Okay, hi again, All!

I am going to be posting one of my reviews here and then addressing it. It was left by a guest reviewer, so there is no way to address it via PM, but I certainly feel it needs addressing because I agree wholeheartedly with a lot of the points this reviewer made.

Before I begin, I want everyone, especially this reviewer to know, I respect and appreciate all of the feedback I receive on my stories.

This is in no way meant to drag the reviewer, so I don't want anyone responding with anything rude please.

The contents of the review were:

Memory Bleeds

"You probably expect to hear this, but I personally think it's irresponsible and insulting to portray prostitution as something as safe, lucrative, and self-controlled as this. That's the case for maybe .05% of women in prostitution, yet it's a disproportionate amount of the narrative from people these days, usually fictional. It's basically propaganda that helps people ignore the plight of the other 99.5% being exploited, hurt, and straight-up trafficked. I get you just want to write a fun story, but it's something to consider."

Okay, so, first, I would like to start off by thanking this reviewer for their honesty. It takes a lot of courage to say something that could be construed as negative, especially to someone you don't know, so I definitely appreciate you for taking the time to raise these concerns with me.

Point one: "safe, lucrative, and self-controlled."

Let's talk first about safety:

I realize fully that there is not a lot of safety in the industry. I personally think there should be a lot more measures in place to protect sex-workers. The fact is, prostitution has been around since before the Bible was even written.

Different cultures have viewed and treated this differently throughout history, some more favourably than others, but always there has been some level of stigma associated with prostitution. I don't think there should be.

When you stigmatize vulnerable people, it prevents them from seeking the help that they need. If a prostitute gets raped or abused or force-fed drugs or any other awful thing, that person is less likely to report it than another person who does not work in that industry, and they are less likely to be taken seriously if they do.

This is wrong. And I feel it needs to change.

Lucrative:

Yes, a lot of prostitutes are badly taken advantage of by their pimps or agencies and most of them don't receive every dollar they earn or anywhere near that much.

But since the story is about a primarily free-lance prostitute who has no one sticking their hand into her pocket (and cannot even pay taxes on her income because it is illegal) I can tell you without a shadow of a doubt that she earns way more money than our family which my spouse supports on a single, minimum wage, retail income. So from my own standpoint (and no one else's) yes, I would view that as lucrative.

And I am certainly not saying that I think prostitutes are paid fairly. The social stigmas, the abuses, and the loss of dignity that a lot of them experience, all warrant that they should be paid a lot more. I also think a lot of other industries should be paid a lot more (such as teachers and child care workers) but that is neither here nor there.

Self-controlled:

I certainly agree that most prostitutes have very little control over what happens to them and the way they are treated. A lot even have no control over joining the industry in the first place and are forced into it by someone else.

Bella had control not because of the way her industry as a whole operates, but because of her own specific circumstances within that industry. Bella's adopted family had a lot of money. Like it or not (personally, I don't like it) money buys control. Likely, they would have put her in contact with the right people in the right circles to help her get started in a way that was safe, lucrative, and self-controlled for her.

I do not, by any means, attempt to insinuate, that this is the case for all prostitutes, the majority, or even very many at all.

In fact, Bella and Jasper both specifically say in the course of the story that her situation is the anomaly, not the norm.

Okay, next point: "it's a disproportionate amount of the narrative from people these days, usually fictional"

You might be right there.

Frankly, the only other experiences I have with this sort of narrative myself (characters portrayed as happy or successful prostitutes) are Inara from firefly, and Satine from Moulin Rouge, at least, those are the only ones I can think of. So, I personally can't speak to the prevalency of such narratives, but you are probably right.

My hope, as an author, and as a person, is to give a voice to people who don't have one.

Maybe you feel that only mistreated prostitutes deserve representation or maybe you feel there is more than enough examples of prostitutes being treated well.

Personally, I don't feel that way.

If prostitutes were treated well enough that we didn't need this snapshot of the way it could be…

Then I would not be hearing the word "whore" hurled in a derogatory fashion at every girl who decides to even glance at another girl's man.

In my opinion, if you represent prostitutes as people just like you and I, then it is possible that one day, people will stop treating them like garbage.

If all we show are the abuses, then people who have never been abused will find it hard to relate to those people and will think things like "wow, poor them, that sucks, but there is nothing I can do about it."

Whereas, if I show you Bella, as a daughter, a mother, a friend, a regular person, oh and by the way, she happens to be a prostitute…

Then maybe you will think "oh, hey, prostitutes are people, just like me. They don't deserve my wrath anymore than the drive thru girl does." And by the way, the drive thru girl doesn't deserve any wrath either.

Next point: "It's basically propaganda that helps people ignore the plight of the other 99.5%"

Okay, so if my intentions are not clear by this point, I will further clarify.

My goal is certainly not to ignore the badly treated prostitutes. I am of the opinion that all. prostitutes. are. treated. badly.

Perhaps Bella was not mistreated by her clients or a pimp or an agency.

But she herself said that she was slapped and kicked and spit on and called names etc. by the wives of her clients. She just wasn't choosing to dwell on her abuses which were, in her case, fairly minor and easy to ignore.

I understand that more serious abuses cannot be ignored by the person experiencing them and yet are all too often ignored by the people around them.

And trust me, I would love to write that narrative. But as someone who has never been badly abused, I honestly don't believe that I could do it justice.

It is one thing to write about a one-time incident, or a minor abuse. It is a whole other thing to attempt to speak to someone else's chronic pain and suffering, if you yourself have never suffered.

So please, if there is someone out there who would be interested in writing a collaborative outtake for this story where Bella helps another prostitute who is in a bad situation to get out of the industry...then by all means, hit me up, help me give those people a voice too.

Because I do not for one second believe that giving this character a voice has taken anything away from the other 99.5%.

A rising tide raises all ships.

If we learn to treat the "Inaras" and the "Satines" of the world as people, then don't we by extention also learn to treat other, more vulnerable sex-workers as people too?

Perhaps you disagree.

Perhaps you think that a narrative meant to help women stop throwing the word "whore" around carelessly at other women is irresponsible and insulting.

You're certainly entitled to think that.

But please don't ever think that my intention here was just to "write a fun story".

Every time I put pen to paper, it is with the intention of conveying a message.

I am not someone who does this for fun.

I am someone who writes because it is what I feel called to do.

I am someone who attempts to give a voice to those who don't have one.

And recently in my life, I have started having difficult conversations with those around me that I feel need to be had.

Consider this one of them.

My goal is to shine a light on the injustices in the world and help to correct them.

Perhaps you think I am failing at that, and maybe you're right.

But I am only just beginning on this path. And I know if I am failing, I am at least failing upward.

So my promise to you all is this:

I will continue to provide content that delivers a message.

If you feel my message needs work, then please, continue letting me know. I am always willing to give due consideration to my own behaviors and try to improve.

If you read one of my older stories, and something in it rubs you the wrong way...talk to me about it. If I agree that it needs to be changed, I will change it.

This time, I happen to not agree.

I've already received a private message from someone in the broader sex industry stating that they felt my portrayal was (for them) accurate representation. This tells me all I need to know, because it means that someone out there has felt heard and respected by reading this story and honestly, there is no greater praise than that.

So thank you, to each and every person who has taken the time to read this story.

There will be outtakes in the future at some point after I finish some of my other works.

In the meantime, as always, I am curious to hear your thoughts.

Love and Blessings to all,

-BMW