I'm kind of new to the series, so please forgive any mistakes I've done. This takes place during the first Shindo-Touya match right after Sai leaves. (I don't need to put spoiler warnings, right? Everyone knows that, right? ^_^) While this isn't my first fic in the HikaGo series, I rather like it better than the other. Though I'm a fan of shonen ai, I rather like Shindo and Touya's vague relationship.

Disclaimer: All characters, not even the elevator and McDonalds, are mine. They are all owned by their respective owners.

Comments and criticisms are welcomed, including grammar slips, though I don't really reply immediately. Thanks and enjoy! :)

Building Towards

The silence inside the elevator was deafening.

And even if Touya Akira knew it would only last until the elevator reached the ground floor, the silence still felt unnatural. After all, his companion was more than enough to keep a conversation going and even then, Akira knew for a fact that the said companion more often than not held one-sided conversations with himself. However, that same companion had fallen silent once the elevator door had closed and the last insult had fallen from Akira's lips. Right now, Shindo Hikaru was steadfastly staring at the floor indicator, as if willing the lighted numbers to change faster.

Akira feared he might also be wishing the elevator to fall.

He thought for something--anything!--to say. He did not like this awkwardness between them, especially since they were finally playing after such a long time. The game they had just left was only moving into yose, and Akira would not allow any tension between them before they continue.

God knows it would be better if he left. He had already decided that once the elevator door opened and Shindo stepped out, he would return to the lounge and contemplate the words they had exchanged. Maybe Shindo's adamant refusal to admit his knowledge concerning everything Akira had sought to find will finally sink in.

He was about to speak when there was a soft BING and the elevator door slid open.

Akira glanced at Shindo just as the other thought to turn to him. Their glances met and there was another sizzle of tension.

Akira straightened his shoulders, refusing to look away. Shindo blinked before snapping, "You look like I'm gonna kill you."

And without waiting for a reply, Shindo stepped out of the elevator. Not helping himself, Akira stuck out a tongue at him, then was thankful no one in the main hall was watching them. No one would ever live down a scene where Touya Akira, 1-dan, actually did something childish.

So in that moment Shindo took another step, Akira reached out to press the elevator keys to return to the gaming lounge and await the end of lunch hour. The door was already sliding to a close.

"WAIT!"

From outside, a hand shot out and grabbed the door before it completely closed. Akira was about to apologize for not waiting when he realized who it was.

Hikaru glared at him. "Wanna eat lunch with me?" he said loudly.

Akira blinked at him. "Do I what?"

"You deaf or something?!"

"Aren't you?" Akira snapped back. Ashiwara-san had cheerfully declared, loud enough to break anyone's concentration, that Touya Akira did not each lunch, especially when that lunch break came in the middle of a game. Akira did not know how Shindo could have missed a voice as blaring as that.

Still, Hikaru's arm stretched to hold the elevator doors, machine humming threateningly in protest to the force against it. The bleach-haired boy was glaring at him.

And even if Akira DID eat lunch occasionally, the expression on Shindo's face was enough reason to refuse. He did not WANT to spend time with this person whom he'd just acknowledged as his true rival, did not want to eat with him, and did not want to have anything to DO with him, outside Go related activities.

It had not simply occurred to him.

So Akira could not understand why he answered, "There's a miso stand nearby, newly-opened."

Hikaru scowled and beckoned for him to step out of the elevator. "Not miso, it just CAN'T be miso. Ramen." He crossed his arms smugly and nodded.

Akira glared at him, faintly hearing the doors behind him close with a soft thud. "Why should it be ramen?"

"Because I said so!" Side-by-side, they made their way towards the main doorway of the Go Institute.

It was Akira's turn to scowl. "What, there's a law saying we should have ramen for lunch?"

"Don't you eat ramen?"

"I just don't want to eat ramen for lunch now."

"Well I don't want miso!" Hikaru wailed.

"And I don't want ramen!"

"How can anyone NOT like ramen?!"

"Maybe you shouldn't have invited me," Akira suggested.

"Are you saying I'm wrong?!"

And the argument went on, the two walking towards an unknown direction on the sidewalk, loud voices enough to be heard by the other passers-by.

~ * ~

In the end, they ended up at the nearest McDonalds'.

Neither knew how they got there, their feet just happened to lead them towards its entrance. And when they realized where they were, another argument erupted with Akira accusing Hikaru of manipulating him to come there, and Hikaru yelling he did no such thing.

However, when they sat down together, another silence engulfed them as Hikaru tore the wrapping of his burger. Akira raised an eyebrow at his companion's barbaric way of eating and carefully unwrapped his own before settling down to eat.

Hikaru watched him for a moment before commenting, "The burger's not gonna bite back, ya know."

"Quit picking on the way I eat," Akira retorted. "You don't hear me complaining about your lack of manners."

Hikaru made an indiscernible reply. Akira gave a snort as the other boy choked on his food and washed it down with his drink. Then, fearing they would erupt into another argument, he asked stiffly, "What made you play Go again, by the way?"

There was a pause. Curiously, Akira thought he saw Hikaru pale but it must be the result of staring at the half-eaten burger. He took a bite and waited for a reply.

"That was months ago," Hikaru murmured, but he shook his head and said aloud, "I felt like doing it again."

"Is everything you do in Go a result of what you FELT like doing?" Akira asked.

"You don't have to be sarcastic." Hikaru chomped off a part of his burger and swallowed before replying, "And what's it to you, anyway?"

"I have a right," Akira said before stopping. No, he didn't. He had no right to pry over Shindo's affairs. They had never been friends, not even acquaintances. One lunch together did not make them chums and nothing was going to change that. Feeling awkward, he bit into his burger.

But Hikaru was watching him with a half-smile. "I just felt like I needed some time off. You know, work some things out." It was said nonchalantly but Akira, hyper-sensitive when it came to Shindo's voice mode, was aware there was a trace of sadness in his voice. It made him remember that time he had asked Hikaru why he had stopped playing, and the answer was so laced with pain that Akira even felt a dull ache somewhere inside him.

He shook that thought away and continued, "But you resolved it finally?"

"I'm playing again, aren't I?" Hikaru wrinkled his nose at him.

"Just because you're playing again doesn't mean everything's alright," Akira pointed out. Then, not helping himself, he asked, "Did it end out all right?"

"It hasn't end, I think," Hikaru half-murmured, "but what's important is that I was forgiven."

There was spine-tingling moment where Akira felt they weren't talking about the same thing but were understanding the essence of it. So, trying to sound casual, he mentioned, "Was it about Sai?"

"Sa--ARGH! No, you're NOT going to trick me into revealing anything to you!" Hikaru pointed a half-eaten burger at him. "You...you tricky bastard! I have no weaknesses!"

Akira had a feeling that line was taken from an anime. Sighing but placidly returning to his eating, he said, "If you say so."

After taking another bite of his own burger, Hikaru spoke again, "Can I ask you a question?"

Akira resisted pointing out that he already DID ask a question. "I can't really stop you."

"Have you beaten your father yet?"

Startled, the black-haired boy raised his eyes and saw Hikaru watching him curiously. Akira raised an eyebrow. "What's it to you?"

"If you beat him," Hikaru said slowly, as if thinking, "what would happen then? What would be left?"

A cold feeling washed over Akira, and he suddenly did not feel the need to finish his lunch. He put down his burger and folded his hands over his lap, well out of Shindo's line of sight. "No, I haven't beaten him, but I intend to. After that, who knows?"

"But you've gotta think about it sometimes," Hikaru insisted.

"I'll think about it when I get there, Shindo."

"Would it be the Hand of God?" Hikaru wondered, staring down at his lunch. "Maybe you're right, it's such a long way off, but what if something happens before then?"

Akira got that funny feeling they weren't talking about his father anymore. Shindo, strangely enough, could make him think and feel a lot of things in less than an hour's worth of lunch break. It was, despite his reluctance, intellectually stimulating while it was emotionally draining. He chose his answer carefully: "It would be disappointing. But I rather think I'd be more concerned with the other event happening than achieving the Hand of God. If the other event is more important."

"If you beat your father," Hikaru said again, "would he be proud?"

"Why don't you ask him?" Akira suggested gently.

Hikaru seemed startled at the idea, then he looked more distressed. "I can't, not anymore."

"Is there someone you'd like to beat, Shindo?"

"YES!" Hikaru burst out. He popped the last bit of burger in his mouth, chewed, and swallowed before declaring, "More than anything, I'd like to beat that person!"

There was a vehemence in his assertion that made Akira wither.

"More than anything, I'd like to beat YOU!"

But everything was alright again. Fighting the rising grin on his face, he let it curl instead to a smirk followed by a taunt, "Not today, you're not."

"Punk!" Hikaru raged.

Akira had to laugh. "We'll see about that."

Silence again.

Hikaru eyed Akira's unfinished lunch. "You gonna eat that?"

~ * ~

The game ended predictably, but satisfyingly. When they both bowed and murmured the customary thanks, Hikaru turned to Waya before Akira could point out his mistakes, leaving the other to stand and go to the board and record the result.

Going to the lounge to collect his bag and shoes, Akira was met by Ashiwara-san, who was merrily waving goodbye to a red-faced Saeki-san. "Good game, Akira-kun?" the cheerful man asked him.

Akira smiled, nodding. "Yeah," he said softly.

"Are you going to the Go salon?"

The younger shook his head. "No, I'm going home now. Mother will be waiting and I still have some homework."

"It's hard not having anyone else to play there, isn't it?" Ashiwara clucked. Like a shrink, he always made the most outrageous comments concerning Akira's behavior.

Sometimes, he hit too close to home. "Something like that."

"Why don't you invite Shindo-kun to play a friendly game?" the older man asked, raising an eyebrow. "After all, you two looked like you were having fun with your speed Go earlier."

Blushing a bright red, Akira stammered, "I didn't realize..." How embarrassing to be caught playing a game seemingly without deep concentration! But that had only happened against Shindo. The rest of Akira's games were too intense and serious. While this game against Shindo was those two as well, there was also a part of it that made Akira look forward to the endless games lining up behind them. It was more fun than their last other games, infinitely more than the other games he played against other opponents.

But Ashiwara only laughed. "I'm sure he'd like it if you invited him."

"He has a lot of people to play against," Akira assured him, stepping into his shoes and tapping it to fit his foot snugly.

"Are you sure?"

The two glanced at Hikaru, who was on his way towards them, still conversing with Waya. The older one was laughing while Hikaru was giving him a friendly shove.

"I'm sure," Akira said firmly.

"I heard," Ashiwara said, "that he had no master, and that he entirely learned to play in a school Go club."

Akira looked down at his shoes. "Yes, he did."

"How lonely. So then, Akira-kun, you've got nothing to lose." The man briefly placed a hand on Akira's arm before slinging his bag over his shoulder and making his way to the elevator, whistling a cheery tune.

"See you, Waya!" Hikaru was saying as Waya Yoshitaka put on his shoes. Akira looked away quickly, but already noticed that the other boy was glaring at him. Hefting his bag on his shoulder, he left the two to put on their shoes and went to the window.

To think that Shindo Hikaru played only a few people in-between games was a ridiculous notion. A boy as fired up as he would have opponents lining up against him, playing friendly games or even not-so-friendly ones. He would have masters and pros teaching him, while Akira's only real teacher had been his father, not that he minded.

But, if Ashiwara-san was right...

He risked a glance at Hikaru and saw that the boy was struggling to untangle the laces of his shoes.

...it would be a lonely way of learning.

When Waya laughingly went ahead, leaving Hikaru to struggle with his laces, Akira neared him. Hikaru glanced up at him, surprised. "Oh, Touya, you're still here."

"Um, yeah. I thought I'd talk to Amano-san before leaving, but I just remembered he's not here." The lie was hard to formulate, as Akira had never been good at lying. Before he could seriously interpret the strange look Hikaru gave him, he rushed on, "Look, Shindo, I just wanted to ask, you want to get better, right?"

"Yeah, of course," Hikaru said confidently.

"But you DO know you made lots of mistakes during our game."

Hikaru's eyes narrowed. "What's your point?" he asked flatly.

Akira felt himself break into sweats. "Do you play with anyone, just for practice?"

"I have Morishita-sensei's study group," Hikaru ventured. "And I sometimes play against Isumi-san or Waya, or the bunch of insei I know. Why?"

"Besides the study group and Waya-san, anyone else?"

"My friend sometimes in the Go club...look, why are you asking?"

"How did you get better?!" Akira blurted out in frustration.

Hikaru scowled. "What, it's too weird that I actually GOT better?!" he yelled out. "I'll have you know that I used to practice with someone so good every night!"

"Used to?" Akira asked.

The anger in Hikaru's face drained and he looked down to fuss over his already untangled shoelaces. "Yeah, but we stopped playing already. He moved away." Again, that strange sadness.

"Do you...do you want play in the Go salon?"

Hikaru froze. There was a moment of complete silence when Akira could swear he could hear the whole building settle and the other furnitures heave a sigh. There, he had said it. Now, he could leave. He was about to turn away when Hikaru asked, voice shaking, "For sure?"

"You have a habit of questioning all of what I say," Akira said, annoyed.

"That's because you always say unexpected things," Hikaru snapped.

"Just like you!"

"But, really?" The amazement in Hikaru's voice did not leave and he quickly retied his shoelaces and stood up, eyes not leaving Akira's. "'Cause...'cause if you don't mean it...I mean, if you..."

"Of COURSE I mean it! I wouldn't have asked if I didn't." Trying to fight the wide smile threatening to cover his whole face, he said casually, "We can play a game sometimes, you know...I can help you."

"Or I can help you!" Hikaru cried gleefully.

"What makes you think I need any help?"

"You're really good, Touya, but even YOU make mistakes."

"You--"

"Sure!" Hikaru interrupted, grinning. Akira envied him of his carefree expressions, all showing themselves on his face without fear of judgment. He didn't have that luxury. "I'd like it."

"Tomorrow? After class, we can meet there." Still trying not to sound excited but not actually achieving. "You remember the way, right?"

"Yeah, it's near our school. Look, I have cleaning duty but I'll be there at around 4, is that okay?"

"Perfect."

And it was. Seeing Hikaru's face light up like that was worth the doubts and self-commissions he earlier committed himself to. Somewhere along the long time since their first meeting, he had forgotten somehow that Hikaru was also a boy who needed the same things he thought he did not need but did. While rivalry was an accepted relationship they had assumed without thinking, friendship was one they could tackle, too.

Driven by this thought, Akira asked, "You going to the train station?"

"Yeah." Hikaru was thrusting his arms through the slings of his backpack.

"Do you want to walk there together?"

Hikaru eyed him slowly. "I don't think I trust you enough to walk me home, Touya."

Akira froze, stung, and was about to make a scathing remark when he saw the teasing grin twitching Hikaru's mouth. Not helping himself, he gave a laugh and rejoined, "I won't murder you in public, that's for sure."

"You're too proper to resort to murder."

"That's right, I have someone do it for me."

"You admit your crimes!"

"I never admitted anything!"

Still arguing, the two made their way out of the building.

~ * ~

Someplace else, sometime else, someone unfolded a fan, raised it to his face, and behind the paper, allowed a wide smile.

end