"I cannot be betrayed. I cannot be beaten."

9

Testing

I jerked awake on a cold floor, the sensation of falling quickly fading with my dream. The room was so dark that I had to blink to make sure my eyes were actually open. Rolling onto my side, I pulled myself sluggishly onto my knees. My hands were bound behind my back.

Ben.

Looking around, I realized that starlight filtered in from a nearby viewport. It illuminated the figures of unfamiliar objects inside the room. Planting one foot on the ground, I cautiously stood on wobbly knees. My body was sore all over, and I was hungrier than I had ever known. I stepped towards the viewport and staggered when my legs hit invisible objects along the way. Soon, I peered out the glass with my shoulder resting against the cold surface.

A plethora of unfamiliar stars stared back at me.

A door slid open behind me, casting a line of orange light across the floor. A silhouette stood in the doorway. It was a faceless shadow until the light clicked on overhead, filling the room. I winced at the sudden brightness.

"You're awake," a familiar voice stated.

I squinted at Ben from across the room. He stood there like a stranger would upon finding someone in their house. I stiffened at the intangible hostility between us.

"Where are we?" I asked, my voice a dry rasp.

Ben's tense posture remained as he stepped closer to me. "This is the First Order's flagship, The Marauder. We are deep inside the Unknown Regions."

My hair fell around me long and loose, and I ached to brush it out of my face. Instead, I looked at him from behind the veil, wondering what he was thinking under his guarded expression. My last memory—an awkward embrace in the rubble of the academy—flashed through my mind.

"You kidnapped me," I stated softly.

Ben's clenched jaw was the only evidence of his reaction. "I gave you a second chance," he corrected. He neared me with silent footsteps, his boots muffled by the thin carpet beneath us. Then, he murmured, "You should be grateful that I didn't kill you."

If the statement hadn't been so dire, I would have laughed at its absurdity. I had to crane my neck to look up at him and his expressionless eyes. "Well...kill me now, if you want to so badly," I choked out.

His mask didn't move an inch out of place as he stared down at me, eyes searching. I reached out to sense his resolve, and it was stronger than ever.

"I'm bringing you before my Master today," he said in a conversational tone. As if he couldn't resist the impulse, he brushed a lock of hair behind my ear. "He will not give you a second chance."

I stepped away from him, fingers twitching in my bonds. A bolt of fear shot through me at the thought of meeting a real Sith, and I couldn't keep it from tainting my voice. "Then you know what the outcome will be," I said.

Ben shrugged minutely. "No," he said, "and neither do you."

Veering away, Ben drew my gaze with him across the room. It appeared to be a modestly furnished bedroom. The dark walls and ceiling were polished black glass, much like the dreadnought I had boarded. Ben pulled a set of clothes out of a dresser before returning to me.

"Clean yourself up and put these on," he instructed. When he realized I couldn't reach out to take the clothes, he tossed them onto the bed with a dry chuckle. "Oh, I forgot."

His blase attitude made me grimace in disgust. Just days ago, he had slaughtered our friends...the younglings...everyone. I glared up at him as he watched me with a bemused expression.

"Turn around," he murmured.

I continued to stare, hoping to convey my thoughts and feelings with just my face. Ben frowned, and then reached around me to unlock my restraints. I gasped at our sudden closeness and tried to step away, prompting a soft growl of annoyance. I stilled when I felt a piece of cold metal press into my hip. A quick glance revealed it to be—

My lightsaber!

"Don't make this harder than it needs to be," Ben scolded, fumbling with my bonds.

As soon as my hands were free, I reached for my saber with lightning speed. Ben's arm blocked my hand and then pushed me back with enough force to knock the wind from my lungs. I staggered backwards, watching him with wide eyes as I caught my breath.

"There are ten thousand Stormtroopers, twenty generals, and two powerful Force users on this ship. And there is one of you." Pulling his cloak to cover the lightsaber from my greedy eyes, Ben scowled at me. "Don't try anything," he ground out.

Resigned, I scooped up the pile of clothes and followed him across the room to the refresher. It was larger than I was accustomed to, featuring a tub in the center, a shower to the side, and a large sink area. The door snapped shut behind me, and I heard Ben's keystrokes as he reprogrammed the lock from the outside.

Stepping in front of the mirror, I took in my appearance silently. My pale face appeared more gaunt than before, and my blue-green eyes were sunken and red-rimmed. I realized with a start that I hadn't used a mirror since my last night at the academy. In fact, I hadn't washed or braided my hair since then either. My auburn locks bunched around my shoulders in matted clumps, far beyond saving.

I glanced over the humble assortment of toiletries at the sink. The straight razor would do.

Rubbing my fingers through my freshly cropped hair in the shower, I lathered the shampoo until my scalp ached. The ghost of a smile whispered across my face. They always said I would end up just like my mother.

Alone with my thoughts, I felt the encroaching sense of defeat work its way into my mind. Ben was right—it would be senseless to attempt an escape. Unless Leia had somehow tracked me this far into the Unknown Regions, I was completely at the mercy of the First Order. For all she knew, I was still waiting at the academy for Tai's return. Tai's smiling face appeared in my mind, bringing the burning sensation of tears to my eyes.

An impatient knock at the door wrenched me from my thoughts. I shook my head vigorously to clear my mind.

"Almost done," I called, flipping on the dry cycle.

After donning the clothes, I returned to the mirror. I swept my short bangs across my forehead and fiddled with the surprisingly well-fit tunic. The dark cloth made me look paler than ever.

After the door slid open, an almost comical look of shock appeared on Ben's face.

He quickly schooled his expression and asked me to turn around, so he could bind my hands again. I did so wordlessly, glancing over my shoulder to watch the metal circles clamp around my wrists. As we left the bedroom, we passed through a lounge area of some kind. Ben used the Force to pull his lightsaber from a nearby workbench, which was littered with tools and wires. He secured it to his belt, clanking gently with mine, as we left his quarters.

"You first," Ben said, gesturing down the corridor.

A rush of adrenaline washed through me when I saw a patrol of Stormtroopers up ahead. When I made eye contact with Ben, I couldn't read his expression. He jerked his head to the side, urging me to take the lead.

Feeling the icy grip of fear taking hold of me, I began to stride down the hallway. As we passed by various droids and patrols, Ben guided me by tugging my shackles at each turn. I felt the lingering glances of Stormtroopers as we paraded through the halls. They probably wondered who I was and why I was there, since I didn't look like much of a Jedi anymore. Another wave of dread crashed into my mind—this time it brought on a bout of nausea.

Pax, a voice in my mind said, don't fear. Fear is a path to the Dark Side.

Forcefully slowing my breathing, I worked to relax my mind and body. "Don't fear," I told myself in a whisper. "Don't fear."

There is no chaos, there is harmony.

"What?" Ben said from behind.

Turning halfway, I shook my head and muttered, "Nothing."

A crushing grip appeared on my arm, pulling me into a small alcove behind a power generator of some kind. There was no light in the cramped space, and Ben's face was cast in shadows as he looked down at me.

"You should be afraid, Pax," he warned me. His eyes were desperate if not pleading. "You're putting your life in danger."

Anger festered inside of me, and I tried to stomp it out. "You're putting my life in danger, Ben. You." I glowered up at him.

Ben's hands rested on my shoulders, his touch switching from rough to gentle in a blink. "If you don't turn, he'll order me to kill you." His voice was somewhere between a whine and a whisper.

"Wouldn't be the first Jedi you've killed," I bit out. I wanted to hurt him with my words; I reveled at the pain that flashed across his face. He did this. He did this.

With a flustered sigh, Ben pulled my head forward to rest his forehead against mine. I felt our breath mingle together as I squeezed my eyes shut, standing there stiffly. "Please make the right choice," he murmured. "Please."

I felt my heart harden into stone. The man that I had looked up to, whose attention I had longed for, was now my sworn enemy. Ben pulled back with an apprehensive expression on his face. His mussed hair grazed his eyes.

Although I wanted to scream or to smack him across the face, I merely nodded.

There is no passion, there is serenity.

Our final destination turned out to be a room with the bare minimum in terms of lighting. Although I sensed that the room was large, it felt uncomfortably intimate. Viewports lined the walls, surrounding us with distant stars and systems. Ben pushed me forward by my wrists as my eyes slowly adjusted to the dim lighting.

When I reached out with the Force, my senses became overwhelmed by the strong presence of the Dark Side. So strong, in fact, that I had to close myself off from it to keep from running in terror.

"Master?" Ben's voice was reverent and timid. "I brought her, like you asked."

"Ah," came a chilling voice.

The shuffling of cloth alerted me to someone's movement just before my eyes caught sight of him. In golden robes, the ancient-looking Sith emerged from the darkness. My stomach clenched at the sight, and I staggered backwards until my back bumped into Ben's chest.

"The Jedi with the purple lightsaber," the Sith continued. A sneer appeared on his face as his bloodshot eyes raked over me. He stopped a few feet away, holding his misshapen chin in his hand speculatively. "Kylo Ren has told me a great deal about you."

My heart hammered against the inside of my ribcage as I struggled to control my breathing. "Wh-Who is Kylo Ren?" I asked.

A bark of a laugh echoed throughout the room. "Kylo Ren killed Ben Solo," the Sith drolled.

The sudden dryness in my mouth felt like sand. I couldn't peel my eyes off of the Sith to glance back at Ben, but I wondered what face I would see if I did. "I see," I rasped.

The Sith watching me with an icy, calculating gaze. "Does that not upset you?" he asked.

I strained to keep my face unaffected as I considered my response. Don't fear. "I'm coming to accept his fall to the Dark Side," I replied.

My statement clearly upset him, and his voice became an annoyed growl. "His rise to the Dark Side will spell the end of the Jedi forever. Do you understand that?"

The end of the Jedi forever. My breath left me in a shuddering sigh. "Yes," I breathed.

"However," the Sith continued, "that does not mean the end for you."

When he stepped closer, I stepped back instinctively. I jumped when I collided with Ben again; this time, his hands appeared on my shoulders like durasteel bands. He held me to his chest as the Sith invaded my personal space—so close that I could feel his presence through the Force without reaching out at all. I struggled to maintain eye contact as fear poured through my veins.

"Yes," he breathed, closing his eyes. "I sense your potential for greatness. I sense the Dark Side in you."

His cold fingers traced a line down my face, stopping at my jawline. I couldn't hold back my shriek of discomfort as I wiggled in Ben's grasp.

"I can teach you how to control your fear. It can make you stronger...yes..." His eyes opened, boring into mine like knives. "In time, you will call me 'Master.'"

Pax...don't fear.

Like a puzzle piece snapping into place, I felt my mind come back into focus.

"Never," I spat. I felt Ben flinch behind me. "I don't have the Dark Side in me. And I never will," I stated.

With a sneer, the Sith retreated a few steps away. After a soft clatter from behind, my lightsaber flew into his hand. He looked at me with a gloating expression. "You do, my child."

I opened my mouth to protest, but the sudden burst of my lightsaber silenced me. The purple light illuminated the fissures and wrinkles on his twisted face. He studied the blade as he waved it in an aimless "X" pattern.

"Do you know what it means to have a purple Kyber crystal?" he mused, his eyes reflecting the lavender light.

"It means nothing," I relied, stepping forward. Ben pulled me back, slamming my shoulders into his chest. I stumbled, leaning against him awkwardly.

As if I hadn't said anything, the Sith continued. "It means that you have an affinity for both the Light and the Dark Sides of the Force. It means you are unbalanced." His scarred lips twisted into a smile as he retracted my saber. "It means you will turn."

I shook my head wordlessly. I will never turn to the Dark Side. Even to save myself. "I may not be able to defeat you, but I will never join you," I said.

Snoke lifted a bony hand towards me, piercing me with his soulless gaze. "Let's see about that, shall we?"

Master Luke's brief lesson on mental barriers did nothing to prepare me for the next moment.

It felt as though a swarm of bees had invaded my brain. I felt him there—right there—inside my mind. He peeled through thoughts and memories from the past and the present like pages in a book. As I struggled to push him out of my mind, I felt the Force pushing me down to my knees. I collapsed, grunting with the vain effort to protect my thoughts from him.

He looked at my childhood memories, alight with happiness, ignorant to the chaos that surrounded me. He looked at my mother—the joy of my life in the brief moments we shared together. He looked at my father—the absent caretaker that had been long forgiven. He looked at Master Luke, my inspiration and father figure. And he looked at Ben, my dear friend and undisclosed desire. A sob ripped through my throat as the mental onslaught continued.

Suddenly, it all stopped. When I opened my eyes, I could only see the dark ground beneath me. My knees seemed glued to the floor, and I quickly realized that the Force still held me captive.

"You were wrong, Kylo Ren. She has too much Jedi in her."

My eyes widened when I realized the gravity of those words. He's going to kill me now. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't pull my head up to look at them. I only saw the golden hem of the Sith's robes and Ben's black boots.

"Strike her down," came the order.

I balled my hands into fists with the effort to fight the invisible hold around me. Even if my hands were free, it was too powerful for me to resist alone.

"Ben…," I gasped out blindly, "don't do this!"

"Silence!" the Sith raged. "That name must never be spoken."

A red light burst into my peripheral, and I squeezed my eyes shut. He won't...he won't...he won't. A few deathly silent moments passed as I waited for my life to end. With a screech, the red blade was silenced.

"I need her for information on Skywalker," Ben said softly.

After a moment, his new Master hummed in agreement. "Very well," he said. "But when the time comes, you will finish the deed. For now…"

After the brush of icy fingers at my temple, I collapsed into unconsciousness.

Hey guys, thank you for all the positive reviews! I'm excited to see this story through to the end! -Scarlet