No Matter How I Look at it, it's you Guys'

Fault I Died and Ended up in this World

"Holy Crap!"

Tomoko Kuroki awoke in a cold sweat, and found herself in the middle of a wheat field, under a starlit sky.

"Huh?! What?!" Confusion filled her mind. She had vague recollections of some life-shattering event, so why was she here? She felt her face. "Didn't I get hit by a car or something? Wait, don't tell me…"

Kuroki checked her surroundings. A cluster of rectangular buildings and thatched roofs loomed off in the distance. Definitely a medieval European village, or some kind of fantasy knockoff. Not only that, but Kuroki found herself garbed in mage robes and cap. There was even a wooden staff lying nearby.

"Yep…" Kuroki pretty much had the gist of it. She'd seen it enough times before. "Looks like I died and was reborn in another world as some kind of hero."

But it really wasn't as great as it sounded. She got depressed for a while, but since that wasn't really productive, she decided to get angry instead. "Damn it! Anime and light novels are always making this scenario look good, but it's always a medieval setting, right? Didn't life basically suck back then? No plumbing, which means no working toilets, just outhouses. Everyone throws their garbage onto the streets, so it stinks. The food was bland. And everyone basically worked all day just to get by… Even if I get the hero treatment… this still totally sucks!"

Kuroki bit down on her thumbnail. "I shouldn't have died and ended up here! Damn that driver! Driving so recklessly like that! What, did your brakes fail?! Well, that's why you're supposed to get your vehicle serviced regularly!"

Grumbling, Kuroki thought back to the accident. She'd been together with a group of her friends, going to a café. She hadn't even wanted to go, but she'd gotten dragged along. They'd been crossing the street when Kuroki heard tires screeching and looked toward the cross section. Some idiot driver spun out of control and barreled right for them. Kuroki barely had enough time to react. Her friend Nemoto had been right in front of her, so she'd reached out shoved her as hard as she could. Then the car had struck her and sent her flying. She still remembered that part. As well as the next agonizing three minutes. "Tsk! Couldn't even get a clean hit! I didn't want to have to go out bleeding like that!" For some reason, it felt like she'd forgotten something… Like, just before getting hit, she remembered something warm… And getting tackled. Before she could remember that, Nemoto's teary face popped into her mind. She'd been trying to say something, but Kuroki hadn't been able to hear anything, like she'd gone deaf or something.

"Damn that Nemo! I can't believe I died for that b****! Why didn't you try first aid, instead of just screaming at me?! Wait… Did she?! Like, mouth-to-mouth…?" She wasn't sure if it was just her imagination or what, but she did seem to remember something like that. "Heh heh heh… If these are my last memories, maybe I can go on with no lingering attachments after all…" Kuroki calmed down a bit after letting off some steam, and after fantasizing a bit. "Still, Nemo really should have taken some classes before trying it. Wait, if I hadn't pushed her out of the way, would she be here instead of me? She'd probably be happy about that, since she wanted to live her life like an anime. She did say slice of life anime. But I guess some Isekai are like that, like As*endance of a B*okworm. Well, I guess if I hadn't pushed her out of the way, we both would have died. Not like I was that far behind her. But then maybe I wouldn't have woken up alone in this field…"

Kuroki glanced around. She shivered, and hugged herself. "It's lonely here…"

"Wait a minute! Isn't a group of mages supposed to greet me or something?! And be all, 'You're the chosen hero summoned from another world!' Or, like, a goddess tells me to save the world and grants me one favor? What the hell is up with this field setup in the middle of nowhere?!"

"Ugh…"

"Eeep!" Kuroki jumped when some nearby wheat stalks rustled. Kuroki recognized the gloomy girl who emerged. "What the?! Yuri?!"

"Tomoko?" Yuri rubbed her head and grimaced from a headache. "W-What happened?"

"Uh… Dunno. I guess we died and we're in another world? Heh heh heh…" Kuroki grinned nervously and rubbed the back of her head.

"That car?" Yuri asked.

"Yeah. You got hit too?"

"I was right behind you…" Yuri sounded angry, like she thought Kuroki should have known that.

"Oh…" Kuroki was ticked-off by Yuri's tone.

"Tomoko…" Yuri looked serious. "Why'd you push Nemoto-san out of the way instead of me?"

"What?!" Kuroki was incredulous. "Because I didn't know you were behind me, idiot! Don't act like this is some kind of popularity contest where I only save my closest friend, and I chose Nemo over you!" She only thought this of course. The meek reply she gave back was, "Oh, uh… Nemo was in front of me, I guess. And there wasn't time to react."

Yuri didn't seem satisfied, so Kuroki tried a joke: "But look, at least we're together, right? I'd rather be stuck in this world with you instead of Nemo. Heh heh heh…"

"I guess…" Disinterested, Yuri glanced around. "Is it just us?"

"Yeah. Seems like it."

Yuri exhaled and put her hand to her chest. "Thank goodness… That means Mako is alright…"

"Yeah, well… But I feel kind of sorry for her."

"Why?" Yuri asked.

"Well, besides the fact that she's grieving for the two of us, her only other friend is Fang-girl, right? So she's probably going to be hanging out with her a lot. She might end up just as bad, and just trash talk all the girls in our class. Maybe she'll even become a delinquent.

Yuri's eyes darkened, and she put both hands on Kuroki's shoulders. "Tomoko… There's still a chance Mako got hit by that car, right?"

Under Yuri's terrifying gaze, Kuroki grew pale. She averted her eyes, but still felt the girl's nails digging into her shoulders. "U-Uh, yeah…" Kuroki answered. "L-Like, maybe she's critically injured and in the hospital, and she could go either way. But some middle schoolers will pull her life support as a prank. They are scum, after all."

Yuri let go of Kuroki and exhaled. "Good."

"In what world is that good?!" Kuroki wondered.

"Huh?" For the first time since awakening, Yuri noticed she was garbed in chainmail and had a longsword on her belt. Underneath the chainmail, she had on a tunic and some leggings. She looked back at Kuroki. Kuroki started sweating, thinking Yuri would accuse her of changing her clothes while she was asleep, but Yuri didn't say anything. She didn't even seem to acknowledge the strange garb.

"S-So… Should we go fight monsters or something?" Kuroki asked.

"Why?"

"Why?! What do you mean, why?! We're clearly in some kind of video game-like world!" Kuroki thought. But she held back and tried to explain, "Uhm, well, I'm clearly a mage and you look like a knight, so I figured it was that kind of thing- you know, like in anime."

"Hmm…"

Yuri clearly wasn't convinced, so it was time to try something else: "Holy crap, a level 99 dragon!"

In a panic, Yuri looked over her shoulder.

Kuroki snickered. "Heh. Made you look."

Yuri struck Kuroki with a shoulder-crushing blow.

"Ow, ow, ow! Hey, my HP!"

"Let's go already," Yuri said, already standing and brushing some wheat off her leggings.

"Wait, let me drink a potion or something- I could die out here!"

"You're fine. I see a village ahead." Yuri started heading for the village Kuroki had noticed before.

"Hey, wait up!" Kuroki ran after Yuri. When she caught up, they could see the villagers were still up and about even though it was night. Reflexively, Kuroki declared, "Alright, let's load up on quests!"

"Huh?"

"Oh… W-Well, try asking them if they need any work done that only heroes can do, like if monsters have been destroying their fields. That kind of stuff."

"Alright."

At Kuroki's urging, Yuri strolled up to an elderly woman who was watering her garden. After an uncertain glance back at Kuroki, and receiving some encouraging gesticulating in return, Yuri said, "Um… My friend says we're heroes, and we can help if monsters are in your… garden."

"Eh?" The old woman was baffled. "What are you talking about?"

Keeping her head down to hide her blush, Yuri spun around and hit Kuroki on the shoulder.

Kuroki rubbed her shoulder. "N-No, it's alright. She just didn't need any help. But the other villagers are bound to have quests. I'm gonna try a few more!"

But no one in the whole village knew what Kuroki was talking about, and her strange queries only got her weird looks. Also, no one else was dressed in the kind of flashy clothes Kuroki and Yuri had, just regular ones. The big mage hat especially stood out.

"What the hell? Can't even make me a normie in this world?" Kuroki muttered once she noticed the differences in apparel, and how much she stood out. She looked up from examining her robes. "We need to find a mayor or something. The bigwigs always have quests."

Yuri had had enough. "Kuroki-san… Stop asking about quests and hunting and leveling up… You're embarrassing us both."

"What the hell! It wasn't just me!" Kuroki said, outraged. "You've asked a few people too! I know you want to go on a monster-hunting quest too!"

"I don't care about that. I asked because you told me to," Yuri said. "And I thought you knew what you were talking about."

"Excuse me!" All of a sudden, a boy garbed in noble attire-he looked like some kind of page or messenger- showed up and interjected himself into Yuri and Kuroki's conversation.

"Oh," Yuri and Kuroki both said.

"Ahem!" The page cleared his throat, then asked, "Are you two the heroes I've been hearing about?"

"No," Yuri answered at once.

"Oh… I see…" Dejected, the page walked away.

"Whuh?… B-But…" Kuroki gaped. She turned to Yuri. "That was our chance! What are you doing?!"

"Oh. Sorry." Yuri looked sheepish. "Wait. I'll just-"

"Wait!" Kuroki sprinted after the page. As she did, Yuri drew her sword from its scabbard and threw it at the page. Kuroki caught up to the page just as blade flew by, nearly severing the page's nose and embedding itself into the wall of a building. "Eep!" Kuroki fell onto her rear and turned pale from nearly getting eviscerated. The page fell over soon after, and he probably wet himself.

"Wait," Yuri called out in a deadpan to the page.

"You nearly killed me, gloomy girl!" Kuroki hissed.

When Yuri caught up to them, Kuroki stared sweating. She hoped Yuri hadn't heard her. Yuri went by and looked at the page. "We are the heroes," she said.

The page, cowering on the ground, nodded furiously, as though afraid what Yuri would do to him if he didn't acquiesce immediately. "Uh-huh, yeah. Okay."

Once he'd had a change of trousers, the page led the way down the road. They traveled until morning to reach the royal capital. There, they were granted an audience with the king himself. The king finally explained the great errand the two heroes from another world had been summoned for: a rising tide of monsters was fast approaching, and only the chosen heroes could hope to stop calamity. It was pretty standard stuff, and no surprise to Kuroki. Throughout the speech, she kept elbowing Yuri to give her a smug, told-you-so look, but Yuri ignored her.

To help them out with their great undertaking, the king gave each of them a sum of coins to buy supplies, equipment, and boarding, as well as a host of vassals to fight by their side. Yet, for some reason, Yuri got a lot more money than Kuroki. And though Yuri got eight hot guys, Kuroki didn't get a single vassal.

Kuroki was pretty bitter over it. As they left the king's court, she glared enviously at Yuri and her entourage.

"What?" Yuri asked when she noticed Kuroki's glare.

"It's really not fair, Yuri-chan… Is it 'cause I'm a mage? Or 'cause I'm gloomy? But doesn't that mean I have to spend more on spell books and stuff? So why?!"

Though Kuroki wasn't doing a good job explaining, the situation hadn't gone unnoticed by Yuri. "Why don't you just take mine? I don't know what to do with it, and you're probably better at picking equipment anyway." She proffered the whole bag of gold coins she'd gotten.

"Really?" Kuroki cheered up once she had the bag of gold in her hands. "Heh heh heh!" Next she eyed the entourage marching behind Yuri, wondering if she'd offer to split them too.

Yuri, following Kuroki's gaze, donned a troubled look. "I don't feel comfortable with this. Can we just ditch them? I'd rather it just be the two of us."

"Oh… Okay…" Kuroki couldn't hide her disappointment.

After buying supplies and resting up at an inn, the next morning they headed out into the wilderness to fight monsters and level up. Things were fine at first, so long as they fought low level slimes and such. But when they started heading into dungeons and fighting tough monsters…

"Tomoko…" Yuri, her left cheek swollen and a nasty gash across her left arm, glared daggers at Kuroki, who was completely unharmed.

"Uhh… Yeah?" Kuroki was already sweating.

"Why am I the only one fighting?" Yuri asked.

"Uh, well, I'm a mage, so…"

"Next time, you fight too," Yuri said, grabbing Kuroki's arm.

"L-Look, I'm healing you, so it's fine, right?" Kuroki said as she cast a spell.

Warm light bathed Yuri's wounds, soothing the pain. But she was still angry. "It doesn't matter if you heal it afterwards; getting hurt isn't fun." She tightened her grip on Kuroki's arm and hauled her deeper into the dungeon, off to the next battle.

"Whooaaa! Hold on!" Kuroki cried out. "B-But I'm a mage! I've been healing you and casting buffs like crazy! That's my role on the team! So it's fine, right? Yuri?" Tears welled up in Kuroki's eyes. "Nothing good is going to come from making a mage fight on the front lines! I have low defense! I could die! Yuri?! Hey, are you listening?!"

Yuri wasn't listening. Kuroki had to cast healing spells on herself after the next battle.

After days of grinding, they got their levels up a good deal. But they got bored of the whole thing, so Kuroki decided they would hole up in comfort at an inn using the king's gold. It was pretty disappointing that there were no video games, manga, or anime, but they entertained themselves however they could. They bought books, hired bards and minstrels to listen to songs, ate good food, and just lazed about.

"Hey, do you think everybody misses us?" Kuroki asked as she snacked on some sheep jerky.

"Mmm…" Yuri looked up from the book she was reading while sitting on her bed. "I'm sure everybody is sad that you died, Kuroki-san. But for me, it's probably just Mako and Yoshida."

"Uh, no… I mean, I'm pretty sure that Nemo thinks of you as a friend too. She had been trying to talk to you, right?"

"Huh?" Yuri's eyes widened, just a little. "You think so? But I'm sure she's more upset over you."

"Heh heh heh… Man, I bet Yuu-chan can't function without me," Kuroki said, not listening anymore. "She's probably bawling her eyes out over little old me…" Imagining a teary-faced Yuu-chan gave her great pleasure.

"Wait, hold the phone!" Kuroki thought. "That Komi-something-san! Isn't she the sort of scum who'd take a shot at Little Bro now that I'm dead, and take advantage of him grieving over me to get close to him?! Damn that glasses freak! Why couldn't she have died and ended up in this world instead of me?!"

"Uhm, what are you thinking about, Kuroki-san?" Yuri didn't like the series of manic expressions Kuroki was making. On second thought, she didn't want to know the answer to her question. She sighed and just said, "It's something weird again, isn't it?"

Weeks went by, and it occurred to both of them that the king hadn't given them a deadline for the incoming swarm of monsters. Yuri said they probably shouldn't idle around too much, since they didn't know what level the monsters would be. Kuroki said not to sweat it: "We're a high enough level. And we've got good equipment since the king gave us so much money. Besides, it's just the first swarm, so the difficulty won't be too high. It might even be tutorial-level or something. I mean, they can't really expect us to just keep trying to level up day-in and day-out for months on end, like some no-life MMORPG players determined to keep playing without breaks until we die of dehydration." Yuri was still uncertain, but Kuroki was the game expert, so she didn't press any further.

The king also neglected to tell them that when the designated time came, they would be transported through teleportation magic. So it was that Kuroki and Yuri found themselves unexpectedly zapped away one day to a nearby fortress, while attired only in their cozy lounging clothes, their armor, equipment, and potions all safely locked away in a chest back at the inn. All the soldiers at the fort were speechless.

As a horde of goblin tribes descended from the mountain path, threatening to overrun the fort at any minute, Yuri glared daggers at Kuroki.

"Eh heh heh… I-It's fine, see? I've still got my spells, and you can borrow some stuff from the armory here, right?"

"It's not fine." Yuri's mien was terrifying. "Those goblins are all higher levels than these soldiers, and we aren't properly equipped. You don't know, Kuroki, because you haven't been getting hurt, but this isn't a game. We're going to die again.

"The hell? What about that one time you almost got me killed?" Kuroki thought. But she was too afraid of Yuri to say that. Plus, she had to admit that Yuri had a point. At their levels and equipment, this battle didn't look like the cakewalk she had thought it would be. She started sweating.

Kuroki and Yuri rushed to prepare as best they could, but pretty soon they were being pushed along by soldiers to the front of the line, outside of the fortress where a brigade was preparing to intercept the goblins.

Kuroki stood, legs shaking. She had a low-level staff in hand, one that was basically just a big branch one of the soldiers found. Yuri stood beside her, hands in her pockets, a stoic look on her face. With a longsword at her side, and garbed in chainmail, she looked much more ready than Kuroki, but still underprepared.

"At least look scared we're gonna die, gloomy girl!" Kuroki thought furiously.

The goblin horde finished the descent from the mountain, and approached the army the fortress had sent out. Each goblin looked ferocious, and was armed to the teeth with steel weapons and plate armor trimmed in furs.

"Urk! This is it! Again!" Kuroki closed her eyes.

Suddenly, the goblins stopped.

"Huh?" Kuroki opened her eyes and gazed out past the fields, where the goblins' line had stopped a stone's throw away. At the head of the goblins' army was a scary looking creature garbed in the same plate mail with fur trimming, armed with a big war axe, and with a scary emoji face- No, wait, it wasn't a creature! It was a girl!

"Kuroki?!"

The emoji girl, Ucchi, broke ranks and hurried across the field.

"Ucchi?" Yuri said, surprised.

"The hell?!" Kuroki exclaimed, shocked to see Emoji. "Why are you leading an army of goblins in this world?!"

"Huh?" Ucchi paused for a full thirty seconds. "Kuroki, what are you doing here?"

"She's ignoring my question?!" Kuroki thought, panicking.

"Why are you here, Kuroki? I thought I pushed you out of the way of that car!" Ucchi blurted out.

"H-Huh? You did?" Now that she thought back to the crash, she did recall getting shoved just before getting hit. So that had been Emoji? Not that it had amounted to anything… Kuroki gave a nervous chuckle. "B-But it looks like we both got hit anyway and ended up here…"

"Tch!" Ucchi bit her thumbnail and gnashed her teeth. "After I rushed all the way across the street to get to you, and sacrificed myself… Still? But that means we ended up dying together… Ew, ew, ew!"

"From across the street?!" Kuroki gaped, shocked. She'd barely had enough time to react to safe Nemoto.

"Raaargh! Whadarya doin', Commander?!" yelled one of the goblins.

"Oh." Yuri looked to Ucchi. "It looks like they're calling for you."

Ucchi looked to the goblins with a fathomless expression. "I resign my post."

"Ehhhh?!" After much grumbling and sulking, the goblin army turned around and headed back up the mountain path.

That's how Kuroki and Yuri defeated an army of goblins and began their journey as heroes in a new world.