius didn't remember any of it? Not even this instance? Nothing of anything?
"Sirius... are you sure you don't remember anything of us? Absolutely nothing?"
The convict looked crestfallen. "No... I... wish I did, believe me."
"What if..." Remus looked away, but Sirius had been able to tell what he had been about to ask. He leaned closer, and brushed his lips against Remus's before deepening it.
Nothing. No sparks of memory; no sudden recollections.
"Nothing," he murmured.
Remus's eyes saddened.
"I still can't remember. Why can't I remember, Moony?" Sirius collapsed to the ground and leaned against Remus's legs. "Why?"
Remus reached down to grasp Sirius's chin. "You will. I know they'll come back. They're too important for you to forget." He got down on the ground and grasped the other man around the waist. "Much too important." Remus rubbed his back sensually with his fingertips, sending shivers up Sirius's spine. "And we can always make new ones if we have to," he whispered into his ear.
"Of course..." the Animagus replied, playing with the collar of the werewolf's shirt. Slipping his hands in under Remus's loose shirt, he slid his palms up and down the man's chest. He leaned forward and laid his head on Remus's shoulder. He closed his eyes. "But not now. I'm too tired. And-"
Remus suddenly tightened the embrace- squeezing him firmly, almost painfully- while he nuzzled the back of his neck.
"All right. Just don't take too long. I don't know how much longer I can wait."
Remus and Sirius began a search the next few days for available apartments or small flats for Remus's next new place. Searching through newspapers, a wild thought went through both of their minds. Living together. But it was impossible, like they had already established it to be. Sirius was a criminal on the run. He'd endanger both of them, Sirius wouldn't do that to Remus, and Remus wouldn't be that needy. So neither had said a word about it.
"What about this one? It's in Muggle London. Have you tried that yet? Living amongst Muggles?" Sirius suggested.
"I've thought about it. But it's so dangerous… and how do I explain the monthly absences if I decide to get a job?"
"You could always make up something. A disease or something. You know… it's a lot like PMS for men," Sirius mused before Remus smacked him.
"And what is that supposed to mean?!" he retorted indignantly.
"That's exactly what I mean! You get all bitchy and whiny around the full moon!" Sirius teased.
"I do not!"
"Plus, you get a lot hornier too."
"I… what?!" Remus blinked. "How do you know that? I thought you forgot everything!"
"Eh… I remember THAT much, and I am starting to recall some things. Especially full moons. Damn, you were so weird around that time! And you'd never remember afterward! You wouldn't believe some of the things that happened…" Sirius trailed off, leaving the rest to the imagination.
Remus reddened. "You've never told me that before."
"Why did I have to? I thought you'd assume that Padfoot and Moony weren't always innocent."
"Bloody Hell Sirius!!"
He just chuckled as he flipped the page.
*smiles* Fluff is always nice. I hope everyone liked that little reprieve from Remus's unfair treating. *frowns* It was a bit shorter than I'd wanted, but I'll try to make future chapters longer. Keyword, TRY. ^^;;; I'd also appreciate if anyone could help me with the title... anything I could try, seriously. I'm horrible at summaries (which includes titles).
Ah well, 'till next time. Jaa.
Chapter Three
Sirius awoke with a start later the next day from a nightmare of Azkaban. He quivered and shook the blanket off to get Lupin.
When he did, and it amazed him how much better he was feeling despite the dream, a memory from their years at Hogwarts sparked in his brain. Grinning wildly, he encroached into Remus's space stealthily before grabbing him from around the neck.
"Miss me Moony?" he said with his chin in the man's graying hair.
"More than you'd believe..." The tone of his voice made Sirius sober, and he slipped his arms away to sit beside him.
"What's wrong?" he inquired, hands on his knees.
He sighed and answered back a bit sharply; "I just forgot how discrimination feels, that's all."
Sirius narrowed his eyes at that. "What happened while I was sleeping?"
"Nothing. Nothing. Like I said, I just forgot for a bit about my little gift." He laughed in spite of himself, calling it a 'gift'.
"You know that I don't give a damn about what you a-"
"I know. That's why I'd rather you forget about it, okay?" Remus stared stonily into the other man's eyes. Sirius sighed and looked away.
"Fine."
A little chill of silence crept between them as Remus began breakfast for them both. It wasn't until they began to eat that Sirius broke it, remembering another important person in his life.
"Harry."
"What?" the werewolf asked baffled.
"Harry. I should write to him. He needs to know that I'm somewhere safe. I owe that to him, at least."
"All right. I'll get the things you need. Be right back."
As Remus exited the kitchen, Sirius let his brain wander. He wanted so badly to remember. His time in Azkaban had obviously taken a toll on him, one of those things being his memories. He recalled next to nothing of what had happened before he was imprisoned; only the fact those things had existed.
Remus returned quickly, and Sirius wasn't able to linger any longer on his feelings. It was Harry he should be thinking of for the next few moments.
As he finished the letter, Remus brought up lightly, "So... are you all right?"
The Azkaban escapee was a bit startled by the question. "Yes... I'm much better than yesterday. There are some things that won't go away for a while, but... a good rest helped a lot."
Remus smiled. "I'm glad. Because I was thinking, and... you can't stay with me forever. It would be bad for both of us."
"I know." Sirius had had similar thoughts but had not voiced them. He hadn't wanted to. He didn't want to leave. Not yet; not so soon after being reunited with someone from his past. "Not yet."
"No. Not right away, but..." Remus trailed off, leaving the rest unspoken. "but eventually."
"I'd like to recover my memories first."
"Memories? You mean that you can't remember things?" Remus replied, startled.
"Yeah, I can't... I know vague things up to when I was arrested, but nothing detailed. Although it's helping, being here with you." Sirius smiled lightly. Remus returned it.
"I'm glad. So... you don't remember anything of-"
"No. Nothing. But I'm hoping those are the first to return."
"I do too," Remus whispered.
Within a few days, the two men had gathered all of Remus's belongings together. Remus had decided it was time for him to move again. It had become a routine thing for Remus; he always had to leave once the town had found out what he was. He never tried to become too attached to any certain town or home. It was harder than he thought, and it got harder every time.
Sirius would be living with Remus for at least a short while, but like they had discussed he would have to leave on his own eventually to protect the both of them.
Sirius heaved another box onto the still-dusty couch, making him sneeze.
"So... this is really all of it? It's less than I thought," Sirius asked Remus, as the man in question finished taping another box.
"Yeah. I told you- I don't have time to get too attached anywhere so I don't have many personal things."
"Like this?" Sirius tauntingly held up a picture that had fallen out of an album.
"Okay... so some things are nice to keep a hold of..." Remus smiled faintly as he took the picture. It was of the two of them sleeping. Sirius was sprawled all over the bed, and Remus was being held possessively with one arm. James had blackmailed them with that picture in their Marauder Days. How he had gotten the picture, neither of them ever found out. Remus and Sirius had finally gotten the picture away from James after a little blackmailing of their own. Namely, telling Lily about his attraction to her. Of course, things had all worked out in the end anyway.
But… Sirius didn't remember any of it? Not even this instance? Nothing of anything?
"Sirius... are you sure you don't remember anything of us? Absolutely nothing?"
The convict looked crestfallen. "No... I... wish I did, believe me."
"What if..." Remus looked away, but Sirius had been able to tell what he had been about to ask. He leaned closer, and brushed his lips against Remus's before deepening it.
Nothing. No sparks of memory; no sudden recollections.
"Nothing," he murmured.
Remus's eyes saddened.
"I still can't remember. Why can't I remember, Moony?" Sirius collapsed to the ground and leaned against Remus's legs. "Why?"
Remus reached down to grasp Sirius's chin. "You will. I know they'll come back. They're too important for you to forget." He got down on the ground and grasped the other man around the waist. "Much too important." Remus rubbed his back sensually with his fingertips, sending shivers up Sirius's spine. "And we can always make new ones if we have to," he whispered into his ear.
"Of course..." the Animagus replied, playing with the collar of the werewolf's shirt. Slipping his hands in under Remus's loose shirt, he slid his palms up and down the man's chest. He leaned forward and laid his head on Remus's shoulder. He closed his eyes. "But not now. I'm too tired. And-"
Remus suddenly tightened the embrace- squeezing him firmly, almost painfully- while he nuzzled the back of his neck.
"All right. Just don't take too long. I don't know how much longer I can wait."
Remus and Sirius began a search the next few days for available apartments or small flats for Remus's next new place. Searching through newspapers, a wild thought went through both of their minds. Living together. But it was impossible, like they had already established it to be. Sirius was a criminal on the run. He'd endanger both of them, Sirius wouldn't do that to Remus, and Remus wouldn't be that needy. So neither had said a word about it.
"What about this one? It's in Muggle London. Have you tried that yet? Living amongst Muggles?" Sirius suggested.
"I've thought about it. But it's so dangerous… and how do I explain the monthly absences if I decide to get a job?"
"You could always make up something. A disease or something. You know… it's a lot like PMS for men," Sirius mused before Remus smacked him.
"And what is that supposed to mean?!" he retorted indignantly.
"That's exactly what I mean! You get all bitchy and whiny around the full moon!" Sirius teased.
"I do not!"
"Plus, you get a lot hornier too."
"I… what?!" Remus blinked. "How do you know that? I thought you forgot everything!"
"Eh… I remember THAT much, and I am starting to recall some things. Especially full moons. Damn, you were so weird around that time! And you'd never remember afterward! You wouldn't believe some of the things that happened…" Sirius trailed off, leaving the rest to the imagination.
Remus reddened. "You've never told me that before."
"Why did I have to? I thought you'd assume that Padfoot and Moony weren't always innocent."
"Bloody Hell Sirius!!"
He just chuckled as he flipped the page.
*smiles* Fluff is always nice. I hope everyone liked that little reprieve from Remus's unfair treating. *frowns* It was a bit shorter than I'd wanted, but I'll try to make future chapters longer. Keyword, TRY. ^^;;; I'd also appreciate if anyone could help me with the title... anything I could try, seriously. I'm horrible at summaries (which includes titles).
Ah well, 'till next time. Jaa.