For Love and Honor

There was a fist sized crater within what would be regarded as the Akasuna foyer that had not been there the day before and her grandson was plastering over it and the veiny cracks that radiated from the epicenter, scowling all the while. "Boy, what did you do this time? You've only been married six months… seems a bit early for the end of the honeymoon period," calling him boy was certainly pushing it considering Sasori was 32- even if he had that ridiculously youthful visage.

'I suppose that fig didn't fall far from the tree, as he still goes running about calling his wife ' Girl ' at 25,' Chiyo thought with a small measure of amusement. Though Sasori had called Sakura that from the day he met her, it was Sakura's weekend off from the hospital but she was nowhere in sight. 'If she were about, I'd have a little hope in getting some tea and a few of the biscuits that Sasori made specifically to sate Sakura's sweet tooth.' But given that she could neither see the young woman's friendly face nor hear her voice, Chiyo was quite sure none of that would be forthcoming.

Sasori's hospitality on the best of days was lacking and today was very clearly not one the better ones. "I didn't do anything," he grumbled. Thankfully Sakura had the foresight not to punch the wall with her chakra augmented strength and the damage was easily repaired with some wire mesh, plaster and a good buffing of sand paper when it all finished setting. 'Perhaps rather than a flat surface, something more arabesque...' It would be more time consuming then a simple patching but worthwhile.

Typically speaking, Sasori went out of his way to make sure that Sakura was more than pleased but even he couldn't be perfect in all things at all time and apparently being callous to the plight of some endangered species of desert cat was particularly upsetting for her that day. Or, it could have been that he'd assumed Sakura was more upset than she normally would have been because she was approaching that time of the month. Which was true - and while he'd learned to read those signs, Sasori had yet to learn in his 32 years of life that sometimes a person shouldn't say the quiet parts out loud.

Especially if one didn't want their wife shouting angry gibberish as they punched a wall on their way out of the house. 'In the time that it takes me to patch this wall I'll have figured out a way to smooth things over.' Sasori thought it was better to deal with more...concrete things first. Waiting also came with the added benefit of Sakura cooling down thereby making his own efforts more likely to succeed.

Chiyo looked pointedly at the hole he was filling with thick sludge and Sasori made some huffing noises in annoyance, plaster knife gliding smoothly along the wall as he worked.

Realizing that if he told his grandmother the short of it she'd stop lurking around his house Sasori simply said; "Something about donating 20,000 ryo to Sand-Cats." he left out the part where he told Sakura if they were meant to survive they wouldn't be dying to begin with, evolution existed for a reason. The money was not an issue, he would have said yes even if Sakura wanted to donate 200,000 ryo-But his opinion that it was pointless had been upsetting . 'Money isn't going to stop them from being eaten by caracals,' he'd said at the time and was still certain about it.

It was not what Sakura wanted to hear. She wanted him to be enthusiastic and uncharacteristically compassionate about something he didn't actually care about. 'I should have realized where things were going when her bottom lip started to wobble.' Normally his wife would have constructed something more logical and debate worthy than; but Sasori, the lady at the fundraiser said 90% of them were going to die within ten years!

Which was by far the most ridiculous statistic he'd heard thus far and in hindsight he probably should have pretended to care rather than offering to make her raspberry leaf tea thereby dismissing the entire conversation as pointless hormonal drivel- as Sakura had accused him of doing. "I didn't say that it was pointless."

"I see," his grandmother said, though the look on her face clearly showed she was quite certain that was a rather lopsided explanation of the events and the truth was somewhere in between the things he wasn't saying to her. Sasori loved to hear gossip about other people; he was far less inclined to spill his own personal business. "While you dialogue with yourself , I'll just see myself out." The statement didn't even garner a reaction from him.

Sasori currently found drying plaster and his own thoughts to be more interesting than her departure but that was not exactly a new occurrence in their relationship.

Finding Sakura was not a particularly difficult feat, she was somewhat of a celebrity in Suna for a variety of reasons, the first being that she had become a rather famous Kunoichi due to her apprenticeship to a sannin and later her own undeniable skills both in combat and the medical field. She was currently in the process of creating a smaller unit within the hospital that centered on catering to the needs of children, a rather novel consideration for the world they lived in.

'But one might argue that what's made Sakura particularly famous within these parts is that she married our version of the ' boogie man. ' ' Chiyo's grandson was the type of person parents warned their kids about. A figure of myth and awe, children didn't dare to go near his lawn and if they saw him coming in their direction they scurried the other way much to his delight. 'Actually most people tend to cut him a wide berth.' Which was probably for the best.

The place that her granddaughter-in-law had stormed off to was a pub popular with foreign Shinobi and travelers and while Sakura might have inherited a lot of things from Tsunade she hadn't inherited the Slug-Woman's love of liquor and gambling which made the location a bit odd. 'She's more likely to be found somewhere with books, or maybe one of the greenhouses…' And if she were particularly angry, demolishing some poor training ground.

Sasori, the hypocrite that he was, would probably say that Chiyo was being nosy. 'But I call it having a healthy concern for their marital bliss.' and having great-grandchildren that didn't live 3 days worth of hard travel away. 'Besides that boy is by far a more pleasant person with Sakura than he is without her,' Which meant that making sure things were right at home was beneficial to the harmony of their family and village at large. 'This is simply me doing my due diligence as a grandmother and a patriot.'

Kankurō had once crassly joked that Sasori's less… prickly countenance was because he'd started getting laid regularly. 'A gross oversimplification in my opinion…' And the morning after he'd said those words he woke up in the middle of the desert with numb limbs and a vulture trying to pick out his eyes.

Sakura's peculiar hair color did not exactly endear her to an inconspicuous state of being, especially when she wasn't trying to conceal herself, an act she was very much not committing as she sat at a table in the company of two broad shouldered Iwa-nin. one of which was leaning close enough that it teetered on invasive. They didn't have to be standing to tell they were both of considerable height.

Face flushed and grinning behind the rim of her glass Sakura nodded at something the man sitting next to her said, his head bent close to her own.

It was a very good thing Sasori had stayed home. 'Gaara still barely sleeps as it is, the last thing we need is an inter-village incident such as a series of suspicious deaths to throw us all into the 4th Shinobi War,' Chiyo thought with a shudder. She was too old for that.

Sakura's eyes flitted to the entrance, well trained in keeping aware of her surroundings even if she were mildly tipsy. "Chiyo-bacchan!" She cheered informally and almost upended some of the glasses that were on the table. "That's my grandmother," her words weren't quite slurred as she chattered proudly, looking as though she would climb over the man sitting next to her at any moment.

Having no grandparents of her own or rather none that she could remember made Chiyo the closest Sakura got to knowing what one felt like. 'Shishou just never gave off that vibe…' Maybe it was because of her young face but Tsunade always felt like a second mother or a cool older aunt. 'At least when she wasn't kicking my ribs in or showering me with wood splinters.' There were plenty of people in the world who complained or outright hated their inlaws but that had never been Sakura's own experience.

"Hello Dear," Chiyo eyed the companions Sakura had managed to gain in what was at most a few hours but likely far less. While her grandson was certainly… exceptional in a lot of ways he had not exactly popped into the world with the uncanny ability to make other people feel worthless with a single look, that was simply a family trait he'd perfected. 'As for the conniving, scheming, manipulative nature? Well, who can say?' She mused, a false smile settling over her face even as her eyes shot daggers at the Iwa-nin on Sasori's behalf.

"I'm surprised to see you in such a place." Chiyo admitted as she approached the table. "Who are your…friends?" and she used the term rather loosely.

"There was a deal; you buy a specialty drink and tempura and gyoza are half off!" She'd eaten a lot of tempura. "And these two… this one is Yogore," She pointed to the man next to her, "And that one is Gankai." He sat across from her looking rather bored. "They came over to ask me a few questions since this is their first time in Sunagakure," And they had bought her a drink or two along the way.

The two of them had the worst sort of trifecta working for them; young, dumb and full of what was most likely ill-founded pride and Chiyo could see it at a glance. "I see."

In Sakura's opinion Yogore and Gankai were terribly friendly for Shinobi, although that wasn't a complete aberration in her experience. Lee was like that and though she had only met him once or twice, Killer B could be quite sweet too. 'Naruto's not too different either.' Even if he was informal to the point of being rude, aloof was not something people would regard the Jinchuuriki as being. 'But for every one of them there are about a dozen Sasuke's…'

Chiyo squinted at the man-Gankai, until he took the hint and scooted over enough for her to take a seat. "How helpful of you, I hope you told them that Suna offers guides and information at the gate check...for future reference." All they wanted was an excuse to talk to a pretty girl and more if they could get it. 'Too bad they picked a very unavailable one,' her hands were left folded pleasantly on the table. " I saw the wall, would you like to tell me about the Sand-Cats? I promise to listen better than Sasori."

Those words seemed to invoke something in Sakura, she gasped and smacked the palm of her right hand onto the table. "He- That jerk didn't listen at all! Those cats are an important part of the desert ecosystem, they keep rodent and snake populations in check all throughout Kaze-No-Kuni!"

Sakura wasn't even going to mention that at some point after she'd begun to rant about how he should care more about the world around him, Sasori had suddenly dropped the hook knife he'd been looking over while she made her case and said he would go make tea.

Raspberry leaf tea. Something they both knew she only drank during her period, or maybe the days leading up to it. 'I am not PMS-ing!' Although it might have been around that time. "I just don't want my, our future children to grow up in a world where a species went extinct because we didn't do anything…I never got to see a brachiosaurus!" She sniffled, leaving the people around her to wonder what some megafauna that died off about a million years ago had to do with anything. "Sasori can be so…" she trailed off because ' mean' didn't quite sound right.

"Wait, wait… Sasori as in Akasuna no Sasori?" Yogore recognized the name as belonging to a former Kage and high ranking ninja in his current bingo book-an entry that included the words; flee on sight . 'How great can he really be after stepping down from his position? What can you expect from someone who deals in poison and dolls…' It was a cowardly way of fighting in his opinion.

"Yes, the very same. He's my grandson." Chiyo didn't have to fake the pride in her voice like she did the doddering smile. For all his faults and eccentricities he was a genius, even if he was one with a rather loose sense of ethics and morality. He'd taken so well to her training as a child and quickly improved upon all that he was taught by leaps and bounds. 'And contrary to popular belief he is not with honor of his own.' although that too could be considered a bit... skewed when compared to most other people.

"He's your brother? I thought you were from Konoha…" Gankai blinked in the bar's dim lighting, still trying to figure out what it was about the pretty woman sitting across from him that nagged at his memory. 'Something about her forehead…' Maybe he'd had too much to drink after all, but it didn't stop him from chugging the last of the beer in his mug and gesturing to a passing waitress for a refill all around. As it turned out the old lady next to him preferred stuff of the harder variety; Habushu to be exact. 'That stuff has a whole snake in the bottle…' he shuddered.

Both Chiyo and Sakura laughed. "My brother? No! He's my husband." Because she had been sitting on the side that lined up with the wall her left hand had been more or less hidden but now, as if to punctuate the point that she was married Sakura held it up to show off the band and the red stone centered within it.

Diamonds are too conventional, Everyone uses them, it's unoriginal. Sasori had said . 'And he never could abide by something like that.' Sakura thought in amusement, admiring the way the darkly colored gem seemed to drink in the light. 'I've got no complaints.' She was somewhat surprised that the two Iwa-nin didn't know that she was married. Sasori might have preferred to stay in the shadows but that didn't make him any less famous and she wasn't exactly a nobody herself. 'I mean it was basically the closest ninja's have to a celebrity wedding.'

At least until Naruto got married or something. That event would probably have a whole contingent of representatives from every hidden village and even civilian ones.

"You married that guy?" Yogore's laughter was loud and shook Sakura in her seat. "What are you a saint?"

Sakura was not unused to comments like that, even if she didn't particularly like being put on a pedestal when compared to her husband. 'We're good at different things.' She happened to be better with people than he was but if it came to killing or getting a handle on a crisis and making the difficult decisions without agonizing over them Sasori would outperform her. "Not quite." she said at last.

Yogore grinned, head ducking in close to the kunoichi's. "Must be difficult...I hear he's only like 5'6."

Chiyo watched as Sakura rolled her eyes at the commentary. It wasn't the first time someone had made fun of Sasori's height.

"I'm not sure what his height has to do with anything..." Sakura took a sip of her melon flavoured cocktail, spilling some with a start when she felt a hand sliding up her leg. It was shock that kept her from lashing out right away.

"Short Man Syndrome and all… plus it just stands to reason that he'd be small down below is all." Yogore continued on, ignoring the looks his partner was shooting his way.

Gankai,the smarter of the two dragged a palm over his face. "Whoa…" he began, voice lost as his partner continued on.

"I hear he enjoys death a little too much, if you know what I mean." Yogore's nose was almost against her ear.

Sakura looked down at her lap where Yogore's hand still groped her leg, fingers edging the inside of her thigh. The corner of her eye twitched as she set the glass in her hand back down with a clack. ' I cannot believe this idiot… ' And he was insulting her husband and coming onto her infront of her grandmother by marriage. It wasn't just a single insult, it was a trifecta. "I'm sorry, but what are you trying to say about my husband ?" Her hand dropped to lay over the palm gripping her thigh, fingers digging into the man's knuckles with a pop. She might have been drunk, but she wasn't that far gone.

Chiyo took a loud sip of the liquor she'd ordered, most of the snake venom was degraded by the alcohol and the rest would be dissolved in the stomach but it still left her tongue and face with a distinct tingly feeling. 'I should probably stop this before it gets worse.' Because so far it didn't seem like Yogore's sense of self preservation had kicked in and she could see the storm brewing in Sakura's eyes.

'But it does this old woman's heart good to see how much she loves him.' In her opinion Sasori had phenomenal luck in that regard. 'This fool isn't wrong about her being a saint of sorts.' There had never been a lot of people concerned with Sasori's defense, most people found themselves busy defending themselves against him. If she hadn't seen what type of person Sakura was with her own eyes all those years ago she too would have been confounded by the match up. 'The opposite to him in all the ways she needs to be and just similar enough that they have things in common.'

"I'm saying that he's a creep and I can't believe a girl like you married him." Being drunk might have meant he didn't know when to shut up but it also meant his sense of pain was dulled. "I mean the guy likes to play with corpses, I can't imagine he'd be very warm...not like me. And Babe, I guarantee you I am packing below ."

It occurred to her then that they hadn't been nice because they were nice ...or at least Yogore hadn't been, he'd been kind because he probably wanted to sleep with her. Gankai slunk lower in his seat when Sakura fixed him with a venomous look.

"He might not be tall, his world view is all out of whack, and he's a misanthrope who probably wouldn't care if 80 percent of the population got wiped out so long as it didn't bother him but he's good to me ." And really she supposed that was what mattered at the end of the day-Sakura could care enough about the world for the both of them. "And I'll have you know he's got a huge dick, so there!" She shoved him straight out of the booth and into a passing ninja from Kiri, the drinks he'd been carrying spilled right of his hand and crashed to the floor, glass and ice mixing together.

The proclamation had been loud enough that even the bartender had heard, surprise filtering across the woman's face as she missed a pour and spilled whiskey all over the bartop. 'That is more than I ever needed to know about Akasuna no Sasori.'

Sakura was half out of her seat when Chiyo fixed her with a look that made her still. 'We really don't want to cause a miniature war within a bar...' Although it might have been too late to stop.

A hush fell over the bar. Anyone with a basic grasp of history knew there was bad blood between Kiri and Iwa and so it was no surprise that the hulking 7 foot man Yogore had been thrown into took offense. "You damn Iwa-nin have no manners! It's always been this way with you bastards since the second war!"

"Like someone from Kiri has any room to talk," A Kunoichi from Kumo sitting at the bar shouted. "I mean you fuckers were slaughtering your own academy kids just 20 years ago!" a few of the people around her whistled and hooted at the proclamation but in a few quick strides the ninja from Kiri was in her face, or rather he was sneering down at the woman from Kumo with his superior height, and then she kicked him in the gut. The act knocked her bar-stool into some someone else's who retaliated by kicking her in the back and into the man she'd just assaulted.

Yogore had regained his footing and turned on Sakura, jabbing a finger in her direction. "You Konoha bitch, you people wanna talk about problem villages...your lot are always so uppity and self righteous!" His face had turned a dark red for a variety of reasons, the top two being rage and alcohol. There was a murmur of agreement from a few groups in the bar.

"You were the one who wanted to fuck this uppity Konoha bitch." Sakura mumbled against the rim of her cup. It was going to take more than insulting her birth village to bring her into the fray.

Chiyo supposed that it would be in everyone's best interest if things deescalated. "There was a time I would have agreed on the whole self-righteous business…:

"Shut up you old toad lookin' lady! Everybody knows Suna is just Konoha's dog." Yogore sneered, uttering the words that more of less sealed his beat down. "Your village couldn't make it on its own so you had to cozy up to someone better than you. Actually, when I think about it I guess it is no surprise you married a guy like that, you probably spread your legs for some political marrai-" He didn't get to finish.

Sakura had pulled the table out of the wall it was anchored to and threw it at him. The dishes and glasses, even the salt and pepper that had been on the table flew across the room pelting patrons near and far.

The bartender, who had a well developed sense for trouble had long since realized things were about to go down and was hunkered behind the counter as she spent some time cursing the decision she made to open a bar in a hidden village. 'What the hell was I thinking? I should have become a veterinarian like my mom told me…'

It was really bad business to imbibe one's own stock, especially during operational hours but that didn't stop her from drinking rum straight from the bottle. In her experience there were three paths the rest of the night would take; they would all wear themselves out, the local police would show up, or maybe some passing, sober Jōnin would intercede. 'Either way the best thing for a civilian like me is to stay the hell out of it…' At the very least she'd have a story to tell when it was over and it would also serve to remind her that she really needed to hire security. 'Thank the gods for insurance.'

"You can say a lot of things about me," Sakura said, rising to stand on her seat. "And my village but when you run your mouth about my grandmother and my marriage for
a second time...Well, I only have two cheeks to turn and I'm all out."

Even before her proclamation the bar had descended into chaos as a drunken rehash of wars past and old village rivalries began to play out. In Sakura's case, it was all about familial honor and very personal payback as she vaulted into a kick aimed straight for Yogore's nose. It was to the benefit of everyone involved that her super strength took conscious will power and well timed chakra, otherwise he and everything behind and below him would have been decimated when the blow made contact.

That didn't mean it hurt any less when her heel missed a few inches and hit the side of Yogore's cheek bone instead.

"Oh no." Chiyo sighed, her drink had gone flying with the table and she was suddenly very thirsty. Meanwhile Gankai blinked stupidly at where the table had once been, the mug he'd been about to set down meeting nothing but air.
Yogore rebounded from the kick faster than expected and now that Sakura's face was in the light the purple mark in the center of her forehead was clear to see. "Wait a second," he sluggishly dodged a blow and her fist hit the bar, splintering wood and breaking the skin of her knuckles. "You're the disciple of one of those sennin!" The exact one escaped his brain.

" Sannin ." Sakura snarled the correction, flexing her hand. It stung but she didn't heal it, finding the act to be a waste of Chakra.

The woman from Kumogakure paused, her elbow cocked back to deliver another blow to the Kiri-nin she had pinned beneath her thighs. Though in Chiyo's opinion he looked to have been enjoying the attention. "A Sannin? One of them killed my grandfather!" Or maybe it had been one of their students, she couldn't remember the details but she knew she was supposed to be pissed about it. She forgot all about the man she'd been about to deck and advanced on Sakura instead.

Sakura opened her mouth to reasonably point out that whatever Tsunade, or one of her Shishou's teammates had done 30 years ago had nothing to do with her but Yogore took advantage of the distraction and sucker punched her in the side of the head hard enough to make spots flutter across her vision momentarily. The urge to use Chakra to collapse the whole building grew. In the time that it took her to shake the hit off she'd been grabbed by the front of her shirt by the Kumo kunoichi and thrown to the floor right next to the guy from Kiri who was finally picking himself up.

There was glass digging into Sakura's back and legs, but she paid very little mind to it as she scuffled with the other woman across the ground.

"Dude!" Yogore snapped, taking his eyes off Sakura momentarily to glare Gankai's way. "Get in on this." His ankle got kicked by the pink haired woman hard enough to make it pop and buckle even as the Kumo-nin attempted a choke hold on her.

"Uh..." Gankai looked on with a grimace. 'If I say no is that considered an act of insubordination?' He'd just wanted to drink something cold and sit across from a pretty girl, not end his night beating one up…'or getting beat up by one,' He thought, watching as Sakura flipped the woman from Kumo over her shoulder and back into the man from Kiri as she rolled away from a kick.

That didn't gain her an ally; instead she ended up facing a three way alliance, at which Kiri had decided they were going for blood and had pulled a short blade. "Oh come on!" Sakura dodged as elegantly as someone who still rather tipsy could, waist pivoting to avoid a mean slice of the knife aimed at her midsection. It missed but cut through part of her shirt in the process.

Things had apparently gotten a little more serious.

There was little doubt in Chiyo's mind that Sakura would win even if the whole bar turned against her but that didn't mean she wanted to see her outnumbered and stuck between 3 factions. 'Well, that is what allies are for.' She thought, stretching out her fingers and allowing their invisible threads to take hold of the man sitting next to her. "Looks like you'll be joining the fight after all my lad." she cackled.

Gankai with his beer still in hand wandered into the fray utterly confused and smacked his mug, beer and all against Yogore's head. "Sorry Bro!" His movements were stiff as he tried to fight against whatever was moving him only to find that he couldn't.

Sakura grinned when she caught onto the plot, she could have decimated everyone in the bar and everything with a very large radius whether she were tipsy or drunk off her ass but she was exercising a massive amount of restraint. 'I mean I really don't feel like murdering these guys during peacetime. Especially when Gaara will catch most of the blow back and I would feel really bad during family dinners having to look him in his sad panda eyes, knowing it was my fault he got even less sleep.'

Several other fights have broken out across the room and the floor was a mess of broken glass, and Sakura found herself having to navigate in between those scuffles as she dodged this way and that. She was getting sick of playing around the longer things went on especially after someone employed a fire jutsu and the liquor puddling the floor ignited and set one of her sandals ablaze. She simply kicked it off in Yogore's direction, cursing the fact she was more or less in civilian clothing and they were not flame retardant.

The fact that there was a fire spreading across the floor and no one seemed interested in putting it out or even acknowledging its existence was proof enough that things had gone way too far. It was one thing to pull a knife on her, it was another to destroy some poor civilian's livelihood. Arson, accidental or otherwise was Deidara's thing.

"I've had enough of trying to play nice." But Sakura really didn't want to add attempted arson to the list of possible charges she might be facing and set about extinguishing that threat first, trusting Chiyo to guard her back via her unwitting puppet. There was a fire extinguisher in the back of the bar and she deftly hopped over the counter, mumbling an apology to the bartender as she went.

The fire went out quickly under a stream of foam but that didn't stop her from blasting the rest of it in the face of the woman from Kumo and throwing the empty canister at the knife-happy man from Kiri as Gankai continued to babble apologies, leg sweeping out and hooking the Kumo Kunoichi's ankle. The move sent her face first into the bar top and she stayed slumped over it.

'This is really all his fault.' Sakura's eyes narrowed in on Yogore. She'd just wanted to eat tempura and ruminate on all the ways Sasori was wrong. She hadn't wanted someone else to insult her husband, make gross advances, insult her grandmother and her marriage. 'And then he had to open his stupid mouth and start a riot.' She knew that she was slower than usual thanks to the alcohol and that she could have purged the effects by boosting her metabolism but there was already such a great disparity between her and them it almost made her feel like she was beating on a bunch of Genin.

Sakura didn't try anything fancy, kneeling on the bar top as she jabbed her fingers into the elbow of the Kiri-nin, the pressure to his joint made his hold stutter and she caught the knife before it hit the ground. A flick of her wrist and the blade pinned Yogore to a wall by the collar of his vest, a thin trickle of blood running from his neck. A little more drunk and a little less careful on her part and he could have very well been dead. Her fist finished off the man from Kiri, his body dropping to lay at the feet of the Kumo-Kunoichi he'd been fighting with earlier.

The knife she'd pinned Yogore to the wall with had been thrown with enough force that it had sunk down to it's hilt, holding him fast in place. Sakura stalked across the floor, watching with satisfaction as he wiggled about in a vain attempt to escape. "So… Anything else you'd like to say?" Her knee slid between his legs threateningly, surprised to find that he apparently enjoyed the entire ordeal. It was just another thing he did that deeply annoyed her that night. 'Gross.'

Gankai, released from Chiyo's control flopped back on his bottom, muscles already aching from being used in such an unwilling capacity. "I am never drinking again." And he was never taking another mission with Yogore for that matter either. He wasn't worth the trouble.

Yogore was still grinning, completely mistaking her closeness for a sign of sudden interest rather than the threat that it was. Sighing to herself Sakura caught the crux of his problem in a bruising grip, squishing until the blush that spread across the Iwa-nin's face turned to something alarmingly dark. He made a noise high pitched enough to make her grimace.

"Oh no…" Gankai whimpered and flopped over onto his side, clutching his own crotch sympathetically. "That's just not right…" he said, watching his partners eyes roll up and his body go limp.

Sakura rolled her eyes, no amount of shaking her hand would make her feel less disgusted, not until it was well washed. "He deserved that and more. When he wakes up be sure to tell him he is definitely smaller." And all the icing he would have to do later wouldn't make it any better.

Chiyo hummed and dropped a bunch of ryo on the counter-It wouldn't cover all the damages but it was terribly generous. 'If need be I'll have more sent over later,' she mused, smiling pleasantly as she looped arms with the rosette. "We'd best get going dear, could you imagine if Sasori had to bail his poor old Grandmother and his wife out of jail? He'd probably sneer and say something like; And you thought I would turn out to be the criminal in this family." And gods knew he'd never let them live it down.

"I don't think he's really the type to pay someone's bail," Sakura said, missing her shoe as soon as they stepped out onto the street. "Black mail, sure. Stage a jailbreak? Absolutely…" She stopped in the middle of the road, eyes growing wide. "We can never tell him about this." The first being that he was vindictive enough to go after the people involved, the second being...Her cheeks turned pink. "This night never happened!"

The conciliatory patting Chiyo gave to her arm felt a little condescending.

"As you say dear." Frankly the old woman found it absolutely precious that Sakura thought such an event could be hidden from her grandson of all people. 'He has an insatiable need to know everyone's business.' And especially his wife's. 'She might have a day if she's lucky before he knows about the entire incident.'

They were only a block away when Sakura noticed the local police force rushing by and did her absolute best to look completely innocent which in Chiyo's opinion made her look ten times as guilty as she actually was. 'Of course the fact that she looks like she got put through a shredder doesn't help.' Nor did the smell of booze staining her clothes and it only took one sniff for one of the more intrepid Jōnin to stop them.

"There have been some reports of a fight over on Chimata, I don't suppose you have any idea about that?"

Sakura glanced off to the side. "I uh…" It was one thing to lie to an enemy combatant or even a person of ill intent, it was another to subvert the law of her village just to skirt getting into trouble and so she found herself quibbling with the morality of her current dilemma.

With certainty it could be said that the Kazekage clan enjoyed a lot of luxuries and had more leeway than the average citizen but every now and then as in most cases there was always someone out to buck the trend. Sometimes it was some scheming council member or in their current case some poor fool on a power trip, thinking he saw a prime opportunity to get one over on at least a member of an illustrious family.

To say that Sakura was universally loved throughout Sunagakure would have been erroneous, there were plenty of people who decried the fact that a foreigner had married into what was more or less a royal family and it did not matter that the love match came with a multitude of benefits for the village. 'Of course they keep quiet about their grumbling, as well they should.' Chiyo thought, wondering if that old trick of pretending to die would drive him off.

'She may have completely revitalized Suna's hospital structure and even if she is in the process of training a squad so that there are more medical-nin in circulation, there are some people who can't find a single shred of good in anything.' all that and the inter-village marriages went a long way to cement ties between the once enemy territories. To be fair there was probably a time in her life where Chiyo too would have scoffed at the thought of anyone in her family marrying someone from Konoha but time and exposure to new realities had a way of changing a person.

Finding her current situation to be more rigorous than the bar fight she'd just exited Sakura sucked in a breath to begin what was sure to be a rather long winded, rambling explanation of how the bar fight was totally not her fault. "I didn't-"

"Is there a reason you are harassing my wife?" The words came out like the hiss of some venomous creature waiting to strike, which for anyone who knew Sasori or of him would agree that the comparison was more than apt.

There were moments in life where one just had a sense that something was underfoot, for no particular reason at all and that feeling had been stabbing at the back of Sasori's head for the last hour, enough so that he'd paused in etching the geometric designs into the last corner of the wall. It'd been well over an hour and a half since Sakura had left and in his opinion that was more than enough time spent apart.

'The woman I love is out there caring about something stupid which means that I have to pretend to care too.' Sasori had committed himself to appearing more sympathetic- or at least trying his best to appear that way. Which was in retrospect what he should have done in the first place. It was with that mindset that he'd found himself on the hunt only to find her in the middle of the street, looking utterly horrified as she stood face to face with some officer who was clearly fresh out of his training and looking to make a name for himself.

The officer went pale and his head turned oh so slowly. "I, uh, uhm…" It was his turn to stutter and fumble about nervously for a reply. Sasori was like an urban legend except he was very, very real and looking like he was about to murder someone. He'd grown up on stories that if someone in the village went missing or if there were some suspicious death it might very well have been at the hands of the man before him.

"I didn't realize stuttering was taught as a secondary language at our academy." Sasori stared unblinkingly, well aware that the prolonged period he could go without the microsecond shuttering of his eyes was considered unsettling by the weak willed. "Spit it out already this village doesn't pay you to stand around looking stupid, if it did we'd be bankrupt."

Watching the officer's mouth as it performed an admirable replication of the fish his grandmother and great uncle angled as their preferred pastime Sasori continued on accidically. "Stop wasting time; speak or leave."

There was an audible gulp from the young man's throat as he pointed nervously at Sakura's feet. "I just, uh...wanted to know where her shoe was but its not my business if someone wants to wander around barefoot or anything!" There was actually a public ordinance prohibiting such actions but he was not about to mention that to Akasuna no Sasori. He laughed nervously and backed away.

"I think you just ended that guy's whole career," Sakura tsked, noting the dejected slump of the young officer's shoulder just as he turned a corner.

"Good." He'd already seen that she was a mess when he'd happened upon them in the street but now that one problem had been squashed Sasori had time to truly be furious about what he saw. Sakura's face was scuffed and bruised, there was a cut through the waist of her shirt and what looked to be glass ground in her knees and shins. "Where is your shoe?" The question came as he reminded himself that grinding one's teeth was a horrible thing to do.

When he inquired about her missing footwear what Sasori had really wanted to know was everything but Sakura simply looked down at her foot. "I dunno." Which was true, she really didn't know where it was anymore. 'And I am not telling him I lost it in a bar fight defending his honor of all things.' Instead she looked towards Chiyo with imploring eyes.

There was just one tiny problem. Her partner in crime was already down the street waving farewell to her. "This old woman needs a nap...you youngsters ought to kiss and makeup!"

Standing there pouting and looking utterly betrayed, Sakura turned back to Sasori. "I want to go home." She didn't get one step before she was lifted into his arms. "I can walk!" Came the annoyed protestation but she didn't try to wiggle away, instead she looped her arms around his neck for stability.

"You're missing a shoe and you have glass in your legs," Sasori also noticed she smelled like she'd been rolling around in a distillery which gave him some indication as to where things had occurred. "Which I'm still waiting for an explanation of."

"It's embarrassing I don't want to talk about it." The reply was grumbled against his chest, Sakura fisted the scarf he was wearing in her hand as she inhaled the spicy scent of cardamom and wood. Even with her added weight he still moved with liquid grace and darting speed, they were home in virtually no time at all but he still didn't release her when they crossed the threshold. "Oh, you changed the wall," And fixed the hole she'd left.

"Yes." Sasori removed his sandals without the use of his hands and still managed to place them perfectly in their proper place.

"It's nice," and it was only that way because she'd hit it on her way out the door. "But I'm sorry for breaking it before."

This was the part where Sasori supposed he should apologize, or at least roughly approach the area in which Sakura would consider it as good as one since the words I'm sorry seemed to be suspiciously missing in his mental dictionary. "I should not have dismissed your concerns so lightly." The stairs were climbed and he finally set her down on the edge of the tub after going through a few open doors in the process. He stopped the tub and left it to fill once he'd adjusted the temperature correctly.

"But you still don't care about Sand-Cats do you?"

"Not even a little bit," Sasori admitted with the shrug of his shoulders. "I care about you and you care about them, which is why while you were gone I went over some of the materials you left behind and I'm quite sure that organization is a scam." He busied himself with removing the one shoe Sakura did have left and tossed it into the trash. 'It's worthless without its mate.'

There was a scoff from Sakura. "What? Who would make a fake conservation association?" She hissed when one of his fingers prodded a particularly large piece of glass embedded in her shin. Nothing was going to get healed until at least the bigger pieces had been picked out. 'That's going to be a pain, literally.'

"Someone looking to make easy money." Sasori kept the additional comment about bleeding hearts being easy prey to himself. "I looked at the data and found that it didn't make sense but perhaps they are just inept with numbers. Did you look at them yourself?"

Sakura hadn't. She'd mentioned wanting to donate before actually looking things over and then threw the papers at him after the whole tea-incident. "No, but if you say it's so then I'll believe it," but she would be looking over things herself later. 'I mean if there is a scam going on I have a societal obligation to report that.' Also a personal vendetta against a bunch of scumbags but that was less important in her mind. She blinked as Sasori pressed a slip of paper into her hand. "This is a donation slip." and it was for a rather generous sum.

"Mhm, In your name to some small wildcat foundation-its accredited, I checked." It made them trustworthy enough for him to bother with. Sasori hooked a finger into the long strip that had been cut through her shirt and tugged. "Now will you tell me about this?" Sakura snuggling into his neck was not going to distract him.

"And deprive you of your favorite pastime? Never." And by passtime Sakura meant snooping. "I'm sure you'll sleuth it out all on your own," but preferably without all the details like names and what had been said. Her nose edged against his cheek and Sasori paused in undoing the knots that held her qipao shut, her sense of style had more or less remained the same over the years. 'You won't catch me wearing one of those parkas.' No offense meant to Chiyo and Ebizo but even Sasori hadn't worn them past the age of eight. They were unfashionable.

The noise Sasori made was almost a laugh. "Oh Darling Girl, I'm afraid you've got things mixed up." His hand coiled in her hair, tangling in the tresses. "You should know by now that you would be my favorite diversion. Spies and sleuthing are fourth on the list." Preceded by puppetry and poison, the two subjects he considered to be his production of art. The way that she was looking at him through the fall of her dusky lashes, pink still staining her cheeks drove him forward and what was meant to be the simple press peck soon became the scraping of his teeth over her tender bottom lip. The action eked a whimpering sigh from Sakura and the insistent press of his hungry mouth stole the breath from her parting lips. Sasori's tongue pressed forward, darting out to slide against her own.

It's the noises Sakura made that were intoxicating to Sasori, not the faint taste of liquor that still clung to her, the breathy moans and low-toned pleas he skillfully drew from her. Years of courtship and a recent marriage did little to slake his desires. The hand that wasn't using her hair to slant her head had found its way beneath her shirt, thumb pressed against a pert nipple through the lace of her bra. Having her as he did would always be in Sasori's mind one of the greatest achievements of his life and it was as if he sought to prove it with every touch.

There was a slickness between her thighs that Sakura recognized as having very little to do with arousal. 'Fuck.' An agitated nose escaped her as she pulled away from her husband's kiss, leaning her forehead against his. "I'm bleeding." She wouldn't have minded a continuance if it weren't for the pain creeping through her abdomen. Her hands stopped edging the hem of his tight shirt further up his torso, pouting to herself at the awful timing.

Sasori's eye's slithered back down to her legs, fingers still splayed against her breast. The wounds he was looking at were more or less dry. "I suppose we should deal with the glass first." and the tub was about to overflow. His hand reluctantly fled its place to shut off the water.

"Yes and no." Sakura laughed and then grimaced as the cramps spiked their way through her. "I didn't mean my legs were bleeding."

"Ah." His eyes moved higher, glancing at the cradle of her hips. "I don't mind." It was very hard to be disgusted by periods of all things considering his line of work and knowledge of human anatomy. He wasn't going to gloat that he'd been right about the timing.

"Of course you don't." Sakura set about undoing the knot closures of her shirt. If it weren't for current pain she was in it might have been a different story. She was personally mortified by the mess that ensued but he'd always been completely unbothered. 'Unlike that time Naruto was messing around in my pack and found pads. He acted like it was the end of the world and he needed to amputate his hand,' Eighteen year old boys were not known for their maturity.

Sasori lingered for a few more moments to admire the view of his wife undressing, fingers desiring to touch what his eyes were permitted to see so easily. "I'll be back shortly." There were a few things he had to gather; Tweezers, topical anesthetic because while Sakura would insist she could just turn her pain receptors on and off at will, messing with the body's natural functions was meant to be a last result not a default option.

He was gone only ten minutes, having spared some time to brew the tea he'd offered her earlier that day. "Stop that." Sakura, submerged in water up to her neck with her legs hanging over the edge of the tub was digging the bigger shards of glass out with her nails, water running red as she hissed in pain not yet having numbed her nerves.

There was a pained grunt that coincided her pulling it loose. "The faster they come out the faster I can seal up the wounds." Between the cramps and the waning effects of the alcohol she was in for a miserable night as it was. Sakura didn't want to be up all night, hunched over extracting little bits of glass out of her body. She dropped the shard in the pro-offered bowl Sasori had brought back with him.

"Even if you can heal the damage there is no reason to mutilate yourself just for expediency." Sasori grumbled and pressed the warm cup into her hand. "I'll pull them out, drink that." Which had been his plan from the start. Long fingers trailed a path down the exposed length of her thigh, stopping just short of where the damage began.

Mumbling something that sounded suspiciously like tyrant against the mug in her hands, Sakura blew on the steaming liquid as she gingerly sipped it, finding that he'd added enough honey to remove the bitter taste. Something cold and tingly was sprayed over her legs and her eyes focused on the unmarked bottle. "...Are you using me as a guinea pig?" She couldn't feel the tweezers prodding at her even though she could see him working them, catching the shiny splinters with neat precision. The face Sasori made at her was as close to pouting as he got.

"I resent how careless you make me sound." The shards he'd dug out made plinking noises as they were dropped into the metal bowl. "I rigorously test everything before I use it on you." Usually on Deidara. Sasori did not leave things to chance, especially when it came to her. Poisons were his forte, they came naturally to him and the way his nature dictated but he had in the last 5 years or so begun to branch out into more beneficial concoctions if only to try his hand at something new. "Does it hurt?"

The tea and the heat of the bath were making her sleepy. "Not at all….Have I mentioned how much I love you today?" She'd have to ask him about what he'd used on her later.

"I don't need words to know and you shouldn't either... but since I know you like to hear it; I love you too." There was a brief kiss to an undamaged portion of her leg as he considered how paltry those words were compared to what he actually felt. Trying to describe those feelings with speech always made Sasori feel clumsy in ways he was unused to. Telling her that she alone was the person he considered irreplaceable, above even himself, that she had long been the focus of all that he did, the very center of his universe sounded melodramatic. 'Even if it is true.' Sasori was simply not a wordsmith, he worked with his hands and physical realities even as he sought to push those limits.

When the last of the glass was removed Sasori shook her awake enough to seal the lesions and do some actual washing in fresh water and then it was off to bed.

She was half-stirred the next morning when her husband slid back under the covers from wherever he'd gone, her form molding into his as their shared warmth chased away the cold air the house was designed to retain throughout the day. "Where'd you go?" The words were slurred by a sleep not quite cast off. She didn't smell breakfast and it still felt awfully early in the morning.

"To pick up eggs," And engage in one of his previously discussed hobbies. "Sakura, can you think of any reason why people were staring at my crotch?" There was undoubtedly a hint of amusement in his tone.

Green eyes flicked open in alarm. "Huh?" Her nose bumped against his as she jerked awake.

Sasori continued on peering at her through his lashes, a wicked smile quirking in the corner of his lips. "Apparently, someone during a bar fight exclaimed that her husband was well endowed and it's been going about the village all morning. I wonder who that could have been…"

"No, no. I'm sure they misheard, what I probably said was more akin to; My husband IS a huge dick. That is a big distinction." Sakura hid the blush by pressing her face against his chest, though it did nothing to conceal the pink of her ears. 'It's just no good for him to get all arrogant about it.' It was exactly what she had wanted to avoid in the first place. Although she supposed it was far too late for that now considering how self-satisfied Sasori looked, laying on his side with his head propped in the palm of his hand.

"Well, this huge dick as you put it is ready to perform anytime."

I can say with all honesty that there are two types of things that are difficult to write, Fight scenes and smut, and between the two fights are waaaaay harder. Which is why this nonsense took so damn long and also why I basically dropped off the face of the earth. I have a process… and the process involves torturing myself by smacking my head into metaphorical walls until I get something done.

Sand-Cats are a very real animal but they are not listed as endangered in real life.

Sasori didn't turn himself into a puppet so he had the luxury to grow another 3-4 inches. Yay him. This story could very easily take place in Stupid With Love's universe, so you can just imagine it as within that future if you like.

Don't ever ask Sakura to be your alibi, she'd fold within minutes.

She's more or less Lawful Good to Neutral good depending on the circumstances. As with all things there are instances where she would defy people in positions of power, like if she thought they were despots or a threat to what she deems "The Greater Good." This is best evidenced by her attempt on Sasuke's life in canon.

Meanwhile Sasori ranges from Neutral to Neutral evil, because ultimately he's out for himself-though he includes Sakura in the realm of "himself".