Okay, so it's still a little short. But I think this gets the message that I wanted to send.
This is it. The story's done after this. But before I let you read it, I have to say this:
Thank you, every single one of you, who are reading this. Some who I know who you are, some who I don't. I really wouldn't have had the patience or encouragement to finish this if it wasn't for you. You have all been amazing to put up with my many delays. And my ramblings at the beginning of the chapters. Your reviews have kept me going, and have picked me up in computer class. THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!!!
And finally, I'm still looking for ideas for a title. If you have any suggestions, please let me know.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Thank you, Gavin, for that, ahem, enlightening speech," Mr. Simpson said from the back of the class on Tuesday. Spinner had just finished his speech on his discovery of spray cheese being the life-changing event. He came and sat down beside me with a grin on his face.
"That was interesting," I whispered. He laughed. In the back, Mr. Simpson finished writing his notes, and looked at the class list.
"Next up, we have Paige Michalchuk," he announced. I stood up. "Take it away, Paige." Shakily, I made my way to the front of the class. I hated big presentations, even thought I had a decent speech written word-for-word in front of me. Dylan and I had stayed up until twelve the night before, trying to make it work. We finally came up with something.
"When I was ten, my grandma got sick," I started, taking a deep breath. "At first we just thought it was the flu, but the doctor told us otherwise." I looked down at my notes, then up at Spinner, then Ashley, then Mr. Simpson. He was waiting for me to continue. My hands shook.
"I. . . it. . ." I looked back at Spinner, then back down at my paper. I folded the paper in half. "The truth is, that didn't really change me, except, some of you may have noticed, it turned me into a bitch." A low murmur broke out across the class. "Sorry Mr. Simpson. What that attitude did to me turned me into a very stupid person, and it led to my life changing event.
"A lot of you probably heard some kind of rumour about me this year. And the unfortunate part is that they're probably true.
"Near the start of this year, I met a guy. He went to another school. He was older, tall, dark, handsome, the whole bit. He was a jock, and I started flirting with him. He invited me to a party. What happened that night changed my life.
"I was supposed to be going out with someone that night, and I bailed on them to spend time with this guy. And the guy who I bailed on showed up at the party. I asked the guy I was with to go somewhere alone. I'm going to skip you the gory details, but when I got up there, we started kissing. And he took it further. And I said stop. And he took it even further." I looked at the expressions on the faces staring back at me. Some looked confused, others looked surprised, two were smirking. "He raped me. So I did the logical thing. I pretended nothing happened, threw out my clothes, took a shower, and didn't talk to the police or see s doctor. Finally, I talked to someone. It was the last person I ever would have expected, after what I'd put her through, but there are some people in this world who are just amazing people, who are willing to put aside their feelings to help you, even if it means putting their own feelings on the line. And she finally got me to talk to a counsellor.
"I had almost gotten to a place where I could deal with what had happened, where I didn't blame myself anymore, and I had to face him again. He told me that I had asked for it, that I had come on to him, and that everyone at the party had seen a girl who wanted it. Even when I had two people, two people that I didn't know cared about me that much, attack this guy, I believed him. But I decided to press charges.
"A week or two later, I talked to a police officer. And a couple of days after that, I started getting calls and e-mails from the guy. So I found a new way to deal with what he had done. I started cutting myself. It started out once, maybe twice, and I thought I could stop. I didn't. I also started going to a support group. And I found out that I wasn't the only one who he had raped." I shook saying the word, but I was no longer speaking to the class. I was speaking to myself, for myself. It was the first time I was acknowledging what had happened. That I had been raped. The words were coming out clearly, and in my head, logically. "So we teamed up. Some group, huh? We all pressed charged. They couldn't really stick on their own. Meanwhile, this guy was dating someone else I knew, and who I didn't like. I still tried to save them from him. But sometimes people need to save themselves. She ended up getting raped. But, she got to a doctor in time. And this time, there was enough to arrest him. But before they got the chance to, he broke into my house.
"I never saw him, and nothing really happened, but I started blacking out after he broke in. Then, literally minutes before he was arrested, he got a hold of me. He. . . well, he did this." I turned my arm around, which I usually kept pressed close to my side, and wiped at the layer of foundation that I had over it. A long, ugly, red scar emerged from underneath the guck. "And then I had a nervous breakdown.
"I was in the hospital for a week, then was back home for two. Another series of events happened, but basically, he only got charged with two crimes. But, we somehow made it to the trial and he got convicted." I wouldn't tell them about the AIDS part. As much as I was reealing about myself, I still wasn't 100% sure that I didn't have AIDS, and in high school, it could be the end of everything. "But not before I went to see him in prison and do what I'd been dying to do for months. I slapped him. I wasn't what I thought was most appropriate, but the prison wouldn't let me bring a knife in. And I'm still hoping that he gets stuck with a 300-pound cell-mate named Bubba who takes care of it for me." The class laughed, some nervously. "I'm not going to say that this has been a good experience. It sucks, and will probably continue to suck for the next several years, if not the rest of my life. But I realized something through this experience. There are bad people in the world. And you're going to have to deal with them at some point or the other. And some people will deal with worse people than others. But there will always be bad people and bad experiences. And when these bad things happen, you learn who really cares about you, and what's really important. Even if you have a very thick skull and it takes forever. There are people who are there for you no matter what our hair looks like, or how big your chest is." Another round of giggles. "And there are things that seem totally unimportant. What is important is that you learn from the experience, and never let yourself be in that situation again. You have to surround yourself with people who love you, and they'll be there for you, no matter what.
"Through this, I did realize that there was someone who cared about me more than I could ever imagine. He was probably the only thing that got me through everything. I screwed up more times than I can count, but he's always been there.
"So how did this change my life? I'd like to say I'm a better person, you know smarter, wiser, prettier, whatever, but I'm probably not. What I learned, most of all, is who really is a true friend, there no matter what." I locked eyes with Ashley, then Hazel. They both smiled. "And who truly loves you, no matter what." I locked eyes with Spinner. He grinned. The class, slowly, one by one, started clapping. I stopped them. I had one more thing to say, then they could cheer or boo, whatever they felt like. Mr. Simpson could fail me for all I cared. "Someone asked me once what it's like to be a rape victim. Maybe there was a time I would have told them. But as someone much wiser than me once pointed out," I smiled at Spinner. "I'm not a rape victim. I'm a survivor."
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
So, what did you think? Like it? Hate it? I am totally open to any constructive criticism. Just let me know! Thank you all! You rock!
This is it. The story's done after this. But before I let you read it, I have to say this:
Thank you, every single one of you, who are reading this. Some who I know who you are, some who I don't. I really wouldn't have had the patience or encouragement to finish this if it wasn't for you. You have all been amazing to put up with my many delays. And my ramblings at the beginning of the chapters. Your reviews have kept me going, and have picked me up in computer class. THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!!!
And finally, I'm still looking for ideas for a title. If you have any suggestions, please let me know.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Thank you, Gavin, for that, ahem, enlightening speech," Mr. Simpson said from the back of the class on Tuesday. Spinner had just finished his speech on his discovery of spray cheese being the life-changing event. He came and sat down beside me with a grin on his face.
"That was interesting," I whispered. He laughed. In the back, Mr. Simpson finished writing his notes, and looked at the class list.
"Next up, we have Paige Michalchuk," he announced. I stood up. "Take it away, Paige." Shakily, I made my way to the front of the class. I hated big presentations, even thought I had a decent speech written word-for-word in front of me. Dylan and I had stayed up until twelve the night before, trying to make it work. We finally came up with something.
"When I was ten, my grandma got sick," I started, taking a deep breath. "At first we just thought it was the flu, but the doctor told us otherwise." I looked down at my notes, then up at Spinner, then Ashley, then Mr. Simpson. He was waiting for me to continue. My hands shook.
"I. . . it. . ." I looked back at Spinner, then back down at my paper. I folded the paper in half. "The truth is, that didn't really change me, except, some of you may have noticed, it turned me into a bitch." A low murmur broke out across the class. "Sorry Mr. Simpson. What that attitude did to me turned me into a very stupid person, and it led to my life changing event.
"A lot of you probably heard some kind of rumour about me this year. And the unfortunate part is that they're probably true.
"Near the start of this year, I met a guy. He went to another school. He was older, tall, dark, handsome, the whole bit. He was a jock, and I started flirting with him. He invited me to a party. What happened that night changed my life.
"I was supposed to be going out with someone that night, and I bailed on them to spend time with this guy. And the guy who I bailed on showed up at the party. I asked the guy I was with to go somewhere alone. I'm going to skip you the gory details, but when I got up there, we started kissing. And he took it further. And I said stop. And he took it even further." I looked at the expressions on the faces staring back at me. Some looked confused, others looked surprised, two were smirking. "He raped me. So I did the logical thing. I pretended nothing happened, threw out my clothes, took a shower, and didn't talk to the police or see s doctor. Finally, I talked to someone. It was the last person I ever would have expected, after what I'd put her through, but there are some people in this world who are just amazing people, who are willing to put aside their feelings to help you, even if it means putting their own feelings on the line. And she finally got me to talk to a counsellor.
"I had almost gotten to a place where I could deal with what had happened, where I didn't blame myself anymore, and I had to face him again. He told me that I had asked for it, that I had come on to him, and that everyone at the party had seen a girl who wanted it. Even when I had two people, two people that I didn't know cared about me that much, attack this guy, I believed him. But I decided to press charges.
"A week or two later, I talked to a police officer. And a couple of days after that, I started getting calls and e-mails from the guy. So I found a new way to deal with what he had done. I started cutting myself. It started out once, maybe twice, and I thought I could stop. I didn't. I also started going to a support group. And I found out that I wasn't the only one who he had raped." I shook saying the word, but I was no longer speaking to the class. I was speaking to myself, for myself. It was the first time I was acknowledging what had happened. That I had been raped. The words were coming out clearly, and in my head, logically. "So we teamed up. Some group, huh? We all pressed charged. They couldn't really stick on their own. Meanwhile, this guy was dating someone else I knew, and who I didn't like. I still tried to save them from him. But sometimes people need to save themselves. She ended up getting raped. But, she got to a doctor in time. And this time, there was enough to arrest him. But before they got the chance to, he broke into my house.
"I never saw him, and nothing really happened, but I started blacking out after he broke in. Then, literally minutes before he was arrested, he got a hold of me. He. . . well, he did this." I turned my arm around, which I usually kept pressed close to my side, and wiped at the layer of foundation that I had over it. A long, ugly, red scar emerged from underneath the guck. "And then I had a nervous breakdown.
"I was in the hospital for a week, then was back home for two. Another series of events happened, but basically, he only got charged with two crimes. But, we somehow made it to the trial and he got convicted." I wouldn't tell them about the AIDS part. As much as I was reealing about myself, I still wasn't 100% sure that I didn't have AIDS, and in high school, it could be the end of everything. "But not before I went to see him in prison and do what I'd been dying to do for months. I slapped him. I wasn't what I thought was most appropriate, but the prison wouldn't let me bring a knife in. And I'm still hoping that he gets stuck with a 300-pound cell-mate named Bubba who takes care of it for me." The class laughed, some nervously. "I'm not going to say that this has been a good experience. It sucks, and will probably continue to suck for the next several years, if not the rest of my life. But I realized something through this experience. There are bad people in the world. And you're going to have to deal with them at some point or the other. And some people will deal with worse people than others. But there will always be bad people and bad experiences. And when these bad things happen, you learn who really cares about you, and what's really important. Even if you have a very thick skull and it takes forever. There are people who are there for you no matter what our hair looks like, or how big your chest is." Another round of giggles. "And there are things that seem totally unimportant. What is important is that you learn from the experience, and never let yourself be in that situation again. You have to surround yourself with people who love you, and they'll be there for you, no matter what.
"Through this, I did realize that there was someone who cared about me more than I could ever imagine. He was probably the only thing that got me through everything. I screwed up more times than I can count, but he's always been there.
"So how did this change my life? I'd like to say I'm a better person, you know smarter, wiser, prettier, whatever, but I'm probably not. What I learned, most of all, is who really is a true friend, there no matter what." I locked eyes with Ashley, then Hazel. They both smiled. "And who truly loves you, no matter what." I locked eyes with Spinner. He grinned. The class, slowly, one by one, started clapping. I stopped them. I had one more thing to say, then they could cheer or boo, whatever they felt like. Mr. Simpson could fail me for all I cared. "Someone asked me once what it's like to be a rape victim. Maybe there was a time I would have told them. But as someone much wiser than me once pointed out," I smiled at Spinner. "I'm not a rape victim. I'm a survivor."
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
So, what did you think? Like it? Hate it? I am totally open to any constructive criticism. Just let me know! Thank you all! You rock!