The girl with long dark hair was sitting at the bar, hunched in the most unattractive way, over a drink.
"So..." she continued, trying to stifle her own laugher, her voice slurred. "A Goblin King walks into a bar, right...? Stop me if you've..."
"Sarah, for Chrissake, I've heard it a zillion times." said the blonde girl sitting next to her. "Stop going on about this damn Elf King or whatever, and frickin' sober up! I'm going." she said, pushing her hair from her eyes. "I'm meeting Dave."
"Fiiiiine!" cried Sarah. "Just leave! S'not like Sarah's important... Oh no. She only went and solved a Labyrinth and saved the whole wooooooorld!!"
"Yeah..... Whatever, Dreamer. I'm off." said the girl, and picked up her bag, wrapping her coat around her. The bar door had banged shut even before Sarah had turned to say bye.
"Uh...." grunted Sarah, holding her glass underneath the bartenders nose.
"More?" he asked, his brow furrowing.
"Georgy-worgy. Pleeeease can I have another?" she slurred. George the bartender sighed and poured the girl another shot of whisky. She payed his wages, after all...
"Y'know what, Georgy?" she asked, wistfully.
"What." he asked, his voice considerably lacking in enthusism. Not again....
"I'm a hero, y'know."
"Really?"
"Yup!" she grinned manically. "Defeated this evil King and everything. I kick ass!"
"Okay. That's your last one, Sarah...."
"But I did!"
"I know, and you tell me every night." he groaned, taking away her now emptied glass.
Then, as he was about to turn away, he saw the strangest thing.
Stumbling into the bar, were three people. One amazingly ugly... er... short man, and one bloke who seemed to be dressed in old clothes... like breeches and stuff. He had a mask on his face, and had black hair, tied back. Inbetween the two, with an arm around either one, was another guy, dressed sort of like the other one, except he was thinner and taller, and was wearing some make-up that hadn't been reapplied in at least a day. But the thing that got George the most, was the hair.
Tina Turner? Worse.
Blonde and layered, with some streaky blue bits. Looked like somone had been at it with a hedge trimmer. And then dragged him through the hedge. Actually, if he wasn't mistaken... that was a twig over by his left ear.
The trio came closer, drunkenly singing some song about... what was it, underworld, or something?
Sarah spun around, falling flat on her face as the bar stool toppled over. She lifted her head, her eyes meeting a pair of boots, then some tighted legs and then a.... well....
"Arghhhhhhhh!!!!"
"Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!" relplied the trio of misfits.
Sarah frowned and picked herself up. The little short man went to help her. She grabbed hold of him, and threw her arms around him.
"Higglehead!!!" she exclaimed, with glee.
"Mrfffpretsssrmmm...." relplied Hoggle.
"What?" she asked, still hugging him.
"I don't think he can breath." said George, one eyebrow raised.
"Oh." she said confusedly, letting him go, not realising she had lifted him up to her height until he fell with a loud thud onto the floor. Sarah sat down again, and Jareth went to sit on the stool next to her. He rested his elbow on the bar. Well, he would have, if he hadn't missed the bar.
He tried in vain to regain his dignity, and this time managed to get his elbow onto the bar, glaring at Sarah through ruffled blonde strands.
"I don't like you." he slurred.
"Well gooooood!" shouted Sarah, about a centimetre from his face. "And you got silly hair!" she retorted, feeling damn pleased with herself.
"You can't say that to me, caterpillar-girl, I'm King of the Gooooooblins!"
Sarah lunged, but they both fell onto the floor. She looked up from their tangled mess to see Hoggle and the other further along the bar, doing tequila slammers.
"Noooo!!! You're meant to put the salt on the back of your hand, dumbass, not the tequila!"
Hoggle grunted.
"Sorryyy... Urgh, this lemon is horrible."
"That's 'cause it's a beermat, Hedgewiggle."
"Aw, shurrup." bellowed Sarah. "Georgy..." she began, turning around.
"Oh no, kid - you go home now. And you lot, out!"
"But that's not..."
Jareth clamped a gloved hand on Sarah's mouth.
"Don't you dare." he warned, with a dignified hiccup.
Sarah did the best kind of pout she could underneath his hand, and then got up.
"Right! Parteeeee at my house!!" she shouted, after wrenching Jareth's hand from her mouth.
** Three Hours Later **
"I wuv you really Jarethy-warethy...." said Sarah, snuggling up to his tights.
"Sawah, gimme a big snog, lovebunny!" said Jareth, lunging at her and grabbing her, before giving her a Great Big Snog with Oodles of Tommy Tongue (Authoress: Anyone like Red Dwarf? *giggle*).
** Four hours later **
"Sorry about that." said Jareth, reaching for his tights from the top of the wardrobe, whilst trying his best to hide his package with a leather glove.
"It's okay... is wasn't your fault." relplied Sarah, sitting up in the bed, her head feeling like it had split into about a million pieces.
"Too much of that pinky stuff, ya know?"
"Aftershock?"
"Yeah, that was it."
"Well, I know that thing... er, happens to blokes when they drink too much..."
Jareth turned and forgot about his glove.
"But I'm a Goblin King!!" he ranted. "It doesn't happen to me!"
Whilst Jareth hadn't noticed he had forgotten the glove, Sarah *had*. Her eyes widened. Funny the things you didn't remember... Her headache was forgotten rapidly....
"Mmmmm?" she asked dazedly, dragging her gaze up to his face.
Jareth blushed.
"J...." said Sarah slowly. "Wanna have another go....?"
-----------------------
Fin.
"So..." she continued, trying to stifle her own laugher, her voice slurred. "A Goblin King walks into a bar, right...? Stop me if you've..."
"Sarah, for Chrissake, I've heard it a zillion times." said the blonde girl sitting next to her. "Stop going on about this damn Elf King or whatever, and frickin' sober up! I'm going." she said, pushing her hair from her eyes. "I'm meeting Dave."
"Fiiiiine!" cried Sarah. "Just leave! S'not like Sarah's important... Oh no. She only went and solved a Labyrinth and saved the whole wooooooorld!!"
"Yeah..... Whatever, Dreamer. I'm off." said the girl, and picked up her bag, wrapping her coat around her. The bar door had banged shut even before Sarah had turned to say bye.
"Uh...." grunted Sarah, holding her glass underneath the bartenders nose.
"More?" he asked, his brow furrowing.
"Georgy-worgy. Pleeeease can I have another?" she slurred. George the bartender sighed and poured the girl another shot of whisky. She payed his wages, after all...
"Y'know what, Georgy?" she asked, wistfully.
"What." he asked, his voice considerably lacking in enthusism. Not again....
"I'm a hero, y'know."
"Really?"
"Yup!" she grinned manically. "Defeated this evil King and everything. I kick ass!"
"Okay. That's your last one, Sarah...."
"But I did!"
"I know, and you tell me every night." he groaned, taking away her now emptied glass.
Then, as he was about to turn away, he saw the strangest thing.
Stumbling into the bar, were three people. One amazingly ugly... er... short man, and one bloke who seemed to be dressed in old clothes... like breeches and stuff. He had a mask on his face, and had black hair, tied back. Inbetween the two, with an arm around either one, was another guy, dressed sort of like the other one, except he was thinner and taller, and was wearing some make-up that hadn't been reapplied in at least a day. But the thing that got George the most, was the hair.
Tina Turner? Worse.
Blonde and layered, with some streaky blue bits. Looked like somone had been at it with a hedge trimmer. And then dragged him through the hedge. Actually, if he wasn't mistaken... that was a twig over by his left ear.
The trio came closer, drunkenly singing some song about... what was it, underworld, or something?
Sarah spun around, falling flat on her face as the bar stool toppled over. She lifted her head, her eyes meeting a pair of boots, then some tighted legs and then a.... well....
"Arghhhhhhhh!!!!"
"Arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!" relplied the trio of misfits.
Sarah frowned and picked herself up. The little short man went to help her. She grabbed hold of him, and threw her arms around him.
"Higglehead!!!" she exclaimed, with glee.
"Mrfffpretsssrmmm...." relplied Hoggle.
"What?" she asked, still hugging him.
"I don't think he can breath." said George, one eyebrow raised.
"Oh." she said confusedly, letting him go, not realising she had lifted him up to her height until he fell with a loud thud onto the floor. Sarah sat down again, and Jareth went to sit on the stool next to her. He rested his elbow on the bar. Well, he would have, if he hadn't missed the bar.
He tried in vain to regain his dignity, and this time managed to get his elbow onto the bar, glaring at Sarah through ruffled blonde strands.
"I don't like you." he slurred.
"Well gooooood!" shouted Sarah, about a centimetre from his face. "And you got silly hair!" she retorted, feeling damn pleased with herself.
"You can't say that to me, caterpillar-girl, I'm King of the Gooooooblins!"
Sarah lunged, but they both fell onto the floor. She looked up from their tangled mess to see Hoggle and the other further along the bar, doing tequila slammers.
"Noooo!!! You're meant to put the salt on the back of your hand, dumbass, not the tequila!"
Hoggle grunted.
"Sorryyy... Urgh, this lemon is horrible."
"That's 'cause it's a beermat, Hedgewiggle."
"Aw, shurrup." bellowed Sarah. "Georgy..." she began, turning around.
"Oh no, kid - you go home now. And you lot, out!"
"But that's not..."
Jareth clamped a gloved hand on Sarah's mouth.
"Don't you dare." he warned, with a dignified hiccup.
Sarah did the best kind of pout she could underneath his hand, and then got up.
"Right! Parteeeee at my house!!" she shouted, after wrenching Jareth's hand from her mouth.
** Three Hours Later **
"I wuv you really Jarethy-warethy...." said Sarah, snuggling up to his tights.
"Sawah, gimme a big snog, lovebunny!" said Jareth, lunging at her and grabbing her, before giving her a Great Big Snog with Oodles of Tommy Tongue (Authoress: Anyone like Red Dwarf? *giggle*).
** Four hours later **
"Sorry about that." said Jareth, reaching for his tights from the top of the wardrobe, whilst trying his best to hide his package with a leather glove.
"It's okay... is wasn't your fault." relplied Sarah, sitting up in the bed, her head feeling like it had split into about a million pieces.
"Too much of that pinky stuff, ya know?"
"Aftershock?"
"Yeah, that was it."
"Well, I know that thing... er, happens to blokes when they drink too much..."
Jareth turned and forgot about his glove.
"But I'm a Goblin King!!" he ranted. "It doesn't happen to me!"
Whilst Jareth hadn't noticed he had forgotten the glove, Sarah *had*. Her eyes widened. Funny the things you didn't remember... Her headache was forgotten rapidly....
"Mmmmm?" she asked dazedly, dragging her gaze up to his face.
Jareth blushed.
"J...." said Sarah slowly. "Wanna have another go....?"
-----------------------
Fin.