Chapter 1:

When You're Jealous Of The Floozy Your Partner Is With, But You're The Floozy

Marinette stood above the city of Paris, bit her lip, and waited for the inevitable. This wasn't a conversation she had ever wanted to have, but she needed to. It wasn't fair to her, or to her partner, if she didn't. He had to know, and she had to tell him.

See, the one thing she had never expected in a million years had finally happened, and she knew her world would never be the same.

That's right.

Adrien asked her out.

So, it was actually really adorable. They had been walking home from a class field trip when he ended up walking right beside her. When Marinette looked to her other side, her designated wing woman, Alya, had vanished.

"Hey," he said in a playful voice.

'Oh God,' Marinette had thought, her brain locking up. 'What is happening? Why is he talking to me? Here? Now? At this hour?'

"Hey," she said back in a shaky voice. Yeah, good response. Play it cool.

"So," Adrien said as he rubbed the back of his head nervously. "Um, I wanted to talk to you. About something. If you don't mind."

'Why is he pausing like that?' Marinette thought. Her poker face never wavered; too-wide eyes and a gigantic grin. Perfectly natural.

"Sure! What's up?" Maybe this was about homework, or about something from the field trip, or maybe he had questions concerning…

"Would you like to come with me to the movies this weekend? The last time we went, we never got to finish the film and I thought, why not try again?"

Concerning her. Oh God. The question was concerning HER.

Marinette looked at him and gave the only possible answer she could.

"Huwah?"

Adrien let out a small laugh and grinned as Marinette started to process what he had just said.

"So, would you?"

"Like a… Like a… Like a…?"

Inside Marinette's head were, well, the same thing in everyone's head, really. But if you could see her thoughts at the moment, one might see hundreds of tiny Marinette's running around frantically, papers flying everywhere as a total system shutdown was commencing.

"She says yes," Alya suddenly said from her other side. Marinette felt Alya's hand on the back of her head, pushing it slightly up and down in a 'yes' gesture.

"Great!" Adrien said, relieved. "So, see you at two tomorrow?"

"Two is a time," Marinette said, still grinning.

"See you then," Adrien said as a silver sedan pulled up beside them. The back door popped open for him as he tossed his schoolbag inside and hopped in.

The Gorilla waited for Adrien to buckle up. He glanced in the rear-view at Adrien with an eyebrow raised.

Adrien saw his look, smiled, and nodded. "She said yes."

The Gorilla gave a small smile and hit play on the car's stereo. As they drove off, Alya and Marinette heard Let's Get It Started blasting from the speakers.

"So," Alya said. "That just happened."

"THAT JUST HAPPENED!" Marinette screamed. "He just! He just! He… He…"

Alya cursed as she caught a fainting Marinette. "Okay, need to work on what is considered an appropriate response to social customs, don't we? Let's get you home, Juliet."

She slung Marinette's arm over her shoulder and led the trembling, blubbering, deliriously happy girl home.

That had been earlier that day, and after Marinette spent an appropriate forty five minutes rolling on the floor of her room while screaming into her pillow (during which she subsequently blacked out), she suddenly remembered something.

Or, someone, to be precise.

It was no secret that Chat Noir had a crush on Ladybug. In fact, he made sure to advertise that fact every chance he got. Whether it was by trying to lure her in with a candlelit dinner, or by confessing his undying love in television interviews, it was painfully obvious that her kitty had it bad for her.

And she, in turn, thought he was… Nice.

I mean, she loved him, but more in that familial way that made her slightly sick to her stomach when the idea of actual romance came into the picture. She cared for him deeply, in fact, she couldn't imagine life without him.

That didn't mean she wanted to jump his bones, though.

So, that led her to their favorite hangout rooftop. She had to tell him. She had to! It would break his heart, she knew that. Still, it was the right thing to do.

"Hey, bugaboo! What's up?"

The right thing to do.

"Heeeey," she said back as he landed beside her. She did her best to be casual, which was absolutely not casual at all. She tried to lean on a smokestack and missed, nearly falling flat on her face before she righted herself and stood with her hand on her hip. "Hey," she said again.

So smooth.

She noticed the look on his face, and suddenly felt nervous. He was smiling, but there was something off about it. Something different from the usual, playful grin she had grown accustomed to. He shot her a look and said, "Hey. So, before we go on patrol, can I talk to you about something?"

'Oh no,' She thought to herself. 'He's going to proclaim his love for me. Again. I just hope he doesn't lay down an ultimatum.'

"Um, sure! There was something I wanted to talk to you about, too," she said, smiling.

Chat nodded and wandered the roof for a bit. Marinette was about to ask what was wrong when he sat down on a ledge facing her and said, "I, um, I have a date tomorrow."

"…What?"

Well, this was unexpected.

But hey, it was a good thing, right?

Chat nodded. "So yeah. I, um, I've been wrestling with this for a while now, and I realized that I love you, and I'll always love you, but it's not fair to either of us for me to keep chasing after you. I'm so sorry for that."

Marinette smiled and said, "Hey, that's okay Chat. It's fine."

Fine fine fine fine fine.

"See, there's this girl. Um, I'd rather not say who for, um identity purposes, but she and I… I think there's something there. I think there's been something there for a while now, and after talking to some of my friends, I realized that if I didn't at least try, I'd always regret not knowing, so I asked. And, um, she said yes."

Marinette breathed a small sigh of relief. At least, she thought it was relief.

"That's great to hear! Um, it makes what I had to say a little easier, too. Sooooo… You know that boy I keep going on about?"

Chat grabbed his chest, swooned, and in a not-good impression of her voice, said, "My heart belongs to another!" He looked at her deadpan. "That one?"

She glared at him. "Don't be a jerk. Yes, that one. He finally asked me out. I was actually standing here trying to figure out how to tell you."

Chat smiled. "That's great, LB. I'm really happy for you. Heh, I guess it's strange how things turn out."

"Yeah," Marinette said as a feeling she wasn't able to quite place started bubbling deep within her. "Strange. So, what details can you share?"

"Well, we're going to the movies tomorrow."

"Us, too! There's a new premiere! Love Knife part 3: Knife Harder!"

Chat nodded. "That's the one. You're going, too?"

Ladybug nodded, but blew it off. "Yeah, but, I mean, there's like a dozen theaters in Paris. The chances of us running into each other at something that crowded are remote, and even if we did, the place will be swarmed with couples. So, no biggie there."

Chat thought about it. "Huh. Yeah, I guess that makes sense. Okay, so, cool." She gave her a genuine smile. "This is great for both of us."

Marinette nodded, her face locked in perma-smile. "Sure is. Say, you wanna meet up afterwards? See how things went and compare notes?"

Chat squirmed a bit. "Um, I guess so? But, I don't know that I'm comfortable talking about her like that."

"I don't mean in a bad way," Marinette said, lying through her teeth.

Wait, what?

"I mean to just see if each other's evening went well, see if we're interested. In them. Interested in them. Where things are going. Going with them, I mean. You know what I mean?"

Chat eyed her for a second. "You're a little jittery today, you know that?"

"Whaaaaaaat? Noooooooo," she said convincingly.

Chat shrugged. "Okay, cool. We can meet here tomorrow night and discuss."

"Great!" Marinette said, still smiling. "It's a date. Now, think you can beat me to the Louvre?"

She already had her yoyo out and was swinging before he could muster a response.

Later that night, Marinette paced in her room as Tikki munched on a macaroon.

"I mean, of course I'm happy for him," she said slightly louder than she probably meant to. "He's a great guy and I am so happy that he's got someone that he likes."

Tikki continued to eat. "Mmm," she said.

"Well, of course I want to know more!" Marinette said, gesturing to no one in particular. "What if she's mean? What if she's taking advantage of him? I mean, for all we know, she could be some sex-crazed monster out to seduce my poor, innocent… Partner."

Tikki continued to eat her cookie. "Mmm," she said through a mouthful of food.

"Exactly!" Marinette nearly shouted. "He's playing with fire, Tikki. This girl, this so-called great person that he thinks he's into? Who knows what's running though her head? He needs me, Tikki. He needs me to keep him safe. I mean, that's what this is. I'm his partner and I keep him safe."

Tikki finished her cookie, swallowed, and said, "Sounds to me like you're jealous."

Marinette's eyes went wide as she made scoffing sounds. "Wha? What are? Ohh! How? How could? Me? Me, jealous of him? I… Oh! Oh!"

Tikki watched all of this with an emotionless face. "Whatever you say, Marinette."

"What would make you even think that?"

Tikki made a point of thinking about it. "Well, you didn't care one way or the other when he was interested in you, but the second he's interested in someone else, you blow your top. I'd say there are some jealousy issues there."

Marinette glared at her kwami. "You don't know what you're talking about."

Tikki shrugged. "Sure, the immortal goddess of creation who happens to have been with dozens upon dozens of young women in your exact situation doesn't know anything." She floated up to eye level. "Look, just be happy for him, okay? After all, you did just score a date with the boy of your dreams, didn't you?"

Marinette's eyes went glassy at that. "Oh, yeah… Yeah, point."

So, things were fine.

Yep.

…

The fic is still going, so obviously things were not fine. You know this game.

That Saturday night, Marinette swung to their usual hangout spot, eager to share details of her date. More importantly, she was there to hear the finer points of his date.

"I wonder if it went well," she said to herself as she touched down. She had even gone so far as to look around the theater several times, and sure enough, there were quite a few couples. It was entirely possible that they had been in the same room, but she couldn't be sure.

"Hey," Chat said as he dropped in a moment later. He stood and leaned on his staff as Marinette stared at him, practically vibrating.

"So, what happened?" She blurted out. Our girl is one for subtlety.

Chat blushed and looked away. "Um, it was nice."

Marinette nodded. "Okay, okay. Nice. How nice?"

Chat turned red. "I don't feel comfortable talking about this, honestly."

Marinette put up her hands. "Sorry! Sorry. I didn't mean to make you feel self-conscious."

Chat shrugged and gave her a smile. "It's okay. It's just… The date went well, is all."

"Oh?"

Chat shuffled his feet from nervousness. "Yeah. Um, we had a great time, and she was really nice, and, um, the movie was neat."

Marinette nodded. "Wasn't it awesome when he jumped down from the skylight?"

Chat grinned. "I know, right? That was, like, the coolest scene!"

"Oh, and when he kicked the diamond smuggler off the cliff? That was so cool. I loved it!"

"It did have a lot of action," Chat said. "It was better than the second one…"

Marinette nodded. "But not as good as the first. It was a good apology movie."

"Agreed." He looked at her for a moment. "And how was your date?"

Marinette turned red. "Oh? My date? He was fine. I mean, he looked fine. He was okay. He was a good date. Yes. Good. It was good."

She looked at Chat for a bit. "And what about afterwards?"

Chat blushed harder. "Um, afterwards?"

Marinette nodded, grinning.

"Well, I walked her back to her place and, um…" He turned beet red. "We said goodnight?"

Marinette giggled. "You kissed her?"

Chat rubbed the back of his head and looked away. "I don't know if I should talk about that."

Marinette nodded. "Quite. Whoever this mystery girl is, I'm sure she would appreciate your discretion."

Chat eyed her. "What about you?"

Marinette bounced in place. "Okay, girls can talk about that. He kissed me! We finally, actually kissed! And it was awesome!" She spun around, smiling and laughing. "It was exactly what I had hoped for."

She stopped spinning and finally noticed his blush. "You kissed your date, too, didn't you?"

Chat shrank a bit. "Am I a jerk if I talk about it?"

Marinette felt her heart swell. For all her partner's over-the-top antics, he was a romantic, respectful softy. "Well, normally it would be a jerk thing for a guy to do, but considering I don't know her, and considering that you're my teammate, I think it's allowed. Besides," she said in a formal tone. "It's important that I know."

"Oh?" He asked. "How is that important for you to know?"

"I mean," Marinette started, her face slightly red. "If this girl turns out to be bad news, I think I should know. This is my way of protecting you."

"So, it's just to keep me safe?" Chat asked, giving her the eye. "No other reason?"

"What reason would I possibly have aside from concern for you?"

Chat thought about it. "Maybe… You're a bit jealous?"

A yoyo cracked him in the face.

"Hmmph!" Chat got out as he rolled backwards. "Geez! Okay, okay, fine. You're totally not jealous," he said as he got back to his feet.

Totally not jealous.

"So, despite my better judgement in telling you, yes. We kissed."

Marinette smiled and got uncomfortably close to him. "And?"

Chat looked at her, confused. "And what?"

"How was it? Was she good? I mean, if she was too good, then you might question how much practice she's had. Just saying," she just said.

Chat shrugged. "I, um, I'm not sure. She was, uh, nice? And she tasted like strawberries and it felt good? Aside from that, I really don't know."

"What?" Marinette asked, confused. "How can you not know?"

Chat twiddled his fingers. "Can I share something private with you? And can you promise not to make fun of me for it?"

Marinette instantly softened. She reached out and took his hand. "Hey, of course you can. I promise, whatever it is, I will not pick on you. What's wrong?"

He shook his head. "Nothing is wrong, but… It was my first kiss."

Marinette's eyes went wide. "Ooooh, so…"

Chat nodded. "I really don't have a basis of comparison."

"I see," Marinette thought to herself. So, this girl, whoever she was, was taking gross advantage of her kitten's inexperience? I mean, it wasn't like she had a lot of room to talk. Eric Coulvert in the sixth grade hadn't really given her a lot of comparable experience that rainy day behind the bleachers, but still, this was different.

Also, he had braces. That's fine by itself, but there were some skittles in them and… Look, it was weird.

"She didn't make you do anything you didn't want to, did she?" Marinette asked.

Chat shook his head. "Not at all, and I didn't do anything more than that. I just… It was really nice."

Marinette saw the look in his eyes. "You're really smitten with her, aren't you?"

Chat nodded. "Well, yeah. Aside from you, she's easily one of my best friends. She's smart, and funny, and she can kick my butt at video games. Also, her parents are really nice."

Marinette considered all of this. "So, why didn't you ask out little miss perfect before?"

"Because of you."

'Oh,' Marinette thought.

"I was committed to you in my heart, but the more I spent time with her, we just, well, clicked."

"I see," Marinette said. "Well then, that was for the best, wasn't it? Just… I don't know. A girl who kisses on the first date seems a little loose, if you ask me."

Chat frowned. "You just said you kissed yours."

Marinette chuffed. "Yeah, but, I mean, that's true love. And I've been waiting for that kiss for, like, a year. Don't judge me."

Chat shrugged. "Okay, whatever. I mean, it just feels like you're holding me to a standard you aren't committing to yourself."

Marinette felt her eye twitching. "Excuse me? Just because you decide to let some… Hussy jump you on your first night out with her doesn't mean it's the same thing as waiting for true love's kiss!"

"Hussy?!" Chat scoffed. "She's one of the best people I've ever met in my life!" He gave her the critical eye. "You know what?"

"What?"

"You're jealous," Chat said, crossing his arms.

"I am not jealous! I am concerned!" Marinette shot back. "My best friend is letting some floozy take advantage of him and he doesn't seem capable of seeing it!"

"Where the Hell is any of this even coming from?!" Chat shouted. "First, you're all happy for me, then you act all understanding, and now you're insulting the girl I like! You're not making any sense, LB."

Marinette narrowed her eyes and pointed. "Just because I'm thinking about your situation from an objective standpoint does not mean that…"

"There is nothing objective about insulting a girl you haven't met yet," Chat said, turning away. "I get it, you're jealous. I was giving you all of my attention and the second I stop, the second, you go on the attack!"

"Someone has to look out for you," Marinette snapped.

"I offered to let that someone be you for a year," Chat said in an even tone. "Now that it's not you, you suddenly want the job?"

"I don't want the job, or any other innuendo!" Marinette bit back.

"Look," Chat said with a growl. "She's a fantastic girl and I care about her a lot. And if… If I want to do things with her, and she wants to do them with me, then I'll, I'll do those things! I'll do all the things!"

Admittedly, he had only a rough idea as to what those things were. Adrien was a good kid. He was curious, and he had access to the Internet, but still. Good kid.

"Oooo," Marinette said. "Look at the big cat. Where was all this confidence before?"

"I'll show you where it was! It was here is where it was!"

Chat needed to work on his talk-back game a bit.

"I'll show you! The next time I see her, I'm, I'm totally gonna make out with her. How about that?"

Marinette marched right up to him and said. "Well, the next time I see mine, I'm going to pin him to the wall! How's that make you feel?"

Chat met her glare with one of his own. "I'm gonna make out for an hour!"

"I'm making out for two! With tongue!" They were inches from each other at this point.

"I'm grabbing her butt!" He shouted.

"I'll let him grope a boob if I want!" She screamed.

Both of them stopped cold. Admittedly, this conversation had derailed a while ago.

They each stepped back and looked away, blushing madly.

"So," Chat said in a casual voice, grabbing his cane. "I'll take the north side."

"Yes, good. You do that," Marinette said, still beet red. "I'll hit the south."

She looked over her shoulder. "Sorry about that," she said.

He looked back and smiled. "Yeah, it's cool. No biggie."

They took off, each of them focused on things they weren't quite sure about anymore.

It did not take long for Marinette to make good on her threats. That Sunday, Adrien had come over for dinner. This went as well as could be expected in the Dupain-Cheng household, but at least Marinette had the foresight to reign her parents in ahead of time.

They, of course, did not listen.

"My little girl," Tom said, sobbing at the table over a plate of absolutely exquisite meatballs. "All grown up and being courted! You are quite the lucky man to be in her favor, yes indeed."

Marinette buried her face in her hands while her mother kept offering Adrien more greens.

"A virile dish for a virile young man," she sang.

"Uh, thank you?" Adrien said, taking the veggies.

Marinette's face slammed into the table. "Please stop," she muttered.

"No," her mother said with a smile.

Seriously, the meatballs were just fantastic.

Afterwards, she and Adrien had gone to her room to play video games. After twenty minutes of her parents continually popping in, she finally shot a desperate look to her mother, who finally nodded in understanding. Sabine grabbed Tom and led him downstairs.

"But, they might want some more pastries!" He said as she led him away.

"Not now, dear." Sabine said.

"What will they do without a good supply of snacks?"

Sabine sighed as she dragged him down the hall. "I'll show you."

"…Oh."

For the record, they went about 87 minutes.

And yes, he did.

And yes, she did.

And some more for good measure. Use your imagination.

Eventually, they wound up cuddled together in a lump of limbs and clothing, watching a movie on her laptop. She stretched after a bit and decided that due to dehydration, this was as good a time as any to grab a juice. So, she politely slipped away, haphazardly reapplying any missing articles of clothing she could find.

No, I will not say how many. This isn't quite that kind of story. However, she was hopped up on sugar and had been waiting for this night for a long ass time, so she might have had to hunt for a while.

As she adjusted her top and made her way softly downstairs to the kitchen, she considered how much effort it would take to sew the tears that had been made to the front of her shirt. Her mind was distracted as she opened the fridge, moved a container of milk, reached past Plagg, grabbed the juice, put back the milk…

Wait.

Wait a fucking second.

Marinette froze as she stared at the kwami, who was in the process of finishing off her father's cheese plate.

They locked eyes for a good ten seconds.

"What's up?" He said. He took another bite of cheese.