Disclaimer: Fushigi Yuugi  and associated characters belong to Watase Yuu and others.

Beta-read by the wonderful KittyLynne, who is this fic's guardian angel.

A Touch of Blue A tale of the Seiryuu Seishi

Prologue: Dragon Awakening

******

Can the love of a lifetime fade away?

Love is something that is expressed, accepted, cherished and kept close to the heart. It becomes a light, guiding one through the dark trials in life, giving courage and strength to overcome the blackest of nights. It would seem that to love can only mean one's salvation. And yet, there is another kind of love, where feelings are hidden and suppressed, locked fast in the soul, though it is not any lesser in strength. Even when it is hidden, it seems that love can never be ignored and can never die, because it is stubbornly kept alive by memory…

Perhaps in the end, Nakago realized that.

Then again, possibly not.

He denied himself happiness and satisfaction, denied himself all the numerous chances for salvation that were flung at him- all for the sake of bitter ambition and revenge. A man who could have been so much, the brightest star in Seiryuu's constellation, had been reduced to playing the clichéd villain with a thirst for vengeance. Revenge seems futile in death, does it not Nakago? You can't answer me now, of course, but then again, I'm not the person to whom you should answer.

That person is now in another world , where you are now headed too. Reborn into another life. Given a second chance. Knowing you, maybe this chance will be squandered as well. Still, I hope, as I've always done, that this time round it won't be in vain. Second chances are hard to come by, Nakago. I was never given one. And you don't deserve one. I wonder what Seiryuu and the gods were thinking when you were reincarnated in the real world? It's none of my concern, of course. What do I know about the ways of gods?

I forget he cannot hear me. It is just as well.

Be that as it may, all of it is in the past. My narrative is set in the future and it concerns someone else, not the former Shogun of Kutou, nor the former Seiryuu no seishi. It concerns someone quite ordinary. Someone who once, in another life, let go of hope, let go of love.

I call it a tale because it began in the pages of a book and has now found its way into reality.

It's a tale of love once lost in the bitterness of war, but destined to come alive with… a touch of blue.

***

Before I begin my curious story, perhaps you should know a little about me, your humble storyteller. I'm afraid there is not much to say… indeed what can be said of a being that can be only seen in man's belief and imagination? A being that cannot be called living, nor dismissed as 'dead.' The term 'exists' is the perfect word that should be applied to me, with its subtle difference in meaning from 'life'.

Ah. But I confuse you. You are probably now thinking,  "what in the name of Seiryuu is all this twaddle? Is it even remotely connected with the Universe of the Four Gods?" And then the scary but inevitable conclusion dawns on you: "This narrator is a ghost!"

You are partly right.

I am a kami, a spirit that floats anywhere and everywhere in the world of mortals, can cross over worlds, and even enter a mortal's thoughts and fantasies. Enter, but alas, not influence or remain. I touch and yet cannot hold onto this wonderful living world, pulsing with feelings of passion, desire, hope, betrayal, sadness and tragedy. Life, human life, is wonderful with the gift of feeling and I mourn my loss every single moment.

Who am I, you ask again? You may remember me as I once was, but who I am is not important. The tale I tell is far more important than the spinner of that tale.

***

Picture me now as a breath of wind, rustling the emerald leaves of a plant just outside the abode of the All-Knowing Mother of Gods. Through the large window, I see Taiits-kun sits alone. Her wise, ancient head drops low, her bearing is tensed and an occasional shudder racks her frame. A year has passed since the summoning of Suzaku and not much has changed. The vast white hall is still as opulently decorated as before, with rich curtains, tapestries and paintings of mystical scenes. Gold glitters off everywhere, on the ceilings, walls… all that is not white is tinged with gold, and Taiits-kun's throne gleams the brightest of all. 

But wait- there are no Nyan-Nyans! Not a single whisper, save that of the summer breeze, echoes through the immense, silent chamber. It is empty. People say that humble, broken-down places are the bleakest, but the truth maybe quite the opposite. A banquet, when laid for a hundred and attended by five, is a much more sorry affair than one simple meal shared by five. Similarly, without the gay chatter and mischievous, busy ways of the Nyan-Nyans, Taiits-kun's palatial abode is desolate and the emptiness is emphasized, rather than checked, by her very self.

 I steal closer on airy feet, and then pause behind a marble column gilded with gold. Closeness reveals clearly what the distance had hid: Taiits-kun is worried. She does not sense my approach as she normally would have done, and instead is watching the large mirror that floats by her side. No clear image is reflected there as of yet. Then, as we watch, a wreath of blue mist slowly appears in the glassy depths, accompanied by the heady aroma of burning incense and the sound of crashing waves.

Seiryuu-seikun. 

To be very honest, at this moment I feel inclined to slip away, tale or no tale. The awesome presence of Seiryuu pervades the hall, and if I were flesh and blood, sharp tingles would have rushed down my spine, along with a chill, for the God of War had always terrified me since when I had breathed. The passing of time has not quelled that fear. I am still afraid. But I am here for a reason- the story begins from this point, and so I muster up the courage to stay.

Taiits-kun gazes steadily into the mirror where a hazy image of Seiryuu is visible. She does not openly talk, but communicates with him in spirit, and I listen to the exchange of thoughts. Eavesdropping, yes. But you will excuse me when you realize how significant this event is. So without shame, I sneak in on the gods' conversation.

"It must be done." Seiryuu's thoughts are like the cascade of cold water; a roaring waterfall racing down mountains. I shiver unseen.

"What you say has never been done before. A miko entering this world again to summon a god for a second time? It is madness. I cannot allow it."

"Kutou is in ruins. Do you prefer the destruction of my country?"

"No!! I certainly don't prefer that. But there must be some other option. Your miko is not strong. To succeed in eliminating this evil, a strong presence is needed."

"I believe in her. That is enough. She will defeat the enemy."

"Then there is the matter of seishi. Three of them have already passed over to the other world and the rest of them are scattered in Kutou or wherever. Being reincarnated, they will have no memory of their past. They can be of no assistance to their miko."

"At the right moment their memories will awaken."

"Are you sure Seiryuu no Miko will agree to this? After what happened to her the previous summoning?"

"She cannot escape her karma. It is fated and it will be so. You surely know that."

"Still…"

"I have reason to trust she will not refuse a second chance."

"Second chances come at a very great price. However, the instability of Kutou threatens the fragile balance of this world. The enemy must be defeated. Very well, it will be done."

"Shall she arrive now?"

"No. It's too dangerous. Let the seishi first prepare her way. And then… may the miko be victorious."

The mist clears away with the vision of Seiryuu, and the mirror floats off to an unobtrusive corner. Taiits-kun looks more aged than ever as she leans back on her throne, muttering to herself.

"To pry open old memories is a painful, thankless task. Especially in your case, Seiryuu. I hope you know what you have undertaken."

I agree with you, O Wise One. Seldom are remembrances of a previous life anything other than agony. But so many questions were left unanswered then, left hanging till it became too late. When the past lies incomplete, can it not be reconciled in the present?

That is another question to be left unanswered.

For the time being.

***

From the world of fiction, we now come to reality.

In Tokyo…

Are you surprised? Do you wonder how came I to the real world? Remember I am a spirit. Barriers erected between different realms cannot hold back one such as I. Now, to continue…

With a gasp and a start, Hongou Yui, Seiryuu no miko, wakes from a dreamless slumber. She does not know what disturbed her; premonition, feeling of impending crisis, or maybe-

A distant voice echoes dimly through her thoughts.

"Yui-sama!"

Yui brushes the feeling away. She has had her fill of nightmares the last year, and has no intention of reliving that experience. She is just Hongou Yui, high school student. A normal, ordinary final-year student with worries about school, exams, college and- and… and nothing else. Nothing.

Liar, she thinks.

Sweat drips down her forehead. Pulling on a robe, Yui goes to the window and leans quietly on the sill, looking up at the sky. There is no moon tonight, though multitudes of stars shine in fiery brightness. The silvery light falls on her pale, upturned face, illuminating the dusky blue eyes that now glisten with drops of moisture. A solitary leaf twirls down with a wandering breeze, its dance of death in descent.

If she could just close her eyes and shut her ears to the raucous noises of traffic coming from the nearby highway, she could almost, almost really believe herself back in the palace, where the moon shone down on the empty courtyard, causing every blade of grass and speck of stone to stand out in the milky radiance, where Soi would walk in the shadows, always silent, a breathing shadow, where Nakago would detail plans in his flat, formal tone, plans to ensure the victory of Seiryuu, plans which would crumble in the dust with him and his miko. And where he…   

Well, she is not there. They are not there either.

She gazes at the sky again, eyes unwittingly trying to pick out the constellations and failing. Does the same moon rise there? Is the sky same? Then… where are the stars?

Stupid question. They're dead. He's dead. The End.

The leaf disappears from her view and the night air turns bitterly cold. Yui closes the window and goes back to bed, tucking the sheets tight around her as if to ward off cold and the spirits of memory that persist in haunting her. On an empty, scrupulously clean, tidy bedside table, a silver framed photograph of  herself and Tetsuya is placed. They are smiling, an expression that seems incongruous in the darkened room, where ghosts still linger.

She stares at the patterns drawn on the floor by the play of starlight and shadow, and in a moment falls asleep. Deaf to voices from the past.

"Seiryuu no Miko…"

"Yui-sama, believe me! I love you, Yui-sama!"

She blocks out the voices, because if she listened, it would begin all over again; the pain and regret and guilt, all making her life a living hell. "Failure is the stepping-stone to success," some old fool said. No. Failure leads the path to hell. She knows that. And yet, she has everything now, everything she had tried so hard to attain there - love, friendship, respect- everything important to her. She is strong now. And nothing else matters. Nothing else remains.

Nothing?

A wooden bureau stands in a farther corner, hidden in the darkness. It is full of old clothes, toys, a couple of photo albums, some favorite childhood books, and other common things from her youth. Stashed at its very back, behind a small bundle of washed out socks, is a sorry-looking, discolored cardboard box, frayed and torn around the edges.

Inside it, there is a blue school-tie carrying traces of blood.

Yui never opens that box.

Can the love of a lifetime fade away if it is ignored?

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Coming next— Chapter I : Wish, come true