The avertable inevitability

Zelda Bosphorus Hyrule the seventy second was born to the death tolls of a girl who never got the chance to live.

A self-insert fic.

A END AND A BEGINNING

I remembered a time before.

Before who i am now and before what i am now.

It was… full. I was loved and cherished. I was fearful. I was scared. I was happy. I was sad. stress, expectation and time weighed down upon my shoulders but I loved and was loved fully and deeply. A mother who was a constant support in my life, a brother who was a dear friend and a father who never quite knew how to interact with me. who sometimes felt like sandpaper upon my skin but whose love I never doubted. I was loved. I had more love then I knew what to do with. I had an overbearing but loving aunt, a cousin who was like a sister, a kind uncle, a wise grandmother who I looked up to, an insanely clever grandfather who always made me laugh, and even more family and friends beyond that. My life had been full of happiness and laughter, sadness and despair, and then… it all disappeared.

With a single crack a sharp pain and a shout it was all gone just like that.

And just like that it was the end of my before. my old hope and happiness, and the beginning of my now.

Zelda Bosphorus Hyrule the seventy second was born to the death tolls of a girl who never got the chance to live.

I remember a warm comforting -Stifling- darkness muffled voices and lullabies. Most of my time spent in the darkness was morning, panicking, and sleeping. My greatest fear had always been isolation and confinement. To be utterly alone and trapped. No one and nothing to interact with just myself and my own mind, suffering in silence. The moment I awoke in this dark place I knew that I had died and that I would never see my family again. It hurt.

Like a scar on my soul, I cherished my family; they had been my whole world and now they were gone and I was alone. It was not my best period i'll admit, if it would have been possible in those first few months I would have just stopped. I would have given up and died again just in the hope I would get to see them again. I spent 9 months trapped in a strangely comfortable hell as much of an oxymoron as that sounds. My only salvation was the noises I could hear from outside of my own personal hell.

A warm kind voice who would sing quite lullabies to me. There were other voices that I would hear, muffled voices speaking words I couldn't quite make out, but hers was the most clear. The constant steady heartbeat that surrounded me. a soothing sound that comforted me in my tiny prison.

By the time that 9 months had past I had come to terms with the fact that I wouldn't be able to see my family again I had gone through all the differing stages of grief and had tenuous grasp upon my own sanity and acceptance of that fact that this is how things were now i had my self, the voice, and the heart beat and that would have to be good enough.

And as if that clarity had been a cue, suddenly I was free.

Well not suddenly I had to go through the whole birth thing, which for the record was unpleasant to say the least, I will admit that I panicked when my already tight prison started to constrict on me and the warm safe voice started screaming. I had guessed that I had reincarnated and knew eventually I would be sprung from my warm fleshy prison. but knowing something intellectually and actually being forced out of the birth canal while my new mother screamed and the voices around her panicked were two entirely separate things.

But nevertheless I was suddenly free and the world was blinding. Everything was all too much there was light where there had been darkness, the air was cold and harsh on my skin, and it was all too loud with nothing to muffle the voices chattering around me rough hands were holding me and I was wiped down and swaddled with fabric that was painful on my new skin. It was all too much and I couldn't help but scream my protest and fear to the world, that too hurt my new infant ears but I was too scared to stop. It was all too much too fast and I didn't have my warm voice or my heartbeat and I was scared and nothing made sense and I wanted it to all STOP!

I was settled onto a warm chest next to a heartbeat and the warm soothing voice spoke. I didn't understand her. I was much too overwrought to even begin to attempt to comprehend what she was saying but I had my heart beat and soothing voice back, and that would have to be enough.

I fell asleep to the sound of my new mother's heartbeat and her soothing voice.