Disclaimer: Spirited Away isn't mine! I just love Haku and Chihiro!
becoming flesh
by miyamoto yui
Chapter 2 - touching my dream
I continued to watch him while pushing his bangs away from his face. Leaning closer, I studied his face and wondered what the heck was I supposed to do at the moment.
How was I going to explain to my parents that there was a boy in my room? And more than that, how was I supposed to explain that he came from another world? The one they got me stuck in when they ate the food set aside for the gods?
It wasn't going to happen.
So what was I going to do?
"I know!" I whispered a little bit too loudly.
Before I got up, I closed my eyes again to kiss Haku on the forehead again. I still couldn't believe he was here.
Yes, this was Haku.
The same person with the smell of the ocean and wind around him...
I got up and tiptoed around the house to a room that was used for storage. Turning on the light switch, I searched around for the boxes with my dad's old clothes. He always told me, "Maybe I'll be able to wear them again sometime."
I found them and opened them. Thank goodness he kept them!
I took out a duffel bag and stuffed a few shirts and pants in them for Haku. "Maybe they're a little big, but this will have to do," I said to myself.
I laughed also at the thought of what Haku would look like with these clothes.
But I frowned in the next moment. The words the spirit said and Haku's life...
Years ago, I came to his world and felt so out of place, but he never made me feel that I was a foreigner. With him, I always felt at home.
Yes...he was going to survive here just fine...
But I was more worried if the time and place would conflict more with Haku rather than the other way around.
I shook my head and got up. "I believe in you," I whispered to myself with a smile.
Then, I went back into my room. I shook him a little, feeling guilty that he couldn't stay here and sleep off his tiredness. I whispered into his ear, "Haku, we have to go before my parents get up."
Haku's eyes slowly opened and he smiled up at me.
"I'm sorry that I can't just let you sleep here-"
He got up while pushing his index finger on my lips with a shake of his head. "Don't worry about it."
I helped him change his clothes and we folded the futon and placed it in the closet. I would wash it later.
I took a medium-sized bag and my wallet with me. With a nod of my head, I took his hand. My heart felt so light, I almost wanted to laugh.
We were running away all over again, only it was in a suburb in Japan.
Before we left, I went to the kitchen and pushed a can of coke into my bag. Then, I took the anpan packaged on our table. "Breakfast," I told him while putting it into my bag too.
After writing an excuse letter to my parents, we quietly left. I wrote that one of my best friend's called in the middle of the night and said the person really needed me.
Walking further and further away, I was relieved that we were getting away from my parents, but I was a little worried if my neighbors saw me slink away with a boy. And, I was holding his hand so familiarly that it wouldn't have been such a good piece of news once my parents found that out.
It wasn't that they'd kill me. Knowing them, they would probably want to get to know him better.
I winced. My parents weren't ever normal...
"Where are we going?" Haku asked as he kept on looking around him like a little boy.
"To my apartment," I answered while searching and praying for a taxi to come our way. It would be expensive, but the trains wouldn't start for hours. "I wish there was a phone nearby."
I took the anpan from my bag, tore it with my teeth, and handed it to Haku after taking one bite for myself.
"I wonder if your rules apply to my world," I laughed while pushing the bread to his lips.
Conveniently, we passed by a trashcan and I threw the plastic away. And miraculously, as we got a little bit further, there was a taxi.
After two cities and a wad of cash, we arrived at my apartment. Immediately, I pulled out a blanket for him to sleep on.
"Why do you live here?" he asked as he tiredly lay down.
"I go to college," I said as I knelt before him and tried to help him lie down. "You came while I was visiting my parents."
Shyly, I smiled as I honestly said, "I came because I wanted to see the amusement park entrance. I just felt like it."
"You heard me calling for you, Chihiro?" he asked as his eyes looked up at mine.
Quite direct as ever, wasn't he?
I nodded slowly. "I had a dream that I went back to see you, but everywhere I looked, you weren't there. But I _knew_ you were there because you kept on calling me."
He blinked his eyes in agreement as he put his hand over mine.
"How did you find me?" I looked at him wondering what he had to go through if he had all these cuts on his body.
"Your scent," he said as he pulled out the hair tie I had given him before Yubaba tested me.
Sleepily closing his eyes, he finally gave out.
He slept for three days straight and my parents were totally disappointed that I didn't stay longer with them. Well, long enough to have lunch and dinner.
My friends wanted to come over, but I tried my best to avoid that from happening. I used the excuse that I needed to work. It wasn't a lie, right?
On the third day, when I came back from work, I found Haku wearing a shirt and jeans. He was standing in front of me as soon as I opened the door. "Haku? Shouldn't you be sleeping?"
I closed the door and took off my shoes while carrying the bag of groceries I had.
He took the groceries and he put them on the table. "I've been awake for a couple of hours."
I stopped putting things into the cupboards and he put the can of soup down back onto the table. "I hope you weren't bored."
Haku shook his head as his usual serious face became bright. "I wasn't! I opened your window and stared out to look at the city. Then, I watched something on what I think is called the tv. TV, correct?"
He pointed at the small tv set in front of my futon.
I nodded my head as I put my hand on my mouth. Things I always took for granted were always amazing me.
I started putting things into my cupboards again.
"I started to read from your bookshelf. And you came home as soon as I was half way through one book," he said while looking at me with a bewildered look. Looking down at the floor, he sighed while telling me, "I'm sorry."
Looking at him, I asked, "Why are you saying sorry to me?"
He still wouldn't look at me. "I know you have your own life here and it's very selfish of me to just suddenly show up thinking I could be a part of it."
I reached out my hand to him. "Haku-:"
He interrupted, "I came here not knowing if you'd accept me."
Then, he looked up and stared straight into my eyes while touching my hand, which I had placed on his shoulder. "But I had to try, Chihiro."
It was then that I saw only a small piece of the struggles that he had done in order to get here. All these silent obstacles that he couldn't tell me of and I felt that he was holding back with all his might.
"Of course I'd accept you," I told him without a second thought. "You never had to think about that, Haku."
I smiled as we touched forehead to forehead with our eyes closed.
Then, a wave of fear washed over me as I held onto his hands. I pulled away from him and we looked at one another. "But what did Yubaba have to say about this?"
I knew she wouldn't have let him go so easily.
"Unexpectedly, she laughed at me." He sighed as he continued, "She told me, 'You want to live _there_? As a _human_? Have you lost your mind?!'"
I felt a little insulted. Two lines appeared between my eyebrows, as they always did when I pouted. "What did she mean by that?"
"Love is foolish when it's useless," he said to me and then he looked away again.
"It's never useless," I countered as I wrapped my arms around him.
"In the world she created, everything has to have a purpose. That means everyone and everything has to work for something else," Haku explained to me while still looking at the ground.
"Does purpose really mean you have to work?" I asked. Even though he explained this to me years ago, I still couldn't believe something's meaning to life was just to work.
"I...I'm not sure..." Haku said with a pained face, fighting against the mentality he had been taught.
I didn't like seeing him this way.
I believed in your guidance while I stayed in your world...
I worked hard for my parents...
I learned the strength within me...
Tighter, I hugged him. "It isn't ever useless. That's where dreams come from."
I glanced at me with a surprised face, at the depth of my answer.
"I wonder what Yubaba's dream was when she made that bathhouse," I asked Haku while he glanced at me with hopeful eyes.
"I don't know about her..." He closed his eyes again and put his hands to my face. "...but I'm touching mine."
tsuzuku...
--
Author's note: I am sorry for the long hiatus. I have a good reason for it: I didn't have Spirited Away under my possession for the longest time. I have watched it again twice to get the feel of the movie as well as get the little details that are important in executing this fic. I want it to be well thought out, but even more, I want it to capture why I love the Haku and Chihiro relationship so much. It never fails to amaze me how in love I am for them in being in love with one another.
Yes, it may seem sappy and all that, but for this title, I think it's appropriate. It seems very in-character for me.
becoming flesh
by miyamoto yui
Chapter 2 - touching my dream
I continued to watch him while pushing his bangs away from his face. Leaning closer, I studied his face and wondered what the heck was I supposed to do at the moment.
How was I going to explain to my parents that there was a boy in my room? And more than that, how was I supposed to explain that he came from another world? The one they got me stuck in when they ate the food set aside for the gods?
It wasn't going to happen.
So what was I going to do?
"I know!" I whispered a little bit too loudly.
Before I got up, I closed my eyes again to kiss Haku on the forehead again. I still couldn't believe he was here.
Yes, this was Haku.
The same person with the smell of the ocean and wind around him...
I got up and tiptoed around the house to a room that was used for storage. Turning on the light switch, I searched around for the boxes with my dad's old clothes. He always told me, "Maybe I'll be able to wear them again sometime."
I found them and opened them. Thank goodness he kept them!
I took out a duffel bag and stuffed a few shirts and pants in them for Haku. "Maybe they're a little big, but this will have to do," I said to myself.
I laughed also at the thought of what Haku would look like with these clothes.
But I frowned in the next moment. The words the spirit said and Haku's life...
Years ago, I came to his world and felt so out of place, but he never made me feel that I was a foreigner. With him, I always felt at home.
Yes...he was going to survive here just fine...
But I was more worried if the time and place would conflict more with Haku rather than the other way around.
I shook my head and got up. "I believe in you," I whispered to myself with a smile.
Then, I went back into my room. I shook him a little, feeling guilty that he couldn't stay here and sleep off his tiredness. I whispered into his ear, "Haku, we have to go before my parents get up."
Haku's eyes slowly opened and he smiled up at me.
"I'm sorry that I can't just let you sleep here-"
He got up while pushing his index finger on my lips with a shake of his head. "Don't worry about it."
I helped him change his clothes and we folded the futon and placed it in the closet. I would wash it later.
I took a medium-sized bag and my wallet with me. With a nod of my head, I took his hand. My heart felt so light, I almost wanted to laugh.
We were running away all over again, only it was in a suburb in Japan.
Before we left, I went to the kitchen and pushed a can of coke into my bag. Then, I took the anpan packaged on our table. "Breakfast," I told him while putting it into my bag too.
After writing an excuse letter to my parents, we quietly left. I wrote that one of my best friend's called in the middle of the night and said the person really needed me.
Walking further and further away, I was relieved that we were getting away from my parents, but I was a little worried if my neighbors saw me slink away with a boy. And, I was holding his hand so familiarly that it wouldn't have been such a good piece of news once my parents found that out.
It wasn't that they'd kill me. Knowing them, they would probably want to get to know him better.
I winced. My parents weren't ever normal...
"Where are we going?" Haku asked as he kept on looking around him like a little boy.
"To my apartment," I answered while searching and praying for a taxi to come our way. It would be expensive, but the trains wouldn't start for hours. "I wish there was a phone nearby."
I took the anpan from my bag, tore it with my teeth, and handed it to Haku after taking one bite for myself.
"I wonder if your rules apply to my world," I laughed while pushing the bread to his lips.
Conveniently, we passed by a trashcan and I threw the plastic away. And miraculously, as we got a little bit further, there was a taxi.
After two cities and a wad of cash, we arrived at my apartment. Immediately, I pulled out a blanket for him to sleep on.
"Why do you live here?" he asked as he tiredly lay down.
"I go to college," I said as I knelt before him and tried to help him lie down. "You came while I was visiting my parents."
Shyly, I smiled as I honestly said, "I came because I wanted to see the amusement park entrance. I just felt like it."
"You heard me calling for you, Chihiro?" he asked as his eyes looked up at mine.
Quite direct as ever, wasn't he?
I nodded slowly. "I had a dream that I went back to see you, but everywhere I looked, you weren't there. But I _knew_ you were there because you kept on calling me."
He blinked his eyes in agreement as he put his hand over mine.
"How did you find me?" I looked at him wondering what he had to go through if he had all these cuts on his body.
"Your scent," he said as he pulled out the hair tie I had given him before Yubaba tested me.
Sleepily closing his eyes, he finally gave out.
He slept for three days straight and my parents were totally disappointed that I didn't stay longer with them. Well, long enough to have lunch and dinner.
My friends wanted to come over, but I tried my best to avoid that from happening. I used the excuse that I needed to work. It wasn't a lie, right?
On the third day, when I came back from work, I found Haku wearing a shirt and jeans. He was standing in front of me as soon as I opened the door. "Haku? Shouldn't you be sleeping?"
I closed the door and took off my shoes while carrying the bag of groceries I had.
He took the groceries and he put them on the table. "I've been awake for a couple of hours."
I stopped putting things into the cupboards and he put the can of soup down back onto the table. "I hope you weren't bored."
Haku shook his head as his usual serious face became bright. "I wasn't! I opened your window and stared out to look at the city. Then, I watched something on what I think is called the tv. TV, correct?"
He pointed at the small tv set in front of my futon.
I nodded my head as I put my hand on my mouth. Things I always took for granted were always amazing me.
I started putting things into my cupboards again.
"I started to read from your bookshelf. And you came home as soon as I was half way through one book," he said while looking at me with a bewildered look. Looking down at the floor, he sighed while telling me, "I'm sorry."
Looking at him, I asked, "Why are you saying sorry to me?"
He still wouldn't look at me. "I know you have your own life here and it's very selfish of me to just suddenly show up thinking I could be a part of it."
I reached out my hand to him. "Haku-:"
He interrupted, "I came here not knowing if you'd accept me."
Then, he looked up and stared straight into my eyes while touching my hand, which I had placed on his shoulder. "But I had to try, Chihiro."
It was then that I saw only a small piece of the struggles that he had done in order to get here. All these silent obstacles that he couldn't tell me of and I felt that he was holding back with all his might.
"Of course I'd accept you," I told him without a second thought. "You never had to think about that, Haku."
I smiled as we touched forehead to forehead with our eyes closed.
Then, a wave of fear washed over me as I held onto his hands. I pulled away from him and we looked at one another. "But what did Yubaba have to say about this?"
I knew she wouldn't have let him go so easily.
"Unexpectedly, she laughed at me." He sighed as he continued, "She told me, 'You want to live _there_? As a _human_? Have you lost your mind?!'"
I felt a little insulted. Two lines appeared between my eyebrows, as they always did when I pouted. "What did she mean by that?"
"Love is foolish when it's useless," he said to me and then he looked away again.
"It's never useless," I countered as I wrapped my arms around him.
"In the world she created, everything has to have a purpose. That means everyone and everything has to work for something else," Haku explained to me while still looking at the ground.
"Does purpose really mean you have to work?" I asked. Even though he explained this to me years ago, I still couldn't believe something's meaning to life was just to work.
"I...I'm not sure..." Haku said with a pained face, fighting against the mentality he had been taught.
I didn't like seeing him this way.
I believed in your guidance while I stayed in your world...
I worked hard for my parents...
I learned the strength within me...
Tighter, I hugged him. "It isn't ever useless. That's where dreams come from."
I glanced at me with a surprised face, at the depth of my answer.
"I wonder what Yubaba's dream was when she made that bathhouse," I asked Haku while he glanced at me with hopeful eyes.
"I don't know about her..." He closed his eyes again and put his hands to my face. "...but I'm touching mine."
tsuzuku...
--
Author's note: I am sorry for the long hiatus. I have a good reason for it: I didn't have Spirited Away under my possession for the longest time. I have watched it again twice to get the feel of the movie as well as get the little details that are important in executing this fic. I want it to be well thought out, but even more, I want it to capture why I love the Haku and Chihiro relationship so much. It never fails to amaze me how in love I am for them in being in love with one another.
Yes, it may seem sappy and all that, but for this title, I think it's appropriate. It seems very in-character for me.