AN: Now they can talk

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The Missing Piece Chapter 11

Summary

Companion story to 'A Little Piece of My Heart' from EPOV

A bad decision causes Edward to make a mistake that could lead his life down the wrong path and cost him everything. The girl he didn't even know he loved left town with a piece of his heart.

In denial, will he realize that she held the missing piece all along?

Chapter 11

It felt so good to have Bella back in the apartment, though as she looked around at the changes Kate had made, she seemed uneasy. I could only guess that she was reminded of what had happened. It hadn't bothered me at the time, and I hadn't had the time to put everything back the way it had been before.

I knew, without any words spoken, that Bella wouldn't be comfortable in my bed, which I had shared with Kate. Instead, I fetched two bottles of water from the fridge and the spare blankets from the linen closet and we settled on the sofa, a much more comfortable, neutral place, figuratively speaking.

The silence between us remained comfortable. I held my arms out for her, inviting her to snuggle in with me, and she tucked herself under my arm as close to me as she could get. I reveled in the warmth of her body close to mine, knowing that although we had things to talk about, there wasn't anyone else between us right now.

"Tell me why you and Kate broke up, please, Edward? I spoke to Esme a couple of weeks ago, so why didn't she tell me?"

"Well, I can't tell you why Mom didn't tell you. It was never a secret, and I would never have asked her to keep it from you. I'm guessing she didn't want to push either of us into anything. I've already made enough of a mess of everything, and I needed to come to this realization on my own."

I thought back to all the conversations I'd had with my parents before the wedding, where they'd repeatedly wanted me to think about what I really wanted.

"How long ago did this happen? It wasn't because of me, was it?"

I took a swig from my water bottle, placing it and Bella's on the coffee table in front of us. Leaning in toward her, I took both of her hands in mine.

"First of all, it wasn't because of you—well, not directly. It took me a while, but eventually, I came to understand a few home truths, and sat down with Kate. When I messed up our friendship, Bella, I was too much of a coward to speak to you honestly. Instead, I buried my head in the sand and hoped for the best; that somehow everything would all work out for the best.

"I suppose Kate caught me at a vulnerable time. Not that it's any excuse for not speaking out," I hastened to add. "God..." I rubbed my hands over my face and ran my fingers through my hair. "I was so stupid. I'd already ruined my friendship with you, and when she started to tell everyone we were engaged, I kind of thought I owed it to her; that I would've proposed anyway."

I shook my head at how idiotic I'd been to let Kate direct everything from that moment on. I still wasn't sure I completely understood how I let things get so out of my control.

"I wish I'd never gone through with the wedding. When you left the church, I think my mind checked out, and somehow I found myself married to someone I wasn't sure I loved. Another bit of evidence of my cowardice," I said bitterly.

Bella's hands in mine grounded me, and I took a deep breath and continued.

"It was Kate's insistence it was time we started a family that brought it all to a head. I finally found the balls to speak up about everything that was wrong in our relationship. Not that it was all her fault; I was the one who'd stayed silent and let her do whatever she wanted. I have no idea why she would want someone who just did as they were told, but that was what I became.

"Anyway, in the conversation we had, I told her everything I was feeling. How she wanted me to get a better job, dress better, live in a better area. It was as if she was making me over into someone I wasn't so I would fit into her world. The worst of it was I let her do it. Her parents bought her a house—according to her, without asking, though with hindsight, I'm not so sure of that—and she said it made sense to move in now we were married and about to embark on a family."

"And what did you decide?"

"How can you be so calm about all of this, Bella?"

I tugged my hands from hers and stood. Unable to stand still, I paced in front of the blank television.

"You need to get this out, Edward, and I think I need to hear it. Getting angry isn't going to achieve anything except push us apart again. Come on; tell me the rest, please."

"Okay. I knew that starting a family definitely wasn't something I was comfortable with or was even sure I wanted, and bringing a child into such a one-sided relationship would be the worst mistake I could make. Initially, my argument was that we should enjoy being a couple before we thought about settling down and having a child. Eventually, I had to admit the absolute truth to myself: I didn't love Kate the way a husband should love his wife, and that's why I didn't want to try for a baby. That was my light-bulb moment; the moment I knew she wasn't the one I wanted. It was always you."

I returned to sit beside her and took her hands again.

"God, I'm a fool and the worst person you should consider as a partner. But, Bella, I really do love you, and I promise, if you give me a chance, I'll make it up to you. I'll prove I'm the right man for you. I don't care how long it takes for you to trust me again; I just want the chance."

Bella still hadn't really said anything and my mind mulled over all that had happened. I came to a number of realizations, and slowly tried to put everything into words to explain my behavior to her, hoping she would understand.

"When I think about it all now, I can see the reality of it so clearly. I did a lot of things wrong: from allowing Kate to railroad me into an engagement, to asking her to move in with me; all of it was a knee-jerk reaction to how you made me feel that night. I never regretted it, Bella. It just took me a while to get my head around why I'd let it happen, but I did feel incredibly guilty that I'd initiated something with you when Kate and I had only had a fight, one of many. Oddly enough, I know I fought against it so hard because I was so afraid of losing our friendship, and then everything I did only pushed you further away. I should have let my relationship with Kate go from the moment I touched you. Instead, I made you unhappy—" Her fingers on my lips stopped me speaking.

"Stop, Edward. It's true, I was unhappy for a while, but I did manage to keep my life going without you in it; I'm not totally helpless. Of course, I missed you, but I think it gave us both the space to come to terms with how we felt about each other. I don't know if we'd be where we are now without that time. I can forgive you for being an insensitive ass."

I laughed. "Thanks, I think. But, you're probably right, since you usually are. Anyway, I honestly don't know why Kate pushed so hard for marriage when she must have seen that my feelings for you had changed, long before I knew. Maybe that's why she did it; I don't know. In the end, her pride won out, and she packed her things without much of an argument and moved out that same afternoon. A month later, I was served with divorce papers; in another couple of months, we'll no longer be married. I just wish I'd told you all of this before I let the wedding go ahead. I never wanted you to feel bad about what happened between us."

Bella was quiet for a while, and I allowed her the time to get used to things I realized I'd already come to terms with.

"Where do we go from here, Edward?" she said eventually. "I know I love you and that you love me, but is that enough now? You thought you loved Kate, too. You said you didn't want to have a baby, but was that in general, or just with her?"

"We can go as fast or as slow as you want, Bella, as long as you're in my life. You're not the only one who's been in denial; it took a long time for my head to catch up with my heart, too. I just want to be with you. And for the record, I do want children, as many as you want. I just know that I didn't want them with Kate. I think loving the mother of your children should be the first consideration."

Bella pulled her legs up onto the sofa and turned to face me. "I want them, too, Edward, but we have plenty of time to make those decisions. For now, I want to take a shower and fall asleep with you here on this sofa as we've done countless times before. Tomorrow we can discuss the next step. Is that okay?"

I kissed her. "Sounds perfect to me. You can use the shower in my room or your old one, if you feel more comfortable, while I find something for you to wear, and then we can snuggle up right here."

Thirty minutes later, freshly showered and dressed for bed in a pair of my boxers and one of my old band t-shirts, Bella settled herself on the sofa and we swapped places. By the time I sat down again, Bella had made us hot chocolate and it was slowly cooling on the coffee table in front of us, soft music playing on the Bluetooth speaker.

Finishing the chocolate, I placed the cup back on the table next to Bella's and slid across the sofa until I was as close to her as I could get. I stared into her eyes, and finding the answer I was looking for, I leaned in for a kiss. Gentle, soft, and sweet at first, our lips met over and over again, tasting each other. With a groan, Bella reached for me, her arms twining around my neck, pulling me close and opening her mouth under mine.

This time, it was me who had to draw back to take a breath, and Bella followed my body as I leaned against the back of the sofa, her lips moving to my throat, sucking on my Adam's apple until I shivered. Not content with the distance between us, she straddled my lap, her hands now sliding under my t-shirt and across my abs. "Off please, Edward," she whispered. "I want you."

I lifted my arms and dragged it over my head, throwing it on the floor. My hands cupped her jaw, my lips meeting hers again. "I should never have"—kiss—"answered the phone that night, Bella. It drove a wedge between us"—kiss—"and I'm sorry for that, and the wasted time." I murmured the words against her lips. "Will you let me make it up to you? Please?"

"There's no need, Edward, really."

Pulling back, I gazed at her, finally seeing the love in her eyes and hoping she could see the same in mine. "There's every need, Bella. I want a do-over, a chance to make a new future. With you."

"You always had a little piece of my heart, Edward; I just didn't realize it until I saw you at the church. I didn't want to ruin what you and Kate had, and I can admit it now—I took the job Victoria offered me and ran. That way I didn't have to see you, which would have forced me to confront myself about my true feelings. I want that chance with you, too."

I stood, and Bella wrapped her legs around my waist. Never moving from her position in my arms, I kneeled on the couch, her body now lying underneath mine. I lowered my body slowly until my cock was resting against the heat between her legs. Flexing my hips brought a deeper groan from her throat, telling me I was in the right place. I flexed, again and again, thrusting against her, and with each pass, the heat and wetness grew.

My head rested in the crook of her neck, her scent surrounding me. The friction between us was off the charts. I was reluctant to stop, but Bella had other ideas and hooked her toes in the waistband of my sleep pants, pushing them down over my hips. I kneeled over her and pushed them down and off my feet, my erection springing free.

She freed her hands from my hair and lifted her body enough to pull her t-shirt off, leaving her breasts bare. I held myself up on one elbow and traced the skin from her lips down between them, before palming each in turn. Her nipples hardened, and I lowered my head to suck one into my mouth, flicking my tongue over the nub before swapping to the other.

Bella was squirming underneath me, her hips lifting and seeking my cock, while her hands slid up my sides, lightly tickling at the skin, then making their way over my biceps to land on the back of my neck. Holding my head against her chest, she whispered a breathless plea. "More, Edward, more."

Raising myself a little, I tucked my fingers into the waistband of the boxers she wore and slid them off, baring the rest of her body. "You're so beautiful, Bella. I love you."

Leaning forward, I caught her lips with mine again and lowered my body until my cock was resting between her legs, her wetness coating me. I pulled back a few inches and thrust forward, my cock hitting her clit. Bella gasped, and I repeated the action just as she tilted her hips, and I slid inside her warmth.

"Fuck," I breathed, stilling at the sensation before pulling out and thrusting in again.

I lowered my body the rest of the way until every inch of her was touching every inch of me—chest-to-chest, stomach-to-stomach, hip-to-hip, and leg-to-leg. My cock was inside her so deep that there wasn't an inch between our bodies. Our lips were touching as we exchanged breath for breath, and I no longer knew where I ended and she began.

The little piece of my heart she'd held all this time remained with her and would always do so, just as that little piece of hers would always be embedded in mine.

~ oOo ~

AN: The epilogue will post on A Little Piece of My Heart next weekend split into 2 parts on Saturday and Sunday

If you prefer these two not to be together, then please be kind and don't flame them

I will always write B/E HEA, no matter what it takes to get them there - it's my preference

I'm truly grateful for all of your encouragement for both of these stories