DISCLAIMER: I've said it before and I'll say it again—I own nothing related to That '70's Show. Not only that, but I also don't own anything related to Wonder Woman! So there!
Author's Note: This chapter ended up being very long so I've decided to break it up into two parts. Part I is finished so I decided to go ahead and post it now.
Wonder Woman – Part IAnother boring Friday night, Steven Hyde thought to himself. Thank goodness Wonder Woman was on tonight. He lay back on the couch and settled in to watch. He hated to admit it, even to himself, but he was a bit lonely. Eric was still sunk in depression and was spending the evening in his room writing crappy poetry about Donna. Fez was off stalking his latest crush, poor girl. Hyde wondered where Jackie was. Not that he cared, of course, it was just that he had gotten used to her always being around. Well, without Jackie around, he could at least have some peace and quiet, although he did kind of miss her constant rambling. Due to his recent nightmares featuring Jackie, he had started to notice that she had really grown up in the past few years. In fact, she had grown up nicely and in all of the right places. Dammit, he thought to himself. Quit thinking about her! The familiar refrain of the Wonder Woman theme song brought him back to reality.
Alright, he thought. Nothing like a little super-hero woman action to take his mind off a certain pint-sized and irritatingly hot little chick. As the show progressed, however, Hyde found himself dozing off yet again.
DREAM SEQUENCE:
Agent Jackie Prince aka "Princess Jackie/Wonder Woman" entered IADC headquarters. She strode directly to the Chief of Operations office, knocked briefly, and then entered. Eric Forman, the scrawny yet brilliant spymaster, eyed her speculatively. He was still amazed that this tiny young woman had proven to be one of his best operatives. She couldn't have weighed more than 95 lbs yet she always managed to complete her missions, no matter how dangerous. She was a bit too severe looking for his taste, he thought. Her black hair was pulled back into a severe bun; she wore nerdy black-framed glasses, and a severely tailored knee-length black skirt with matching black jacket. A man-tailored white shirt with a thin black tie completed the outfit. Jackie Prince was definitely all business.
He stood to welcome her then asked her to take a seat. A quiet knock on the door and then his gorgeous secretary, Donna, entered. Now she was more to his taste, he thought. Tall, voluptuous, and with long red hair. Made coming to work every day a pleasure. Donna left a tray of coffee, gave Jackie a quick smile and wink, and then sashayed back out the door.
"Ms. Prince, I wanted to congratulate you again on your most recent mission. Your success in capturing that South American spy was of extreme importance to our nation's security. Who would have thought that he would have fallen for the "drugged candy" ruse?"
"Thank you, sir," Jackie said crisply. "I assume you have a new assignment for me, though."
"Jackie, I do wish you would take some time off in between missions. You're a young woman; you need to live a little. Get out, have some fun," he said knowing full well she would refuse any vacation time. She was so serious and business-like all the time. He wondered if she ever let her hair down, both literally and figuratively.
"Thank you, but no, sir. I'd rather be working. I've no interest in frivolous activities." She thought back to her one disastrous and short-lived affair. After Michael, she had no interest in men. She would never understand why they liked sex so much.
"Very well, then," he said with a sigh. "I do actually need your help on something. Have you heard of a theoretical technology called 'Hydromechanical Transportation'?"
"Yes, sir. It's the theory that water can replace petrochemical products for use in both civilian and military transport vehicles."
"Exactly. Well, this young fellow up at the University of Wisconsin has recently achieved a major breakthrough in the field."
"You mean…"
"That's right. He's developed a car that can run on water!" Eric shook his head in wonder. "You see, of course, the military implications of such an invention."
"Of course, sir. This would enable us to not have to rely on oil which would effectively eliminate the oil cartels' stranglehold over us."
"Yes, my dear. And not just us. The Soviets have been working on this for years but with no success. The IADC is very concerned that this young professor could be in danger of being kidnapped by Soviet agents in order to 'extract' his secret formula from him."
"Who is this professor?" Jackie asked curiously.
Eric handed her a slim manila folder. "I'll let you study his dossier in depth later but I'll give you a brief run-down right now. His name is Dr. Steven Hyde, Professor of Hydromechanics at UW. He sometimes goes by his nickname "Wisconsin" Hyde. He teaches very little, having been engaged by the university to focus mainly on research."
Jackie opened the folder to see a photo of the young professor. He had a mop of curly, unruly brownish, blond hair and a scruffy beard. She felt a tingle run down her spine as she focused on his beautiful blue eyes. Oh, my, she thought to herself.
"Jackie, I need you to go up to the University and talk with Dr. Hyde. We need to move him and his lab equipment to a secure location so that his work can continue under government protection. He's been very resistant to our requests so far so I need you to make it very clear to him that he no longer has a choice in the matter. He will work for us, whether he wants to or not. It has now become a matter of national security."
"I'll take care of it, sir. I should be able to make him see reason," Jackie said decisively.
"Good. I've taken the liberty of securing a seat for you on the 5:00pm flight from Washington to Madison. I'll leave it to you on the best way to convince our young man that he must accept our offer of protection and assistance."
The two shook hands and then Jackie briskly exited the office. A new assignment, she thought with relief, just what I needed to take my mind off feeling so lonely lately.
Madison, Wisconsin 9:00 PM
Jackie Prince climbed out of her small rental car with a sigh. She had gone to Dr. Hyde's home upon first arriving in Madison but he had not been home. One of his neighbors told her that the Professor frequently worked very late at the university. Jackie had finally managed to locate his lab, which was tucked away in an isolated corner of the campus. The only other car in the deserted parking lot was a black El Camino. Jackie's heels echoed on the pavement as she made her way to the sprawling one-story building labeled "The Burkhardt Laboratory".
The outer door was open and she cautiously made her way down a cluttered hallway. She heard faint music coming from an area at the back of the building. She entered a large laboratory area and pinpointed the music as coming from a small office in the back of the room. As she stepped in front of the door, she could hear the music more clearly. It was a group called 'Led Zeppelin'. Jackie sniffed with disdain. How could anyone listen to that stuff? she thought. The Captain and Tennille were so much better.
She knocked firmly on the door and heard someone moving about. The music stopped and she heard a voice say, "Just a second!" When the door opened, a cloud of sweet-smelling smoke wafted toward her. The scruffily handsome young man from the dossier stood in the doorway. He was wearing boots, faded jeans, a black tee shirt, and, as a nod to formality, a white lab coat. For the briefest of moments, the two stared at each other. Dr. Steven Hyde saw a severe-looking young woman wearing a skirted business suit and dark-framed glasses, with her black hair pulled back into a bun. After her long day, some tendrils of hair had escaped and hung enticingly about her neck and temples. Hyde looked her up and down and took in her trim figure. Despite her business-like garb, Hyde could tell that she was definitely hot. Oh, yeah, he thought to himself. It's the stern librarian fantasy come to life. Whoa, that was some really good stuff he had just bought. He shook his head to clear it but the fantasy woman was still there. Far out, he thought.
Jackie too was taken aback by the young man standing in front of her. He was taller than she had imagined and his picture really hadn't done him justice.Oh, my gosh! He's gorgeous! She thought to herself. His dossier photo had not shown his broad shoulders, slim waist and nice arms. She too shook her head in an effort to re-establish her focus. Business, she said to herself, you're here on business.
"Dr. Steven Hyde?" she asked. When he nodded, she introduced herself. "I'm Jackie Prince from the IADC." As their hands met for a brief handshake, she felt a spark of electricity run all the way up her arm. Aggravated with herself for being affected by him, she said brusquely, "I believe you know why I'm here."
"Yeah, but you know, I already told your boss Forman that I'm not leaving. I've got too much work to do and besides, I refuse to be a pawn of the government."
"Dr. Hyde, I really don't care to argue with you about this. Your work is now a matter of national security and I must place you under my protection."
"I don't think so, Lady." When she started to protest, he tskked at her and said, "You might as well just trot your pretty little fanny on out of here because I'm not going anywhere. And by the way, tell Forman that the "honey trap" doesn't work with me 'cause I refuse to fall victim to the female race."
Jackie felt her Amazonian Princess heritage take over. "Don't patronize me, you arrogant man!" She said the last word with all of the contempt she could muster.
Hyde ignored her rant and ambled back inside his small cluttered office. "Listen, Dollface, it's nothing personal. I'm sorry you came all this way for nothing." He turned to face her and thought for a second. "But you know, if you want to stick around for awhile, I'm not opposed to doing it," he said with a smirk and a raised eyebrow.
Jackie walked right up to within inches of him, put her hands on her hips and gave him her fiercest look, although it was diminished somewhat by the fact that she had to tilt her head to look up at him. "Dr. Hyde, I'd appreciate it if you kept your disgusting thoughts to yourself. And you are going with me, whether you like it or not!"
He grinned down at her and said, "Mmm, you're saucy! Are you gonna handcuff me?"
Before Jackie could formulate her next indignant response, a sudden loud noise echoed down the hallway. Four men dressed in black trench coats rushed into the lab and office area. They were carrying submachine guns, which they immediately leveled at Jackie and Hyde. The apparent leader of the group stepped forward. "Professor Hyde, I presume?" he said with a guttural Russian accent.
"Yeah, man. What do you want?" Hyde said, his smoke-induced fog rapidly slipping away. He stepped protectively in front of Jackie to shield her from the gun-toting thugs facing them.
"You will come with us, Professor. We have need of information from you."
"I don't think so, pal. Now you and your buddies need to get out of my lab."
"My dear Professor, you mistake me. I am not asking, I am telling. Boris, convince the gentleman."
With that, one of the larger thugs stepped threateningly toward Hyde. When he grabbed at his arm, Hyde reared back and let fly with a good, solid roundhouse punch. The brute wobbled for a moment and then fell to the ground crying out, "Ow, my eye!"
The sound of automatic weapons being locked filled the room. Hyde found himself facing the business end of three very nasty-looking Uzi submachine guns. Oh, shit, he thought. Suddenly he felt two small hands pressing against his back. "Move it, Curly Locks," Jackie said while pushing him none too gently out of the way.
The Russian thugs lowered their weapons and began to chuckle at the sight of the very angry and very small woman facing them. Suddenly Jackie began to spin rapidly. An explosion of light obscured her briefly and when she appeared again, she was dressed in a red, white, and blue outfit that showed off her delicately feminine curves to great advantage. Her black hair fell in lush curls about her slender shoulders but was held back from her face with a gold tiara. Her blue and white short-shorts were cut very high on her legs and her red and gold top was strapless and very low-cut. High-heeled boots completed the sexy ensemble.
Dr. Hyde broke the stunned silence of the group of men. "Far out, man!"
The Russians raised their weapons and began to fire at the Amazonian princess. She deftly blocked their bullets with her wristbands, which were made of solid feminum. The thugs, realizing they were overmatched, beat a rapid retreat out of the building.
Princess Jackie turned to face the stunned and admiring professor. "So, Dr. Hyde, would you like to reconsider coming with me?"
"Whoa, that was really cool, baby", he said while sneaking a peek down her top. This girl was hot and tough!
"Doctor, we have no time for this. I suggest we leave now before they decide to return and try again."
"Listen, sweetheart, like I told you before, I'm not going anywhere," Hyde said stubbornly and turned to head back toward his office. He heard a whistling noise and stopped suddenly as he felt a golden lasso settle around him. When it was pulled tight, his arms were effectively trapped against his waist. "What the hell!" he exclaimed.
Princess Jackie slowly tugged on the golden rope and pulled him effortlessly toward her. "Professor, you misunderstand me. I'm not asking, I'm telling," she said with a smirk of her own.
"Damn, woman, you sure are bossy!" Hyde said ruefully.
"You have no idea," Princess Jackie said smugly.
End of Part I. This chapter started getting so long that I decided to break it up into two parts. Hope you enjoyed it so far.