Title: A Need for Clarity

Disclaimer: Not mine, Chris Fedak and Sam Sklaver owns it

Summary: Malcolm thinks something is off with Eve and he needs another opinion to get some clarity.

Notes: written for darkmoore in comment_fic for the prompt of Prodigal Son, Malcom Bright, he can feel it in his gut that there is something wrong with Eve.

XXX

He couldn't sleep, nothing unusual there. However, for once it wasn't his father or the girl in the box or any other associated trauma keeping him awake. It was Eve. Maybe Ainsley was right and he was self-sabotaging himself. He'd forgotten how to be happy. He didn't need her, Gil or his mother reminding him of that. Malcolm knew most of the ways in which he was broken. Maybe his growing paranoia that Eve was hiding something from him, that she was lying to him somehow, was just part of his mental issues and his subconscious need to punish himself, to rob himself of every joy.

But something didn't completely track with that. Oh sure, Malcolm knew he as the king of shooting himself in the foot and that maybe he didn't entirely believe he deserved happiness, no matter how much he wanted it, but he also knew something else. He was capable of being happy. Those moments with Gil and Jackie were some of the happiest in his life. He did have some fun in Harvard. And now, he had a real team, not just a group of people he had to work with like his time at the FBI. JT, Dani and Edrisa were people he connected with and felt happy being around. He and Dani had what he considered to be a special friendship. He was always calmer and happier in her orbit and he didn't normally sabotage the hell out of that. No, he could feel it in his gut. It wasn't just him trying to find ways to ruin things with Eve, an act born out of the dark tangles of his mind. There was something wrong with her, even if Ainsley or his mother couldn't see it. But who could he talk to about it?

Gil would listen, of course, but he didn't really know Eve. Even if he was foolish enough to ask his father, Martin Whitly was busy making salacious remarks about Dani and accusing Malcolm of blaming everything on him. Then it occurred to Malcolm he did know who to speak to. The sun was just beginning to pop over the horizon when he headed to the best donut store he knew and picked up something to go. He stopped at a nearby quickie mart to get some plastic bags too just in case. He even swung by his favorite coffee shop and got a cardboard gallon of their finest coffee to go.

Dani looked half asleep as he met her in the elevator. She studied his breakfast offerings, the skin around her eyes crinkling in that cute way of hers. "You look like hell, Bright."

"Thanks. Relationship troubles will keep you up."

Though that comment obviously surprised her, she didn't pry, and he was glad because he instantly regretted telling her he was involved with someone. Dani, at least, understood privacy as far as he could tell. She pointed to the box. "Is that for everyone?"

"Well, for us at any rate. Hope Gil's here already so we can stash it in his office."

She took a deep slow breath in, her eyes closing. "Smells so good."

"Love this coffee."

He led the two-man parade through the bullpen. JT was at his desk with a cup of gas station coffee in his hand. Dani beckoned for him to follow. Sure enough, Gil was already behind his desk. He cocked his head to the side and Malcolm could read the question. I didn't bring you in. Why are you here, kid?

"I brought donuts," Malcolm said without preamble.

JT closed the door behind them. "You get that's a stereotype, right?"

"I do but I like donuts." Malcolm thunked the coffee down. "It's Ethiopian Yirgacheffe, one of my favorites. I know we have sugar and cream in the break room so I didn't cart any along."

"Think you have enough coffee?" JT raised his eyebrows.

"For me, yes. Not sure what you're going to do." Malcolm grinned back and JT snorted. "I thought we could wrap up the donuts because I have some for breakfast and some for later." He set the big box down and opened it with a flourish. "For now, there are strawberry frosted, matcha green tea frosted, a triple chocolate and a tres con leche type not to mention the brown sugar cinnamon crumb. A few Bavarian creams…"

"Is that a maple cruller with bacon on it?" JT didn't wait for an answer. He snatched it out of the box.

"I figured you might go for that one." Malcolm laughed. "And for later there's a black pepper olive oil, and that one with the edible rose petals is made with a wine frosting. And for me and Gil especially later there are ones with Tullamore Dew whiskey or bourbon in the icing. Thought we'd want to bag those to keep them fresh."

"Good thought. I want a whiskey one," Dani said. "You can fight Gil for the bourbons but I wouldn't get between JT and that maple-bacon abomination."

"So, I see." Malcolm fished up a Bavarian cream before Gil managed to get both of them. "And JT I have a question. I could use some help."

JT paused, one end of the crawler in his mouth. His eyes widened as he shook his head.

"You ate the donut, you owe him." Dani laughed as Gil shook his head.

"Okay fine." JT took his donut and returned to his desk.

Malcolm fixed himself a cup of coffee and carted his Bavarian cream over to JT's desk. He sat down. "I need to get your thoughts on something."

"I'm listening. Also, this is like the best donut of my life," JT said, taking another bite.

"Good. I have a relationship question," Malcolm said and JT's panicked look returned.

"Can't you ask Gil?"

Malcolm shook his head. "Too much like asking my dad."

"Don't you know any other men you talk to about this sort of thing?" JT whined.

"Well there is my actual dad."

"Yeah, let's not ask him."

"I suppose I could text Vijay." Malcolm sighed. He didn't want to do that because he was just reforming that relationship.

JT wrinkled his nose. "Probably not your best bet. Fine. Let's hear it."

"You've met Eve and I was hoping to get your take on something. We've been going out a couple weeks now."

"Wait, she came back?" JT almost dropped his donut.

Malcolm narrowed his eyes. "Yes. Anyhow, something feels….off somehow. I wanted your opinion of her. You spent time with her. I just think…I don't know." He shrugged. "My sister thinks I'm trying to screw myself up because I have a history of that but something seems wrong. Did you think there was anything odd about Eve?"

"Yes," JT said without hesitation.

"Really?"

"She wants to date you. That right there is a red flag," JT replied, keeping his face absolutely neutral.

Malcolm hit him with the stink eye he usually reserved for his father. "I'm being serious."

"So am I. Look, you have to know you're deeply weird, right? I'm not saying that to be mean. You're a good guy but you are every bit as weird as Edrisa and that's saying something." JT polished off the cruller.

"I would have said we're unique but fine, weird it is. But that's not what I'm talking about. I look at her and sometimes I feel like she has these deep secrets, that she's not with me because she cares but because she wants something of me."

"Your money? You did mention she's not from your world but she knows how to navigate it."

Malcolm swigged back some of his coffee but left his donut untouched. He remembered saying that at the bar. "I don't think that's it. I've been through that before. This is different."

"Maybe she doesn't entirely trust you. I mean, you did shred her in front of me and Tally," JT reminded him. "That was brutal dude. You were somewhere else, deep in your own head. I couldn't even shut you up and I tried. Maybe she wants to get closer but she doesn't know if she can because of that."

He took a deep breath in, glancing away. He hadn't considered that. "I guess that's possible."

"But you don't think that's it. Let me ask you this, has she told you yet who the other half of that tattoo belonged to? You were dead on with her losing someone. I could see it in her eyes," JT said and Malcolm shuddered.

"No…and I think you're on to something. I know she might just be private. I get that. I try not to pry because you're right, if I start I can't stop. I'm trying to be better about that. I haven't asked Dani about her father after she told me about losing him because I could see she doesn't want to talk about it. I haven't pressed Eve about her tattoo for that same reason. I guess I'm learning."

"I don't know if I can tell you anything you haven't thought of. I didn't get much of a feel for her. Tally liked her. I don't know if she's keeping secrets. She very well might be, but I know this, if your gut is telling you something, you should listen to it. We have those feelings for a reason." JT picked up his coffee cup and finished it. "I'm going to go get the good stuff. Wish I could help you, Bright. Maybe you should just ask her. Tell her that you can't build anything on top of secrets."

"Thanks, JT. I mean that. I'll give that a try." He knocked back the rest of the coffee. "I need a refill too."

"Yeah just what you need, something to wire you tighter. Eat your donut."

Malcolm brandished it. "I will. "

He wasn't sure he felt better exactly but he knew JT was right. There was no going forward with secrets. He had to figure out what Eve was hiding. He knew that when he peeked behind the curtain, he wasn't going to like what he saw. But that wasn't going to happen at the moment so he was going to drink his coffee, eat his fine donuts and pray for a case to distract him until he could tackle things with Eve. His gut told him achieving clarity where Eve was concerned wasn't going to have a happy ending but at least he'd have his answers. Maybe that would be enough.