How to Rescue Harry From a Brick With Only Eleven People
By SilverWolf7007
Chapter Three: Torture and Time Stoppage
Harry had been in the cell for an indeterminable amount of time – and he was not enjoying it.
The pink bars had begun to glow radioactively not long after Pansy had arrived, causing him to cringe away from them. Unfortunately, it was a four walled cage, so that left him cowering in the very middle – where, conveniently enough, a large blue cushion was situated.
The three Slytherins, one reporter, one Hufflepuff fangirl, one wannabe photographer, and one miraculously cured of memory loss moron were standing around the cage, each one trying their own personal tortures on the Boy-Who-Lived.
The large fluffy bunny rabbit in a Barney suit had, thankfully, disappeared. Harry had been tempted to throw a party when he'd realised that. Of course, as the only people who would be able to attend were currently torturing him (admittedly in a rather obscure way), he decided against the party.
It wasn't long before Harry received a shock. Not an electric shock, which he soon began to see as preferable, but a shock nonetheless.
His tormentors were backing away, suddenly silent. There was an expression of fearful respect on each of their faces, an expression Harry had always imagined the Death Eaters wore around Voldemort.
Dr Brian walked forward, Mr Psychiatrist on his heels. "Greetings, young kidnapped wizard," he said brightly.
Harry raised an eyebrow. "I'm not entirely certain I like your tone, Doc," he warned.
Not intimidated in the least, Dr Brian chuckled. "Don't think you can intimidate me, prisoner! I work for Lord Brickie."
As though summoned by his very name, the brick in question appeared.
Were he not in a cage due to it, Harry probably would have laughed at the vision before him. Laughed, choked, and kicked it over just for the fun of it. Causing it much pain.
Okay, so Harry was feeling a little tense.
Brickie was larger than the average brick. He was two feet tall, rectangular, and a dark brownish red. This was not the part that almost amused Harry.
For the Lord High Brick of Brickland was dressed appropriately for his station, in a long, red fur cape trimmed (of course) in white fur, there was a golden crown set with rubies atop his head – and in his hand (attached to an arm, attached to his body, which really worried Harry) there was a three foot long solid gold staff, with what appeared to be a tennis ball sized ruby attached to the tip.
Harry blinked. "I'm guessing you're the block of clay that put me in this cage, huh?"
He was treated to a scowl – yes, this brick had a face and all.
"Indeed," replied a clipped, slightly gravely tone. "And now, I am going to honour you by performing a song.
Harry, who had been feeling an odd sense of déjà vu since he'd laid eyes on Dr Brian and Mr Psychiatrist, felt a tingle of dread go up his spine and settle on his head.
"Dr Brian! Mr Psychiatrist! Bring me the Purple Plastic Mike of Doom and the Evil Blue Milk Crate/Stage! I shall perform my hit single for Mr Potter here!"
The two minions in question did as they were asked, and Harry noted as they did so that they both had bright pink earplugs in their ears – obviously only to block out certain sounds.
They helped Brickie onto his makeshift stage and Harry repressed a terrified shudder as Dr Brian passed over the mike.
"Yeah, I'm so evil! I am the evilest guy in the world! I am the most evil! I am an evil brick! I will rule the world! I will I will I will! Yeah, yeah, yeah!"
Harry forced back a scream.
Lucius was the first to realise that they had developed a slight problem, and that was only because he was desperately searching for something to distract him from Sylvan and James's argument, which had only gotten weirder once they had moved off the subject of colours.
"Uh, Remus," he began, hurrying to catch up with their leader.
The man in question turned around and raised a curious eyebrow, obviously glad to be called back for something other than Sirius making Severus's life as miserable as possible. "Yes, Lucius?"
"Have you noticed that we've been walking for three hours, it only took us half an hour to walk in to the forest to the shack in the first place, and that we're still in the forest?"
Remus blinked, turning in a circle to inspect their current environment. "You know, I can honestly say that I've been distracted enough to miss that up until now. Um…this is a problem, isn't it?"
"Yes," Lucius murmured. "And I don't know what we can do about it."
"I do," Remus said grimly. "But it may involve a lot of mental pain and stress for us all."
Lucius winced. "And what is this brilliant idea of yours?"
"We ask those morons back there who live in this forest, of course."
"Oh yeah," the blond said sheepishly. "I didn't think of that…possibly on purpose. I'm not sure I'd want to get into the middle of their argument about…what are they arguing about now?"
Remus sighed wearily. "They seem to be trying to decide which of them is more honest…and I believe it may be a game. Called Honest Vamp. There are rules and everything."
"Oh dear."
"Quite."
"So, who are we sending into the danger zone?" Lucius asked with a smirk.
Remus smirked back. "Well, Sirius seems to having trouble finding something to occupy him…"
For a moment, both men thought this was a good idea. Then they realised that, left to talk to the two vampires, there was a very good possibility that Sirius would never get the answers they wanted, as he had the unfortunate tendency to grate violently on Sylvan's nerves.
"Perhaps not," Lucius said, wincing.
"Good point," Remus agreed. "Severus is still too annoyed to hold any type of decent conversation, and the twins are unable to get over Percy being able to smirk in a non-smug arsehole manner, and Percy himself is too busy having fun with his brothers…"
"Which leaves," Lucius realised. "Either you and I, or Draco and Hermione."
"Or all four of us," Remus corrected. "I can see those four killing each other as well, left to their own devices. We'll have to be brave, Lucius. But we can bring the kiddies along."
Lucius took a deep breath and nodded. "So, are we going in?"
Remus replied by turning, grabbing Hermione's arm and dragging the feebly protesting girl to the back of the group. Sighing, Lucius did the same to his son and followed.
It only took them moments to reach the arguing vampires, even with the two confused and struggling teenagers in tow.
"No, James, I believe that you are mistaken. As you agreed before, nicknames that are derived from a person's actual name do not count as against the rules. So I can call you Jimmy, or Jim, or Jimmykins – "
"But please don't," his dark haired companion murmured.
"And you can call me Sylv. But you can't call me Blondie."
James frowned thoughtfully. "By your reasoning, I could also refer to you as Sylvia, or Silly."
Sylvan blinked, blinked again, and sighed. "All right, point to you?"
"Thank you," James replied with a somewhat smug smile. "But I think your argument, that brought about my point, had merit of its own. A tie, I think. We've now won three rounds each. Shall we continue to round six?"
"In a moment," Sylvan said, turning away from him. "First I believe we should find out what our esteemed leader, his self appointed second in command and their kiddies-in-tow wish to talk to us about."
"That's a good plan," James agreed.
Both vampires turned and gave their complete attention to the four.
Remus was the only one not daunted by the fixated gaze from one pair of dark blue and one pair of dark gold eyes. So while Lucius, Draco and Hermione shifted nervously, he was ready to bring up their little issue.
"We have a problem, boys," he told them. "Do you realise how long we've been walking for? We should be well out of the forest by now."
"What?" Sylvan yelped. "But we've only been walking for – " He looked at his watched and stopped. "Oh," he said quietly. "I guess we lost track of time…"
James, who didn't actually wear a watch of his own, grabbed Sylvan's hand and turned it so he could study the dark blue face and white numbers. He shook it, tapped it and frowned at it thoughtfully.
Sylvan finally pulled his hand back. "Jimmy. I do need that hand, you know."
"Of course. Sorry."
Remus sighed. "Any ideas, then?"
The vampires exchanged a glance before answering together. "Not a clue."
Draco, however, after hearing their problem, came up with a backup plan that probably should have been Plan A. "How about you, Granger? Any theories?"
Hermione grinned brightly and nodded. "Oh yes. You see, I believe that the evil Lord Brickie somehow found out either where our little group is, or, and this is the theory I truly support, he found out where the meeting of the AAB was to be held."
Lucius and even Remus were stunned beyond words, as were Sirius, Percy, Fred, George, Sylvan and James.
Draco, however, was just listening in with a slight smirk, having known she'd probably have a good idea of what was going on.
Severus, too, had known Hermione quite well over the past six or so years, and was used to her going off on a brilliant rant. "Go on, Miss Granger."
"Well, what would you do if you found out where the people who were likely to want to rescue your current hostage were holding a meeting to plot against you?" she asked the group.
Percy blinked. "Kill them all off?"
Hermione frowned. "All right, so that's the better idea. But if all I've heard about him is true, I firmly suspect that Brickie is completely and utterly nutters."
Draco was nodding. "Yes, and when you're completely insane, you always use the second or third best plans. Not for any real reason, of course," he added.
"Well no," James agreed. "You just do. And that's why Brickie has done…whatever he's done." He turned to Hermione expectantly.
"I think…well, I think he's trapped the forest in a time loop. Or something." She faltered slightly. "I don't really know for sure, of course, and I could easily be way off track."
But Sylvan was shaking his head, beginning to grin. "No, you're absolutely right!"
"I am?" she demanded happily.
"She is?" the twins echoed, somewhat sceptical.
Hermione glared at them.
"Yes, she is," Sylvan confirmed. We're not stuck in a time loop, exactly, we're stuck in time itself!"
"Of course!" Remus exclaimed. "Because of the failsafe, yes?"
Both Sylvan and James nodded.
"Okay, let's move backwards for those of us without telepathy," Sirius protested.
"Do not have telepathy," Remus muttered in a sulky tone.
"We know, Remus," Lucius told him, patting him on the head. He received a glare for his troubles.
Sylvan sighed and decided it was up to him to explain. "All right, you lot. The shack in the forest is protected by a failsafe mechanism that's designed to go off two ways. Way one is if someone tries to blow it up, or shoot it, or something like that. Way two, which is probably what Brickie did, is a little switch that it's impossible not to pull if you're trying to meddle with it."
"And what does it actually do?" Fred and George asked.
"Why, it stops time in the forest, of course."
"Stops time in the forest?" Hermione asked with a confused frown. "But even if it stopped time, it wouldn't actually stop us leaving."
"Well no," James allowed. "It also has illusions, barriers and the occasional deterrent spell to stop you accidentally leaving when the outside world might be completely uninhabitable."
"Then how do we get out and save Harry?" Sirius demanded.
"Simple," James told him with a bright grin. "We go out the back door exit thingy."
"The…back door…exit thingy…?" Draco said weakly.
"Oh yes," Sylvan said. "We've got to have some way of getting out, don't we?"
"I…suppose so," Sirius agreed.
You know, Brickie originally came into existence as a prop in one of my Animorph scripts. I think Marco used him to whack an hysterical Erek over the head with, and then Tobias, Tom and Jalil (I think) adopted him – up until the point he talked to them. He then starred as the evil villain kidnapping Harry in Tobias's Secret.
Yes, that little story was to delay the grovelling.
(Grovels pitifully)
Okay, that's over.
Anyway, billions of thanks to those who reviewed, billions and billions and billions…okay, so maybe I'm still grovelling a little…
the crazy ladies, LoonyLoopyLisa, Vanyaria Shadow, silver-sunn101, SlytherinSilverPrince, JulyFlame, Queen's Own Herald Talia, SpaceMonkey-Lover-SG1, Prince Snivellus, SiriusWolf, NSW, Elle, Werewolf Coquette, Kira, aniala, HeadGirl1, SBR, hermione1208, DeppDRACOmaniac, #1Draco/HermioneShipper.
Again, thanks all so much.
Please forgive me for the long wait.
Please review!
S. Wolf