For the Month One-Shot exchange a HPFC- June 2020

A gift!fic for ProfessorSev. I hope you enjoy it!

The prompts are:

Severus Snape x Minerva McGonagall - platonic pairing

Hurt / Comfort

guilt

Words 687

My footsteps echo through the hallway; Quick taps on the stone floor. The dungeons are eerily silent. It is just past curfew, and not a single person - student or professor - is out. I arrive at my destination and knock on the dark wood door.

Severus had been summoned at 7:30, and just now returned. As always, he had alerted Albus before leaving. Usually, he comes straight to Albus after returning, too. Tonight, however, we haven't seen him since.

After receiving no answer, I knock once again. A million thoughts rush through my head. What if he's hurt? What if Albus was wrong, and he hasn't returned yet? I reach for the door, but of course, it's locked.

I knock one last time before trying every unlocking spell I know. Finally, it opens. I quickly take in the room, noticing the perfect neatness of the room. Everything is in its place. Except for his desk, that is. His desk is on the far left side of the room. Papers and books are piled in the corners, and jars of potion ingredients yet to be sorted onto shelves fill the rest of the desk. Honestly, I'm not sure how, or if, he works at the desk.

I hear a shuddered breath and turn my attention straight ahead of me. The small living area consists only of a small couch and chair, both turned towards the empty fireplace. I walk towards the couch and see Severus sitting on the edge, staring a hole through the opposite wall.

"Severus?" I ask.

He looks up at me for a moment, before masking his dazed expression with a blank one.

"McGonagall," he acknowledges with a nod.

"Is everything alright?" I ask cautiously.

Severus has always been very closed off. I know that if I ask too much, he will shut down. Too many times, I have asked him questions, only to be answered with a scowl.

He closes his eyes tiredly and takes a breath before answering, "The Headmaster should be notified before it gets out to the press: A half-blood family has been murdered, and the Dark Mark was conjured."

He says this seriously but still has a somewhat dazed voice. He must have witnessed it.

"Severus," I start.

"I killed her," he whispers, "She would have started Hogwarts next year, and I killed her,"

I sit down next to him. His hands are trembling.

"They tortured her. They used Cruciatus for almost ten minutes. They used the cutting curse I invented,"

Though he tries to hide it, playing the part of a spy gets to him. Not only does he have to relive his worst days, when he joined them voluntarily, but he has to witness and take part in ruthless murders. He turned to them when he was young, but he was never truly one of them.

"They made me finish her off... I killed her," he says in a weak whisper.

His breath speeds up until he is practically gasping for air. Sometimes I wonder how Albus doesn't see what this is doing to him. I'm not sure what to do. He has never opened up to me about anything.

After a moment's hesitation, I do the only thing I can think of. I wrap my arms around him gently and pull him into a hug. I expect resistance, but none comes. Instead, he goes limp and leans into me.

I rock him back and forth, and slowly his breath returns to normal.

"It's not your fault," I whisper to him. A single tear runs down his face and is quickly followed by another. A moment later, he's sobbing into my arms. Listening to it is terrible. Severus never shows even a hint of emotion. He is constantly wearing a blank mask, that only changes to look annoyed. Yet, here he is, sobbing.

I barely notice the single tear that runs down my own cheek.

He'll probably be annoyed with me when he wakes up, but looking down at his tear-stained face, I know I can't leave.

I rock him gently, and he drifts off to sleep.