Disclaimer: Abby, Carter and rest of ER tribe are not mine, never will be yadda yadda yadda

Title: May

Chapter: 1- Standing Waiting Falling

A/N: OK, so I swore to myself when I first started writing fan fiction that I would never start a story before I had completed the one previous. I failed. My previous story Into the Woods is not being disregarded, it is purely on a hiatus. I just feel like at the present moment I am going no where with it. So, hence my brand spanking new baby. OK so it is a Carby!! I would NEVER write anything else. I am really excited about this story, as I feel there are not enough of this particular type out there (decided upon this as I was searching the library that is FF.net just this afternoon). Also, am writing it during study period for exams so I have SOME time on my hands in between sleeping and studying. Also, ER is over (well, on thursday for us english folk), so I am going to be having withdrawal symptoms, and will need something to preoccupy my mind. This is no post season fic, as well, I have yet to know what happens in the finale, although I have my suspicions!! So, as always PLEASE REVIEW! Especially since this is the first chapter and all, I wanna know what you all think. Finally, my apologies for the lengthy A/N!!

Credits: Title to the story is taken from the wonderful Lifehouse song . The titles to each chapter will reflect lyrics from that song. Also, lyrics used from the song by The Beatles.

Summary: Carby. A lengthy story following the due course of a pregnancy and happiness that follows.

- - -

The ER was bursting as usual that morning. Charts were stacking up high on the reception desk, and the board was already overflowing. Patients filled chairs, every one of them either letting slip a hoarse cough, spluttering sneeze or painful groan.

Susan walked briskly over to the admit area as she triumphantly dispo-ed one more patient. Her slight elation was only to be disposed of as soon as Abby smugly handed her another chart.

You're enjoying this aren't you? Susan asked, giving Abby an accusing look through squinted eyes.

Oh, sure! I mean like I'm not snowed under enough either?

Susan retained a hold of the chart as she crossed her arms over her chest, leaning against the desk. Well, it doesn't look like it!

Abby took in her relaxed posture, seated leisurely on a black swing back chair with a cup of coffee directly besides her. Hey, I'm taking a break! It's busy!

Uh, ya think? Susan laughed, looking around pointedly at the manic surroundings. Besides, isn't the lounge more suitable for break-taking? Not out here where you can rub peoples noses in it?!

She chucked. Yeah, well I did pop my head though the door but Pratt and Chen were participating in their monthly make-out session. Kinda made me reconsider.

Hmm, I don't blame you. They really do make you sick don't they?

Abby swung herself round on the chair before pausing to speak.

There was a brief silence as both women pondered over the next topic to bring up in the conversation. Susan was first to speak up.

OK, well, I better go see to, uh... she paused briefly as she consulted the chart in her hands, Mr. Goalber with kidney stones. Oh Abby, how I love you.

Thought you would like it. Have fun!

With that, Susan disappeared down the hallways towards her awaiting patient leaving Abby alone until another familiar face rounded into to the admit area. If she sat here solidly for ten minutes, it would probably be possible, especially on a day like today, that she would come into contact with every person that worked here. It was rather intriguing.

Uh, Abby? Isn't your break over now? Kerry Weaver's distinctive squawk penetrated her ears.

So much for intriguing', she thought. Uh, yeah, just getting back to it Doctor Weaver.

Good, because there's a cast removal in three that needs doing.

Abby rose from her comfortable position in the chair, wincing at the unsettled feeling in her stomach that had been plaguing her for the past couple of days. Stupid stomach bug.

Uh, are you all right Abby? Kerry asked hesitantly, in her awkward tone.

Oh, yeah fine.

Um, OK. Oh, um,do you know where Carter is?

Abby looked around briefly. Um, last time I saw him he was heading to trauma one with an MVA.

Kerry replied briefly before limping off in the direction of the trauma room. Abby watched for a few seconds before sighing, and heading off to remove the cast of her assigned patient.


- - -

The day was beginning to become Abby's day from hell'. The ER showed no signs of slowing down and every patient that did filter through the doors and onto her to see' list ended up being her worst nightmare. The cast removal had turned out to be on a hyperactive eight year old boy, who would not sit still for one minute and had ended up ripping the earring out of her left ear. She had also seen an old man with a pustule she had to drain, and an over-weight woman with a yeast infection. Worst still, the doctors that she had no intentions of wanting to run into always crossed her path, and were not in the best of moods to top it off. The doctors that she did want to see were obviously working in a different hospital to her because she had not seen them all day, or more precisely him all day. She hopped up onto the admit desk, perched by the computer, swinging her legs in a random attempt to amuse herself as she scanned the ER, hoping to catch even a glimpse of him. No such luck.

Abby, this is the second time I have seen you hanging around here aimlessly today. It's busy, we need you working not slacking! Weaver's voice sent shivers down her spine.

Abby took a deep breath. Yes Doctor Weaver, and this is my second break today. Excuse me for...

How do I know you're not lying to me? Kerry asked suspiciously.



Ready for our break? A familiar voice interrupted.

The corner's of Abby's mouth upturned, an action she was unable to control at the sound of his voice. She replied, before turning to Kerry, and smiling smugly, and rather immaturely she noted, before hopping off the desk, and joining her boyfriend as they made their way towards the lounge.

They walked the short distance in silence, the only contact made by Carter placing a hand on the small of her back, as he lead her in his intended direction.

Abby sighed as the door closed shut behind them. She walked over to Carter's seated position on the couch, and collapsed directly besides him.

Thank you for that. She spoke, turning her head to the left to face him.

Carter chuckled. It's ok. It sounded as though you needed some help.

You're my knight in a lab coat.

Carter smiled goofily.

They stayed seated, their heads thrown back against the top of the coach, both exhausted but simply enjoying each other's company. Abby finally reached over blindly, eyes closed, taking a hold of Carter's hand, unable to withstand the reality of not touching him.

So, where have you been hiding out all day? She spoke wearily, as they entwined fingers, rubbing thumbs absently across one another's.

In every place in this god damn building but the same room as you.

Busy days suck.

You're telling me.

They sat in silence once more, before Abby let out a small whine that was almost inaudible.
However, Carter let it go unnoticed.

You ok? He asked, as he rolled his head to the side.

Abby nodded, still not opening her eyes. Mmm, I think I must be getting some stomach bug or something, I've been feeling queazy all day.

Carter continued to look at her. I haven't heard of a stomach bug going around.

They all have to start somewhere Carter. She said almost forcefully.

You want me to take you home? He asked, reaching over to brush a stray strand of hair away that was obviously irritating her as it brushed against her nose.

This time Abby rolled her head to the side, cheek against the coach, and face only inches away from him. His position mirrored hers. No, I'm fine.

Carter curled his lips inwardly into a tight smile as he closed his eyes once more, but still kept his face directed towards hers. He knew she was doing the same. To hell with it if they fell asleep. Someone would wake them up sooner or later.

- - -

Abby opened her eyes with a start. She took in her surroundings briefly, and they confirmed her suspicions. She didn't think she had even fallen asleep, but it was obvious Carter had as he murmured something inaudible, which she presumed to be cursing, besides her. Her breaths were coming out far more quickly than usually, and he seemed to pick up on this.

Abby, you ok?

She swallowed, and released a hold of his hand as she sat up. Uh, yeah, yeah.

Carter looked at her strangely, before glancing at his watch. Breaks not even over.

Uh, I know. You must have just drifted off for a few seconds.

He grabbed a hold of her hand to keep her from moving off of the sofa. Then why so jumpy?

I just , had a thought. It's ok, nothing major.

You sure?

Yeah, yeah. Look, I need to go. Uh, meet you in here at the end of shift?

Carter still looked puzzled. Sure. Where you going?

No where, I just remembered I left a kid and his Mom waiting in curtain three for his test results.

Carter seemed to buy it. OK. Catch you later. He kissed her palm before releasing it from his grasp. He smiled as he caught a glimpse of her smile as she turned and left the room.

Abby walked hastily from the lounge and across the ER, nearly bumping into Susan along the way. she murmured as she continued to walk.

Hey Abby! ABBY! Susan called from behind her, but Abby pretended not to hear her. I'll apologise later', she thought, as she moved towards the drug lockup, trying desperately to ignore the knot that had formed in her stomach a few minutes ago as she had been randomly thinking on the couch with Carter. She couldn't believe it had not occurred to her before now. God Abby, you're so dumb!' As soon as she reached the lockup, she headed directly to the far corner, and tiptoed so she could reach the blue box on the third shelf. She felt around for a few seconds before placing her hand around the familiar feeling oblong-shaped cardboard package. Just as she had retrieved it from the shelf, holding it in front of her to confirm it was what she wanted, she felt another presence in the room and turned around to see Chen smiling at her as she entered. Abby quickly shoved the package into the elastic of her scrub pants round her back, and smiled at Chen briefly before attempting to busy herself, covering up her real intentions of why she was in there.

You all right Abby? Jing-Mei asked, whilst retrieving a syringe and tiny glass bottle to accompany it.

Uh, yeah I'm fine thanks, just can't find the morphine. She stuttered.

Um, it's right in front of you.

Oh, yeah, silly me. It's what a busy day in the ER'll do to you. She laughed nervously.

Yeah, if you say so. Chen replied, giving Abby a strange look before heading out of the lockup.

Abby let out a huge sigh as she leaned against the self she was standing in front of, reaching behind her to pull the package from out of her scrubs. She held it in front of her with both hands, reading the label.

Ninety-seven percent accurate. A simple yes or no in only five minutes.

She could not believe the thought had not occurred to her before. She was late, two weeks late to be precise, and she was never late. Never. That was one of the things in her life she had always been able to rely on. Hitting the menstrual clock at exactly the right time every month. She had simply been counting when on her break in the lounge, and had panicked when she realised she had not had a period for a month and a half. That, together with the queasiness and the tiredness only spelt one thing. It was time to know for sure.

She hid the package up her sleeve as she walked out into the ER once more and headed for the ladies bathroom. As she pushed open the swinging door, she checked every cubicle to make sure they were all vacant. Luckily they were. The knot was continuing to build and build within her stomach, and not one cohesive thought was occupying her head at this moment. Her mind was racing, as well as her blood and adrenaline. She didn't know what to think. Wait for the results before you do any proper thinking' she told herself. OK calm, she had to stay calm.

The testing was over in seconds, but it was the results which tested her the most. Why couldn't they invent super speed pregnancy tests? She remained locked in the cubicle incase anyone else was to walk in. She didn't even know herself yet, she had no plans to share it with anyone else, let alone anyone from the ER who were the biggest breed of gossip spreaders though out the whole of Illinois. If it was positive, she wanted to be the first to know, and she wanted Carter to be second. Oh my God, how was she going to tell Carter? IF Abby, remember the IF!' She was thinking too fast and too far ahead.

She looked at her watch. Four minutes to go. There was a 50/50 chance of either possibility occurring. Anything could happen. Trouble was, she didn't know what she even wanted to happen. Did she want a baby? Didn't she? Wait. She needed to tell herself to wait. Only another...three minutes. Hell, these had to be the longest five minutes of her life.

She stood up from her seated position on the toilet seat and began to pace small steps around the enclosed cubicle. Wait. Wait. Wait. She began biting her nails, a habit which only surfaced when she was really nervous. Hell, I need a cigarette', she thought.

One hundred, one million, ninety nine, one million, ninety eight, one million...if she counted down the seconds maybe they would go by quicker. No. Someone once said that only watching the clock made it go slower, maybe that applied to counting too. Pink blue pink blue pink blue. You'd have a problem if you were colour blind. What the hell, she preferred counting to these random thoughts. Sixty eight, one million, sixty seven, one million, sixty six, one million...nearing a minute. She could imagine Kerry coming in here now and demanding her to get back to work. What a turn from when her and Susan had caught Kerry in the same cubicle with a syringe that had lead to her pregnancy. Maybe it was a sign. SHUT UP ABBY!' She looked at her watch once more. Thirty seconds. In thirty seconds she would know. Know if her life was about to take a dramatic change at all. Maybe she could sing. Yeah singing was good.

There's something in the way, she moves...

Singing was good except for when you had a voice like she did. She sat back down on the toilet seat, burying her head in her hands, still clutching onto the plastic strip. Stomach bug, who was she kidding? She let out a soothing breath as she glanced at her watch for the last time. Five. Four. Three. Two. One. Time was up. After all that, and she couldn't bring her self to look at the test. This was really it.

She told herself finally. She closed her eyes as she brought the test up in front of her and opened them after letting out one last breath. They took a while to adjust, the milli seconds seeming like years. The colour came into view, the colour that was about to change her life forever. The blue colour. The positive colour.

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