Disclaimer: I don't own Skyrim.

—

"At fucking last" Raxal grumbled as he strolled through the gates of Whiterun. Crimple had ran on ahead to the apothecary so Raxal was able to walk in sweet silence up to Dragons Reach. When he entered the Dark Elf in the hall drew her sword and approached him.

"What is the meaning of this interruption?" She asked "Jarl Balgruuf is not receiving visitors."

Raxal sighed "Look lady, I just wanna turn my bounty in and get paid."

"Well go ahead, but I'll be watching you Orc" she sheathed her sword and walked back to the Jarl.

'Cunt.'

Raxal strode up to the Jarl's advisor, Proventus, and quickly collected his bounty and he was about to leave when the Jarl spoke up.

"I may have a job for you bounty hunter."

Raxal turned and eyed him with interest "What's kinda job?"

"Something suitable for someone with your particular talents, perhaps" Jarl Balgruuf stood "come, let us find my court wizard, Farengar. He has been studying these dragons and…rumours of dragons."

The Jarl started walking and Raxal followed him across the hall and into a room with the court wizard…and Crimple.

"The fuck are you doing here!" Raxal blurted out.

"I was consulting with the court wizard" Crimple replied in a rather theatrical voice.

"…About?"

"Making Mune stay longer."

"…Why?"

"I'M LONELY OKAY!" Crimple shouting with a surprisingly straight face.

"…Okay."

Jarl Balgruuf chuckled then spoke "Farengar I think I've found someone who can help with your dragon project."

Crimple, who had been in the middle of leaving, promptly turned around and strode back up to Raxal's side.

"Go ahead and fill him in with all the details" the Jarl continued.

"So the Jarl thinks you can be of use to me?" Farengar spoke "Oh yes, he must be referring to my research into the dragons."

"Given he said 'Dragon Project' I'd say so" Raxal responded dryly.

"…Yes…well I could use someone to fetch something for me. Well, when I say fetch, I really mean delve into a dangerous ruin in search of an ancient stone tablet that may or may not actually be there."

Raxal narrowed his eyes "Pray tell how that is relevant to the conundrum the dragons represent?"

Farengar looked vaguely confused at the Orc's vocabulary "…Huh, no mere brute mercenary, but a thinker - perhaps even a scholar?"

Raxal's face gave nothing away.

"You see, when stories of dragons began to circulate, many dismissed them a mere fantasies, rumours. Impossibilities. One sure mark of a fool is to dismiss anything that falls outside his experience as being impossible. But I began to search for information about dragons - where had they gone all those years ago? And where were they coming from?"

"And my job is…?" Raxal questioned.

"I ah, learned of a certain stone tablet said to be housed in Bleak Falls Barrow - a "Dragonstone," said to contain a map of dragon burial sites. Go to Bleak Falls Barrow, find this tablet - no doubt interred in the main chamber - and bring it to me. Simplicity itself."

Raxal highly doubted it would be that simple but he simply said "Okay" and walked out.

"Wait!" Crimple ran up next to him "Imma come with ya!"

"For crying out loud, why?"

"I needs me some more bonemeal, so I'll just use all the skeletons in there."

"Why do you need bonemeal?"

Crimple took a deep sniff "Don't worry about it."

"Okay" Raxal groaned 'This is gonna be a long walk.'

—

It turned out Crimple didn't leave the slow walking Raxal in his wake as Crimple collect flowers, mushrooms and other thing for potion ingredients. Every two steps. Crimple somehow managed to dart off the path nearly every second to collect stuff. And eat it. Every if it was dangerous apparently.

"Crimple…why did you eat that?"

Crimple merely coughed up some more blood so Raxal sighed and cast Healing Hands on him.

"Wow thanks!" Crimple shot up to his feet "I feel all better now!" He then raised his hand to his mouth.

Raxal smacked the back of his head "Don't eat more idiot!"
—

Raxal and Crimple began to ascend the mountain and came across several bandits who were quickly dispatched by several precision arrows from Crimple however one arrow struck Raxal in the forehead.

"How didn't that go further into your head?" Crimple asked curiously.

"Oakflesh" Raxal responded calmly as he pulled the arrow from his head.

"When'd you cast that?" Crimple thought back but couldn't recall Raxal casting said spell.

"About two years ago."

"Okay-WHAT?!"

Raxal shrugged "I found a loophole" he said simply.

"In the rules of magic?!"

"Yep" and with that Raxal kept walking.

After a brief moment of befuddlement Crimple simply followed him and the two were soon approaching Bleak Falls Barrow. Raxal drew the Oathblade, as Crimple had finally told him its name, and ready a Lightning Bolt in the other and Crimple seemed to melt into the background. An arrow sailed past Raxal's face and his hand snapped up and shot a lightning bolt at the bandit, who managed to survive for all of two seconds before an arrow buried itself in their head. Raxal drew his steel sword and quickly parried a blow from another bandit that had run up to him and then stabbed the unfortunate marauder in the throat. Raxal made his way up the stairs and was forced to raise both of his weapons to block a strike from a war hammer wielding bandit, Raxal did not have to struggle against the bandit for long because another arrow lodged itself in the bandits heart. The bandit groaned and toppled down the stairs while Crimple seemed to materialise behind Raxal.

"Did Crimple do gooood?" He asked his traveling companion.

"…Yes" Raxal answered warily.

"YAY!" Crimple did a happy dance.

Raxal simply raised an eyebrow then continued to the entrance of the barrow. Crimple let Raxal heft open the doors and they slipped inside. They took a few steps in when they spotted two more bandits. Raxal sheathed his blades and put his hands together to create a dual-cast Firebolt while Crimple drew an arrow back in his bow, they both waited a moment and unleashed their attacks, each one felled a bandit so they continued onwards. They pushed their way through a few cobwebs and Raxal watched Crimple rather efficient looting skills before heading down more steps. They traveled down the halls while keeping alert, passing only a lit brazier and Raxal swiping a minor healing potion from a bookcase. They soon came across a bandit in the room before they but they waited at the top of the stairs as he flipped a switch and was soon cut down by a multitude of arrows. Raxal and Crimple merely glanced at each other then they descended the stairs, however Crimple stopped at the entrance of the room.

"Me thinks I good being here."

Raxal rolled his eyes and went into the room. Raxal completely bypassed the switch and went up the stairs to the right where, after taking note of the animal engravings, found another healing potion. Raxal went back down the stairs and spotted pillars with animal engravings on them. He walked up to them and discover he could turn them. So he turned them to the corresponding animal engravings to the others in the room, even the broken one on the ground, before taking a deep breath and pulling the lever. To his relief, and Crimple's apparent disappointment, the gate opened and the two continued on. Crimple rushed to the chest and seemed to be trying to climb into it while Raxal picked up a book on a nearby table. After glancing at the title inside the book, 'THIEF, By Reven', Raxal handed it to Crimple.

"I think you'll like this."

Crimple opened it "Ooooh yay."

They walked down some spiral stairs, Raxal burnt some Skeevers to death, found a Scroll of Fireball and then they heard someone calling out.

"Is…is someone coming?" The voice called "Is that you Harknir? Bjorn? Soling?"

Raxal and Crimple looked at each other and shrugged and continued forwards. Raxal burned through some webbing and entered a large web-covered room and noticed a dark elf stuck in webbing before an enormous spider descended from the ceiling. Raxal and Crimple stared at it blankly for a second then they both raised their hands and unleashed torrents of flame upon it.

"Kill it!" Crimple shouted "kill it with FIRE!"

The spider soon succumbed to the intense heat and flames and died but the two kept up the assault until their Magicka was expended. After a moment the two strolled over to the Dark Elf trapped in webbing.

"You did it" he said "You killed it. Now cut me down before anything else shows up."

"…Okay" Raxal stated simply but when he cut the webbing the Elf pushed him back and ran. The two chased him into another room where Crimple shot an arrow into his back, forcing him to collapse. Raxal walked up and stomped on his neck, breaking it instantly. They looted him. Raxal read his journal while Crimple played with the large golden claw he found and continued on. After killing some Draugr they came to a short hallway with swinging blades. Crimple laid down on his stomach and crawled underneath the the blades. Once through the hall Crimple stood and pulled a chain that stilled the blades. They continued to walk the halls and cut down or burn any Draugr in their way. After killing a Restless Draugr that managed to cut Raxal, he healed himself and they continued into Bleak Falls Sanctum. After crawling under more blades and engaging in more Draugr slaughter they came to a door with moving rings and a place for the golden claw. Crimple started messing with it and Raxal sat down and fell asleep.

—

"RAXAL!"

Raxal jerked awake and looked up at Crimple "What?"

"I can't get the door open with this" he held up the claw.

"Did you try the combination on the front of the claw?"

Crimple stared blankly as he turned the claw around "Oh" he then quickly opened the door and they walked on and entered a cavern like room. A colony of bats flew from the ceiling and around their heads as they strolled past. They found a wall of strange writing and where examining it when the coffin behind them burst open and a Draugr Overlord emerged from it.

"…Shit…" both Raxal and Crimple muttered simultaneously.

Crimple started firing arrows and Raxal rushed forwards and started slicing at the Overlord. With the combined relentless assault they quickly killed the Draugr and after a brief rest Raxal picked up the enchanted greatsword it was using and he rested the flat of the blade on his shoulder.

"Look what Crimple found!" He shouted as he held aloft a certain stone tablet.

"Oh hey that's the one we need."

"Sweet."

They ascended the stairs to the left of the chamber and pulled a lever that opened a stone wall. They continued on, took some flowers off an altar and left the barrow an back out into Skyrim.

"…Wanna crash at Riverwood's inn?"

"Heck yeah."

—

She sighed in contentment as she ate her soup. These guards were so nice to her. And this was the Whiterun Watchtower. Nothing bad could happen here.

—

Crimple belongs to LittleGhoulish of Deviantart.