Disclaimer: I don't own X-Men characters, Marvel does. Sidney andSophie are from me though.
Author's Notes: This chapter contains a song. I included it because it reflects perfectly the feelings, which occur in this scene. I'll be using songs as well for some chapters in the future. For this one I used an Evanescence song called "Away from Me".
Enjoy!
I hold my breath as this life starts to take its toll
I hide behind a smile as this perfect plan unfolds
Sidney hurried along the corridor, impatient to reach her room. She bumped into Jean along the way who asked her if she was alright.
Of course, I'm not! Sidney thought. Her eyes were red and puffy and her cheeks, tear-strewn, but she managed to smile at her teammate and reply that everything was ok.
She entered her room and locked the door. It was dark and cold, but she didn't care. Her night with Remy had been terrible and she felt miserable. Once she'd found out who he really was, the whole thing had been a disaster. She still couldn't believe she had revealed everything to him. She had told him about her past and the guy obviously didn't care about her problems. He preferred getting her into his bed.
How comforting! Sidney thought as she fell on her bed.
Suddenly she got up and reached for a lamp sitting on the bedside table. She lit it and then opened the table's only drawer.
Inside, there was only one content; a crippled photograph. It was a picture of herself with Sophie, which dated back a long time ago. They were holding each others waist outside in the garden and smiling. Slowly, Sidney unfolded the photograph, revealing another person on the picture. It was her brother; his arm was around Sidney's shoulders and he was smiling at her.
But oh, God, I feel I've been lied to
Lost all faith in the things I have achieved
And I
She narrowed her eyes at him. How could he have changed so much? How could he do her so much harm?
To his own sister.
She crumbled the photo in her hand and threw it in the drawer. She fell back on the bed covers and thought about the past events. About that Christmas night and all that happened since; her arrival to the States, Sophie's incident and her arrival in the mansion.
Why had she let herself go through all this? Why hadn't she broken down before?
Sidney needed to forget about her problems, forget about her night with Gambit. She got up and thought quickly.
She needed a drink and she needed it bad.
She remembered Scott telling her there was no alcohol in the mansion except for the odd beer. Her face cringed at the thought of beer; she hated the stuff.
She also remembered Rogue telling her Logan had his own private stock of booze in his room, which everyone knew about except Cyclops. She changed into jeans and top and slipped quietly into the corridor.
Time to pay a visit to the Wolverine. Surely he's gone out, its Saturday night!
I've woken now to find myself
In the shadows of all I've created
I'm longing to be lost in you
(away from this place I have made)
Won't you take me away from me
Having reached his door, she knocked three times without an answer. She sneaked in cautiously. The door was surprisingly unlocked. It was very dark inside and smelt strongly of Logan's cigars but also of his own personal odour. It was more attractive than she had thought.
Looking around, she couldn't see anything in the pitch black. She fiddled around the wall, slowly, searching for a light switch, when suddenly, a hand clasped her mouth from behind and her arm was yanked from the wall and held prisoner behind her back.
"Whatcha doing here, kid?" A menacing, deep voice spoke next to her ear.
It was Logan.
He switched on the lights and Sidney noticed his claws were extended.
"Holy shit!" exclaimed Sidney, pushing Wolverine away from her and rubbing her sore arm. "Do you always greet people like this?"
Wolverine just shrugged. This wasn't going as she had planned.
"Rogue told me you hid bottles in your room, so I came to check it out."
Wolverine gave her one look. "Get out!"
He opened the door and waited for her to move but Sidney resisted. "Oh Logan come on! I'm sorry for sneaking in and all but please! You're the only person who has alcohol! I'll go shopping tomorrow and refill your stock if you want. Seriously I won't raid your booze, I just need a drink tonight before going to bed. I've had a really bad time and - "
"Get outta here. Ya ain't legal kid!" Her whining was already getting on his nerves.
"I'm not a kid anymore Logan!" She started back. "You know very well I'm legal in my country so just give me a fucking drink, will you?"
"Forget it! Ya think I wanna drunken girl on my arms to take care of all night?"
"Oh come on! I know I can take alcohol. I won't get drunk on one bottle, trust me. Just help me out - ok? I really need to forget tonight – please!"
Wolverine looked at her smirking. "You can hold alcohol, huh?" He opened a nearby closet and took a tequila bottle out. "Wanna bet?"
Sidney answered with her cutest smile.
Crawling through this world as disease flows through my veins
I look into myself, but my own heart has been changed
I can't go on like this
I loathe all I've become
Sidney finished off the last drops of whiskey, laughing at Logan's story. Her plan had worked, she had got her booze but now she was drunk. She was having a good time with her teammate and hadn't thought about Remy during all evening.
She stopped to look at herself for a moment. She was getting drunk to forget her problems and a guy; of course, there was always a guy!
How sad can I get! She suddenly thought. But she didn't care; she was drunk and having a good night. She was going to do whatever she wanted to do and whatever happened, she would think about the consequences tomorrow.
Logan too for once was having a pretty good night. This girl was fun to be with unlike Jeannie who couldn't stand a sip of wine. She was drunk on her wedding night after two glasses of red wine.
Sidney, on the other hand, had drank a whole bottle of tequila, downed the whiskey with Logan and now was planning to finish on vodka if she could still handle it. She remembered someone telling her that mixing different types of alcohol would get her completely trashed but that thought was far, far away.
Everyone else was sleeping in the mansion so they were left together on their own and Sidney was very drunk.
"I can't believe you said that to him. How come you never got kicked out?"
Wolverine, surprisingly, had told her about his past problems with Cyclops concerning Jean. "Cyke's a dick! I was always the one to leave when I wanted. He sure fumed 'bout Jeannie but he never did nuthin' 'bout it."
Sidney laughed once more and calming down she felt Logan looking intently at her.
Indeed, his dark hazel eyes were piercing through her own as she looked up to face him. A strange silence fell upon the kitchen as both mutants observed one another.
Finally Wolverine broke it. "How come I already seem to know ya?"
I've woken now to find myself
In the shadows of all I have created
I'm longing to be lost in you
(away from this place I have made)
Won't you take me away from me
A beautiful smile broke upon her face. She was so drunk, Sidney nearly told him the truth but she stopped in time. She was doing her best to hide her drunken state and thanked God she was sitting on the kitchen stool and had the counter for support. She could never have made it standing.
"Wait, wait! Let me sort this out! You don't remember me - whereas I know you - Mister Wolverine." She bent over, closer to him, as she whispered her last words.
Logan's eyes opened in surprise. The girl knew him? How?
"You know me? What d'ya mean? Ya know me from before?"
"Maybe."
She smiled at him again. Seeing her avoid his questions made Wolverine angry. He got up abruptly, pounding his fist on the counter.
"Answer me!"
Sidney didn't feel to well at that point and decided to get some fresh air. That's what she needed, fresh air. She thought he was being extremely rude to her, shouting like that. She hadn't done anything wrong.
Why did he have to shout like that, like her brother, like Gambit had?
She got up gripping the kitchen counter for balance and took a few steps towards the nearby wall. Her head was spinning and she felt suddenly very faint.
She walked a bit awkwardly but Wolverine didn't notice as he stepped towards her. He was too intrigued with what she was saying. He stood up and repeated himself, which he hated doing but he wouldn't let her get away.
"How d'y'know me?"
Suddenly Sidney turned around towards him. She narrowed her eyes and spoke loudly at him. "I know who you are Logan! I'll tell you exactly who you are! You're just like the rest of them, aren't you? Just like of all them from the Mafia."
She took a defiant step towards him, looking him straight in the eyes and pointed a finger at him.
"You're just a self-conceited, think-you-don't-need-anyone, uncontrollable raging son of a - "
SNIKT!
"Shut the fuck up!"
Before she had finished, Wolverine pushed her against the kitchen wall behind her. He kept a firm grip around her neck with one hand and threatened to slice her throat with the other.
Sidney's top had been torn in the process, indecently revealing part of her bra underneath.
Lost in a dying world I reach for something more
I have grown so weary of this lie I live
Both breathing heavily, Sidney looked at her top then at Logan and laughed.
"You see? The truth always hurts Logan and then you can't control yourself. But I haven't finished."
Logan was looking down her cleavage. All his anger had disappeared from his face and slowly he looked up at Sidney, gazing in her bright eyes.
In return, she grinned at him like a Cheshire cat.
"Last but not least," she whispered in his ear. "I'll admit - You're pretty darn fit!"
Next, before she knew it, they were kissing.
Wolverine pressed his lips down hard on hers and kept her trapped between his arms and the wall. He kissed her angrily and his body pressed hers harder against the wall.
He slowly let go of his grasp around her neck as his lips ran down it. She put both arms around his neck as they continued to kiss, holding on to him for support.
She was so dizzy she couldn't think anymore. Was this a dream or was she really kissing Logan? Her eyes couldn't focus anymore and she gave in to him. She liked his rough hands touching her body, his soft lips pressed against hers and his odour.
That odour, his natural fragrance! She wanted to inhale it one more time.
Logan's hands slipped down to her thighs. He gently lifted her against him and she wrapped her legs around his waist. They continued kissing as the Wolverine brought her up the stairs.
I've woken now to find myself
In the shadows of all I have created
I'm longing to be lost in you
I've woken now to find myself
I'm lost in the shadows of my own
I'm longing to be lost in you
Away from me
As Sidney woke up, she instantly wished she hadn't.
Her mouth was dry and she was extremely thirsty. She desperately needed water and especially painkillers for the headache, which had just hit her.
She kept her eyes shut for a while appreciating the bed: the softness of the pillow, the sheets, his arms, his chest. She laid her head there remembering how happy she felt being with Nick. He was so kind to her and was everything she had ever dreamed of – until he had abruptly dumped her the day he found out about her powers!
Sidney's eyes opened wide.
This isn't my room!
If she wasn't with Nick, then who -
"Hey darling!" was her answer.
Sidney sat up in a flash and faced Logan.
"Oh putain de merde!"
She covered herself the best she could with the sheets. "What the hell am I doing here?"
Logan's face fell into a frown. "Wait, ya mean ya don't remember?"
"Judging by the headache which is tearing my head apart, I guess I was drinking – a lot!"
Suddenly, she noticed most of her clothes scattered on the floor and picked them up quickly.
"Ya didn't seem that drunk!" Wolverine retorted.
"Yes, well trust me, I'm always THAT drunk! You just didn't notice." She exclaimed putting back her underwear on.
Wolverine laid down on his back. He was still tired; he closed his eyes and decided to deal with Sidney later.
She continued to get dressed, pausing momentarily, honestly trying to remember the previous night from the vague images and thoughts in her head. It was coming back to her slowly but surely. She was in the kitchen, obviously with Logan – he had shouted and ripped her top – and then -
"Oh you've gotta be kidding me!" She suddenly exclaimed turning to Logan. "We kissed!"
Keeping his eyes closed, Wolverine smirked. "Darlin', ya gotta remember the rest!"
Sidney turned away from Logan, feeling her cheeks glowing bright red.
"Ya know," Wolverine continued in a deep, soothing voice. "I could always help ya remember last night -"
He started cautiously pulling her towards him.
Sidney, on the other hand, pushed him away. She was more frustrated now than embarrassed.
"Shut up Logan! I really don't want to remember what happened and - "
She paused a second and cringed.
" – Great, well too late, I remember now. Its even worse than I thought! Jeez, I've broken two of the Institute's rules!" She stated plainly. "Logan, what are we gonna do?"
Wolverine sat up and put his arms around her waist. Though she felt the urge to push him away again, his words reassured her and she let him rest his head on her shoulder.
"Just stay with me for a while, its too early for this shit!"
Sidney was tempted, her head was aching but suddenly got up, breaking Logan's grip.
"Uh oh!" She thought at loud.
"What?"
"I just remembered that I've got training today with one of the X-Men at 9:00 am. What time is it?"
She nervously turned the alarm clock from the bedside table and realised she had twenty minutes left. At that point, panic overcame her.
"Oh my God! I've only got 20 mins left to get ready! I can't miss this training or Cyclops will kill me cos I have to get back in shape and all and if I miss it they'll suspect something or worse, kick me out of the team and then what will I do - "
"Woah calm down! Ya giving me a headache." Logan interrupted, lying back down on the bed. "B'sides, I was assigned to be yer instructor – yer personal instructor!"
He grinned at her but fed-up by his attitude, Sidney got up, pulled up her jeans and walked out of the room and straight back to hers. She was going to take a long, warm shower.
Damn the training! It's supposed to start any moment now!
Sidney cursed and she finished her last piece of toast. She had changed into her uniform for the training and now desperately wished Wolverine would forget about it or better oversleep and let her be.
She still had such a headache!
As she reached for the juice box in the fridge, she realised just how wrong she was about her instructor.
"Hey darlin', ya ready?"
Great! I knew he would come.
She slowly closed the door and turned to face Wolverine. "Don't call me darling!" She said angrily.
Seeing a flash of pain in his eyes, Sidney took a deep breath. "Look Logan - I'm really sorry about last night. It shouldn't have happened - It was just wrong. You were right, I shouldn't have started drinking like that, especially not because of - "
She broke off in time.
"Oh forget it!" She whispered and walked away but Wolverine caught her before she could turn away from him. He grasped her wrist.
"He don't luv ya eyes, he don't luv ya smile, he ain't hungry but for one thing kiddo!"
"What?"
"Gambit!" Logan spat out. "He don't care 'bout ya, yer just another trophy for his shelf - "
Why is he telling me all this? What's it up to him?
Sidney looked back at him surprised.
As though reading her mind, Logan suddenly knew he'd been too far. "I – I just wanted to warn ya; its 'bout time someone did!" He said more roughly.
Annoyed to hear the truth come out from Wolverine, Sidney tried to pull her arm free.
"You don't even know me!"
"Actually I do."
Hearing his words, Sidney froze. He continued to approach her, keeping a firm grasp on her wrist, his body closed up on hers.
"Ya somehow part of my past but I don't remember how. What I do know, is that ya ain't a threat to me, so ya no danger to the X-Men."
Sidney breathed out. Hell, for a sec there, I thought he knew who I was.
Wolverine looked sternly at her. She don't remember what she said to me last night. But she was freakin' out so much that I could smell it. Got links to the Mafia, huh? Dunno 'em personally but I'll be looking out fer ya darlin'.
Sidney realised Wolverine was still leaning on her and kept holding her tight. Feeling oppressed, she lit up balls of fire in her hands, which made even Wolverine back off.
"Now don't we have a training to start!"
Logan smirked back. "I think we had enough exercise to last for the day. Pity ya can't remember!"
Exasperated, Sidney walked out of the kitchen and once again back to her room.
Hey!So what did you think of this particular pairing? I bet no one expected it, but don't worry this is not Wolverine's love story!
Sorry about the long wait, I've been pretty busy with exams and Easter. Hopefully the next chapter will be here quickly, but I'm kinda stuck. I'm missing some scenes to link my ideas between them and its frustrating coz I'd like to make my fanfic the most true to the Marvel X-men universe.
Thanx for the previous reviews, hope u guys will have sumthin to say about this one. Enjoy and please review, I need the encouragement! Xxxx Ciao!