Fandom: SVU

Title: Answer The Call

Chapter 1: Unexpected News

A/N: I own my plots and original characters all others belong to NBC and Dick Wolf, this is for entertainment purposes only. No profits are made from this.

Manhattan Special Victims Unit, NYPD

Office Of Olivia Benson

December 2014

"I'm glad you are here, Olivia."

"So am I Hank wish it were under different circumstances."

"That's the life we signed up for."

"Yes, it is Hank; you are correct; it's not always pretty out here, Olivia, but when we get it right."

"We remember why we keep going, no matter how hard or how horrible the cases are."

"That's correct why don't we shop the cop talk, for now, Hank, I am only in town till tomorrow morning and I would love to see some more of your beautiful city."

Slipping my hand into his firm grip, I feel it tighten around mine warm secure yet nervous; it''s always reassuring to me to see a confident big man like Hank Voight become a puddle of nervous over something as simple as liking a woman.

"I know just the place now, Olivia. It's stunning, of course, nothing as magnificent as you."

My cheeks fill with color as I feel my whole body tingle. I know it's just blood rushing through my veins, but it feels as if pins and needles are coursing through every cell fiber and muscle.

"You think I am beautiful?"

"You doubt my words, Sargent?"

Grinning as I brush my hair back, I feel my whole spirit lifted. "It's been a long time since anyone's ever told me I am beautiful, Hank."

"Well, that's a shame Olivia, because you are amazing. If you give me the chance to show you, I will make sure you know just how special you are every day of your life."

Pregnant, it can't be my hands shake so hard I can barely hold the test in my hands. It's been three months since my visit to Chicago now I can't take a breath fully. Pregnant at fifty years old with a one-year-old at home. No, this can not be happening I can't have a baby not now with a high demanding job as a Sargent of one of the most elite units in Manhattan.

Pregnant this has to be a joke this has to be one of the rookie's idea of a prank this can't be happening the test drops out of my shaking hands. I can feel everything in me, pounding at an alarming rate—blood pumping through every body part pounding in my ears.

It's fast

So fast, my heart is in Convulsions at the sudden onset of rushing liquid; the tingling of pins and needles has gone from my feet to my hands, mixing all over my shivering body. Tears mist making my vision hazy, I feel as if I'm looking through a kaleidoscope so many brilliant colors mixing with spots of blackness. I need to sit; the world is spinning dangerously off-kilter. Breathing has become troublesome too tricky, it shouldn't be this damn difficult. I've been breathing on my own for fifty years why is it so suddenly a labored effort causing a full-body sweat. Every breath makes my stomach turn in violent waves. Just lean your head back, Olivia closes your eyes, try to breathe.

Tension grips it's fingers around my entire body, so many questions fill my head can I consider having a child at fifty years old. Is it even safe? Will I miscarry? What are the risks for older patients? Can I possibly hold down a full time demanding job as a Sargent raise a one-year-old? Will the stress be too much for my body? What are the chances of congenital disabilities? Complications? Preeclampsia, or gestational diabetes.

Even thinking about all this is causing me so much damn stress I can feel the acid burning up my esophagus my whole body is on fire I am exhausted. "Sargent?" a knock on the door startles me causing me to jump my eyes slide open as I struggle to breathe normally. Thankfully my vision has cleared "Rollins? What do you want? This isn't a good time!"

The rest of my words die on my lips when I see Amanda Rollins standing in my doorway looking whiter than a ghost; her lips are dry. Even if I wasn't a detective, I could spot the shaking of her limbs a mile away as much as I want to chase her out of my office, not anywhere in the mood for one of her damn drama's. I am her Superior officer, so I should ask her what is going on.

"Yes, Rollins? This better be good, I have no time for your shit today."

I hear Amanda suck in her breath are those tears in her eyes? A fine sweat has broken out over her forehead. "I'm sorry, is this a bad time? I can uh come back another time ow!" A sudden scream of pure pain from her makes me look up, alarmed. I can see her slumped over against the door-frame "Rollins?" Reacting quickly, I race over to my door, grabbing her.

"I'm okay, Sarge." Amanda's breathing has quickened in pace so fast her color has dropped even paler. My hands grab her shoulders "Can I just sit down for a minute, please? I'm feeling a little light-headed."

Closing the door, I wrap my arm across her waist tightly. "Of course you can." "Liv, I'm sorry you don't have to help me. I'll be okay to walk over by myself." Amanda's steps are shaky at best I can hear the staggered breaths passing between her lips, her racing heartbeat. Her stomach is turning in extreme queasiness, sounding grievously painful. Amanda's skin is clammy and cold to the touch sweaty.

"I'll be the judge of that Rollins."

"Do you need some water?" Biting her lip, she lets out a few deep breaths before answering, "Yes, my throat is on fire." hurrying to the door, I take a quick look around at my squad room. "Amaro, grab two bottles of water, please." Turning back to Amanda, I feel my heart squeeze at the look of terror on Amanda's face when I mention Amaro "Hey, honey relax, he won't come in here. I just need the water."

"This is a mistake I shouldn't have come to you. I'm sorry." Amanda motions to stand swaying "Rollins, sit whatever is going on between you and Nick; you do not have to be afraid. It's just us two ladies."

"Thanks, Nick."

"Yeah, No problem Sarge, hey, is that Rollins in there? Is everything okay? Do you need anything?"

"No Nick, we're fine thank you go back to work."

"Liv, I can."

"Go back to work as I just told you to, do not question my authority."

Slamming the door, I hand Amanda one of the bottles of water sitting next to her on the couch. "thanks, Sarge."

Watching her closely, I see her hands as she places the bottle against her forehead. "I feel so hot, Liv, like I am going to pass out." "Rollins lay back down, put your legs up." Gently I take her legs, placing them in my lap as she settles back onto the couch massaging her legs quickly.

"Take a deep breath slowly, Amanda count to three." holding her hand. I count with her slow and steady. Grabbing a cloth, I spray some water on it and place it over her forehead. "I'm going to loosen your blouse Amanda, your neck, throat are redder than Rudolph's nose." Putting my issues aside, I run my hands over her legs, not speaking, giving her time to gather herself. "Rollins, are you in some sort of trouble? You seem very nervous, you've been late every day for the last week you look like death. You've been fighting with Nick every day for two weeks. I've let it slide because I know how stressed you are, but it can't keep going on."

"I know Sarge I know I get it that I lost your trust I've been working my ass off to get back in your good graces, oh god!"

The sound of Amanda's stomach makes reminds me of a cartoon I used to watch as a kid called trolls. "Amanda, drink the water, sweetie. Your body is probably dehydrated." shaking hands slowly unscrew the top of her bottle. Wordlessly I placed my hand against hers, helping her to lift the bottle to her lips and holding her head up so she could drink.

Amanda drowns half the bottle of water sitting back, closing her eyes, her breathing hasn't eased, which worries me. "You want to get back into my good graces?" "Yes, Sarge, I'll do anything I'm sorry for taking up your time."

"Amanda don't apologize. I can see something is bothering you, so if you want me to trust you again, trust me to talk with me. I'm here to help you. I'm sorry I snapped. I just have a lot on my plate, which isn't your fault."

"So I am going to ask you again, are you in some sort of trouble?"

"Yes, Liv, oh, god!" Amanda's body bolts up her hand over her stomach "Head in between your legs." My hands rub over her back gently, "Breathe, breathe slow and deep." "Amanda, are you gambling again? Do you have bookies after you?"

Bending over to grab the garbage can I feel my stomach tighten, please God, do not let me be sick now. "Amanda, I can hear your stomach if you feel as if you are going to be sick. I have the garbage can here for you."

Picking her head up, I instantly see her eyes are red cheeks blushed sweat pouring down her body. "I'm sorry, Sarge; it's not that I am in trouble, just not that kind of trouble."

"Amanda, you can talk to me no judgment." Looking up at me, taking deep breaths, "Amanda, honey."

"Liv, I'm in trouble. I'm pregnant, and I have no idea who the father is; oh God!" moving fast, I grab the can, placing it between my knees holding her hair back, shoving the can under her mouth. When she's finished, I help her lean back. Putting her feet up, grabbing the cloth and running it over her face.

"Your pregnant Amanda?"

Slowly Amanda nods grunting. "So dizzy." taking her hand into mine, I feel how fast her pulse is racing. "How far along?" "three months." "Is that why Nick's pissed?" "Yeah, I told him two weeks ago that he might be the father, but I'm not sure we had broken up back in October for a month."

'Take deep breaths, Rollins, I'm not judging just keep focusing on talking to me, you're doing amazing."

"Do you mind telling me who the other man is?"

"Am I in trouble with this?"

"Amanda, why are you worried about that? Why are you afraid?"

"It's Declan Murphy, our former Lieutenant."

"Oh, Honey, you didn't."

Tears fill her eyes as she nods "I was drunk I don't even remember I was so drunk and so hurt by Nick. I didn't think Declan said I owed him, I was so fed up with myself so disgusted at how stupid I am, I let him have sex with me."

"Amanda, from what you told me, it sounds like he raped you."

"No, I won't go there Liv, I wasn't raped, I was drunk I made a stupid choice, but I never said No, besides I didn't tell you to get into a professional debate. I came to you as a friend."

"I got that sweetheart, and I am honored you trust me. I'm right here to listen."

"I won't go through this again, Liv I can't have another child I already have a teenager, I'm up to my head in debts I can barely keep a roof over our heads, my son has ten outfits that he's had for two years, I can't afford new clothes. Kim wiped me clean I haven't been able to recover. I can't even keep food in the cabinets because I have bookies threatening me daily."

"Rollins, I am so sorry I had no idea you are struggling this much."

"It's not your fault Olivia I don't want pity, I am not asking for sympathy. I just need a friend, I have no female friends in this city."

"I'm right here, Amanda, I can't tell you what to do or how to address this issue. I can promise you I am here. I will support you; there are options for adoption or abortion."

"If I were home, this would be so much easier; there would be no choice."

"Well, you are not home, my love, you are here in New York City. You have choices; I will support you if you need money, I can help you out we can call it a loan or just a friend helping a friend."

"No that's not what I cam here for Liv, I don't know if I could go through with it. The same as adoption, I know it's selfish, but I don't know If I can carry a child and give it up."

"Amanda it's a big decision sweetie adoption is great for some people it's not for everyone you would have to carry your child, sacrifice time in the field, loss of pay if you had complications and had to take time off, you would be putting your health on the line. It's a massive responsibility."

"One I can't afford right now I don't know if I want another child Zakaria is on the verge of getting kicked out of his second school. He's cursing out teachers, last week I caught him alone with a girl in his room, shirts off. He is so pissed off because his dad's not around, he blames me of course. Most mornings, I have to drag his lazy ass out of bed; he refuses to go to school, says he's tired and stressed out. He doesn't feel well. He always has some half-cocked excuse."

"I'm sorry, Amanda."

"You don't have to apologize, Sarge, none of this is on you; I'm just confused and depleted of all energy. I don't know how to handle this I have a teenager, no father around to help me. I haven't seen or talked to my parents in over ten years. How am I suppose to do this? I'm thirty-four I don't want to go through this again, you don't know how scary this shit is."

Laughing, I run my hands through her hair, "Amanda, try being fifty years old, single with a one-year-old and finding out you're pregnant."

Lifting her eyebrow, she stares open-mouthed, "Your...Pregnant?" placing my hand over my stomach, I get up, grabbing the test off my desk, handing it to her as I sit down. My eyes become wet with frustration and fear. Amanda sits up higher, "I wish I were kidding Amanda, believe me, I do."

'What are you going to do, Liv?"

Sitting closer to me, I take the test back, "God, you must be so scared." "Yeah, Amanda, I am. I want another baby about as much as you do, but the thought of abortion or giving up my child, I just can't fathom either."

I feel Amanda's arms wrap around my shoulders "Maybe we can get through this together." Turning towards her, I see her eyes are just as misty as mine. "Yeah, maybe we can Rollins."

(A/N/ Do you all want this story to stay in 2014, or have it jumped to the current time? Love reviews motivate me to keep going—any plot idea you would like to see in this feel free to PM me or review. Thanks for the favorites, follows. Have a pleasant Memorial Day everyone, God bless our troops be safe)