"I'm sorry" were the words that he had said to her that day.

She hadn't understood it then, and it infuriated her: that fact that she, the critically acclaimed, talented, RENOWNED Hiyori Asahina couldn't wrap her mind around something as simple as an apology.

"What are you talking about?" She had asked, looking up and locking eyes with him, "What happened this time?"

What was it for? Being gross? Being in her presence? No, he had always been more flustered about things like that. Plus, she had always demanded those apologies, and he followed her words like some sort of kicked puppy. Now, he just looked... wrecked, like he had seen something that he wasn't meant to see.

But she knows that couldn't have been the case. Sure, he was a little quiet when they ate breakfast that day, but she had assumed that it was because of Konoha!

At her confused look, Hibiya smiled softly and looked away, "I dunno. Not doing enough, I guess."

Is this about the shopping incident from yesterday? Probably. He hadn't been able to carry all of her bags and ended up dropping a few things. Maybe she had yelled at him a little too much for that.. She supposed that dropping those few things couldn't entirely be his fault, as the stifling summer heat even made her break a sweat.

"Well, yeah," she scoffed, petting the cat that sat in her lap, "I guess I can't really blame you completely for that though — I hate summer."

The words came naturally to her, and she can't help but feel like she's said them before. There's a familiar pang in her chest, and she can't help but notice the way his face contorted into a scowl at the words.

It's strange, and she doesn't like admitting that. Stroking the cat, she tried to think about when she had said that before - if she had, of course. They had been in the city for about a week, and Hibiya had only shown displeasure about the whole 'Woah! The city is so advanced!' thing 8 times since they got here (including when he started crying because he was too scared to go on the escalator. That was kind of pathetic). But this was the first time he showed displeasure at something she said that didn't involve Konoha.

..Weird.

She felt the cat start to purr loudly, the sound echoing in her eardrums. Underneath her outstretched palm, its soft fur caused her hand to tingle. Normally, she would find such amplified senses weird, but she couldn't take her eyes off of it. It wasn't like she wanted to anyway, It was really cute, and she would TOTALLY take it home if her mom wasn't allergic. That really sucked.

Hibiya's next words were muffled due to the abnormally loud purring in her ears, but she somehow heard them.

"Yeah, I guess I hate it too."

It wasn't the kind of statement that he usually made, the kind where smiled that dopey smile of his and tried to support every single decision she made in hopes of getting on her good side. But now, she finds that misses that stupid side of him, the one that was close to tears when she said she didn't like the keychain he got her.

Jeez, he probably woke up on the wrong side of the bed that morning.

She knew how boys worked. She read too many books for her not to. She's seen the ways they acted around her and other girls in the hallways and knew that there was some weird fan club centered around winning her affections. It was gross, and to some extent she hated it, but she couldn't deny how powerful she felt at the fact that boys groveled at her feet.

(But there's a phrase out there that she hates: "Hiyori Asahina will make a man out of you yet!". She's heard that around their little countryside town far too often, by grown men and women alike, and she absolutely hated it. At 11, she shouldn't be sexualized the way she is. Love letters at school are one thing, grown adults eyeing her are another).

Hibiya was similar to those boys, and she knows damn well that he's associated with the Fanclub. It's a little weird still. He's stupid, shrimpy, and kinda gross, but at least he was putting in the actual effort. He went out of his way for her more times than not, and though it was a little creepy, she still grew to appreciate it (but she wouldn't tell him that. That would be encouraging him, and who knows how many more times he would embarrass both her and himself by continuing to do weird things for her).

"I've seen the way you look at me when you think I don't notice," she says, knowing it'll make him flustered and grins when she watches him splutter. For a moment, he seemed like the boy that she knew yesterday - the one with the stupid smiles and the messy hair that somehow managed to worm his way into her heart.

"What are you talking about? I don't do that!" His shaking voice said otherwise, but she supposed it was respectable (if not a little pathetic) that he tried to defend himself even though it was a losing fight.

"Okay, sure, keep telling yourself that," She rolled her eyes, grinning a little at his exasperated look. He looked kind of like a fish, the ones that they had at the street festivals with the puffed-up cheeks and the gaping mouths. It wasn't a cute look, but she found it funny all the same.

She decided to rub salt in the wound, and locked eyes with him as she said the next few words: "You, Hibiya Amamiya, are a disgusting little man."

"Hey!" He shouted, but said nothing to defend himself because even he knew that there was no way to win against her, and overall deflated with a pout.

She giggled at his flustered look, the kind where his messy hair looked even messier and his face was a bit too pink for it to just be some sort of sunburn, and for a moment took her attention away from the cat. Then the cat decided that that moment was enough, and it stepped out from her lap, reaching its front paws out and arching its back in the weird stretch that cats do, before looking up at Hiyori and mewing.

"What's up?" She asked the cat, turning away from Hibiya to scratch the space between its ears. It chirped in response, leaning into her touch before pulling away.

She didn't see the way Hibiya's face darkened when the cat leaped off of the playground structure, its yellow eyes still trained on her as it began to walk away. It was clear that it wanted her to follow it. Who was she to refuse such an order from such a cute little cat? Cute animals were definitely her weak spot, and maybe she'd be a little kinder to Hibiya if he got her a cute cat keychain instead of the weird dinosaur one he had gotten her last time.

She stood up quickly, dusting off the front of her skirt before getting ready to slide off of the playground structure. This felt weird and she didn't know why. Maybe it was because the sky had dyed itself a sickly shade of red even though it was only noon. Maybe it was because of the low buzzing of the cicadas that seemed to emit from the trees in the park around them. Maybe it was because of the way she felt Hibiya's gaze burn into her back and the feeling in her chest that made her want to drop everything and leave. But her legs had other plans.

Something told her to look back at Hibiya though, so she did, and she saw his face hardened in a way that she hadn't seen before.

"Where are you going?" The brown-haired boy asked, voice laden with a sad sort of skepticism that she hated to hear from him.

"I have to go," she responded simply, ignoring the feeling of dread that was beginning to rise in her chest because the feeling that she had to follow that cat was even greater.

(Her heart was telling her to stay back and with him, and maybe she would've if hearts were what people walked with instead of legs).

The movements came easy to her as if predetermined by some sort of God up in the sky somewhere. She should probably think about how this whole situation gave her a weird sense of deja vu, but after she caught up to the cute-little-cat that had those far-too-alluring yellow eyes.

"Hiyori!" Hibiya called out from behind her because he, of course, followed her like he always did. She didn't take notice, eyes trained on the cat that stared at her from across the sidewalk. Seriously, something being that cute should be illegal.

It's then that she realizes that the traffic light is green and the whir of traffic is far-too-loud in her ears. She's blinded by headlights and deafened by the sound of a horn honking from in front of her. She knows that she's messed up.

She knows it's a car of some sort (a truck, her mind readily supplies despite the fact that she knows that she hasn't been in this situation unless this whole thing was similar to a dream that she's long since forgotten. Why can't she remember? Why does this feel so familiar? Why hasn't she learned? Why can't she move?)

She clenches her fists, but that doesn't stop them from trembling. Time seemed to slow down as she watched the truck swerve. Through the glass, she saw the driver gritting his teeth and frantically steeping on the breaks. She's not stupid - she knows it won't be enough. Even though she's accepted it, fear still locks her in place. She stood there like a deer in the headlights, legs shaking and heart-pounding, knowing that it's then that she's going to die.

During the moment before her untimely demise, she cursed herself for being so stupid. She should've checked both ways before crossing the street. She should've listened to the warning signs that her mind and heart brought to her attention. She should've stayed with Hibiya instead of following the cat. No amount of feline cuteness was worth dying before you had the chance to grow up.

But overall, she wished that she got to say a proper goodbye to everyone and everything. She should've taken a few minutes to clean up her mess in the apartment that morning, she should've taken the time to get the autograph from that one female pop idol that she really liked, she should've said a proper goodbye to Konoha instead of just yelling into his room when she and Hibiya headed out earlier, and Hibiya... She knows she should've been nicer to him. She should've taken the time to appreciate his flustered smiles and the way he stood by her side no matter what she made him do. She should've listened to him instead of following that stupid cat. She should've been honest with him about why she hates summer. She should've told him how she felt—

At age 11, she already had so many regrets. Perhaps letting him be one of them was the worst one of them all.

From the corner of her eye, she sees him staring at her in shock from his place on the sidewalk. He's frozen like she is, hands at fists at his sides and his legs positioned in a way that shouted "I have to do something! I have to save her!".

No, don't! She wants to scream because she knows that acting now will only get him hurt too, but her lungs are just as frozen her legs are and her heart feels like it's encased in ice.

But when their eyes meet, the ice seems to melt a little bit, and her breath rushes out of her chest. His eyes are wide and some sick part of her allows her to smile back at him.

His eyes never leave her face - she can feel it even when she lets her eyes flutter closed. She'd rather the last thing she saw be his face than the sight of her blood smeared against the bumpers of a truck. She'd like to think that, even though she wasn't the kindest human in the world, that she deserved at least that.

It's then she hears a scream from behind her, feels a rough tug on her wrist, and suddenly finds herself flying backward.

Her eyes snap open as the momentum pulls her out of her frozen state, and she stumbles, her feet slipping out from under her like some sort of newborn deer. A blur of blue and white is in front of her, and now, she sees Hibiya returning her smile. But instead of her smiling back at him from what was supposed to be her death place, he's the one in front of the truck.

"NO!"

He must've heard her yell because he mouths something, but the sound of the horn and her own heartbeat in her ears is too loud and she can't catch the words. The three syllables are thrown to the wind as she tried to comprehend all that was going on around her.

But it's then that time speeds up and the truck slams into him... and Hiyori's world comes crashing to an end.

It's then that the streetlights decided to become the personification of life - strong, then flickering, and then washed out by the sound of his blood splattering the sidewalk. It's then that she remembers everything.

"HIBIYA!"

She feels sick because this shouldn't be happening. Not again, not ever. How could she forget?

She rushes forward, just like he had a moment ago (and so, so many times ago), and fell to her knees at his side, her screams morphing into sobs.

"You idiot! Why did you do that? Why would you give yourself up for me?" She tugs at his collar, once white - now a sickly shade of red, "Is this why you said sorry earlier?"

She shuts her eyes and tries to imagine that she feels his warmth beneath her, that his heart is steady against her, and that he's alive in time with the beat. But instead, all she feels is the sticky, wet feeling of his blood and the rawness in her throat as she screamed.

"This better be a joke! This is just payback for making you carry all of my shopping bags, right?" She chokes on her words, trying her best to ignore the way her tears dropped onto his clammy skin, "please - please just tell me it is.."

But there was no answer, and she knows there won't be one ever again, at least in this life. But there's some sick, desperate part of her mind that still thinks that she can save him - save this broken, mangled body that had given up its short time on earth for her.

She now knows why she never liked summer, why there was always some sort of pang in her chest whenever she even thought about it. She, Hiyori Asahina, was a far-from-simple girl who liked things pristine, clean, and perfect. She was a girl who wanted everything to be nothing short of the way she wanted. She was a girl with the heart of ice who never warmed up for anybody.

And somehow, for better or for worse, these blood-stained summers managed to thaw her heart with the fleeting feelings of love, rip it out of her chest, and then tear it in two.

There's a buzzing in her ears that drowns out her screams - the cicadas. Almost mockingly, they seem to come to life at that moment, taking to the sky and turning it into a canvas of blacks, yellows, and reds.

But she doesn't hear them. There's only static in her mind as she cradled his body in her lap, for once not caring about the way that his blood stained her dress. What she cared about, however, was that his eyes were still open, devoid of life but still looking solely at her with a sickly brown hue akin to those of dead leaves in the winter and the dark chocolates that she could never bring herself to enjoy.

Why? She thinks, Why us? Why him?

Once again, there's no satisfactory answer, and she's only met with the sound of the cicadas, police sirens, and her own ragged screams.

She doesn't take notice of the clad-in-white figure that stood across the street from them, arm outstretched, as if he wanted to reach out but couldn't bring himself to. She doesn't take notice of the crowd forming around her - of the pitying comments and the tears that weren't hers. She doesn't take notice of the white-and-blue and the black-and-red figures standing across from her, staring at her with a mixture of pity and contempt as the world that she had come to know begun to rewind once again.

From across the street, a curious black cat watched on, seemingly satisfied with this outcome with the way that its yellow eyes gleamed.

A nearby clock read: August 15th, 12:30 noon.

Then again, when was it not?

Red was the color that flashed across her vision that day, the color that burned itself beneath her eyelids and deep into her retinas.

And now, as the blood of the boy she had fallen for stained the ground, she wished she wouldn't have to see it again.

She woke up with a gasp.

She's sweating, and the aching in her chest only seemed to be getting stronger, more prominent, and accompanied the feeling of her heart throbbing against her ribcage. Her breath comes out in short pants, and her hands are trembling but she can't bring herself to breathe. She finds that she doesn't want to because as she gains more and more awareness of what's going on around her, as she hears her phone buzz with the notification that it's 12:15, and as she chokes back a sob, only one thought crosses her mind:

I guess I failed again.