I have no words for this. It was in my mind and now it's coming out. Mature audiences only. Don't hate.

This is an intro chapter, to set the mood and give context. Expect the next chapter - with all its smutty goodness - in about a week. Coinciding with one or two other chapters that are in the works.

Chapter One: And so it begins

"God damn it!"

Izuku Midoriya - the most powerful and influential private investigator in Japan - shouted as he stormed into his office. The reason for the swearing - which would have been out of place on a younger Izuku - was because he had finally hit his breaking point.

All his life he had been looked down upon for something that he could not help. For years, his Quirkless nature had been used by damn near everyone in his life to try and stifle his progress. But, after middle school, Izuku fought back. He speed through high-school classes in less than six months, as well as taking multiple classes in martial arts. His high IQ helped - Izuku was a natural born genius, as well as intelligent and skilled enough to pick up on any new material in an instant. By his 16th birthday, Izuku had graduated college with a degree in Criminal Justice and Forensic Science, and had immediately gone to work for the police.

He passed through the academy with flying colors, and it was while he was training for his detective's license he happened upon the...thing that changed his life forever.

Or should he say the thing found him.

He had walked back from class one day - tired and angry, as some of his classmates in the detectives class had tried to bully him for his lack of Quirk - when he walked into his home and saw his mother sitting with a...animal in a suit. Izuku immediately recognized the creature and felt no small amount of apprehension.

But Principal Nezu of UA calmed his nerves and invited him to join in tea time. Izuku had sat through as Nezu listed all of his achievements up to that point before coming to the point. Said point being a formal invitation to UA's Hero Course.

To the surprise of both his mother and Nezu, Izuku refused. His reasons:

"I'm not stepping within five feet of the walking bomb or that overinflated, smiling buffon you have hired as a teacher. Thanks but no thanks."

Those words had shocked Nezu - though Izuku believed that he was mentally putting some pieces into place - but the Quirked animal recovered fast. Instead, he asked Izuku if he was satisfied with a job in the police.

"As if." Izuku snorted. "I plan on getting my detective's license, then fucking off and becoming a private investigator. I will never work for any organization that has ever shit on me for something I couldn't help. And don't say that the police wouldn't, because I've seen the looks from some of the officers. The only good ones are Tsukauchi and his lot, and they are only a handful. No, I plan on making a name for myself. Even if I live off welfare for the rest of my life, I'm going to solve the biggest crimes in Japan - and I'm going to do it without a Hero's help. Then, I'll show the world what a "quirkless, useless Deku" can do."

Needless to say, Nezu was intrigued by that and offered his help. He would use his government connections to help speed up the process - thus enabling Izuku to get his PI license within a month or two. In return, Izuku would put his prodigious mind to work for Nezu, who would give Izuku the full credit for any and all cases that Izuku helped with.

Smiling fiercely, Izuku agreed, but gave the stipulation that he chose the Heroes and students that he interacted with. Nezu agreed and the two shook.

Two months later, Izuku Midoriya was now a private investigator with an office/apartment in the downtown Mustafa district. And not a moment too soon. The Hero Killer Stain had recently crippled the Hero Ingenium, leaving the man's family distraught, especially his younger brother, Tenya Iida. Said potential Hero had flung himself into an internship with the soul desire to defeat Stain. However, he would have perished if not for the timely intervention of Izuku Midoriya, who had disarmed the Hero Killer of his knives and defeated him in close combat.

Despite the Hero Public Safety Commission's best efforts to give the credit to Endeavor, Nezu had pulled through with his end of the deal, and Izuku was given full credit - a whole ton of clientele. The one plus side to all of this was that Izuku had made quick friends with the younger Iida, who had thanked his savour.

Through Iida, Izuku was put in contact with the other UA Hero Course students and hit it off fabulously with them - all except for two. Katsuki Bakugou was no surprise, and had threatened to blow Izuku's face up when the two hero classes were taken to his office on a field trip. In return, Izuku offered to cut Bakugou's hands clean off his body. They were stopped from having any conflict by Eraserhead, who had given Bakugou detention for threatening a civilian.

The other student Izuku couldn't get along with was one Neito Monoma of Class 1-B. The boy began to make disparaging comments about Izuku's Quirklessness - much to the shock of his classmates - before stating that 'if a Quirkless freak could defeat Stain, then anybody could.'

Before his teacher or classmates could reprimand him, Iida came quickly to his new friend's defence, striking Monoma unconscious, while warning the boy not to mock Izuku or those who fought against Stain.

Regardless, Izuku continued to forge strong friendships with the potential Heroes, helping them out in numerous situations. Primarily, Izuku helped plan the assault on the League of Villains to rescue Bakugou (even though he really didn't want to), the assault on the Yakuza (where he personally took down Overhaul and earned the life-long enmity of Lemillion and Sir Knighteye), and finally the full defeat of the Paranormal Liberation Front, where Izuku defeated both Dabi and Tomura Shigaraki by himself.

All the credit was given to Izuku and he relished in the fact that he had defeated the greatest evils that had plagued Japan - and he had done it all without a Quirk or being a Hero.

Naturally, while many celebrated him, there were plenty of people who disparaged him for his Quirkless state, calling on the Hero's to "put the freak in his place". Yet Izuku never had anything to fear, as he had the majority of the Top 20 Hero's on his side - barring Lemillion, Ground Zero, and Phantom Thief.

Even with all of this, Izuku still felt like he needed to pull one over on the assholes that looked down on him. But he had no idea how. He had gone to one of his best friends for advice but when he got to her place, he heard something that really set him off.

"Hey Round Face, I wanna take you to dinner."

"Bakugou? What the-"

"It's a date. Well, do you say yes or no?"

"...Yes"

His best (female) friend, Ochako Uraraka, was going on a date with his arch-enemy. "What the fuck! How the fuck is that fair!" Izuku raged as he slammed into his chair and took a deep breath.

He and Uraraka had been close ever since they met. They had been best friends, with Izuku giving her advice on her Quirk and Uraraka constantly being his most ardent supporter. As they grew older, that friendship turned more and more physical, to the point of being friends with benefits. Neither was looking for a relationship - Uraraka needed to stay focused and get grounded as a Hero and Izuku was too involved in the hunt for the Front. But those nights that they spent in each other's arms were always magical, and Izuku knew that he had fallen hard for the girl. He planned on confessing to her in a couple weeks, having finished planning a big reveal.

Only for Bakugou to come in and ruin everything! Well Izuku had had enough.

"I am not going to let Bakugou have his way again. I spent my life being tortured by that shit-stain, but this...this is the last straw. Bakugou, Monoma, Toogata...all of them. They will all pay for everything they have ever said and done to me. But I can't hurt them physically. I'd go to jail - and there's no way I can defeat Lemillion. So how…"

While Izuku was thinking, his phone buzzed. Looking at it, he saw that it was Uraraka.

Uravity: Hey Deku, can I come over? There's...something I need to talk to you about.

Izuku glanced at the text and for a brief moment, considered sending back a snide reply about her and Bakugou. But then he thought back to all the times he had Uraraka moaning under him, saying his name, shouting his praise.

It was in these deep thoughts of revelry that Izuku struck gold. Quickly typing a message indicating that she could come over, Izuku began to rapidly plan the next stages in his plan to get even.

"I can't win their way. Their way is violence and Quirks. I'm good at one but don't have the other. And any physical action will automatically be my fault. So if I can't outfight them," Izuku smirked, nearly devolving into chaotic laughter.

"I'm going to out-fuck them."

Cut! Like I said, sexy times start next chapter, along with the official warnings for the story. So yea, beware.

I understand if what I wrote doesn't make any sense. But this is essentially Porn with small plot. Sorry not sorry for not putting a lot of effort into the plot. But anyways, until next time, peace.

Next time on The "Real" All For One: Uraraka Loves the Dicku

TheSaintsFollower, signing out.