Less hungover writing this one, and our boys finally do the deed! I listened to Your Song by Elton John on a constant loop during this.

If you like, please leave a review!

R x

The snow was falling thick and fast on the grounds around the Potter family home, the trees were bare in the small orchard and the paddock where James and Sirius often practiced Quidditch was frozen solid. Back at home it was also a lot harder to ignore the feeling of war and uncertainty that had gripped the world outside Hogwarts. Mr Potter often disappeared behind a copy of the Daily Prophet as soon as it arrived in the mornings, and Mrs Potter was even more affectionate and emotional than usual. She had met James and Sirius at Kings Cross station with tears in her eyes and her hands fretfully wrung together.

Despite the feeling of heavy anxiety hanging in the air, and the constant flow of people in and out of the Potter mansion to meet with Mr Potter privately in his study, Sirius was pining. Pining hard. Like, so hard that the motherfucking awesome cool amazing motorbike that Mr and Mrs Potter had presented to him on Christmas morning had only just made him return to his usual self for a few hours. Unfortunately for all the other inhabitants on the Potter household, Sirius's pining did not involve him moping or staring longingly into space, but instead meant that was often running hyper round the house wrecking a lot of havoc. James could not complain, joining Sirius in his mischief distracted him from missing Lily and allowed Mr and Mrs Potter to forget about their nervous states of mind for several hours at a time.

Realistically, Sirius was missing Remus so fucking much that it left a physical ache in his chest. If he stopped to think about it for long, he wanted to rip his own hair out because his thoughts got too dark to deal with. The atmosphere at James's house was not the usual happy-go-lucky vibe it used to be, with little laughs and smiles coming from Mr and Mrs Potter. The truth was that Sirius needed Remus to balance him out, to make him feel like he was not constantly teetering on the edge of the insanity that had taken most of the Black family. And the constant anxiety he was surrounded by increased this tenfold. So, he let off steam and energy the only way he knew how.

Thankfully, Remus was arriving the next day for the Potter's annual New Year's Eve Party and would be staying there for the remainder of their Christmas holidays. Peter was not joining them until the day of the party as he was obligingly having to spend Christmas with his aunt and uncle. Lily was also arriving with Remus, but only staying until the party.

Sirius was polishing his bike, taking extra care over the handlebars whilst James sat on the old sofa with stuffing pouring out of it, reading a letter from an old uncle, and absentmindedly playing with a snitch. Music was blasting from a gramophone in the corner of the garage and the cold winter air was being kept at bay by the magically produced fires James and Sirius had conjured around the place. Sirius straightened up, admiring his work and wiping a bead of sweat from his forehead; he ran his hands through his hair to brush it away from his face then turned to grab a rag to wipe his hands on.

Just then the sound of crunching footsteps approaching could be heard from outside. Sirius shot James a look and James met it, the Snitch still and clutched tightly in his hand. Sirius's heart jumped to his throat, the feeling of caution that had been ground into him for the last week and a half arising within him like a tidal wave. He swallowed thickly and grabbed his wand in his hand. James got off the sofa and matched Sirius's stance.

'On the count of three,' James whispered, his voice close to Sirius's side. Sirius nodded his agreement.

'One, two, three…'

Sirius and James burst out the side door of the garage and ran straight into the intruders, colliding so hard that they all went tumbling to the ground in a tangle of limbs.

'Padfoot – arrghh –

'James -!'

'Padfoot – ooph – what are you doing?!'

Sirius stopped his squirming and held himself up on his elbows, looking down and finding himself face to face with his delightful, incredible, slightly ruffled boyfriend.

'Moony!' Sirius exclaimed, and before he could even think about what he was doing, or who might be watching, he dropped his mouth onto Remus's and kissed him hard.

'You guys, I have seen this too many times now. I'm going to have to wash my eyes with soap to get the image away soon.'

Lily's voice registered with Sirius and he lifted his face from Remus's, taking in the sight of his boyfriend's amused expression from beneath him. Remus's cheeks and nose were pink from the cold and his hair was sprayed out against the white snow. Remus brought his hand up and traced a line above Sirius's eyebrows, his eyes following.

'You have grease on your forehead,' Remus said.

'You weren't supposed to be here until tomorrow,' Sirius replied.

'We thought we'd surprise you a day early,' Remus said with a smile on his face. 'What we didn't realise was surprise meant being ambushed. And our efforts will mean nothing if I catch a cold and die because you kept me pinned down on snowy grass.'

Sirius grinned, planted another kiss on Remus's lips, then got to his feet. He held his hand out to help Remus up too, then turned to see James and Lily already on their feet, their arms hugging tightly round each other. All Sirius wanted to do was hold Remus to his chest, but he thought he had already been brazen enough. He settled with merely standing close enough to Remus so that their shoulders were touching, and he lightly brushed his fingertips to the inside of Remus's wrist.

'Sorry about that Moony,' James said. 'Mum and Dad have had us on edge. It's been mental since we've been home, always talking about this war. I swear Mum has hugged me more in a week and a half than she has my whole life.'

'I know what you mean,' Remus nodded in understanding. 'My Mum and Dad have been the same, and they're constantly talking about me being extra vigilant. Apparently, Voldemort is recruiting werewolves into his ranks, promising them a better life for whenever he wins.'

'Even my parents know something is going on, and they're Muggles,' Lily added.

The others continued talking but Sirius frowned hard at what Remus had said, about how potentially dangerous werewolves on Voldemort's side could be. Not just because they would most likely be convinced to act as feral as they possibly could, which Sirius knew from his experience with Remus just how perilous that could be. Sirius knew it was a daily struggle for Remus to keep the wolf at bay; albeit, it was harder when the full moon was closer and as Remus had been mixed with humans for so long it had been made easier for him to not indulge the wolf. But still, Sirius worried for his boyfriend, about him being kidnapped, him being snatched away from right under his nose. He worried about how much his parents were involved in werewolf kidnapping, he worried about Regulus…

'Right, fuck, I can't talk about this a moment longer,' Sirius cut across something James was saying, and he gripped Remus's wrist in a vice like grip. He ran his free hand through his hair and could feel his eyes spinning about wildly. He knew he probably appeared crazy to his friends, but he was not even ashamed. He could feel his mind free-falling steadily into insanity. But then –

'Sirius,' Remus's voice was warm and comforting, like a blanket being fit snugly around his shoulders. 'Sirius, you're shivering.'

'I'm fine,' Sirius said and turned his head to meet Remus's hazel eyes searching his own with concern. 'I'm fine. I just want to forget it's happening for a few more days. Let's just go get some hot butter beer?'

'A great idea, I'm bloody freezing,' James said, skipping over what had just happened. He secured his arm around Lily's shoulders and directed them back up the sloping lawn to the large house that sat on top of the hill.

Remus really had to marvel at the beauty of the Potter's house. It was big enough for each of the Marauders to have a room to themselves when they came to stay. Although, he cursed himself that the first night somewhere slightly unfamiliar always kept him up. As he stared up at the ceiling of his bedroom, his thoughts strayed to Sirius. He had managed to cover up whatever had happened when they had arrived and had quickly snapped back to his usual self, cracking jokes and messing about with James. But Remus could not ignore the way Sirius's smile did not quite reach his eyes and when he wasn't joking about, his features often settled into a frown. Remus could tell Sirius was tense, and he had not seen his boyfriend this way since before he had ran away from Grimmauld Place.

Remus heard a floorboard outside his room creak, and he could sense Sirius before he saw him. Sirius edged the door to Remus's bedroom open slowly and tilted his head round to check and see if he was sleeping. His lips quirked into a small smile when he saw Remus staring at him, closed the door silently behind him and Remus pulled the cover of the bed down so Sirius could jump in beside him.

'I missed you,' Sirius hummed, snuggling his face into Remus's neck whilst Remus tightened his arms around Sirius's back. He started tracing lines up and down his spine and smiled into Sirius's hair.

'I missed you too,' Remus said.

Sirius pulled his head back and kissed Remus deeply and sweetly for a moment. Despite his concern, Remus felt himself relax, felt himself practically melt into Sirius's touch because the truth was, he had so deeply missed Sirius that he could hardly bear to think about it while they had been apart. When he had seen Sirius that afternoon, with grease above his eyebrow and a slight coating of sweat on his forehead, he was not sure he had ever seen anything so perfect. The way Sirius's cream jumper clung to his shoulders and back, how his blue jeans sat so snugly on his hips and thighs, was so breathtakingly wonderful to Remus that he had almost forgotten how much he physically missed his boyfriend. And now, with Sirius cuddled in close to his chest, despite the tenseness and the imminent threat, the universe seemed to align again.

'Everything is different Moony,' Sirius said quietly. 'Nothing is going to be the same again.'

'Maybe, but we don't know for sure yet,' Remus said.

'I'm finding this all… difficult? I don't really know how to explain it.'

Remus tightened his arms around Sirius and kept quiet, knowing from seven years of experience that Sirius would only talk on his own accord.

'Just all this anxiety, all this worry coming from Mr and Mrs Potter, I feel like I can't relax. A-and what you said earlier – the werewolf thing – I don't know, I just can't stop thinking about it. About you. How dangerous this is, about how they could take you away if we're not careful. It's scary, Remus – like m-my father –' Sirius swallowed thickly, ' – was only the tip of the iceberg. These people are barbaric, they're maniacs. And I think what's scaring me more, I can feel my mind slipping, I can feel it going dark. The more I feel this unease over war, the more I feel the presence of all this dark magic, Remus, I can feel my mind going dark with it.'

Remus had tears blurring his vision. He traced the jagged scar that ran from the top of Sirius's right shoulder, down his back to his left hip. Remus knew it was not a Quidditch injury as Sirius so often pretended and that it had been given to him the night he ran away from his family home. Sirius hardly ever spoke about the Black household, or about his knowledge of dark magic. Remus knew Sirius had grown up with it, he knew Sirius would be able to spot dark magic quicker than most Slytherins could, and Remus knew this knowledge would always play on Sirius's mind in the way it was now. Most wizards could not harbour such information and not have it drive them crazy.

'You help me so much,' Sirius said. 'Just you, being here, being with me. I just relax completely.'

'I know,' Remus whispered. 'You do the same for me. Any time that I'm stressed and I feel the wolf, I just think of you and I calm down, it goes away.'

Sirius shifted so that his elbow was propping him up. He brushed Remus's hair off his forehead and cupped the side of his face.

'I am never leaving you,' Sirius said softly.

'Well good, because you're stuck with me too.'

Remus was so relieved when Sirius's face relaxed into a grin and he leaned down to kiss Remus. The kiss deepened and Remus decided to not worry about the war, not until they had finished Hogwarts. The upcoming war was foreshadowing their future, their impending adulthood. Remus did not want his mind to think about how they were tumbling head-first into this new normal once they finished school. He did not want to entertain the thought that they may not all make it through, that it was likely one or more of them would be lost. All Remus wanted to do was lie in bed and kiss his hot, sexy, fantastic boyfriend.

Mrs Potter had outdone herself once again with her New Year's Eve Party. The Potter house was full to the brim with everyone who was someone in the wizarding world. There was much laughter and smiles and chatter filling the house to bursting. People's glasses were clinking in toasts to the new year and old friends were reuniting, hugging, and placing kisses on cheeks. Others were dancing in groups, giggly couples clinging to each other as the drink flowed steadily. Peter had disappeared into the crowd with a girl Sirius vaguely recognised from the year below them at Hogwarts, and James was proudly parading Lily around the house, introducing her to various relatives. Sirius and Remus stood together at the side of the room, leaning against the wall with their shoulders touching ever so slightly.

'Wish I could show you off like Prongs is showing Evans off,' Sirius huffed and finished off the bottle of butterbeer he was holding.

'Relax Padfoot, we'll be back at Hogwarts and back to privacy soon.'

'In the meantime, I must say you look fucking hot in that outfit,' Sirius said, giving Remus an appreciative glance and feeling a giddy rush to the head when he saw Remus blush.

'Not so bad yourself either, you mutt,' Remus bounced his shoulder against Sirius's.

James and Lily appeared in front of them, Lily's cheeks flushed slightly and her eyes sparkling. James had his arm protectively around her shoulders, his face showing the same effects of firewhiskey. As if to confirm Sirius's suspicions, Lily gave a slight hiccough and burst into a fit of laughter.

'You feeling okay there Lily?' Remus asked.

'I'm wonderful Remus, and I must say you are looking absolutely dashing in those clothes tonight,' Lily said, grinning happily and slipping out from under James's arm to hug Remus's waist.

'You're looking lovely yourself Lily,' Remus laughed, hugging her back.

'Mate don't go stealing my girlfriend!' James exclaimed, stumbling slightly so that Sirius had to steady him. 'You're all my best friends though, and you know Padfoot, I'm so fucking happy you live with me mate. I mean that.' James's face was an inch from Sirius's and he was jamming his forefinger into Sirius's chest with every word. He had his other arm slung roughly round Sirius's neck in what Sirius assumed James thought was affection but was actually slightly more like a headlock.

'Cheers Prongs. Maybe next time you say that you can not slur your words and spit in my face,' Sirius said, amused at his friend's state.

'Lads,' Peter exclaimed, hurrying over to them, slightly pink in the face, 'Mary snogged me. Like I mean full frontal, not backing down, all in your face type snog!'

'Yes Wormy!' James shouted, grabbing Peter's shoulders with his free arm and slopping drink over the carpet.

Sirius did not want to bring up the fact that snogging was not perhaps something to be shouting about, not whenever Sirius had a delicious boyfriend he liked to devour at every opportunity he had. He looked over at said boyfriend, his chest feeling light and happy with amusement at Peter. Remus was laughing happily as Lily snorted with merriment into his chest, holding onto him so that she would not fall over. Sirius was still struggling to support an extremely drunk James when Remus caught his eye and they both simultaneously burst into laughter. Mrs Potter came rushing over, brandishing a camera and slightly unsteady on her own feet too. She snapped the picture and Sirius was feeling so ridiculously happy in that instant that all lingering anxieties of war and suffering were driven from his mind.

James and Lily soon dispersed to go and get more alcohol and Peter vanished once more in search of Mary and some mistletoe. Though still slightly giddy from his friends' antics, Sirius felt a strange longing for more as he caught Remus's eye as they all left. Sirius checked the time and saw it was coming up to eleven o'clock, then was struck with a sudden, brilliant idea. He touched Remus's arm.

'You wanna get out of here and have some privacy when the clock strikes twelve?'

Sirius watched Remus's Adam's apple bob as he swallowed and then nodded wordlessly. Sirius grinned, watching his plan play out in mind's eye and held onto Remus's wrist as he guided them unnoticed through the party. They reached the front door and the bang of it closing behind them was drowned out by the loud music and chatter. The cold air hit Sirius's face instantly and he immediately felt elevated as snow fell silently around them. He felt a tingling sensation flow through him and he changed into Padfoot with a faint pop. He pranced through the snow, digging his nose into the frozen substance and throwing it around himself, delighting in how Remus laughed at his actions.

He changed back to himself and grabbed hold of Remus's hand, the light from the house providing a big enough beam to guide them down the lawn to the garage. The sounds of the party followed them, of distant music and continuous laughter and enjoyment. When they reached the garage, Sirius flicked his wand to procure several fires to heat the room and to turn the lights on.

'I haven't shown you my Christmas present from the Potters yet,' Sirius grinned and stepped forward to pull back the dust sheet covering his bike.

Remus's mouth dropped open.

'I am never getting on that thing with you.'

Sirius threw his head back in laughter and walked back towards Remus again. He put his hands on Remus's hips and nudged Remus's nose with the tip of his own. Remus wound his arms around Sirius's neck, his fingers naturally curling into his hair. Sirius kissed Remus intensely, making something in the pit of his stomach twist pleasantly.

'You know I would never put you in harm's way,' Sirius had meant it jokingly, but it came out much more serious.

'I know,' Remus breathed, looking so deeply into Sirius's eyes that Sirius felt he could see his soul.

'I want to –' Sirius broke away and walked over to the gramophone, putting on a muggle record that he had got in muggle London one day. He went and sat on the sofa, holding out his hands for Remus to come and join him. The music filled up the room, the slow notes of a piano and then romantic lyrics filling the silence.

Remus sat beside him and Sirius pulled him close, resuming their kiss from moments before. Everything disappeared as they sat together. Sirius was not sure they had ever kissed like that, if he had ever felt such a deep, deep longing for Remus. His heart was hammering, aching hard against his chest. He could feel his insides squirming and his hands clammy as he reached up under Remus's shirt, pulling it off over his head.

How wonderful life is, while you're in the world.

Sirius leant back and looked at Remus. His boyfriend's lids were heavy, and his lips swollen and pink from so much kissing. His eyes travelled down, taking in the broad expanse of Remus's chest, of the many scars covering it. He reached a hand out and, with slightly shaking fingers, gently touched the crescent shaped scar that would never heal on Remus's shoulder.

Remus sucked in a breath. Sirius retracted his hand immediately.

'I'm sorry, I didn't mean –'

'No,' Remus said, 'no, it's okay.'

He took Sirius's hand and put it back to the scar, and he kept his hand on top of Sirius's as he traced all the others criss-crossing over Remus's chest. Sirius had seen Remus naked possibly hundreds of times at this point, but this night felt so much different from all the others. With the slow song in the background and having Remus let him touch scars that were so painful and personal to him. This was different, Sirius was sure of it. He felt connected to Remus in a way he never had, and that meant a lot considering he already thought they were connected in every way possible.

And then they were kissing again, quicker, and messier than they had been before. Their hands were shaking and slipping over each other's bodies, removing their clothes, grabbing hair, kissing down chests. Sirius was not sure he had ever been so obsessed with any one person and their body. To him, Remus was so wonderful. His shoulders were not as broad as Sirius's, and he still had the impression of a lanky teenager, with his long legs and spindly fingers. But Sirius loved Remus. He loved Remus's fingers and how softly they could touch and comfort him. He loved Remus's legs stretching out underneath him. He loved Remus's neck and that glorious sweet spot that made Remus make such delicious sounds whenever Sirius pressed his lips there.

And then they were on the floor naked and Sirius was on top of Remus, his legs straddling his boyfriend's hips. Their foreheads were pressed together, slightly sweating, and slightly out of breath. Remus's hands were again tangled among Sirius's hair and Sirius's hands were cupping Remus's face. Sirius did not want to stop kissing Remus ever ever ever.

'Sirius –' Remus voice was muffled by Sirius kissing him. 'Sirius, wait.'

Sirius pulled back and looked back at Remus again. Remus's eyes were wide, and his cheeks were flushed. Sirius had a sudden flashback to three days earlier when he had him pressed down against the snow and how delighted he had felt to see Remus. That somehow felt like a million years ago, and this was so much more serious.

'Are we going to d-do this?' Remus was breathing hard.

Sirius sucked in a steadying breath, trying to make his brain function.

'Only if you're ready, Moony,' Sirius whispered, resting his forehead on Remus's.

'I am, as long as you are,' Remus said.

Sirius blinked. As nervous as he was, he was so ready. 'I am.'

'What do we – you know,' Remus said.

Sirius reluctantly sat up and leant against his heels. He grabbed his wand from his jeans and held it in his sweaty hand.

'Okay so I'm hoping this works, I read in in one of those dirty magazines you tell me off for having.'

Remus huffed out a laugh that turned to a gasp as Sirius performed the spell. Sirius took that as a yes that it had worked. He shifted position so that he was between Remus's legs. He looked back up at his boyfriend who was looking so beautiful in the low light.

'You're sure?'

'Yes.'

Sirius pressed down and went slow. Remus let out a low moan that sounded so brilliant to Sirius's ears that he simply had to lean over to kiss Remus again. He grabbed Remus's hands and pushed them down on the floor either side on Remus's head, linking their fingers together.

A little while later, as they finished, with gasps of I love you's and messy kisses and arms holding each other tightly, they heard the muffled sounds of a countdown from ten. The countdown reached the end, as cheers and whoops and loud music erupted from the house not far from them. Sirius thought he had never felt so happy, so content and blissful in his entire life. Sweaty limbs entangled with sweaty limbs, his heartbeat starting to steady as Remus whispered a happy New Year into his hair, which Sirius returned with a kiss. And as the record returned to the point it had begun, with slow notes of a piano and then romantic lyrics, Sirius loved Remus.

How wonderful life is, while you're in the world.