A/N: HI, guys! I didn't abandon you, or this story! So, this AU ended up being HUGE, so this chapter is a bit ... lengthy. Sorry! Hopefully, you guys like how I incorporated this. The next chapter is Mix and Match, though I'm pretty sure I misinterpreted it? LOL Either way, only two more chapters to go! I know Usa/Mamo week is technically over, I will get the next chapter out to you guys soon!

This chapter was duel betaed by RogueAlly, then also NinjetteTwitch that... er who (sorry, Twitch!) is feeling a little bit better, and I'm glad, cause I heart her to the moon and back!

Thank you, all of you, for being so awesome. This is the most supportive fandom in existence.

Chapter 5- AU

Part 2

In which the 'L' word never sounded so sweet

There was so much they needed to talk about. Usagi wanted to know more about how Mamoru had come to be Tuxedo Mask and why he searched for the Silver Imperium Crystal. She wanted to ask him about his strange, sort-of but not-really confession of love for Sailor Moon. She also wanted to kiss him senseless. However, first and foremost, they needed to figure out how they were going to get out of here before DreamWeaver managed to suck them dry.

They didn't have time to talk about any of that, though, because as it turns out, being a parent to a toddler and a teething baby was freaking hard. And they barely had time to exchange two words, much less discuss all of the things they needed to.

Chibiusa liked to say no. A lot. And the temper tantrums that resulted from reasonable requests like, "No, don't pull your sister's hair," or "No, it's not a good idea to stick your doll in the garbage disposal," completely baffled Usagi. It had only been less than four hours since Makoto had walked out the door. Already, Chibiusa had cried that she was starving and then promptly threw her plate off the table because she didn't like the gyudon Mamoru had expertly whipped up, which in Usagi's opinion was incredibly delicious.

Then Mamoru, looking as disheveled and helpless as she felt, had resorted to googling everything baby and toddler related, compiling frantic lists. In the meantime, she'd attempted to handle a wailing, miserable Kousagi, who, when you did not put on a diaper correctly, needed a thorough cleaning.

Of course, Usagi had no idea that you aren't supposed to leave a toddler alone. So, while she was bathing a screaming Kousagi, (Oh god, the water was too hot. Had she burned her? But it didn't feel too hot? So why wouldn't she stop crying?!) Chibiusa took it upon herself to draw all over the walls. She'd found the markers in the bag that Makoto had brought in- how was Usagi supposed to know that she should have put that away? Then Chibiusa peppered the baby powder that Usagi had carelessly left on the floor all over the place. The bottle had tumbled to the floor when she'd peeled off a sodden onesie off of Kousagi, while trying not to gag, and she'd forgotten to pick it up again.

Usagi was convinced that this was the Cardian's plan. To suck the energy from them via little demon children that must have somehow innately sensed that they were both seriously out of their depth and had decided to run rampant.

She was not cut out for this. How could anyone be cut out for this?

It was almost midnight by the time they'd managed to feed, bathe, and wrangle the kids to sleep. The house was a disaster of epic proportions, and Usagi had a newfound respect for her mother.

Usagi was splayed out on the couch, still wearing Mamoru's shirt and the bunny shorts, though she had somewhat tamed her hair into something manageable when Mamoru crept down the stairs. More than likely leaving Kousagi's room, as it had taken hours, and a hundred different methods courtesy of Mamoru's research, before she'd finally settled and fallen asleep.

She groaned, grimacing as she craned her neck to the side, and her eyes locked onto Mamoru, who looked exhausted, ruffled, and for the first time, he seemed less put together than she did.

Still, when his gaze met hers, and his eyes swept over her on the couch, his expression softened, he still managed to smirk as he leaned against the doorjamb, crossing his arms.

Usagi grimaced, annoyed that he was still calm and collected while she was a frazzled, hot mess. She resisted the urge to stick her tongue out at him, deciding that was probably just as childish as the way Chibiusa had sullenly stated that she was never going to sleep because there were too many things to play with in her room.

Instead, she sighed, feeling miserable because if she'd ever had a chance with Mamoru before, it was probably totally gone now. She was a disaster, and never in a million years had she imagined letting him see her like this. They'd barely had one date. One date.

She blinked, suppressing the urge to cry as she twisted her neck to look up at the ceiling and sigh forlornly instead. "That didn't go well, Mamo-chan."

He didn't say anything, but she heard the rustle of fabric and a small thud as he kicked aside one of Chibiusa's toys before his face hovered over her, blocking her view of the tiny painted crack that she'd been focusing on.

"I think we did okay," he replied, eyes soft as they fixed onto her face. "Tomorrow might be easier, we—"

Usagi's eyes narrowed, and she gasped, bolting upright, forcing him to take a step back. "Mamo-chan, we can't do this again tomorrow," she rasped, and it was irrational, but she was tired, hungry, and deep down, she sort of felt like she was a failure. "We have to find a way to get out of here. Who knows how this works! The Cardian could be sucking us dry right now as we speak."

Mamoru's jaw clenched, and he didn't respond for a moment, his expression hardened before he sighed, shoulders slumping as he lowered himself to sit on the couch beside her, raking his hand over his face.

"Okay," he replied, tone quiet and resigned. "What do you suggest, Usako?"

His expression was earnest, without reproach. Usagi deflated a little, curling her legs so that she was sitting cross-legged across from him, chewing her lower lip as she seriously contemplated it.

Of course, she had no idea how they were going to get out of here. It was clear from her brief interaction with Makoto, and the fact that both she and Mamoru couldn't transform, that nobody knew about the Senshi. She could only hope that the real-life Senshi were fighting the Cardian out there to rescue them at this very moment. That, or she was going to have to figure out a way to wake them up.

Her brow furrowed, and she scooted forward to close the small distance between her and Mamoru. They were so close now that her knees pressed into his thigh. His breath visibly hitched as she leaned forward and, without thinking and only because it was really worth a try, she lifted her hand and pinched his arm.

He hissed through his teeth, jumping with surprise, eyes narrowed accusingly as he pulled away and rubbed the sore spot on his arm. "Ow, what was—" he paused mid-sentence, catching on way quicker than she would have before his eyes widened in disbelief. "Did you just pinch me to see if it would wake me up?"

Usagi shrugged, unashamed, lifting her chin defiantly. "What?" she defended, laughter laced into her tone. "It was totally worth a try."

She wasn't sure what possessed her to do what she did next. Maybe it was because she was tired and the ability to think through her decisions thoroughly had waned. Or it could have been that he just looked so adorable, staring at her in disbelief the way that he was. Impulsively, with a playful grin, she leaned forward and lifted her hand to pinch him again.

This time Mamoru was quicker, and he twisted around to face her fully, capturing her wrist with his hand. His hold on her was gentle, and she probably could have pulled away if she wanted to, but when she tilted her head up and their eyes locked, the playful smile on her lips faded.

Her breath hitched, and her heart stuttered in her chest as something palpable shifted in between them. Mamoru must have felt it too because he visibly swallowed, and she released a shuddering breath. Their lips were barely inches apart, and there was something warm uncoiling in the pit of her stomach, sending tingles rippling over her body.

"Usako," he rasped, uncurling his fingers from around her wrist. "Can I kiss you?"

Internally, Usagi was jumping up and down, squealing with excitement because Mamoru wanted to kiss her. There was so much left unsaid between them, but at that moment, there was nothing she wanted more than to take Minako's advice and finally kiss him senseless.

She nodded, breath hitched with anticipation, reaching for him at the same time that his hands gripped her hips, pulling her closer. Usagi wrapped her arms around his neck, and the moment that his mouth collided with hers, she melted, eyelids fluttering shut as the tension receded from her body. She sighed blissfully against his lips that molded perfectly against hers.

He was tentative at first, lips lightly moving in the gentlest of caresses. It was like he was savoring the moment as he explored the curve of her lips, fingers bunching up the fabric of her shirt as they spanned the dip of her waist with a reverence that took her breath away.

It was soft, tender, and everything she'd ever imagined as she'd spent hours wondering what it would be like to have him touch her like this.

She would have been content to kiss him like this forever, lost in the warm comfort of his embrace. When she nipped at his mouth, though, teeth teasingly grazing the plump curl of his bottom lip, he groaned, curling trembling arms around her waist, pulling her against him with a gentleness that was so heart-achingly tender. As if this was all he'd ever wanted, too. As if he couldn't fathom ever letting her go.

The depth of everything she felt at that moment was overwhelming. Her breath caught on a harshly exhaled moan, and her pulse raced, body tingling as heat pooled in the pit of her stomach. She wanted to be closer, to feel everything.

Usagi took the initiative, sweeping her tongue along the seam of his lips, delving deeper, moving closer until she'd maneuvered herself to straddle his lap. Though this was far from her first kiss, she'd never felt anything quite like this before. She was dizzy, blissfully lost in the sensations elicited by the soft pressure of his palms as they swept beneath her shirt, pressing against the small of her back as he urged her closer.

He groaned into her mouth, and they were a flurry of hitched breathing and tangled tongues as she arched into him, desperate to be closer, to feel this way forever.

When they finally pulled apart, she was breathless, heady in the intimate aftermath of their kiss. Pressing her forehead against his, catching her breath, she couldn't help but wonder why everything about her and Mamoru felt so right? As if they'd been explicitly created to belong to each other.

Did he feel it too?

The invading thought was unwelcome, and it prodded at that tiny thread of insecurity that had appeared when he'd admitted that he was in love with Sailor Moon. She wanted to ignore it, and typically she was reckless enough to barrel forward without thinking about the consequences. Still, after kissing him like that, after everything, this was too important. He was too important, and if he didn't want her as Usagi...

It gutted her, and she inhaled sharply, painfully ripped from the warm, comforting daze of only moments before as she blinked back tears and pulled away slightly.

Mamoru must have sensed that something had changed between them because he tensed against her, brow furrowed as he studied her face.

She suddenly felt ridiculously self-conscious, and her stupid brain chose that moment to remind her that she was a hot mess. The crumpled shirt she wore probably dirty from spending the evening wrestling with a toddler and a baby. She didn't even want to think about the way she'd barely managed to tame the mess of her hair. And here she was, straddling his lap, every flaw on display, and for the first time, she sort of wished that she was covered in Sailor Moon's protective glamour.

Hadn't Tuxedo Mask always shown a preference for Sailor Moon rather than Mamoru for Usagi?

Usagi lowered her eyes, lashes fluttering, as she focused on the hollow of his collarbone instead of the confusion etched into his expression. It was silly to be jealous of herself. So stupid. Once the thought took root in her head she couldn't dismiss it, though. And really, in a world that was completely fake, crafted from her dreams, wasn't that feeling the only thing that was real?

Mamoru shifted his weight beneath her, sitting up, straightening his shoulders. "Usako," he rasped, and Usagi tilted her head up, gaze snapping back onto his face because there was fear and desperation laced into his tone. "I'm sorry, I didn't..." he trailed off, pressing his lips together, his expression so miserable that Usagi frowned, confused by his reaction. "Did I do something wrong?"

Usagi's breath hitched, heart twisted into knots. She didn't understand why Mamoru's first inclination was to blame himself because she'd pulled back. She'd always known that there was something that weighed on him heavily. It tugged on her heartstrings and elicited something so fiercely protective inside of her. If only…

She swallowed, cheeks flushed, blinking back tears. "Mamo-chan," she choked. "Why would you… of course you didn't do anything wrong. That was amazing… I think you're amazing...I just…" she stopped, throat constricted because why couldn't she just shut up?

She was in a dream world, and she was kissing Mamoru Chiba. Mamoru Chiba, the man she'd been in love with since high school, and she was ruining it. Who cares if he loved Sailor Moon more than her? Except that was clearly stupid, because she was Sailor Moon, and—

"Hey," he interrupted her downward spiral, frowning as he lifted his hands that had been loosely settled on her hips and gently framed her face instead. "What's going through your head right now, Usa?"

His eyes, filled with concern, searched her face, and though she tried, she really, really did, she couldn't help but note that his expression was so open now, vulnerable in a way that he would never have shared with her before he discovered that she was Sailor Moon.

She knew, deep down, that this wasn't entirely fair, but she couldn't help but feel hurt.

She swallowed, lower lip quivering when she bravely met his gaze. "I'm not Sailor Moon," she blurted without thinking. It's not what she meant, of course, and Mamoru's brows raised in surprise. She cringed at her inability to be coherent when her emotions were a jumbled mess. "I mean I am Sailor Moon, of course I am. It's just, I'm not only Sailor Moon. I'm Usagi too? And I like Usagi? I just… I want you to like Usagi, too."

Clearly, she'd stunned him, and he blinked, brow furrowing in confusion. "I…," he paused as if carefully considering his words. "I'm confused, Usako. Do you think I don't like… you?"

Usagi blushed, flinching, feeling so silly, but she'd come too far already to back down, and this was important. He had to know how important it was. "You said you loved Sailor Moon, Mamo-chan."

He nodded slowly, frown deepening, "You're Sailor Moon, Usako."

Usagi sighed, frustrated because this was coming out all wrong, and he wasn't getting what she was trying to say. "No, I know that. I'm trying, ugh, I just…" she stopped, took a deep breath, did her best to quell the tendency that she had to babble when she was nervous, and steadily met his eyes. "Look, this is important," she proclaimed, poking him in the chest. "Like really important. So, I just want to make sure that when you say you love me, it's not just because you found out I was Sailor Moon."

His eyes widened slightly, and he blinked, quietly scrutinizing her face in a way that made Usagi blush. "Usako," he began calmly, his expression unreadable. "I fell in love with Sailor Moon because everything about her is inherently beautiful. Her compassion, willingness to fight for others, and the way she always perseveres."

Mamoru paused, and Usagi's heart stopped, breath caught in her throat. Then he smirked that smirk, sweeping the pad of his thumb along her cheekbone to wipe away a tear she hadn't realized that she'd shed. "But, you are Sailor Moon, Usako, and I love you. I love the silly, bright-eyed girl who's always late, who trips over her own feet, a lot, but also makes sure that the broody baka at the counter in the arcade isn't always alone, even while she passionately defends the lives of orphaned children that she doesn't even know."

Usagi, stunned, couldn't find the words to adequately convey the warmth that blossomed in her chest or the way her heart soared when his words registered. Mamoru's smirk turned into a sheepish smile as he blushed.

He swallowed, clearing his throat as he lifted his hands away from her face. His fingertips grazed across her cheek for a moment, hovering, his expression almost mournful before he dropped them to her hips again. "I know that I'm not always good with words, but I do love you, and I'm not expecting anything in return, Usako. I swear I just—"

Usagi snorted, promptly interrupting him. "Stop," she snapped. "I'm totally head over heels in love with you, baka. I have been for like, ever. You can go ahead and not expect anything in return all that you want, but there's nothing you can do about it. So—"

She squealed when he pulled her against him, his lips crashing onto hers with a fervency that hadn't been there before. She was more than happy to reciprocate, sighing blissfully into his mouth as his lips moved beneath hers. She curled her arms around his neck as his hands slipped beneath her shirt again, tantalizingly trailing up her sides. His fingers fluttered across her skin in a way that made her tremble with anticipation as she arched closer, moaning against his lips.

Of course, she'd forgotten that she was trapped inside a fake world where they were parents to young children. She was promptly reminded of that, though, when Kousagi's wail pierced through her dulled senses. They pulled apart abruptly, gasping, just as Chibiusa called down the stairs.

"Mama, Papa? Can I have a glass of water?"

Usagi's expression crumpled with dismay, but Mamoru tenderly caressed the side of her face. "It's okay, Usako," he reassured. "We'll figure this out."

She grimaced, wrinkling her nose with disappointment, but nodded as she pushed away and flopped back on the couch with an exaggerated sigh.

Mamoru rolled his eyes, though he was smiling, and when he stood, he held out his hand to help her up.

His expression was reassuring, comforting, and for the first time since this whole Cardian mess, she felt like they were going to get out of this just fine. Of course, Kousagi's warning wail intensified into a shrill cry of distress, and both she and Mamoru winced as she accepted his hand and he hauled her to her feet.

Whatever happened, at least she knew that she wasn't in this alone.

oOo

He'd totally left her alone.

Chibiusa squealed, and it startled Kousagi into a high-pitched wail, only slightly muffled behind the door of the little kitchen pantry that she'd discovered almost right away. Usagi groaned, sliding down the door, in the dark, clutching a tiny kinoko no yama chocolate biscuit she'd found in a box with other assorted treats tucked away behind the rice.

Apparently, dream-Usagi had a propensity to squirrel away secret junk food, and she quietly saluted her in thanks now as she shoved the tiny mushroom-shaped cookie into her mouth.

Chibiusa called for her, and Usagi sighed, ready to admit that she hadn't been prepared for this. Not even a little bit, and she blinked back tears, sniffling dejectedly because she'd wanted to prove to herself that she was capable of taking care of two kids alone, no matter how temporary it was.

Grimacing, Usagi's shoulders slumped with a sigh of resignation because, okay, maybe this was just a tiny bit her fault?

After last night's steamy interlude, feeling like she could conquer the world, but still reeling with disbelief because holyfreakinghell, Mamoru Chiba had confessed that he was in love with her, she'd been so sure that she was going to wake up today to the smiling faces of the Senshi who'd just finishing slicing DreamWeaver into bits.

That, unfortunately, is not what happened. She'd woken up exhausted, tired from simultaneous knee and elbow japs administered by Chibiusa, who seemed to possess a tiny magical contortionist's flexibility. She'd crept into the bed that Usagi only tumbled into after Mamoru fell asleep beside Kousagi's crib, holding her hand because the drooling, hiccuping girl refused to settle without him.

This morning, they were in rough shape; tired children were, apparently, unbearably irrational— though really, Usagi couldn't fault them for that as she was feeling pretty damn irrational too. If she could have stomped her foot and thrown herself onto the floor in dramatic fashion because Mamoru gave her the green cup instead of the pink one, which is precisely what happened with Chibiusa, she probably would have.

Mamoru, at least, had the good sense to suggest that they alternate watching the kids so they could shower. At first, Usagi was hurt, the feeling pretty much instantaneous and totally coming from a place of sleep-deprivation and rampant emotions. Did he think less of her because she was still the hot disgusting mess that she'd been when they'd woken up yesterday? His shirt, decidedly way less cute a whole day later? Oh, God. He hated her now, and he had to—

Luckily, she had the good sense to curb her thoughts, stopping her downward spiral mid-twist as she glanced up at Mamoru to note that he, too, was not in much better shape than she was, and a shower and the chance to brush her teeth really would feel nice.

So, instead of bursting into tears because it was totally and completely unfair that he had to see her like this in the infancy of their relationship, no matter how unconventional it was, she smiled gratefully and nodded instead.

In all of his glorious perfection, Mamoru didn't even complain when her shower took at least 45 minutes longer than his, though it couldn't be helped with how long it took to brush the snarls out of her hair and tame it into her signature twin-bun hairstyle.

As she perused the closet, only half-listening to the girls giggling downstairs, she couldn't help but admire dream-Usagi's wardrobe. If this was a dream, it was definitely hers, and though the trendy part of her closet tempted her with sparkling gowns and heels galore, she opted for comfort with leggings and an off the shoulder sweater. Feeling proud to have made her first actual I'm-a-mom-for-now decision. (Though she was definitely going to sneak in here later to try everything on.)

She was only just coming down the stairs when she started, slipping a little on the steps as the chime of a doorbell echoed loudly from the genkan.

She stood, frozen in place, gaze fixed on the door in dismay. It was hard enough to be in this bubble with Mamoru. They were trying to navigate parenthood without any warning whatsoever, but that this dream had been crafted to include the other people in her life was overwhelming in a way that Usagi couldn't understand.

The bell chimed a second time, and this time Mamoru stepped over the threshold, Kousagi propped on his hip in a way that made her heart melt as his gaze met hers.

He frowned, expertly adjusting Kousagi in his arms to keep her from pulling at his hair—how the hell was he so good at this already?— as he flicked his gaze back onto the door.

"Who is it?"

Usagi shrugged, "I have no idea."

Mamoru's frown deepened, "We should probably answer it, Usako."

Usagi thought about it for a second, slowly stepping down, before shaking her head. "Ummm, no," she replied. "I vote that we don't."

Mamoru rolled his eyes. "Well, I'm going to answer it."

Usagi gasped, scrambling down the stairs in the most ungraceful way possible, skidding in front of him just as he moved to twist the handle. He blinked, pulling back, startled as she pressed her back against the door, arms splayed wide across it to stop him.

"Mamo-chan," she hissed under her breath, maybe a little more dramatically than intended. "What if it's a monster, or like, a Cardian within a Cardian? I can't transform, and neither can you."

He straightened, tilting his head to the side, hair falling all sexily into his eyes as he raised a brow. "Usako," he scolded, "you don't really believe that."

He was right. She didn't. But was it too much to ask that they only handle one thing at a time? And who actually knew who was waiting for them beyond the doorway? Maybe it was a monster. This dream could transform into a nightmare with the drop of a hat, and there was nothing they could do about it.

Mamoru sighed as the bell rang again, and he leaned over slightly, peering out of the frosted glass window that lined the door.

Kousagi giggled, babbling incoherently as she pulled at Mamoru's collar. He didn't even look away from the window, lifting his hand for Kousagi to grab onto instead as his brow furrowed.

"It's a girl with blue hair."

Usagi straightened, eyes widening. Girl with blue hair? Definitely Ami.

Usagi sighed, relieved, though also nervous to see what this world had done to her friend. "Okay, well," Usagi began, pushing away from the door. "I guess we can answer it. It's definitely Ami-chan."

Mamoru glanced over at her, brow raised in question. "Ami-chan?"

Usagi nodded, biting her lower lip. There was so much that she needed to tell him. After all of this was over, they needed to sit down and talk about what was waiting for them in real life. The search for the princess, the Senshi. He was obviously going to be coming to Senshi meetings now, so he had to know everything—

"Usako," he sighed that long-suffering sigh of exasperation. "You're getting stuck in your head again. Ami-chan?"

Usagi blinked, startled that he'd realized what she was thinking, and she blushed, twirling around to answer the door.

"Ami-chan is Sailor Mercury. She's super smart, maybe even smarter than you, Mamo-chan. Don't worry; you're gonna love her."

His eyes widened, alarmed, "Wait, Usako—"

She didn't give him the chance to finish before she twisted the door handle and pulled it open wide enough that both she and Mamoru were visible in the entrance.

Ami, poised in the doorway, looked super adorable. She was a little older, her hair a teeny bit longer, with the cutest glasses perched on the bridge of her nose. Usagi couldn't help but feel giddy with excitement.

"Ami-chan!" she exclaimed happily, momentarily forgetting that this was dream-Ami and not real-life Ami. "Hi! How are you?"

Ami blinked, her furrowed brow smoothing out instantly, stiff posture relaxing, eyes brightening as she fixed them onto Usagi's smiling face. She laughed, shaking her head with an indulgent smile.

"I'm wonderful, Usagi-chan," she replied warmly. "How was your anniversary weekend?"

The question reminded Usagi that she was not in the real world, and she straightened, suppressing a grimace, laughing uncomfortably instead. "Umm, good! We did all the things, had all the fun; I wore Mamo-chan's shirt."

She heard a strangled gasp, and she was a hundred percent sure that if she turned around, Mamoru's face would be tinged red with embarrassment. Her smile only widened, and she took a step back, waving Ami in.

"Come in, Ami-chan!"

Dream-Ami must have been used to dream-Usagi's antics because the blunette simply chuckled as she stepped over the threshold, and her eyes slid onto Mamoru and Kousagi.

"Hello, little one," Ami greeted warmly, leaning forward to tickle Kousagi's toes. Her eyes slid up to Mamoru's face, and he smiled politely, if not nervously, in response to her smile. "Are you ready to go, Mamoru-san?"

Usagi's heart skipped, and she cringed because clearly dream-Mamo-chan was supposed to do something with dream-Ami, and they had no way of knowing what that was. If Ami had asked Usagi the question, she would have messed it all up, babbled crazily, and ended up worrying everyone instead.

Luckily, Mamoru was a pro at hiding his emotions and even better at being super vague with his words. "I'm so sorry, I meant to call you," he lied so smoothly, Usagi frowned. "It's been a little hectic here this morning, and I'm not sure I can go."

Ami's eyes widened sympathetically, and she glanced between Mamoru and Usagi with concern. "Oh, no. Are the kids okay? You should probably call Ito-Sensai to let him know you won't make it. Weren't you observing surgery today?"

The only thing that gave away Mamoru's surprise was how his brow creased ever so slightly, and the way he straightened, tensing his shoulders. Usagi frowned because, though she couldn't say for sure, it seemed like Mamoru had gone the doctor route in this dream world too. Apparently, so had Ami, which made complete sense.

Usagi, just because she was impulsive and if dream-Ami was anything like real-life Ami, she would totally forgive a little bit of crazy, answered before Mamoru could. "Right, so Mamo-chan is watching a surgery cause you're both totally doctors in a hospital and all that?"

Ami started, blinking in surprise before turning back towards Usagi. "Um, well, not quite yet, Usagi-chan," she laughed. "Are you not feeling well?"

Usagi shook her head, "Sorry, Ami-chan," she apologized. "I'm just a frazzled mess with Kousagi teething and Chibiusa and all of that. I totally knew that you guys were not doctors yet and that Mamo-chan was going to do the thing at the hospital you work at, which is totally called... Um…"

Ami frowned, stepping towards her genuinely worried now. "Keio hospital, Usagi-chan," she replied, lifting her hand to press it against her forehead. "Are you sick?"

"She's alright, Ami-san," Mamoru interjected, and Usagi didn't miss the look of exasperation he shot her from behind Ami's back. "It's me, I'm a little out of sorts, and so I won't be able to—"

"He'll be ready in like, five minutes."

Mamoru's eyes widened, and Ami glanced between them, brow furrowing in confusion.

"Usako, I don't think—"

"It's okay, Mamo-chan," she interrupted with a dismissive wave. "I'm actually totally fine, and you look like you're okay too. I think you should go."

She wasn't sure what she'd been thinking at that moment. She just knew that she wanted to prove to herself that she could manage this. That Usagi Tsukino, who planned to go to school to be a social worker for disadvantaged children, could handle two kids that were supposed to be hers, all alone. Plus, who knew how long they were going to be stuck here? They needed to at least play the part while they figured out a way to escape.

Ami cleared her throat, blushing uncomfortably. "Um, I'm just going to step outside really quickly to call Ryo. He'll be home tonight," she said softly, her expression taking on a lovestruck edge that surprised Usagi. "I'll be right back, Mamoru-san, and you can let me know if you're coming in today."

The moment Ami stepped out of the house, Mamoru scowled. "Usako, what are you thinking?" he practically growled, which distracted Usagi for a second cause she liked when he grumbled. "I'm not leaving you here alone."

Usagi tsked, waving in what hoped was a flippant, confident way as she skipped forward and held her hands out for Kousagi. "I've got this, Mamo-chan," she reassured, and at that moment, she truly believed it. "Look, this is sort of our life right now, and maybe you can figure out how to get us out of here."

He froze, lips parted on a sharp intake of breath for a moment before he exhaled slowly. Pressing his lips together with a resigned nod. "Fine," he sighed, deflated, gaze averted as he handed her Kousagi, who whimpered, distressed as she reached out for Mamoru. "I just don't want to leave you, Usako."

Usagi's expression fell, crestfallen, as she wrestled a squirming Kousagi in her grasp. "You don't think I can handle it?"

He frowned shaking his head, "No, it's not that—"

"Because I can do this, Mamo-chan," she snapped, hurt constricting her throat a bit. "I know I sort of fell apart yesterday, but, come on, I can't be expected to be all calm and collected and okay with everything. I mean, I know that you are, but you're like, an anomaly, Mamo-chan. Regular people don't just—"

"Usako!" he snapped, interrupting her tirade. "It's not that!"

Usagi blinked, pressing her lips together, cheeks flushing as she attempted to adjust Kousagi, who was practically trying to leap from her arms to Mamoru. Seriously, why was this kid determined to prove her wrong?

"Well, then what is the problem, Mamo-chan?"

Mamoru sighed, raking his fingers through his hair. "I want to stay here with you and the girls, Usako," he murmured. "It's not because I don't think you can't handle it. I've seen you in action; I know you can handle anything."

Usagi was at a loss for words, stunned, her heart fluttering in her chest, and she swallowed around the lump of emotion in her throat. "Well, okay then," she whispered, blinking back grateful tears. "We'll be here when you get back. Just trust me, okay?"

Mamoru's expression softened in a way that she could become very accustomed to, and he sighed, stepped towards them, and pulled them into his arms, much to a squealing Kousagi's delight.

"If you think you're going to be okay, I trust you, Usa," he replied softly, bending down to brush a kiss across her forehead. "I'll go and see if… if there's anything out of place."

Usagi nodded, feeling overwhelmed with emotion. "Okay," she whispered, snuggling closer, arms tightening around Kousagi for a moment longer before taking a deep breath, steeling her determination as she pulled away. "Also, now that I know how well you can hide your emotions and lie,I'm going to see right through you every time, Mamo-chan!" she teased. "So don't try and break up with me or anything, cause I won't believe you!"

Mamoru rolled his eyes, though he was smirking again, and she was feeling totally invincible. One hundred percent ready to take on this day. Of course, at that moment, there was a loud smash that echoed from the kitchen.

It was followed by a tentative, "Oops! Mama? Papa?"

Mamoru cursed under his breath, and Usagi cringed because hadn't they learned their lesson when they'd left Chibiusa alone yesterday?

Still, she'd been sure that she could handle it even though they'd found the kitchen upside down (how long had they been gone?!), and Mamoru had given her a mournful, reluctant look when she'd pushed him out the door to follow after Ami.

She'd been so sure. So sure. Except now, almost five exhausting hours later, she'd left Chibiusa alone once again, Kousagi safely tucked away in the playpen, to retreat into the darkened pantry, near tears, because she was an epic failure.

If she couldn't handle two little girls and keep a house clean, how would she do anything? How was she going to become a social worker? Would Mamo-chan… I mean, surely it was too early to think about a family and that kind of thing, but would he even want to? When he came home to find the total and utter mess that she'd made?

Usagi whimpered, miserably wiping tears from her cheeks just as Chibiusa's little fingers peeped under the pantry door. "Mama, are you in there?"

Usagi sighed and took a deep breath before propelling herself onto her knees, twisting around, leaning up to open the door. A sliver of light pierced through the darkness, and Chibiusa popped her head through the opening, eyes wide and bright, a smile of delight, cute dimples and all, spread across her face.

"What are you doing, Mama?" she chimed, her voice like the tinkling of bells. "Are you hiding?"

Despite herself, Usagi smiled. "I totally am," she whispered conspiratorially, her tone hushed and playful. "But only because I heard that there were some teeny, tiny elves that were trying to steal my cookies. Do you want some?"

Chibiusa's eyes lit up, gasping with excitement. "You found papa's secret cookies?"

Usagi was surprised to hear that the secret junk food belonged to Mamoru, but she giggled, holding her arms out for Chibiusa, who promptly fell into her lap.

"What do you mean, Papa's secret cookies?"

Chibiusa grinned sheepishly. "You always say we can only eat food that won't hurt our teeth, but I askedid papa with tears, so he lets me have some sometimes." Chibiusa's eyes widened, and she gasped, horrified by what she'd just confessed. "But it's a secret, Mama. Don't tell!"

Usagi choked on a bark of laughter, pulling the box from behind her and handed a biscuit to Chibiusa, who squealed in delight as she stuffed it into her mouth. "I won't say a word, I promise."

Chibiusa smiled a grateful, chocolatey smile, and Usagi stood, pulling the little girl to her feet. "Well, let's see if your sister is awake and ready to eat something, shall we?"

She'd never been more grateful for Mamoru's obsession with organization and lists than when she'd read through the ones he'd compiled the night before. It was the only reason that she knew that she had to mashup Kousagi's food before she ate it, though luckily, dream Usagi and Mamoru had some premade stuff ready to go.

Chibiusa laughed, nodding, "Oh, yeah. She's awake, Mama, and you will need to put her in the bath again."

Usagi froze, eyes widening in alarm. "What?" she gasped. "Why?!"

Chibiusa shrugged, skipping from the pantry. "Cause she made a huge stinky mess again."

Usagi could have cried. She was going to have to look over Mamoru's list again to make sure she wasn't missing something about diapers.

oOo

It was hours later, the house in worse shape than it had been the night before, the dinner she'd attempted to make a burnt, sloppy mess. Chibiusa was whining, appalled because she was hungry, but, according to her, she was never ever, ever going to eat the yucky half-burnt food that Usagi had provided. Kousagi wasn't any better, busily throwing the mashed up concoction of vegetables that Usagi was trying to feed her right back in her face.

Usagi was near tears once again, feeling more exhausted than any of the times that she'd fought, Youma, Beryl, and Cardian combined, when the front door opened and closed.

She tried to put on a brave face when Mamoru walked into the kitchen, she really, really did, but all she could imagine was what he saw right now. The house, the kitchen, the state of the girls, and her. And she started out with a smile, prepared to say something flippant that would give the impression that she was entirely in control despite the state of everything.

Of course, the moment their eyes met and his expression was all soft and doting like it had been when he'd pulled her and Kousagi into his arms this morning, she suddenly couldn't even fathom holding it together and instead of saying 'Hi, Mamo-chan! How was your day?' it sounded more like a blubbering mishmash of whimpers because she promptly burst into tears.

Instantly, he pulled her into his arms, and she sagged against him, sobbing into his shirt, unable to help herself.

"Usako, hey," he prodded softly, smoothing back her hair in the sweetest, gentlest way possible, and it only made her cry harder. "What happened?"

The question was so absurd, she let out a dry, almost hysterical bark of laughter through her tears.

"What do you mean, what happened?" she choked, sniffling, pulling away to peer up into his face. "Didn't you see the house?"

Mamoru tilted his head to the side, studying her face, clearly perplexed. "Yes, I did have to walk through the living room to get here," he teased, the corner of his lips quirking up ever so slightly.

His reaction was freaking annoying because why didn't he understand, and she sobbed again. "Mamo-chan!" she wailed and, God help her, but she actually stomped her foot. "I'm serious, did you see the girls? Did you see me?"

Mamoru chuckled, literally chuckled, and Usagi gasped indignantly, contemplating hitting him because couldn't he see how bad she was at this? But then, he cupped her chin and tilted her face up, and her breath caught in her throat. She sniffled as he tenderly swiped away tears—probably some baby food, too—off her cheek with the pad of his thumb.

"Yeah, Usako," he replied smirking. "I can see you, too."

She whimpered, feeling miserable. Things were just so much easier when she was only failing at getting to the Crown for work on time. "I'm sorry, Mamo-chan," she rasped. "I'm so bad at this."

Before Mamoru could respond, Chibiusa tugged on Mamoru's shirt, breaking them apart and drawing their attention.

"Hi, Papa!" she chimed brightly, smiling, her face covered in chocolate, one odango askew. "Do you know what we did today? We played all day, Papa. We played in the bathtub and with my dolls, and then Mama made the stove smoke, so we played outside. Then we played hide a go seeking in the dark, and Mama gives the best hugs. It was the best day ever, and Kousagi thinks so too cause I learnedid how to speak baby, and she told me so."

Usagi blinked, wiping away the tears from her cheeks, stunned into silence. Kousagi squealed from her high chair, reaching out with carrot covered fingers. Mamoru moved toward her, and Usagi's eyes welled with tears again when Kousagi's tiny nose wrinkled, and she shook her head.

"Ma! Ma!"

Mamoru laughed, actually laughed, not just a chuckle or a snort. He genuinely laughed, and Usagi started, eyes wide with shock when they met his, and she realized that she'd never actually heard him laugh before.

"I don't think there's anything you're bad at, Usako," he said warmly. "It sounds to me like you exceeded all expectations, just like I knew you would."

Usagi swallowed, heart brimming with love, and at that moment, she knew that even if they never got out of here, they were going to be just fine.

oOo

Usagi was an expert at tip-toeing now. All of her life, except for those rare times, when she channeled all of the grace of a Senshi in those do-or-die moments, she'd pretty much been like a bull in a china shop. This changed very quickly when your ability to quietly exit a dark room is what determined whether you were going to have the rest of your evening to read manga or make out with your super sexy husband or if you were going to spend it coaxing a grumpy-faced, overtired baby back to sleep.

Luckily, Chibiusa had stopped fighting sleep weeks ago. She was already fast asleep in the big girl bed that she'd transitioned to when Minako had returned from her tour and gifted her the most ostentatious princess bed that she'd ordered specially made from Italy.

Still, Usagi peeked in on her, hovering over the threshold, pleased to see that she was fast asleep. Her little-cherub cheeks illuminated in the soft glow of a pink Ikea flower light that Mamo-chan had installed when she'd insisted that monsters lived under her bed, and she was going to have to sleep with them forever.

Usagi partially closed the door with a sigh, her heart skipping a beat as she stepped back into the hallway.

Sometimes it was easy to forget that they'd been here for months. In the beginning, she'd urged Mamoru to research the web, look through medical journals, even study the stupid stars for answers because how did you escape a dream world created by a Cardian?

She wasn't sure, exactly, when she'd stopped asking Mamoru if he'd found anything new when he came home from long days working in a job he so clearly loved, and it was only then that she realized that he never brought it up, either.

Still, once in a while, she was afraid because she didn't know how long they had, and though the life outside of this one—their real-life— seemed distant now, she knew deep down that they'd have to find a way to get back to it.

Usagi swallowed, blinking back unbidden tears that welled in the corner of her eyes because she'd never counted on falling head over heels in love with her pretend children, too.

With a sigh that felt as heavy as the weight that was steadily growing bigger on her heart, she flicked the hallway light off and slipped into her bedroom, quietly closing the door behind her with a small, practically inaudible click.

"Did she wake up?"

Usagi swiveled around, some of the tension easing from her shoulders, turning towards Mamoru, who looked incredibly kissable in their bed, wearing just a KU t-shirt and his boxers, reading glasses perched on the tip of his nose with an ancient astronomy book open in his lap. This one didn't even have a cover, some older manuscript that Hiroshi had found in a thrift shop as he also shared a love for astronomy like Mamoru.

Despite her previous thoughts, Usagi smiled, pulling off her grown-up silk robe, tossing it onto the floor, much to Mamoru's dismay, before falling onto the bed with a loud, exaggerated sigh.

"Yep, out like a light. Both of them," she replied proudly. "Thank God it's an early bedtime too because we have that party at Mako-chan's tomorrow, and I don't want them to be cranky."

Mamoru frowned, putting his book and glasses aside, twisting onto his side, to look down at her. "What party?" he drawled, eyebrows raised. "I remember nothing about a party."

Usagi rolled her eyes, "Yes, you do, Mamo-chan," she grumbled, exasperated. "It's Minako's going away party, because she'll be touring Europe for the next three months." Mamoru rolled his eyes this time, and Usagi scowled, poking him in the chest. "Stop that! Why do you guys pretend you don't like each other? You know the more you fight it, the more she's gonna try her hardest to embarrass you. You can't get all shell shocked every time she mentions sex, Mamo-chan."

Mamoru sighed, brows furrowed, "Okay, but, Usako," he replied plaintively. "Do you have to tell her everything?"

Usagi giggled, thoroughly amused at the appalled look on his face. "Yes, absolutely," she quipped brightly, without regret. "Besides if it weren't for Minako, there's no way I would have ever known how to do that thing with—"

She squealed when he swept down, nipping playfully at her lips, fluttering his fingers along her sides in a way that he knew was ticklish. She gasped, squirming beneath him, choking on bouts of laughter even as she pushed at his shoulders.

"Stop!" she laughed, "I surrender! I surrender!"

He stopped, lifting his head, smiling down at her, propping up on his elbow as he gently caressed the side of her face, and tucked a stray curl behind her ear.

It was like this all the time, and Usagi wished that she didn't have to break the sweet, tender intimacy of this moment that she knew would have escalated into something else if she'd only leaned up and kissed him like she typically would have. Her heart was heavy today, though, and, unlike usual, she was having a difficult time pushing her worries aside.

Her smile faded, and she knew the moment that Mamoru felt the shift in her demeanor, because he frowned.

"Mamo-chan," she whispered tentatively. "Have you dreamt of her since we've been here?"

When Mamoru had told her months ago that he'd been searching for the princess because she haunted his dreams, pleading for the very same crystal that the Senshi had been looking for, for some reason, it had bothered her. So she'd never brought it up again. But it suddenly felt important, and though it broke her heart, she knew they couldn't stay here.

Mamoru inhaled sharply, that guarded, unreadable mask that she hadn't seen in weeks falling into place. It had been a signature staple of his go-to expressions before, but now it was strange to see it after so long, and she realized she'd been spoiled with nothing but the carefree, open looks he graced her and the girls with.

He pulled away, sat up, and cleared his throat. "No," he replied quietly. "I haven't had a dream about her since we woke up here, Usako."

Usagi exhaled slowly, feeling nervous as she propped herself up on her elbows. "Mamo-chan," she began, her tone regretful. "How long do you think it will be before the Cardian is done with us?"

She hated the way he tensed, expression hardening as he raked his fingers through his hair. "I don't know," he snapped, though his expression softened as if he'd realized how terse he'd sounded. "It's a dream, Usako. So, I guess, technically, we could potentially live out an entire lifetime here before it ends."

Usagi's eyes widened, and she bolted upright with a gasp. "We can't live a lifetime here, Mamo-chan," she rasped, heart tangled in knots because she knew how hard this was. She loved this place. It was her dream, after all, but she couldn't abandon the Senshi to the Cardians. They still needed to find the Princess and the Crystal. They needed to go back. "We need to go back. You know that, right, Mamo-chan?"

He didn't say anything for a long moment, and the tension between them was practically unbearable when he finally nodded, barely sparing her a glance.

"Yes," he rasped. "I know." He cleared his throat, stiffly turning towards his side table to flick off the lamp. When the room was bathed in darkness, he turned away from her, settling on the edge of the bed. "We should probably get some sleep. Minako's party is early, and the girls will be up even earlier."

Usagi sat there, tears in her eyes, gaze fixed onto his outline in the dark. Her first inclination was to turn away from him angrily, settle into her pillow and forget she'd even brought it up. Instead, she sighed, understanding that Mamo-chan's heart was aching just as painfully as hers was. Carefully slipping under the blanket, she moved closer until her chest was flush against his back, curled her arm around his waist and buried her face between his shoulder blades.

"Mamo-chan," she whispered, though her voice seemed to echo loudly in the room's dark silence. "No matter what happens, I love you. I love you so much."

She felt the way the tension eased from his shoulders, and she wasn't surprised when he shifted, twisting around in her embrace, wordlessly curling his arms around her with a desperation that broke her heart. He hauled her against his chest, firm, tapered fingers weaving through her hair as he tenderly tucked her head beneath his chin.

"I love you, too, Usako," he whispered so quietly she almost didn't hear him. "I've only ever wanted to belong to you."

oOo

Makoto-chan lived in a small house near the bakery that she co-owned with her husband, Hiroshi-san. It was cozy, cute, with state of the art kitchen appliances, but, admittedly, the backyard was small, and at the moment, it was jam-packed with all of their closest friends. Including some of Minako's label acquaintances that insisted they go everywhere with her.

Her charismatic friend was in her element, and she absolutely loved the attention showered on her as a young, incredibly talented pop-idol. She was like a trendy ray of sunshine, flitting from one group of people to the next. Usagi watched her, amused, and couldn't help but note that everyone, including herself, seemed to be precisely where they wanted to be.

Deep down, she knew that this was what DreamWeaver wanted. The Cardian's only goal was more than likely to keep her appeased, unwilling to wake up from the world it had crafted from her deepest desires before it ultimately gathered their last vestiges of energy and brought it back to whoever it served.

Glancing sideways at Mamoru, she pushed the daunting thoughts aside, determined not to dwell on them, at least for today, just as Mako-chan, smiling brightly, sporting the cutest little green dress, swept forward to greet them.

"Hi, Tsukino family!" she exclaimed brightly, her demeanor exuberant, positively glowing with happiness. "You guys are here so early! Usagi-chan, I'm honestly and genuinely shocked."

Usagi rolled her eyes because even here, her punctuality was a running joke among her friends.

Mamoru chuckled. "Minako lied to her and told her the party started an hour ago."

This was entirely true, and Usagi was going to retort with something thoroughly witty when Chibiusa chose that moment to tear her little hand out of hers, squealing in delight as she launched herself into Makoto's arms.

"Obachan! Guess what! Guess what!" she exclaimed, giggling brightly. "I losted my first tooth! See?"

As Makoto eagerly inspected Chibiusa's mouth that she held wide open, little fingers pointing at the gap in her teeth, Ami, and quiet, always blushing Ryo, joined them, pulling Mamoru into a conversation about work. At the same time, he effortlessly cradled a sleeping Kousagi in a baby sling that he'd spent an hour watching tutorial videos on how to use correctly.

Usagi followed that conversation for about a whole five minutes—which was, in her opinion, no small feat— before she took a step back, eyes falling onto the cloth-covered table pressed against the white picket fence at the back of the yard, platters of Makoto's famous sweets beautifully displayed on every inch of it.

With an internal squeal of delight, Usagi decided to take that moment to herself to not-so-secretly gorge on the delectable delights, but, because she was an adult, she politely excused herself.

Mamoru knew precisely what she was going to do, though, because he cast a quick, amused glance her way, smirking in that way that he knew made her heart skip a beat. She resisted the urge to stick her tongue at him before dashing around a couple that must have been Minako's friends because she didn't recognize them.

She'd just reached her destination, mouth-watering at the savory smells wafting from the table when she was promptly interrupted by the sound of a soft, slightly condescending chuckle she recognized very well.

"Always with the food for you, Odango Atama."

Usagi gasped, swiveling around with excitement, her hair whipping across her face with the movement. "Rei-chan!" She squealed. "You're here! I didn't think you could come!"

Rei smirked, shrugging, crossing her arms as purple irises swept across the crowd. They fell onto Minako, who, as if she could sense the former Shinto Priestess's stare, glanced up from her conversation with a willowy, stern-faced man that must have been apart of her labels team. Minako's face lit up, eyes softening before she winked, blowing Rei a kiss.

Rei blushed, rolling her eyes in that exasperated, what-am-I-going-to-do-with-you way that closely resembled the look that Mamoru expertly used on Usagi too, and she giggled, delighted, as Rei turned back towards her.

"Yes, well, managing Minako sometimes has its perks. One of them being that I get to choose which parties I attend," she replied, expression uncharacteristically softening. "I knew that I had to say goodbye before we left for Europe."

Usagi nodded slowly, smiling, though it didn't quite reach her eyes because she couldn't shake the foreboding feeling that she'd been trying to chase away for days. That lingering, gnawing feeling that niggled and pushed her not to forget, though she really, really wanted to. She didn't belong here, and she knew, without a doubt, that she wouldn't be here when the dream versions of her friends returned from Europe. The painful realization overwhelmed her in a way that she wasn't entirely able to hide.

Rei frowned, uncannily perceptive as her gaze swept over her. "Hey, Usagi-chan," she prodded softly, scrutinizing her face. "Are you feeling okay?"

Usagi shrugged, forcing her lips to curl up into a watery smile, though she feared that it looked more like an awkward grimace than anything. "I'm fine," she reassured weakly with a dismissive wave. "Just, you know, regular stress with the girls and all of that."

Rei's frown deepened, clearly concerned as she took a tentative step closer. "Stress isn't something to dismiss so easily, Usagi," she admonished, eyes shrewdly sweeping over her face. "When I was a Miko, meditation was commonly taught and effectively used to mitigate that sort of thing." Leaning forward, Rei took her hands in hers, expression earnest as she met her gaze. "Do you want to try? It might help."

Usagi opened her mouth to protest, but Rei was already closing her eyes, squeezing her fingers in a way that left no room for argument. Usagi sighed, shrugging, because what was the harm in practicing a little bit of meditation? So, she nodded, ignoring the fact that they were standing on the edges of a crowded garden party, and closed her eyes.

"Okay, Usagi-chan," Rei began, her voice barely audible over the crowd's din. "Take a deep breath. In, then out."

Usagi felt a little ridiculous actually, but she did as she was instructed, breathing deeply. Inhaling and exhaling slowly.

"Clear your mind," she ordered, and Usagi resisted the urge to roll her eyes. "Usagi, trust me!" Rei snapped, clearly sensing her hesitation. "There's nothing but your breathing and the sound of my voice."

"Okay, okay," Usagi grumbled under her breath, inwardly hoping that nobody was staring at them as she continued to breathe in and out.

"Good, Usagi," Rei murmured softly. "Keep going. Focus on just breathing. Imagine inhaling everything that's been weighing on your mind like they're particles of energy, cycling it, and exhaling it back out."

Usagi's brow creased because actually, it was sort of helping. Was the sound of the crowd around her fading a little bit? She continued to breathe, in and out, digging deeper, as Rei calmly continued to instruct her on what she should concentrate on next.

She felt like they'd been at this for a while, all of the tension easing from her limbs, her lips going numb until, strangely, there was no sound at all. Even Rei's voice had faded to a dull, distant echo before disappearing entirely.

Usagi probably should have been alarmed, but she was so relaxed, stuck in a strange daze-like haze, that she didn't even question the fact that she could no longer feel her hands in Rei's. Or the slight breeze that had swept through Makoto's backyard. Or the smell of Makoto's food that had been so enticing only moments ago. She felt kind of weightless like she was floating through a void of nothing, completely bathed in silence and darkness.

It felt kind of good, actually, so Usagi kept breathing, kept concentrating, kept pushing until the tiniest pinprick of light pierced through the darkness, and she squinted, recoiling backward as it blinded her.

Something was wrong, and that calm, serene state that she'd been lulled into by Rei's voice was receding quickly, replaced with confusion and fear. She tried to move away from it, flailing her limbs in panic when the tiny ball of light suddenly, and quite terrifyingly, widened, tearing open at an alarming rate before swallowing her whole.

Her eyes flew open, inhaling sharply on a startled, jarring breath, she wasn't at the party with Rei-chan holding her hands anymore. It took what seemed like several moments before her eyesight adjusted, the feeling coursing through her arms and legs tingling painfully when she realized that she could barely move.

She was constricted tightly, her body pressed against what she strongly suspected was Mamoru's, as a thin, skin-like sheathe coiled, vibrating around her body. It was difficult to move her head, but what she could see terrified her because crawling all over her was small, vibrating red thorns that pierced her skin, glowing neon red in the pod's darkness.

Usagi opened her mouth, her throat hoarse, dry like she'd swallowed a bucket full of sand. "Help!" she croaked, the effort it took to rasp out that single word sapping her energy. "Please!"

"Usagi! We hear you! We're coming!"

She wasn't sure who called out from the muffled confines of her prison, but she whimpered, too tired to struggle, too tired to curl into Mamoru pressed against her.

"Mars, fire, ignite!"

It was clearly Sailor Mars who screamed, her elemental attack conjuring the heat of a flame that enveloped the Cardian's pod for only a moment, before the creature, DreamWeaver, dodged it, cackling loudly as it pulled away.

Usagi wasn't claustrophobic, but she was terrified, draped in the pulsing thorns and skin-like material, and she couldn't handle it. Mustering every last bit of strength she possessed, Usagi screamed, the blood-curdling wail rippling through the pod around her. In retrospect, screaming was stupid, and it must have alerted the Cardian because her mouth instantly filled with fluid as she slammed her eyes closed, choking, drowning. In her terror, she willed herself back to sleep, away from the jarring horror of whatever the hell was happening out here.

The moment that she did, she tumbled back into the darkness, through the portal of light. Though she was flickering through whatever tunnel Rei's meditation had conjured when she gasped, inhaling on a strangled scream as her eyes flew open again, and she was back at Minako's party. She blinked, and she was in the pod, she blinked again, and she was standing in the garden, still trapped in the silence when she realized that everyone at Minako's party had turned to stare at her with stunned expressions.

She didn't understand why, because she still couldn't hear a thing, but all she knew was that something was really, very wrong.

She was jolted into the dream world with more stability when Rei grasped her shoulders, fingers pressing into her skin as she violently shook her. The former priestess's lips were moving, but Usagi couldn't make out what she was saying.

It was only when Mamoru appeared in front of her, eyes wide with terror, cradling her face in his hands, that the horrifying silence disappeared with a painful pop and her heart jumped into her throat, and the silence was replaced with a heart-wrenching scream of terror. It took a moment before it registered that the scream was her own, and she sucked in a breath, snapping her lips shut. Her ears were ringing in the aftermath of everything that had just occurred.

She was dizzy suddenly like she'd just been at the very top of a roller coaster ride, and the cart had just dropped.

"Usako!" Mamoru cried hoarsely. "What is it? What the hell happened?"

She opened her mouth to tell him, to explain what it was that she'd seen, but the blood drained from her face and it felt like all of the energy had been siphoned from her limbs. She wouldn't have been able to stay standing upright even if she wanted to, and her eyes rolled into the back of her head, and she tumbled into the dark, dreamless void of her dream world.

oOo

Usagi groaned as she steadily moved towards consciousness. She became acutely aware that her whole body felt heavy, sore like she'd spent months running a marathon, dodging obstacles without a break in pace.

Something warm pressed against her forehead, a soft caress on the curve of her cheek pulling away the last remnants of sleep, and her eyes flew open, lashes fluttering, vision momentarily blurred before they adjusted, and she was peering up into the concerned, beautiful perfection of Mamoru's eyes.

His expression crumpled with relief, and his hands trembled as they framed her face. "Damn, Usako," he choked, his tone hoarse with emotion. "I can't tell you how relieved I am to see you open your eyes. What the hell happened?"

Usagi blinked, still feeling disoriented as she slowly craned her neck to the side, bewildered because she wasn't lying on the grass in dream-Makoto's garden. She was tucked under the blankets in their dreamworld bedroom. Her heart skipped a beat, realizing that she was mentally prefacing everything in her head with 'dream' because, for a while, she'd allowed herself to forget.

It was such a painful realization, and it ripped through her with such heart-aching, piercing accuracy that she gasped, tears welling in her eyes, blurring her vision again. She tried to blink them back. Instead, they spilled, slipping listlessly down her cheeks.

"Usako," Mamoru rasped as he curled one arm around her waist, the other one pressed between her shoulder blades as he gently pulled her upright, tugging her into his lap. "Tell me what happened. Please, Usa."

Usagi whimpered, curling up against him, tucking her knees beneath her chin, her head cradled in the crook of his collarbone. "I—" she whispered, trembling, pausing only because it occurred to her that she'd gone from Makoto's to here, and she needed to know where the girls were because they had to leave them. It was time to go home. "Kousagi and Chibiusa, Mamo-chan? Where are they?"

Mamoru inhaled sharply, his grip tightening around her as if he were afraid to let her go. "They're with Mako-chan, Usako," he replied quietly. "You were screaming. You wouldn't stop, and it was like you couldn't see me, Usa, and then you just fell into my arms. I had to— I couldn't bring the girls home with us until I knew if—God, Usa. I just thought—"

Usagi's breath hitched, and her lower lip trembled because she knew exactly what Mamoru had assumed, and he was partially right. Mustering her energy, she pulled away, shifting her body and twisting her torso until she was straddling his lap instead of draped across it.

Her hands trembled as she lifted them to frame his face. "Mamo-chan," she began, her tone quivering with emotion. "I saw it. I woke up."

Mamoru blinked, cobalt blue eyes filled with confusion, and she watched, her heart breaking, as what she'd said slowly registered. He hissed through his teeth on a shocked inhale of breath. "What do you mean you woke up?"

Usagi swallowed, lower lip trembling because, God, he sounded as devastated as she felt. "Rei-chan was showing me how to meditate, then I opened my eyes, and I was trapped beside you. In the Cardian's pod, Mamo-chan."

It had been a hell of a lot more jarring than her simple explanation, but she decided to spare Mamoru the horrific details, instinctively knowing that the news that she'd figured out how to wake up would be devastating enough.

He didn't say anything for a long, tension-filled moment, and Usagi's heart dropped when his expression became shuttered, guarded in that way that indicated he was pulling away from her.

"Okay, Usako," he replied, taking a deep breath before calmly lifting his hand to caress her face. "It's going to be alright. Just don't do that again."

Usagi gasped, stunned, her hands falling from his face in disbelief. Of all of the things he could have said at that moment, she hadn't quite expected that.

"Mamo-chan," she rasped, shaking her head. "We have to do it again. You have to do it with me so we can go home."

His guarded expression faltered for a moment, and he swallowed, carefully lifting her off his lap before he turned, and calmly swung his legs over the edge of the mattress before standing. Usagi could only watch, wide-eyed from her kneeling position on the bed, as he strode towards the door before halting in his tracks.

He stood there quietly for a moment, back tense and turned towards her, before he swiveled back around, his expression hard and angry in a way that she hadn't seen since she'd first met him all those years ago when they were just kids.

"No," he rasped hoarsely. "It's too dangerous. You could have died. We're not doing it. We'll just have to wait."

Usagi exhaled slowly, shaking her head in confusion. "Wait for what, Mamo-chan?" she snapped in response. "This is how we get out of here, and we have to. I— I heard them. The Senshi. They're fighting to free us."

Mamoru was unmoved, and again, he shook his head. "We'll just have to wait for them to kill the Cardian, then."

Usagi gasped, frustrated that her typically unfailingly logical husband was suddenly being incredibly irrational. "What?" she hissed. "That's insane! Mamo-chan, like you said, this is a dream, and we could be here for years—"

"So, what?" Mamoru interrupted, and Usagi sucked in a pained, horrified breath because that guarded look that he'd been sporting crumpled, and the sorrow etched into his expression tore at her heart. "Would it be so bad? To stay here? With the girls and me?"

Usagi was at a loss for words, feeling gutted, torn to pieces, tears spilling from her eyes because she wished with everything in her heart that this was the life meant for her, but it wasn't, and she couldn't stay.

Mamoru choked on a dry, humorless laugh as he raked his fingers through his hair. "You asked me that first day when we woke up, Usako," he rasped, eyes glistening with tears. "You asked me whose dream this was," he paused, swallowing, shoulders slumping miserably. "It's mine. Do you know why I obsessively searched for the princess of my dreams? Do you know why I fought youma's and broke into jewelry stores? It's because she was all I had growing up."

Usagi couldn't breathe, frozen in place, fingers pressed to her lips in horror, her chest aching with heartfelt sorrow as she watched the only man she would ever love as he crumbled before her eyes. He fell to his knees at the edge of the bed, his elbows pressing into the mattress.

"Usako, please," he pleaded. "Those kids? The ones you talked about helping? I was one of those kids. I just want to belong to someone. I just want to belong to you. I want Chibiusa and Kousagi. I want this. Please stay here with me."

Usagi choked on a sob, scrambling from the bed, sheets tangling around her legs as she slipped from the mattress, falling to the floor in front of him with a dull thud as her knees collided with the hardwood.

"Mamo-chan," she whimpered, reaching for him. He recoiled backward, if anything even more devastated than he had been.

"Usako, please don't look at me like that," he pleaded hoarsely, dropping his head into his hands. "Please, I couldn't stand it if you pitied me."

The statement pierced through her sorrow and Usagi sucked in a breath, heartbroken that he could ever think that she would pity him. Wiping the tears from her face with the back of her hand, squaring her shoulders with determination, she slid forward until her knees pressed up against his. As tenderly as possible, she lightly settled her hands on his wrists.

"Mamo-chan, look at me," she demanded, her tone firm but filled with every ounce of compassion that she possessed. Her breath hitched when he lifted his head and his eyes were red-rimmed, filled with grief. Usagi exhaled a shuddering breath. "You think that this look on my face is pity?" she rasped, lower lip trembling with barely restrained emotion. "It's not pity, Mamo-chan. I love you. This is love." He opened his mouth as if to protest, but Usagi continued before he could speak. "And let me ask you a question," she demanded. "Before we woke up here, had you ever laid eyes on the Senshi in civilian forms? Spoken to them outside of battles against youmas and Cardians?"

Mamoru frowned, clearly confused by her line of questioning. "No, of course, I—"

"That's right," she interrupted curtly. "You hadn't. You met them here because this isn't your dream. At least not completely. It's mine."

He inhaled sharply, brow furrowed, utterly perplexed, and Usagi wanted to weep. She wanted to pull him into his arms and never let him go because she'd only just discovered that while she'd spent all this time knowing that they'd woken up in her dream world, it had never once occurred to Mamoru that this was something she would dream of, too.

Blinking back a new onslaught of tears, she leaned forward, cradling his face in her hands. This time she was the one to wipe away his tears, her thumbs swiping along his cheekbones with all the gentleness that he'd always shown her.

"Furthermore," she whispered, voice breaking with emotion. "Regardless of which world we live in, this one, or the one in which we both work together to find the freaking princess and her ridiculously powerful crystal, you do belong to me."

Her heart skipped a beat, brimming with hope because it was working. She was making an impression as she watched Mamoru's tortured expression lighten. His brow smoothed out as he seemed to regain control of his emotions, and the corner of his lips quirked up ever so slightly, though his shoulders were still slumped in defeat.

"I'm serious, Mamo-chan," she warned. "I'm like ridiculously possessive? I've been keeping it under control here by reminding myself that all the pretty girls you encounter aren't even real, but just prepare yourself for a whole ton of possessiveness! Unless… I mean, unless you don't like that? Then, in that case, I'm going to need you to disregard everything I've just said, and—"

She gasped in surprise when Mamoru curled his arms around her waist, hauling her against him so tightly she had to suck in a sharp breath as he buried his face in the crook of her neck.

"Usako," he rasped against her skin, though his tone was a little lighter. "You're ridiculous, you know that?" She opened her mouth to protest indignantly, but he continued before she could respond. "And just so you know, you're mine too…" he paused, and Usagi melted against him, sighing softly. "Can I just hold you like this for a minute?"

She let the way her body leaned into his, her hands tenderly smoothing back his hair from his face, answer his question. They sat there for longer than a minute, both internally wrestling with the weight of their loss, only the sound of their breathing piercing through the silence.

Usagi knew that he was ready when he sighed, tensing as if steeling his resolve before pulling back to look into her eyes. His expression was steady and filled with resignation. "Kousagi and Chibiusa?"

Usagi swallowed, doing her best to keep the devastation from her face, though she knew by the sorrow mirrored in Mamoru's eyes that she'd failed miserably.

"It'll only be harder if we see them again."

He nodded because he knew that she was right. If they stood up right now and made their way back to Makoto's to say goodbye to their children that didn't actually exist, but that they couldn't help but love with all their hearts, they'd never leave.

"We'll see them again, Mamo-chan," Usagi promised in a heartfelt whisper, and she meant it.

Mamoru nodded, and Usagi leaned forward, eyelids fluttering shut as she softly brushed her lips across his, tangling her fingers through the soft, silken strands of hair at the nape of his neck. "Close your eyes and take a deep breath, Mamo-chan."

This time when she fell back into the tunnel, unwittingly revealed to her by Rei, she wasn't alone. And when she opened her eyes in that terrifying, thorn-filled pod, Mamoru fought with her. Falling from the pod that had been both her prison and the very best thing to ever happen to her, Usagi decided that her fate wasn't written in the cosmos or a dream crafted by a monster. No matter what her future held, she would carve her pathway to happiness with Mamoru by her side.