A/N

My mind is set on me making some kind of self insert fic. I had two ideas for this and flipped a coin. An MHA based fic where the semi-si/oc has the power of overdramatic stageplay (Background music, action replay, weird camera angles. No lie I went hella into the power building for it. It sounds as stupid as you think but gets busted if used correctly). Or a Naruto based fic where the semi-si/oc has no real jutsu and has to use shadow puppetry for selfmade jutsus. You can see which won the flip.

This has been edited to fix for some glaring mistakes I've noticed.

Death is constant... No one can stop it... No one can hide from it... In the end... It always arrives..."State... r... sh..."

"Fuck me my head hurts." One sec I'm chilling with family at an IHOP next it's almost a full recreation of final destination. I can't see right now so i have no idea how bad it is.

"That wish cannot be granted." I may not be able to see but I sure as fuck can hear that voice.

"The hell... Shenron?"

"I have chosen a form to most suit your description of a God."

"I can't exactly see this form anyways. It's way too dark in here." I can't feel anything from the neck down probably because the god being not wanting me to freak out and run.

"You cannot see due to your lack of eyes. You also lack 86% of your total body." I'm pretty sure I would be grateful for being greeted by a God but my lack of everything is numbing the experience.

"The hell do you mean I lack 96% of my body!" If I had a body I'm positive it would be thrashing around.

"You lack 86% of your body. I have given those who have faced gruesome deaths a chance for a new better life."

I feel an odd sense of tranquility. The God's attempt to calm what's left of my nerves. "W-who else have you done this for?" I studdered, to hell with it I'm allowed to studder in the face of endless possibilities.

"Many of the victims of Jack the Ripper. Notably his own mother, reborn and made herself into a saint, Mother Teresa to be correct."

Well shit I don't have a good reason to reject it but even Gods could make mistakes. Just look into the bible for that. "Any that you regret?"

"One boy... He attempted to convert everyone... Even though force... The name Adolf should be a big enough clue... I don't wish to remember that boy for what he became but rather as he once was."

Oh... oh... I feel like complete garbage now. "You said I had a wish?"

"You have one wish while you are reborn into a new better life on Earth or a new world altogether. Should you choose a new world. I would need specifications on how the world would work. You shall remember your old life and all you have learned from it. However, you shall have no knowledge of the world you are being reborn on as well as the personality of your younger self."

"... I guess to be reborn in the world of the manga called Naruto. I haven't seen much of the show and read only a little bit of the manga. I wish to be born around the same time as it's hero with a bloodline ability of my own!" Hell yeah. Sick superpowers and my own ninja team. This is going to be sick!

"Very well... You shall be reborn with your own bloodline ability. However, as your wish contains two halves I shall put a penalty against you." Oh no. No no no no no. "You shall only be capable of using the basic jutsus of this world. Farwell!"

"I am soo fucked aren't I..." Before anything else could happen I can see a bright light. Wait I can see?

(Unknown Area)

I wake up in the middle of a clearing with no one in sight. I remember having a weird dream. A different kind of world. It was nice in a weird way. I didn't like the ending, bad endings like those always make me jolt awake. Getting up and dusting my pants off I walk towards the closest building I could find. Said building being an orphanage. I could see kids running and playing with each other.

'I wonder if they got a playground around here.' Walking around the building I can see a lone boy sitting on a swing. He looks really familiar. I should know him from something.

Unsure of what to do I walk towards the boy and greet him to the best of my ability. "Oi, yo, what up, how's it going?"

The boy looks to me with the face of pure confusion. "Yeah okay not my best intro. What's up with you. Sitting here on your own and sulking like this. At least use the swing set as it's meant to be used."

He gives me a sad look. I'm talking kicked puppy level of sadness. "No one wants to play with me. The adults keep calling me evil and the other kids just agree with them."

I kinda just froze from that. I just couldn't think of anything to say to that. "... So you wanna come play some games with me instead?"

He brightens up almost immediately from that. "My name's Uzamaki Naruto! I may only be 8 but just wait. I'm going to be the next Hokage! Everyone is gonna be aware of who I am!"

'This boy... I don't know how to put it but he just lights up the area.' Seeing him in his upbeat state just gives off a feeling of good vibes. "That's an awesome dream. I'm aiming to be the world's first superhero! My name is..."

'What was it again... I'll just make something up from what I can remember.' All that comes to mind is the dream from earlier. Memories of games and mangas come to mind easier than the real life. "Um... My name is Akira Raiden, I'm also 8. Future hero of the stars!"

"I don't know what a superhero is but if it's anything like a hokage your gonna have some competition." Naruto replied, looking smug as a fox.

'Oh it's on Blond boy.' I slap his forehead and run into the trees. He falls off the swing and lands on his back from the sudden attack. "Tag you're it!"

We spent a good amount of time chasing one another occasionally talking when close enough. By the end of the day we make it back to the swings. "I thought you were an orphan too, Naruto?"

"I am but jiji decided to have me get my own apartment instead of living here."

"Lucky! I have to be stuck here with all these random people... Hey, when does school start anyways?"

"Eh... You want to go to that boring academy! It starts up in a couple weeks but I can't see why you want to know?"

I smile at him. "You telling me that you want to be the Hokage while being as dumb as a rock. Its going to be tough that way

Naruto explodes into a rant. "Like hell I'm gonna be stupider than anyone! The Hokage is the best of the best!" We continue chatting for a while with Naruto showing me around the village.

The sun eventually sets and I walk towards the orphanage and make my way towards the caretaker. This is going to be the start of a great new life for me

Academy was odd to say the least. Hand seals were hard to memorize and the jutsu names were harder kanji is weird. I kept giving things new names to remember them or simply shortening the name. Bushin no jutsu being clone jutsu or instance. Some people find it annoying to understand what I mean mainly the teachers.

The classes themselves being weirder. Classes based on ninjutsu and genjutsu are difficult to pick up for me despite the amount of effort I put in. Taijutsu and any non-chakra based classes aren't too bad. Mathematics isn't as difficult as most of the other students yell about. Not that I'm the top student, I'll take guess and say the 6th or lower. Ninjutsu and genjutsu pull me down by a lot.

That's not to say I'm necessarily bad at it. I can't pick it up as easily as the others. The hand signs are too weird for me.

Time went on and final exams are upon us again. Despite the fact that it's called final exam it happens multiple times in the year. Many are recommended to put it off until older with some talking about the jounin ranked Kakashi who supposedly passed at the age of 5.

Naruto has so far attempted to pass the exam twice and both have failed. Many classmates have repeatedly bring up the fact as in insult but I can't see why. He at least attempted to do it.

Naruto once again is brought into the class tied up and brought to the attention of the classroom. It almost seemed like a medieval public execution, whatever that is.

"C'mon Naruto get your act together. The Graduation exam is tomorrow and you failed the last 2 times already. Now isn't the time for your stupid pranks, moron."

"Whatever." It was the only answer he gave. Of course it lead to Iruka-sensei being angry and demanding a test.

"EVERYONE LINE UP! Use the henge no jutsu and transform into me perfectly!"

One by one everyone went by and completed the test with no issue. "Akira Raiden. You're up next."

'My turn! Hell yeah!' Lets see its dog boar and ram. "Tranformation jutsu!"

A puff of smoke erupts and standing in front of Iruka-sensei is another Iruka. Giving myself a quick look over and seeing everything right I look back up to the teacher and smile. "OK, good. Next, Uzumaki Naruto!"

Iruka-sensei sees me drop the transformation jutsu and checks his list. "OK, good. Next, Uzumaki Naruto!" He turns back to me and glares for mocking him earlier.

Naruto walks forward and makes the signs. "Henge!!"

What follows is essentially a female Naruto standing in the middle of the classroom naked. Iruka launching back with a jet of nose-blood. Followed by a lot of yelling.

The school day ends and I head to the orphanage since Naruto's gonna be busy with cleaning the Hokage mountain.

Next day started and so did the exam. Getting up and ready took no time at all and I managed to get to the academy before the bell. As usual Iruka-sensei is in front of the classroom.

"Welcome students. As many of you should know by now, today is the graduation exam. To graduate you have to do the Bushin no jutsu when called into the room."

Despite sitting away from Naruto, All it took was a single glance to see the moron shake in his sandals. I've tried time and time again to figure out why he can't get it right but it's just bad control on his end. I can't do much to help him there.

Everyone continues to be called up for the test and come back with a headband. Eventually it's my turn to be tested.

'Ram, tiger and snake.' I continue to repeat to myself as I make my way up to Iruka and his partner Mizuki. "Clone Jutsu!"

Out of the smoke and steam stand 2 clones of myself. Upon seeing the jutsu worked correctly I along with the 2 clones bow our heads. The clones disperse and I grab a headband. Making sure to tie it on while making my way back to class.

I give Naruto a nod and a smile. I know he'll graduate this time. Third times the charm you know.

Class has ended and everyone is outside cheering. I spot Shino and Kiba among the group but not Naruto. Looking out towards the swing set where we meet as kids I see him far too depressed for my liking.

"Yo Naruto!" I shout out, walking up to him. "Dude. I get you messed up again but you can't let it bring you down man. Look at that Rock Lee guy. He only passed for his good taijutsu (and maybe the teachers didn't wanna see those eyebrows anymore). Try asking one of them to see if you can get a pass too."

Naruto just sits there deep in thought when he jumps into standing position. "Your right. How the hell can eyebrows over there pass when he can't use jutsus at all!"

"That's the spirit Naruto! Ask around for advice or something dude."

"I'll see you around Raiden. Don't wait for me just go on home. I'm sure this will take a good while."

Leaving Naruto behind I start making my way towards home. Or in this case orphanage. Turning around I can spot Iruka-sensei with the Hokage as well as Naruto asking Mizuki-sensei something. Today was a pretty good day in my opinion.

A/N

FUCKING HELL THIS TOOK ME A WHILE! FUCK WRITING ABOUT THE ACADEMY! THE ACADEMY HAS NO REAL INFO IN THE MANGA OR ANIME AND IS JUST WRITEN IN FOR FLASHBACK PURPOSES MOST OF THE TIME! FUCKING FINAL EXAM BULLSHITERY!

Okay enough of that. I'm glad this is over. I'm going to be focused on this more than my others (not that its difficult to not focus on something forgotten). I don't write as a hobby but out of boredom or random spark of creativity.

See you later space cowboy.