Defeated by her inability to sell any makeup, and her total failure at faking her way into a job as a nanny, Brittany returns to her parents' apartment in Flushing. Her mother is in the kitchen cooking dinner, and she feels exactly twelve years old as she sinks down onto the couch. This definitely isn't where she saw herself at nearly thirty, and when she looks at her phone to see text messages from Sugar complaining about working with Quinn, she just throws it to the side. Her life is in total shambles, and all she needs is some dose of good luck to turn it around.

"Ma, what am I supposed to do? I dropped out of college to work in Dani's stupid bridal shop, I have no real skills, no girlfriend, and I'm living with my mother."

"It's no picnic living with you either, kid." Whitney Piece opens the doorway between the kitchen and the living room and holds a raw chicken in her hands. "You're really butting in on mine and your father's private time."

"Ew, Mom, gross. I don't need to hear about that. I'm having enough of a terrible day."

"I say you march back down to that Ms. Lopez's mansion and give her a piece of your mind."

"What's that even going to do? She didn't do anything to me. If I'm going to give anyone a piece of my mind, it's going to be Dani Fucking Harper for cheating on me and firing me. She's the one that got me into this situation."

"You're the one that got yourself into this situation. I warned you about Dani when you started dating her. You wouldn't let me look you up with Jeannie's nice son Artie who would have married you and made you a millionaire. A millionaire, you hear me? He just sold his first tech company for five-hundred million dollars. But instead, you chose Dani with the bridal shop."

"Why do you have to make everything worse? I went on a date with Artie, and he so wasn't into reenacting my Lady and the Tramp fantasy and kept talking to me like he was some kind of rapper. It's not like I expected Dani to cheat on me."

"She was shifty, I would have expected it."

"Gee, thanks Mom." Brittany rolls her eyes, and then, from where it landed under the couch when she tossed it, Brittany's phone begins to ring. She stoops down to pick it up, and she furrows her brow when she sees a strange 212 area code light up the screen. "I guess I should take this, it's probably someone calling to tell me that I have to sell my kidneys in order to survive the next month."

"Only sell one, or else you'll die, and your father and I will be responsible for paying back that ten thousand dollars in student loans you took out."

"You're just full of hope today, aren't you?" Brittany sighs and presses the accept call button on her phone. "Hello?"

"Hello, is this Miss Pierce?"

"Um, yeah, who's this?"

"Santana Lopez, we met earlier."

"Right, how could I forget the gorgeous millionaire with the big mansion?"

"Gorgeous millionaire, I'm listening." Whitney sits down next to Brittany, and she shoos her away.

"I've reconsidered what I said earlier. You seemed to have a way with Tyler, and I'd like to hire you on a trial basis, assuming you can move in today and start immediately."

"Move in? It's a live-in position?"

"Well yes, is that going to be a problem?"

"I'll be there as soon as I can pack my bags. Oh, thank you, Ms. Lopez, thank you! You won't regret this."

"I have some reason to believe that I will…but I'll see you this afternoon."

In less than an hour, Brittany packs up everything she owns and is in the back of a cab headed toward Manhattan. She thinks she probably should be nervous, but she's not, she's totally got this and she's going to show Ms. Lopez that she's totally wrong about thinking she's going to regret hiring her. Kids absolutely love her, she's sure that she'll win over Tyler with his fake blood, Abigail with her whining and Valerie with her sad eyes. It's going to be a total piece of cake, she just knows it.

"Miss Pierce." The butler opens the door when she gets there and hurries out to the cab to go help her with her things. Most of the stuff in the apartment she shared with Dani wasn't hers, so she really just has four suitcases chock full of clothes and a big Rubbermaid bin full of shoes.

Brittany looks around the house and it's surprisingly quiet. Something about it reminds her of The Sound of Music, her absolute favorite comfort movie when she was a kid, and she eyes the drapes, hoping she doesn't have to teach herself how to sew in order to make the kids play clothes. Shaking her head, she moves over to the side table and reaches out to touch what is probably a very expensive crystal vase when she hears footsteps and then retracts her hand.

"I'd appreciate if you didn't touch the antiques." Santana puts her hand on her hip and cocks her head to the side. "And I expect I won't have to watch over you while you're watching the children."

"Why do you have antiques in a house full of kids anyway?"

"We taught them from a young age what was theirs to touch and what wasn't. I've never had a problem before."

"Even with Tyler?"

"Well—" Santana begins and then is stopped by the sound of screeching coming into the room.

"Mommy! Look at my dolly! Tyler ripped her head right off and put it in the toilet bowl!" Abigail cried.

"I did not!" Tyler tumbles into the room. "She's a big fat liar. She did it herself just to get me in trouble."

"A new doll for Abigail will be coming right out of your allowance, young man." Santana furrows her brow and looks between the children. "Both of you, say hello to Miss Pierce."

"Miss Pierce? No way, I'm just Brittany."

"I'd prefer if the children called you Miss Pierce."

"And I'd prefer if they called me Brittany." Brittany challenges. "Listen, Abigail, I'm an expert doll fixer. Why don't you come upstairs with me and we'll get her all taken care of?"

An hour later, Abigail's doll is fixed, Tyler is distracted with a new bucket of Legos that Kurt—the butler, now that Brittany has learned his name—brought out and Brittany is almost finished unpacking. She's not sure where Valerie is, though she thinks she should probably be aware of that, and she wonders exactly how one nannies a fifteen-year-old. It's not like she needs dolls fixed or lessons in not using ketchup as fake blood, but Brittany is sure she'll learn on the job.

"Miss Pierce." Kurt knocks on the door to her bedroom and Brittany cringes a little at everyone in this house and their formalities. "Dinner is served."

Brittany makes her way down the stairs and into the dining room, but when she gets there, she realizes that there are only four places set. She wrinkles her nose a little and looks to Kurt, who is puzzled by her expression. He holds out his hand toward the kitchen, apparently assuming that's where she'll eat and Brittany's eyebrows raise.

"The nanny normally eats in there on her own while Ms. Lopez has meals with the children."

"Well that's ridiculous." Brittany goes into the kitchen and picks up the plate set for her, carrying into the dining room. "Isn't a nanny supposed to be part of the family? I'll be eating with them."

Valerie comes into the dining room first and gives Brittany the same strange look that Kurt did. Brittany is in utter shock that any other nanny put up with this and she simply unfolds her napkin and puts it on her lap like she's seen people do in movies. At home, she mostly used paper towels as napkins and can't really understand why anyone would think cloth napkins were a better idea, but she guesses she may as well learn how to fit in with these rich people.

"You know you're supposed to eat in the kitchen." Valerie tells her, standing behind her own chair.

"Maybe that's how it used to be, but if I'm going to spend all my time with you, I think I should at least be able to eat with you."

"Miss Pierce." Santana comes in, followed by Abigail and Tyler. "You're—"

"Supposed to eat in the kitchen, I know. I—" Brittany tries to think of the most appropriate response to her new boss. "I think it's better for the kids to see me eating with the family, then they know they should respect me."

"Well. Alright then." Santana sits down.

Dinner is the weirdest thing Brittany has ever experienced. Not a single one of them talk. She keeps trying to start a conversation, get everyone to at least pretend they're at the table with other people, but no one takes the bait. She watches Tyler hide his broccoli in his napkin, watches Abigail obsessively sort her food, watches Valerie eat more slowly than she's ever seen a human being eat and watches Santana look down at her phone every thirty seconds. Then, just when she feels like she's about to explode, Rachel Berry barges into the dining room with a flourish.

"I just got off the phone with Brody Weston, he wants to have dinner with us tonight." She shrieks. "This could be our chance to land Broadway's biggest star. Lin Manuel Miranda doesn't stand a chance against us if we get him!"

"Let's go." Santana stands up, pushing her plate away. "Miss Pierce, I expect you'll be alright getting the children to bed?"

"You've got it. What, like ten o'clock?"

"No. More like eight o'clock. Valerie can stay up until nine-thirty."

"Right…" Brittany shakes her head, thinking maybe Valerie is way too old to have a nine-thirty bedtime, but she's not going to argue with her boss. "Uh, have fun."

"Miss Pierce." Rachel's voice gets high and shrill. "We are not doing this for fun."

They leave the dining room and Brittany looks around at the three kids. Abigail looks crestfallen, Tyler looks like he's planning something and Valerie just looks completely aloof to the entire situation. Maybe it's weird, but Brittany wants to know more about Ms. Lopez. She's living in her house after all and if feels weird that they've exchanged maybe one-hundred words. But she's not exactly about to ask, the woman was weird enough about her sitting at the dinner table with them and even weirder about the kids calling her Brittany, so she thinks if she actually asks something personal her head will explode.

"So…what's up guys?" Brittany asks. "You know there's no law that you have to be quiet at the dinner table, right?"

"Mom would rather we are." Abigail pipes up. "She's usually really busy doing work on her phone."

"Well guess what, she's not here, so talk away."

Brittany isn't surprised that she's still met with utter silence, but she rolls her eyes a little. It's clear that these kids have no idea how to just be kids and she thinks of The Sound of Music again. Maybe she does need to learn how to saw so she can make them play clothes out of the curtains, bring them to Central Park and let them run around and scream. It seems like it would do each of them good, probably Tyler, especially, since he seems to need to get into mischief to actually express himself.

After dinner is done, all three kids go to their rooms. Brittany is pretty sure that she hears Valerie's door slam, but she can't be sure. Figuring this is just what they do, Brittany goes into the kitchen to try and get some dirt out of Kurt. She could see a gleam in his eye when she met him earlier in the day and she just knows he'll be willing to spill some gossip.

"So, what's the deal Kurt? Tell me all about these people."

"Miss Pierce—"

"Okay, let's just put an end to that right now. Brittany, okay?"

"Brittany. Fine. But seriously, you've been here like three hours and you already want me to gossip?"

"I know you live for it." Brittany laughs a little. "So, tell me everything there is to know about Ms. Lopez."

"You got me." Kurt rolls his eyes at himself. "Thank God I finally have someone to talk to, I wait all month for my butler's association meetings to just gab about everything."

"I knew it! So, what's her deal?"

"She's trying to be this big-time producer, she's like, insanely jealous of Lin Manuel Miranda, you can't even bring him up around her, she'll go absolutely apeshit."

"But Ms. Berry—"

"Yeah, she does it all the time, I think she thinks it motivates her, which, honestly, it probably does. But basically, they're always having these investors fall through every time they think they're going to have this big hit. They passed on Dear Evan Hansen, so, there's that."

"And Ms. Berry? Are they like…together?"

"Oh my God, disgusting." Kurt feigns a gag. "But actually, Ms. Berry wishes. She follows Ms. Lopez around like a little puppy dog and is basically ready to throw herself in her arms at any given second. It's so gross to watch, but it's like a car wreck, I can't look away."

"And what about the kids' dad?"

"Mama, actually. Do you have like no gaydar? I could sense you were one of us from a mile away."

"Hey…I'm bi." Brittany crosses her arms over her chest.

"Still one of us. And she died two years ago, she was hit by a car and it destroyed Ms. Lopez. Miss Abigail was only three, she doesn't remember her at all and Mr. Tyler was four so he has a few memories. Miss Valerie is still angry."

"I can see that. She has barely said two words to me."

"She doesn't want to get attached, you don't even know how many nannies we've gone through around here."

"So why did Ms. Lopez decide to hire me anyway?"

"Desperation?" Kurt chuckles. "And also, I may have planted the seed in her head."

"Why?"

"Because you looked like a kicked puppy when you showed up here. So now that I've told you about her, what's your deal."

"I mean, I got dumped and fired on the same day…by the same person, so that's pretty much how I ended up here. The only thing I know about kids is from hanging out with my little cousins, my mom is desperate for me to get married, that's about it."

"Hmm." Kurt looks off into the distance and Brittany furrows her brow.

"What?"

"Huh? No, nothing, I was just thinking about something."

"C'mon, you have to tell me!"

"You'll find out in due time, I just know it."