Flirting With Death - Chapter 4
Author's Note: I got a review saying that Aku wasn't potrayed realistically. Thank you very much, Mr. I-Sent-Masquerade-A-Flame-And-I'm- Too-Chicken-To-Put-My-Name-Up, who wasn't flaming me at all. It's true, now that I look at it. Aku wouldn't really waste his time with someone who gave him no respect (with the exception of young children whom he told fractured fairy tales to for some support with no results. Hee hee.). It's probably too late to say this, but Aku is OOC in this story. Hope that covered everything.
P.S. I don't hate Aku. I love the guy, he's one of my favorite villans. I also love poking fun at my favorite villans, which may come off as bashing. It isn't bashing, it's just good clean fun. So there.
--------------------------------
Rancor found herself and Aku in an open field. Butter yellow grass that came up to her ankle boots was all around them, along with the occasional fall colored tree.
Nothing looked threatening here.......
"Ah," Rancor sighed, stretching her arms out, "nice and peaceful. Makes me want to go to sleep under a tree and....."
Aku suddenly fired a shot from his eyes, and the beams hit Rancor's arm. She yelped, and covered the burn with her hand.
"HEY! JERK, WHAD'JA DO THAT FOR?!"
Aku turned away from her without a word. She caught a glimpse of a frown as he did.
".......what's going on?"
The pain from the burn ebbed, and she removed her hand to look at it. She blinked at it in surprise. The burn was shaped in an oval, and lines snaked from the top and bottom in the likeness of Aku's horns. Not a natural burn.
She glared at Aku's back.
"Why'd you put your symbol on my arm?! You only do this when........"
".....when I employ a henchmen against his own will." Aku interupted, turning back to her. "Yes, that's right. Which means it is a mark of slavery."
Rancor frowned.
"Hey, wait a minute....."
"I use this in the most extreme of circumstances for this reason:" Aku continued, "once a slave has been marked, and I give them an order........there is no resistance. The slave will do what I command without question or even without a thought." He then grinned. "Oh, the things I can make you do......"
The frown on Rancor's face morphed into a scowl.
"You're kidding! You can give me any order you want, and I'm not going to follow it if I don't wanna. You've got no power over me, Aku. No power at all......"
"Bark like a dog."
Suddenly.....
"Arf! Arf! Arf, arf, arf!"
Rancor's speach became slightly high-pitched barks.
"A big dog." Aku modified.
And....
"Wwwwoof! Wwwwoof!" Her barking went deeper and rougher.
"Sit!"
Rancor positioned herself so she was sitting on her rear with her arms supporting her up.
"Beg!"
Rancor raised her hands up to her chin.
"Roll over!"
Rancor rolled on her side, and went back into the begging position.
"Good dog!"
"Woof!"
"No doggie treat."
Rancor whimpered sadly.
Aku couldn't hold it in anymore. He laughed loud and hard.
"HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA!"
Rancor then blinked a couple times and stood up in outrage!
"HEY! YOU MORON! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU........"
"SILENCE!" Aku ordered.
"..............." Rancor found she suddenly couldn't talk. So, she glared at the demon who was beaming proudly.
"Hee, hee, hee. You see? Any and every command will be obeyed whether you like it or not. And I can do more to you then make you think you're an animal."
"Oh.......you're dead." Rancor growled. "So, very dead.... If you think I'm going to stand for this......"
"BOW BEFORE ME!"
Rancor found herself on her knees.
"WORSHIP ME!"
"Oh, great and mighty Aku! You are the morning and evening star! Your word is law! Your evil is law!"
"Much better. Exactly what I expected of you, Rancor."
She quickly got up as soon as it was over, then started beating herself in the head furiously with her fists.
"No, no, no, no, no! How could I say things like that?! Impure thoughts, impure thoughts, impure thoughts......."
But Aku didn't stop there.
"See that tree?" he pointed at the nearest tree in the area.
"Oh no...." Rancor groaned.
"Knock it down with your head!"
Rancor found herself speeding towards it like a bull charging the madador, and......
BOOM!
Her head collided with the thick trunk, and the recoil sent her tumbling backwards.
"Hee, hee, hee, hee." Aku laughed lightly at her. "You didn't knock it down.....and I want to see it topple over from your head alone!"
Rancor then found herself back on her feet, despite her vision swiming before her, and charging once again for the tree.
Aku watched her smash her head into the tree over and over.
"That should teach you to make such bets with the great Aku! HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA....."
----------------------------
Half an hour later, the tree was finally uprooted and a dazed Rancor was on the ground. The worst headache to hit mankind was throbbing in her head, and her vision was a complete blur. It was slowly coming into focus, but not fast enough.
"ON YOUR FEET!" Aku shouted at her. She stumbled to a stand in an instant, but quickly fell over on her face. She got back up a little more slowly.
Her sight must have been coming back. She could see a large black figure infront of her that was most likely Aku......
"What else could I do to you?" he wondered to himself. "Maybe I can have you knock down all the trees here....."
Rancor groaned. She couldn't see them, but she remembered seeing a good number of them. Make that a bad number, if she was going to knock them down with her head.
Aku turned away from her to think.
"Hmmm.....I could have you worship me until you drop...." he thought. "Maybe I could have you journey through the most disgusting strip of land on Earth...... Maybe I could send you to a far away planet....."
Rancor wiped her sweaty and aching forehead with her marked arm. This was getting more and more miserable.
Then, she felt something thick on her forehead as she took her arm away. It felt like paint..... She wiped her hand on her face and looked at it. It was covered in something like black paint. She blinked then looked at her arm. The "burn" was smudged by her sweat.....
She frowned. Aku tricked her! He made her think he burned a slavery mark on her arm.
She furiously wiped the mark off her arm, surprised to see Aku still coming up with ideas.
'I've got an idea of my own.' she thought as she took the white out bottle out of her pocket.
---------------------------
"I'VE GOT IT!" Aku announced, five mintues later. "I can have you destroy Samurai Jack! Of course!"
Just as he was getting pleased with his idea he came up with a better one.
"No, wait! I can make you ADMIT DEFEAT! I can make you say you lost the bet, and I am the winner! BWA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA!"
He turned to Rancor, pointing a commanding claw at her.
"So, ADMIT DEFEAT, RANCOR!"
But he found she was no longer there.
"Wha....."
He felt something funny on his other arm, and looked. He saw Rancor, sitting comfortably in his elbow joint, finishing up a smiley face on his arm with the white out.
"What is this?!" he growled. She grinned at him over her shoulder.
"Now I've marked you, and now you're my slave." she said.
"Oh?" Aku raised his flaming eyebrows. "Really?"
As Rancor nodded, Aku glared.
"FOOL! Admit you lost the bet, slave!"
Rancor showed her arm to Aku, the arm with the rubbed off mark.
"No. I don't feel like it."
"What in......"
Rancor slid down Aku's arm and hopped back down to the ground as she continued.
"And now that you're my slave, you have to do what I want."
"HA, HA, HA, HA, HA!" Aku laughed. "Fool. You honestly believe the powerful and all commanding Aku would do whatever you say?! This is no slave marking. It is not possible for you to control me....."
"Bark like a dog."
Unbelievably......
"Bark! Bark! Bark!" Aku's speach became slight bark.
Rancor grinned.
"A little dog."
"Yip, yip, yip!" Aku's voice didn't change much. So, Rancor got another idea.
"Turn into a little dog!"
Aku mushed himself to do just that, and he was instantly a little beagle.
"Yip, yip, yip!" he continued in the appropriate voice.
"Sit up." she commaded, and Aku did so. "Lie down, roll over, play dead...good boy!"
"Yip!"
Rancor couldn't take it, she fell over and laughed so hard.
This snapped Aku out of his trance, and he angrily shape shifted back and stood fifty feet tall in front of Rancor.
"HOW DARE YOU! HOW DARE YOU DECIEVE THE MIGHTY AKU!"
"Heh." Rancor grinned. "I haven't even started yet."
"Perhaps I can mark you for real......" Aku threatened, his eyes glowing.
"Turn into a kitten."
Aku then found himself as a fluffy black kitten, and his eye beams were canceled out. Rancor grinned at him.
"Hee, hee. That's a cute look for you. Oh, I got a better one."
"Blah!" Aku snarled, turning into a vicious looking cobra. Not worried at all, Rancor shook her head.
"Turn into a teddy bear."
He suddenly turned into a life-sized teddy bear.
Naturally, Rancor laughed at him. Aku was annoyed enough, and then he heard clicking and saw the flash of bulbs. He turned to see several of his henchmen with cameras taking pictures of him.
Rancor just laughed harder.
Could Aku be any more angrier? Maybe......
"YOU'RE ALL FIRED!" he shouted at the henchmen. "GET OUT OF HERE!"
They all scampered away as Rancor calmed down and Aku changed back to normal.
"Rancor, you will get the punnishment of your life."
She grinned at him.
"That would involve firing me, and I know you won't. You need me, Aku, that's why you've put up with me for so long."
"..........."
"Well, I lasted through that torture easily enough. And I'm not scared of being marked for real. So, any more tricks?"
Aku hesitated.
"Any more ideas?"
He hesitated some more.
Rancor grinned wider.
"So, you've given up?"
"I......" Aku began.
Rancor shook her head.
"I can read you like a book, man." Her grin turned more evil. "This bet is mine."
-----------------------
The next day, Aku was nowhere to be found in his own tower. This was because, as some figured out, he was at the very bottom of the tower.......
......in the torture chambers.
Three curious henchmen traveled down there to find their master. Among the sights in the chamber was a burnt out Demongo hanging by his wrists on a wall rack. He seemed almost lifeless; he didn't even bother to move.
Before the henchmen could ask Demongo anything (not that the poor guy would answer), Rancor appeared from a hallway to a connecting chamber.
"Hi, boys." she greeted. "Failed to defeat Samurai Jack too?"
"Oh, no." Henchman #1 shook his head. "We were just wondering....."
".....what have you done with Aku-sama?" Henchman #2 demanded.
"Yeah." Henchman #3 chimed in. "You haven't hurt him, have you?"
"I wish I could." Rancor sighed. "Anything with the ability to hurt a human being does nothing to him. The damage heals right up. The only thing that could give the man so much as a papercut is Jack's sword. So...." She shrugged, "physical torture is out of the question. Your shogun of sorrow is just fine."
"Then what are you doing to him?" Henchman #2 continued to demand.
As if he was overhearing from the other chamber.....
"NOOOOOO! MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT STOP! AAAAAAAA!"
Rancor grinned.
"Mental torture. Wanna see?"
The three henchmen followed her into the connecting chamber, and she made them watch from outside. Aku was strapped to a chair, eyes forced to stay open with metal clippers, and he was watching something on a TV screen. Something that was driving him to the brink of madness.
He was oddly quiet.
"Uh......dare I ask?" enquired Henchman #1.
"What? What he's watching?" Rancor asked. "Guess."
Aku suddenly screamed again.
"MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT STOP! AAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
"It's a horror movie!" Henchman #1 guessed.
"It's a bad movie!" Henchman #2 guessed.
"It's all the episodes of Samurai Jack with no Aku in it!" Henchman #3 guessed.
"Wrong, wrong, and wrong." Rancor shook her head. "It's the Teletubbies."
All three henchmen turned pale.
"Yep." Rancor smiled. "And he's been on that for 24/7."
All three henchmen shivered, while Rancor looked at her watch.
"And he's got another five minutes to go before I let him out. Then you'll have your Aku-sama back and he'll be perfectly fine. So, let's go and have him suffer for a while longer."
"I hope he'll be perfectly fine......" Henchman #3 sighed as Rancor led them all away.
She smiled to herself as she waved them off.
"Well," she said to herself, "today was rather productive. I showed Aku who's boss, and he's paying the price."
She smiled as Aku screamed out again.
"Oh, yes." she reminded herself. "I also have a new favorite song."
As she closed the door she sang a little to herself......
-----------------
No, I'm no one's wife
But, I love my life
And all.....
That.....
Jazz!
That jazz!
-----------------
The End
Author's Note: I got a review saying that Aku wasn't potrayed realistically. Thank you very much, Mr. I-Sent-Masquerade-A-Flame-And-I'm- Too-Chicken-To-Put-My-Name-Up, who wasn't flaming me at all. It's true, now that I look at it. Aku wouldn't really waste his time with someone who gave him no respect (with the exception of young children whom he told fractured fairy tales to for some support with no results. Hee hee.). It's probably too late to say this, but Aku is OOC in this story. Hope that covered everything.
P.S. I don't hate Aku. I love the guy, he's one of my favorite villans. I also love poking fun at my favorite villans, which may come off as bashing. It isn't bashing, it's just good clean fun. So there.
--------------------------------
Rancor found herself and Aku in an open field. Butter yellow grass that came up to her ankle boots was all around them, along with the occasional fall colored tree.
Nothing looked threatening here.......
"Ah," Rancor sighed, stretching her arms out, "nice and peaceful. Makes me want to go to sleep under a tree and....."
Aku suddenly fired a shot from his eyes, and the beams hit Rancor's arm. She yelped, and covered the burn with her hand.
"HEY! JERK, WHAD'JA DO THAT FOR?!"
Aku turned away from her without a word. She caught a glimpse of a frown as he did.
".......what's going on?"
The pain from the burn ebbed, and she removed her hand to look at it. She blinked at it in surprise. The burn was shaped in an oval, and lines snaked from the top and bottom in the likeness of Aku's horns. Not a natural burn.
She glared at Aku's back.
"Why'd you put your symbol on my arm?! You only do this when........"
".....when I employ a henchmen against his own will." Aku interupted, turning back to her. "Yes, that's right. Which means it is a mark of slavery."
Rancor frowned.
"Hey, wait a minute....."
"I use this in the most extreme of circumstances for this reason:" Aku continued, "once a slave has been marked, and I give them an order........there is no resistance. The slave will do what I command without question or even without a thought." He then grinned. "Oh, the things I can make you do......"
The frown on Rancor's face morphed into a scowl.
"You're kidding! You can give me any order you want, and I'm not going to follow it if I don't wanna. You've got no power over me, Aku. No power at all......"
"Bark like a dog."
Suddenly.....
"Arf! Arf! Arf, arf, arf!"
Rancor's speach became slightly high-pitched barks.
"A big dog." Aku modified.
And....
"Wwwwoof! Wwwwoof!" Her barking went deeper and rougher.
"Sit!"
Rancor positioned herself so she was sitting on her rear with her arms supporting her up.
"Beg!"
Rancor raised her hands up to her chin.
"Roll over!"
Rancor rolled on her side, and went back into the begging position.
"Good dog!"
"Woof!"
"No doggie treat."
Rancor whimpered sadly.
Aku couldn't hold it in anymore. He laughed loud and hard.
"HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA!"
Rancor then blinked a couple times and stood up in outrage!
"HEY! YOU MORON! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU........"
"SILENCE!" Aku ordered.
"..............." Rancor found she suddenly couldn't talk. So, she glared at the demon who was beaming proudly.
"Hee, hee, hee. You see? Any and every command will be obeyed whether you like it or not. And I can do more to you then make you think you're an animal."
"Oh.......you're dead." Rancor growled. "So, very dead.... If you think I'm going to stand for this......"
"BOW BEFORE ME!"
Rancor found herself on her knees.
"WORSHIP ME!"
"Oh, great and mighty Aku! You are the morning and evening star! Your word is law! Your evil is law!"
"Much better. Exactly what I expected of you, Rancor."
She quickly got up as soon as it was over, then started beating herself in the head furiously with her fists.
"No, no, no, no, no! How could I say things like that?! Impure thoughts, impure thoughts, impure thoughts......."
But Aku didn't stop there.
"See that tree?" he pointed at the nearest tree in the area.
"Oh no...." Rancor groaned.
"Knock it down with your head!"
Rancor found herself speeding towards it like a bull charging the madador, and......
BOOM!
Her head collided with the thick trunk, and the recoil sent her tumbling backwards.
"Hee, hee, hee, hee." Aku laughed lightly at her. "You didn't knock it down.....and I want to see it topple over from your head alone!"
Rancor then found herself back on her feet, despite her vision swiming before her, and charging once again for the tree.
Aku watched her smash her head into the tree over and over.
"That should teach you to make such bets with the great Aku! HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA....."
----------------------------
Half an hour later, the tree was finally uprooted and a dazed Rancor was on the ground. The worst headache to hit mankind was throbbing in her head, and her vision was a complete blur. It was slowly coming into focus, but not fast enough.
"ON YOUR FEET!" Aku shouted at her. She stumbled to a stand in an instant, but quickly fell over on her face. She got back up a little more slowly.
Her sight must have been coming back. She could see a large black figure infront of her that was most likely Aku......
"What else could I do to you?" he wondered to himself. "Maybe I can have you knock down all the trees here....."
Rancor groaned. She couldn't see them, but she remembered seeing a good number of them. Make that a bad number, if she was going to knock them down with her head.
Aku turned away from her to think.
"Hmmm.....I could have you worship me until you drop...." he thought. "Maybe I could have you journey through the most disgusting strip of land on Earth...... Maybe I could send you to a far away planet....."
Rancor wiped her sweaty and aching forehead with her marked arm. This was getting more and more miserable.
Then, she felt something thick on her forehead as she took her arm away. It felt like paint..... She wiped her hand on her face and looked at it. It was covered in something like black paint. She blinked then looked at her arm. The "burn" was smudged by her sweat.....
She frowned. Aku tricked her! He made her think he burned a slavery mark on her arm.
She furiously wiped the mark off her arm, surprised to see Aku still coming up with ideas.
'I've got an idea of my own.' she thought as she took the white out bottle out of her pocket.
---------------------------
"I'VE GOT IT!" Aku announced, five mintues later. "I can have you destroy Samurai Jack! Of course!"
Just as he was getting pleased with his idea he came up with a better one.
"No, wait! I can make you ADMIT DEFEAT! I can make you say you lost the bet, and I am the winner! BWA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA!"
He turned to Rancor, pointing a commanding claw at her.
"So, ADMIT DEFEAT, RANCOR!"
But he found she was no longer there.
"Wha....."
He felt something funny on his other arm, and looked. He saw Rancor, sitting comfortably in his elbow joint, finishing up a smiley face on his arm with the white out.
"What is this?!" he growled. She grinned at him over her shoulder.
"Now I've marked you, and now you're my slave." she said.
"Oh?" Aku raised his flaming eyebrows. "Really?"
As Rancor nodded, Aku glared.
"FOOL! Admit you lost the bet, slave!"
Rancor showed her arm to Aku, the arm with the rubbed off mark.
"No. I don't feel like it."
"What in......"
Rancor slid down Aku's arm and hopped back down to the ground as she continued.
"And now that you're my slave, you have to do what I want."
"HA, HA, HA, HA, HA!" Aku laughed. "Fool. You honestly believe the powerful and all commanding Aku would do whatever you say?! This is no slave marking. It is not possible for you to control me....."
"Bark like a dog."
Unbelievably......
"Bark! Bark! Bark!" Aku's speach became slight bark.
Rancor grinned.
"A little dog."
"Yip, yip, yip!" Aku's voice didn't change much. So, Rancor got another idea.
"Turn into a little dog!"
Aku mushed himself to do just that, and he was instantly a little beagle.
"Yip, yip, yip!" he continued in the appropriate voice.
"Sit up." she commaded, and Aku did so. "Lie down, roll over, play dead...good boy!"
"Yip!"
Rancor couldn't take it, she fell over and laughed so hard.
This snapped Aku out of his trance, and he angrily shape shifted back and stood fifty feet tall in front of Rancor.
"HOW DARE YOU! HOW DARE YOU DECIEVE THE MIGHTY AKU!"
"Heh." Rancor grinned. "I haven't even started yet."
"Perhaps I can mark you for real......" Aku threatened, his eyes glowing.
"Turn into a kitten."
Aku then found himself as a fluffy black kitten, and his eye beams were canceled out. Rancor grinned at him.
"Hee, hee. That's a cute look for you. Oh, I got a better one."
"Blah!" Aku snarled, turning into a vicious looking cobra. Not worried at all, Rancor shook her head.
"Turn into a teddy bear."
He suddenly turned into a life-sized teddy bear.
Naturally, Rancor laughed at him. Aku was annoyed enough, and then he heard clicking and saw the flash of bulbs. He turned to see several of his henchmen with cameras taking pictures of him.
Rancor just laughed harder.
Could Aku be any more angrier? Maybe......
"YOU'RE ALL FIRED!" he shouted at the henchmen. "GET OUT OF HERE!"
They all scampered away as Rancor calmed down and Aku changed back to normal.
"Rancor, you will get the punnishment of your life."
She grinned at him.
"That would involve firing me, and I know you won't. You need me, Aku, that's why you've put up with me for so long."
"..........."
"Well, I lasted through that torture easily enough. And I'm not scared of being marked for real. So, any more tricks?"
Aku hesitated.
"Any more ideas?"
He hesitated some more.
Rancor grinned wider.
"So, you've given up?"
"I......" Aku began.
Rancor shook her head.
"I can read you like a book, man." Her grin turned more evil. "This bet is mine."
-----------------------
The next day, Aku was nowhere to be found in his own tower. This was because, as some figured out, he was at the very bottom of the tower.......
......in the torture chambers.
Three curious henchmen traveled down there to find their master. Among the sights in the chamber was a burnt out Demongo hanging by his wrists on a wall rack. He seemed almost lifeless; he didn't even bother to move.
Before the henchmen could ask Demongo anything (not that the poor guy would answer), Rancor appeared from a hallway to a connecting chamber.
"Hi, boys." she greeted. "Failed to defeat Samurai Jack too?"
"Oh, no." Henchman #1 shook his head. "We were just wondering....."
".....what have you done with Aku-sama?" Henchman #2 demanded.
"Yeah." Henchman #3 chimed in. "You haven't hurt him, have you?"
"I wish I could." Rancor sighed. "Anything with the ability to hurt a human being does nothing to him. The damage heals right up. The only thing that could give the man so much as a papercut is Jack's sword. So...." She shrugged, "physical torture is out of the question. Your shogun of sorrow is just fine."
"Then what are you doing to him?" Henchman #2 continued to demand.
As if he was overhearing from the other chamber.....
"NOOOOOO! MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT STOP! AAAAAAAA!"
Rancor grinned.
"Mental torture. Wanna see?"
The three henchmen followed her into the connecting chamber, and she made them watch from outside. Aku was strapped to a chair, eyes forced to stay open with metal clippers, and he was watching something on a TV screen. Something that was driving him to the brink of madness.
He was oddly quiet.
"Uh......dare I ask?" enquired Henchman #1.
"What? What he's watching?" Rancor asked. "Guess."
Aku suddenly screamed again.
"MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT STOP! AAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
"It's a horror movie!" Henchman #1 guessed.
"It's a bad movie!" Henchman #2 guessed.
"It's all the episodes of Samurai Jack with no Aku in it!" Henchman #3 guessed.
"Wrong, wrong, and wrong." Rancor shook her head. "It's the Teletubbies."
All three henchmen turned pale.
"Yep." Rancor smiled. "And he's been on that for 24/7."
All three henchmen shivered, while Rancor looked at her watch.
"And he's got another five minutes to go before I let him out. Then you'll have your Aku-sama back and he'll be perfectly fine. So, let's go and have him suffer for a while longer."
"I hope he'll be perfectly fine......" Henchman #3 sighed as Rancor led them all away.
She smiled to herself as she waved them off.
"Well," she said to herself, "today was rather productive. I showed Aku who's boss, and he's paying the price."
She smiled as Aku screamed out again.
"Oh, yes." she reminded herself. "I also have a new favorite song."
As she closed the door she sang a little to herself......
-----------------
No, I'm no one's wife
But, I love my life
And all.....
That.....
Jazz!
That jazz!
-----------------
The End