Introducing: Heaven, Hell, and Houseguests. Written together by DragonSeer and Griz. Features all the SR1 vampires in their pretty forms (i.e.- as the nice-to-look-at lieutenants and Kain as a bit older version of BO2).

Ky and Tansy belong to DS and Griz, respectively. No touchy. Vamps belong to Eidos. Damn them! *DS shakes fist at sky impotently*

Griz adds that flaming will result in more suffering and pain than the seventh pit of Hell would cause you.

Babies screamed for attention, children whined for toys, teenagers asked for money. Sounds swelled around in an endless stream and people walked in their own worlds, concentrating on what they wanted and what they needed. Such was always the atmosphere of the mall, and such would it always be. People always knew what they needed, but wanted what they didn't. Such was always the case, and the two girls were no different.

"Come on," one pleaded, trying to head back to a Cutlery 'n More store, "I want to look at the new swords they have in." She was about five four, had short black hair to her chin with the bangs obviously dyed a vibrant purple, and stared longingly at the store with hazel, bordering on blue, eyes. She wore a silk sarong and matching halter-top, both in black silk with gold and red trimmings. The other girl of the pair tugged on her arm, keeping her away from her goal.

The other also had chin-length hair, but it was dyed a vibrant neon pink, and was dressed in pinstriped pants with rhinestones around the belt and down the seam on the outside. To compliment it, she was wearing a plain white button-down shirt and stood three inches shorter than the other girl, but her coffee-colored eyes were narrowed in effort.

"Come on, Ky," the brown-eyed girl growled. "You have enough swords. You don't need to buy more! Besides, I'm hungry and I want to go eat."

"But, but," Ky, short for Kyviana whimpered, looking at her prize slowly fading away. She sighed deeply and crossed her arms in a pout.

"You're so mean, Tansy."

"I know."

Tansy resumed tugging at Ky's arm and eventually managed to drag her to the food court. Upon arrival, she released her sister's arm and stared thoughtfully at every single sign every establishment in the food court had.

'So many choices, so little time . . .' Tansy thought, trying her best not to drool. She looked from one corner of the food court to the next before turning to Ky.

"Okay, Ky . . . do we go to Subway or the Creole place in the corner? Or what about the Chinese place over there, or the juice bar there, or—"

"JUST PICK ONE!!!" the hazel-eyed girl, who was not nearly as fussy about where they ate, yelled. Tansy waved a calm hand at her, expecting such a response from her more instinctual-driven sister. At the apparent dismissal, Ky stomped off to go get Chinese food. Tansy stared after her sister before heading over to the Creole place that had a sign over it that read "Bourbon Street" to order herself lunch. The line was a bit longer than she had expected, and when she got up to the register, she listed off what she wanted, then stared at the young man and asked, "Isn't Bourbon Street where all the hookers in New Orleans are at?"

The young man blinked at her in confusion and hastily got her order without answering her. She paid for it and left, chuckling and found Ky sitting at a table. Ky had heard her sister tormenting the poor man, but had concentrated on finding a table for them both and found something interesting to look at. Tansy had seen the rapt expression on her sister's face and sat down next to her.

"Hey, what's up?"

"Major eye-candy," Ky answered, nodding to the other end of the food court. Both sisters looked over to see six young men laughing and chatting easily with one another, dressed in black leather.

"Ky, stop checking out the male populous and eat."

"Oh," she sighed, but started munching on her chow mein. Both fell silent as they leaned over and sampled each other's orders. They were intimately used to each other's presence. It was during summer when they were sent to visit their grandparents, which ended up being three months of them entertaining themselves. Unbeknownst to their parents, the girls' grandparents were on a cruise, leaving the girls in charge of the house. Kyviana and Tansy were both eighteen and almost identical twins.

There was a sudden rumble and both girls turned instinctively toward the center of the food court as lighting crackled and part of the floor ripped up, sending tables and chairs flying. A large form jutted out of the ground, and a hulking creature pulled itself up. It landed on two back feet and stood vaguely like a dinosaur-human. It was green skinned, and horns protruded off the back of its skull. Small bat-like wings shot out of its back and it hissed angrily. The six men shifted in their seats slightly, eyeing it worriedly. A taller man with white-silver hair walked next to them and shook his head, indicating them to wait and see. The green-skinned demon whipped its head around, searching for something.

"Where are the twins?" it growled, tail lashing. Humans began screaming and running, throwing themselves up against corners to get away from the monstrosity. Only two people remained sitting; the two girls.

"Demon," Tansy sighed.

"Your turn?" Kyviana asked hopefully.

"You wish. I did it last time. Besides, it's been a few weeks. We were due for another attempt."

"Yup. All right, then, lemme at him." The black-haired woman stood slowly and walked out to the demon, oblivious to the chaos surrounding her. It pointed a claw at her.

"You will come with me."

"I do not think so, no," she retorted, her silk sarong beginning to ripple in a breeze that had no obvious source. Power rose through her veins and cruel balefire whipped across her arms. She reached behind her back and her hand closed on something invisible before she pulled around a sword that manifested suddenly. The silver blade hummed in the air eagerly. Ky began chanting words of power as the demon roared in protest and charged her. She waited until it looked like the thing would hit her, then gracefully jumped up, bringing the blade around, screaming, "DEMON-EATING STRIKE!" She felt the blade slam into the tough hide of the demon, a moment of resistance, then split through it like it was paper. She landed softly on the other side, her hand opening and the sword vanished. She stood, looking at the mess, closed her eyes a moment, and swung around her arm. Green fire raced across the area in a blast, righting chairs, fixing the hole, and people's eyes glazed over. They sat back down where they had been before and shook off the power, then continued their conversations and lunch as if nothing had interrupted. Ky sighed deeply and sat down across from Tansy to finish eating.

"Show-off," Tansy muttered.

"What?" Ky answered innocently. "At least I like to have fun. It's not my fault I'm the more social one."

"You are not!"

"Oh yes I am! Why do you think I get invited to more parties than you?"

"Now you're the one being mean," Tansy sighed.

"All in a good cause," was the response.

Tansy finished her food and got up to throw the leftovers away. She couldn't help noticing that all seven men seated at the other end of the food court were gazing intently at her and Ky. Resisting the urge to flip the young men the bird, she calmly dumped her tray into the trash can and walked back to the table she and Ky had been sitting at. She looked back over at the young men, who were still staring, and sighed.

"Take a picture, it lasts longer," she muttered darkly, sending annoyed glances to the other end of the food court. Ky let her eyes wander from the young men, to her sister, to her chow mien. She noticed the way they seemed to be staring at her twin and burst into laughter.

"Tansy, dear, if you didn't look like a 'Chicago' reject with pink hair, they wouldn't be staring at you!"

"Oh be quiet. They're staring at you, too, ya know!"

Ky was effectively silenced for the next few minutes. She finished her food and threw the leftovers away in silence, returned to her seat, and gestured to Tansy.

"Let's go," she muttered

"Why?"

"Because we've been here for hours!" With that, Ky grabbed Tansy's arm and dragged her out of the mall.

There was a long silence at the table as the strange girls left.

"All right, I'll be the first to ask," one of the younger men commented. "What the hell just happened?!"

The silver-white haired man pulled over a chair and sat down next to his unruly mob of children.

"It would seem," he stated, "that this world holds a secret."

"But all the signs indicated this world to be solely populated by humans only," a slightly older brother protested.

"I am aware of that, Rahab," the silver maned man snapped. "They most certainly aren't supposed to be here."

"So none of us have any idea what they are?" one of the older males inquired.

"So nice to know I'm not the only one unaware of what's going on," the first who had spoken mumbled to himself.

"Shut-up, Zephon!"

"Bite me, Dumah."

Dumah leaned forward and hissed, exposing fangs. "Only too happy to oblige."

"Dumah. Zephon." The white-haired man's voice was soft, but held a note of growing impatience with their antics. Both subsided, mumbling, "Yes, Lord Kain."

"So, my Lord, what shall we do with this information?" the second eldest inquired. Kain steepled his talons and thought.

"Zephon, Turel, get out there. Follow them if you can, and try to find out as much as you are able."

Both brothers, Turel being the second oldest and Zephon the second youngest, glared at each other, but nodded.

"Yes, my Lord."

Both brothers stood and quickly darted off after the girls.

"Raziel," Kain stated. The eldest of the brothers turned to look at his creator.

"Yes, my Lord?"

"Follow them. Keep at a distance and out of sight, but make sure those fools keep their mind on the job and not fighting one another. I also trust you to find things they miss."

"Yes, my Lord." Raziel stood in a graceful, cat-like movement and left to follow his younger brothers. Kain turned to the third youngest and the youngest.

"Rahab, Melchiah, go find us some form of accommodations on this god-forsaken rock."

The two vampires nodded and left quietly, and Kain turned to the more physically oriented third eldest.

"Dumah, you will be coming with me."

"Where will we be going, my Lord?"

Kain smirked malevolently. "To find dinner."