Why She Left

"I've had it. I have had it, Charlie. I know I need a new partner. I know she's not coming back. But I have had it with the blond twinkies showing up, thinking they can replace her." Rick Hunter paced in his captain's office, obviously upset.

"You cannot go out in the streets by yourself, Hunter. The city can't afford it and I don't want it. You know she wouldn't want it either." Charlie Devane tried to reason with him, but in truth, only one person had ever gotten Rick Hunter to see reason.

"Okay, but why's it gotta be a girl? I don't want another female partner." He paused. "None of them are her and, if they were, do you know what she went through?" He tried to control his emotion as he thought of McCall's rape and various shootings. "What I watched her go through and most of the time I couldn't do a damn thing about it? Female cops are all well and good but I do not want another female partner." He resisted the urge to add 'they're not her' again for good measure.

"You know you're not the easiest person in the world to pair up as it is. I wouldn't be putting stipulations on it. You're not going out into the field again until you get a new partner. That's all there is to it." Charlie sighed, feeling like he was arguing with a brick wall.

Hunter stared off at the wall, his voice lowering a bit. "I know she wasn't perfect. But she was perfect for me. I couldn't have asked for better. I know…I know there will never be another McCall. But there's gotta be another partner out there that's better than the last two I've gotten. If I've gotta have another partner, less blonde twinkie, more…brass cupcake."

Charlie nodded with a slight smile at the term. "I miss her too. We all do. But you're…"

Hunter frowned, lifting his gaze, focusing it back on his boss and friend. "I'm what?"

"You're the reason she left."

*****

Rick saw the house go up into flames. He'd left to chase the suspect he was after, but he scanned the yard and he didn't see his partner. Could it be possible she was still in there? The flames and smoke were too much for him to see through. Not wanting to take a second longer to guess and risk her life by being wrong, he ran back into the flames. He saw her, on the floor in one of the bedrooms, motionless.

"McCall. C'mon, McCall, this is no time for a nap. Wake up." He tried to joke, but his eyes couldn't quite make it. "Forgive me for this." He wet his shirt, wrapping it around her as best as he could to protect her, lifted her into his arms, and ran out at top speed.

Coughing, he managed to sit up from where they'd fallen on the grass. "DeeDee?" She had some burns; maybe she'd inhaled too much smoke. "C'mon, it's me. Open your eyes. DeeDee?" Now that the adrenaline was over, all he felt was fear. Why wasn't she waking up?

Hunter sat alone at the hospital, terrified, defeated. It didn't matter that they'd caught the scum, all that mattered to him was her. They'd started the oxygen when they were still in the field and Hunter had refused to let go of her. He'd held her hand and talked to her the entire ride to the hospital, but she hadn't responded once. What he would give for her to open her eyes and smile. Then the doctors had taken her, wouldn't let him go with her, something he never got used to. A thousand questions flooded his mind so that they all seemed so jumbled, but the two that stood out the most was why had he left her and why wasn't she waking up? He replayed the last few days in his head, looking for any sign, any clue, as to what had happened; nothing stood out.

Charlie hurried in, looking as worried as Hunter, minus the scared and lost feelings the younger man was having. "Did the doctors say anything yet?" Charlie asked, even as he knew the truth. If McCall was through with the doctors, Hunter would have been with her.

"Not yet." He stood. "It's my fault, Charlie. I shoulda stayed with her. I shoulda…"

"You were chasing a suspect. You and McCall have broken like that a thousand times. Besides, she never would have forgiven you for it." Despite her diminutive size, the female cop was every bit as stubborn and determined as her partner. She would have never let him abandon their task to check on her.

"I know it. I just…I don't know, Charlie. I've got a bad feeling this time." He much would have rather been shot any day of the week then watch her go through any pain, but this time, as so many before, he didn't get that choice.

The nurse finally came out, looking for Hunter. "She's asking for you, but there's some things I thought you needed to know. She passed out both because of the smoke and because her blood sugar levels were dangerously low, so we're keeping her here overnight for observation. But she'll be fine and the baby is fine too; they were very lucky. I won't keep you any longer; I'll let you go back before she goes to sleep again."

"Baby?" Charlie and Hunter said almost at the same time.

"You mean she's pregnant?" Hunter asked, giving him a further thing to think about, making him feel like his head would explode. He had to get back there, had to talk to her, to make sense of any of it, much less all of it.

"I thought you know. Yes, she's pregnant, seven weeks. We need to keep her for observation, but you can go back." She showed the two men where McCall's room was and left them.

Charlie's face was getting red, a sure sign he was anything but happy. "I knew you two pulled some dumb stunts in your time, but this?" He shook his head. "This ends now. Right now."

Hunter turned to look at him. "What do you think ends now?"

"She cannot go out into the field while she's pregnant. She could have lost the baby. And your focus cannot solely be on protecting her."

"My focus is ALWAYS on McCall. She's my partner. I am not losing her." Hunter was awake now, finally.

Charlie rambled on, not listening to anything Hunter was trying to say, "I don't know who the father is. I don't care who the father is. I cannot believe you allowed her to do…"

"Charlie." McCall's voice was quiet, but easily heard by both men who stopped fighting. "Hunter doesn't allow me to do anything. I'm a grown woman and make my own choices." She had to stop for a rest, still pale. "You do know who the father is. Whether you choose to believe that or not is your business."

"DeeDee…" Hunter looked worried at how frail she looked, although she sounded just like his partner.

"He didn't know, Charlie. I didn't tell him. I hadn't figured things out yet. But I will tell you this, you owe him an apology. He has never done anything but try, sometimes in his own misguided way, to protect me." She started coughing again and she couldn't stop. Hunter helped her to sit up and rubbed her back, his eyes solely on her, Charlie forgotten.

"I meant what I said. You can't go into the field until after the baby's born, McCall. But…congratulations. I'm really happy for you." Charlie said softly, leaving them alone.

McCall wiped away some ashes and soot from Hunter's tired, worn face. "How long was I out?"

"A few hours." He helped her sip some water to help with her throat. "You scared the hell out of me." He brushed some hair off her face and kissed her forehead.

"Are you okay?" Her bright eyes searched his own, more worried about him than she was herself.

"Yeah. I'm okay. Now, I'm okay." He smiled for her. "You really told Charlie off."

"You know he's right, don't you? You're gonna have to get another partner, at least for a little while."

He sighed. "Nine months isn't a little while." It felt like an eternity. "How long have you known?"

"Since I got my physical. I was going to tell you, but then we got this case…" She trailed off, looking tired. "Be happy for me? Please?"

"I'm happy. I just…I don't want to lose you."

She took his hand in her own. "You won't."

*****

Rick let himself into his house and stood by the door, smelling the aroma filling the house. Every day was a new experience and, to be honest, he could get used to it. Tonight's attempt at keeping herself busy seemed to be an Italian dish: spaghetti, lasagna, maybe? Definitely not cold pizza. He followed his nose to where his partner was, watching her for a few minutes with a smile. This was definitely the best part of his day, not catching the suspects and definitely not Novak walking out.

McCall slowly turned and smiled back at him. "What?"

He took in the sight of his partner, his eyes stopping on the eighth month swelling of their daughter in her womb. He was enthralled with the idea of both spending the rest of his life with one woman and being a daddy, two things he always swore he never wanted to do. "You're always the best part of my day. You know that, right?"

She nodded. "And you're the best part of mine, but…" She studied him, knowing there was more to this. "What did you do?"

He shook his head, taking a seat at the bar where he could be near her although the chairs at the table were more comfortable. "Chris walked out."

Her face fell. "Damn, Hunter. I'm sorry."

"Then Charlie and I had a fight cause I told him I didn't want another female partner." He could see her blood boil. "There's nothing wrong with female cops. I've dated enough of them. And I love one. I just…"

McCall saw what he was trying not to say. "You know I wasn't perfect, right? That there are others out there that might be better suited for you? Workwise?"

"You were perfect for me, DeeDee. Still are." He smiled at that. "You know…you never really answered Charlie's question."

"You don't think with us living together, he's figured it out?" She saw the look on his face. "No. No, Rick, I can't." She paused. "If something happened and you know it's happened before, if both of us…" She shook her head. "I want to be a cop. But I don't think I can work homicide anymore and I definitely can't be your partner at work anymore. I won't leave our daughter to be raised by someone else."

Hunter knew she was right and slowly admitted such. "I'll try harder." He knew she liked having time to do what she never got around to when they were working and wished that, if she wouldn't be his partner anymore, she could stay home with their child. He also knew she would never go for it. He kissed her forehead, his hands on her stomach, feeling the baby move and kick, "I promise," he told them both.