Based on a prompt by Charlotte on the Bellamione Discord.

Selfie

A Bellamione story.

How hard could it be?

That was Bellatrix's initial thought when she started fiddling with her daughter's infernal muggle puzzle-box. The first surprise was to actually find Cassie's puzzle-box left on the kitchen table: the way she was always mucking about with that thing, Bellatrix had started to think she was married to the thing and her hand would start to shape itself to that flat little box.

Worst thing yet is that Cassie had talked Hermione into getting one as well, albeit one that was much cheaper and smaller. Still, that had given her an idea. Hermione always told her to 'get with the times' and 'enjoy the things the muggle world had to offer'.

Right. It was bad enough that Cassie had one foot in the muggle world, but that didn't mean Bellatrix should follow suit. Although she had to admit she did rather like central heating in their home. But that was the only thing she would admit to and even then begrudgingly.

Of course, when Hermione had called her 'technologically illiterate', Bellatrix could see that as nothing else than a declaration of war.

Bellatrix was convinced she, as the talented witch she was, could even master a muggle device if she wanted to. And she would do that by snapping a picture and sending it over to Hermione by way of muggle puzzle-box.

How hard could it really be? The muggle puzzle-box was a creation of inferior muggles and she had seen her daughter do it so many times before. If a twelve year old could figure it out, it should be easy for someone of the skills and talents of Bellatrix Black.

She held the puzzle-box in front of her and carefully tapped the flat surface. A colorful image appeared on the surface of a drawn girl which was disturbingly thin, had no nose, eyes way too large for her face and blue hair. Bellatrix scrunched up her nose at the image in sheer distaste: her daughter had some rather strange interests.

Apparently, the puzzle-box needed to be unlocked with some sort of swipe.

"Not much of a security measure," Bellatrix muttered, pressed the tip of her long nail into the surface and shoved it to the right. Nothing happened. Bellatrix tried again, leaving some scratches on the surface. Strange. She had seen Cassie do this multiple times a day.

She swiped with her nail wilder and wilder in frustration, leaving more and more scratches. Until she got the bright idea to use the flat of her finger instead.

"Ahah!" Bellatrix exclaimed as the disturbingly drawn girl disappeared and made way for... a different disturbingly drawn girl with breasts way too large for her body which were barely covered up with gravity defying strips of fabric. Around the girl were a few smaller rectangular drawings. "Now what?"

As she was trying to figure out what to do next, she was startled by the sound of a 'bloop' while a message popped up on top of the surface. No doubt from one of Cassie's insipid little friends. While trying to concentrate, the 'bloop' came back several times and it started to annoy her to no end. Still, if it could receive messages, Bellatrix surmised it could also send them. Perhaps she could tell this insipid little friend to leave her alone.

She tapped the message and a whole new screen appeared. However, her joy quickly faded when she saw the letters appear at the bottom of the surface. They were all out of order! How on Earth was she supposed to write a message that way?!

Bellatrix found her rage mounting deep within her. Right, lets keep this short and to the point then. Bellatrix discovered that she could make letters appear by pressing them with her finger, making slow but steady progress. "F... U... C... K... I... F... F..." she typed out.

Fuck iff.

She knew it wasn't correct, because she had missed the 'o' and pressed the 'i' instead. But really, that was the puzzle-box's own fault for placing the letters out of order. She pressed the conveniently labeled 'send' button. Satisfied, she was about to find her way back to the big-breasted drawn girl when something popped up.

"CASS OMG WTF!"

Bellatrix looked at the message. Read it once. Twice.

"What the bloody hell does that even mean?!" Bellatrix yelled at the puzzle-box. There was, of course, no answer.

Obviously, she'd need to be more direct and drastic in her attempts to get Cass' annoying friends to leave her alone. Again, she started type again. "B... E... S... I... L... E... N... T... Y... O... U... S... T... U...P... I... D... T... W... A... T... S... Y... O... U... A... R... E... A... L... L... I... D... I... O... T... S..."

There. No mistakes this time and she only missed one spacing. Bellatrix was quite pleased with herself. Surely this would be a clear enough message.

After pressing the conveniently labeled 'send all'-button, Bellatrix was reasonably sure that she would be left alone from now on. Which left her to figure out the camera part of the puzzle-box in peace. Once back to the screen with the big-breasted drawn girl, she had a eureka-moment when she found a small icon shaped roughly like a camera. She pressed it with the flat of her finger and a real-time depiction of the kitchen appeared on the surface.

"Aaah," Bellatrix smiled in victory while she waved the camera around and saw the image change. She aimed the puzzle-box at the table and, after pressing a button underneath, had snapped a picture of the kitchen table.

"Easy!" spoke the self-assured Bellatrix aloud to the empty room. Now to take a picture of herself. This was significantly harder, however, considering she had to turn around the puzzle-box to aim its lens at herself while trying to figure out how to actually operate it at the same time. She held the puzzle-box away from her, arm stretched out fully while trying to maneuver her finger to the other side of the puzzle-box to feel around for the button to actually snap the picture.

She cursed as she was blinded by a flash, but decided to snap another one to make sure while still feeling around. No flash came and Bellatrix was getting frustrated again. "ARGH!" she yelled out in anger once a sudden flash blinded her again. There, two was enough. Next step was to send the picture to Hermione.

Bellatrix flipped the puzzle-box again and by now she had discovered the use of the ever convenient 'send' button. She pressed it and a list of names appeared. Bellatrix tapped through it, but couldn't find the name 'Hermione'.

"Fallen at the last hurdle," Bellatrix seethed, until she saw the word 'mum' appear. Hm, the puzzle-box had correctly identified Hermione as Cassie's mum. That was a bit frightening to think of. Still, she pressed it, the puzzle-box showed the word 'sending' and the photograph was off.

Ecstatic about her victory over this vile muggle device, Bellatrix tossed it back to the table and went to do what she had came to the kitchen to do: make herself a cup of tea to enjoy while she worked.

After her rehabilitation, she had been asked by the Ministry to join their team of unspeakables. Bellatrix had become somewhat of an expert on the Dark Arts for obvious reasons, and was currently helping with the development of new countermeasures. Hermione had likened it to ex-burglars going to work for security companies and using their previously gained knowledge for good rather than personal gain. She supposed this was an apt comparison. Also, it allowed her to work mostly from home.

With a fresh cup of mint tea in hand, Bellatrix returned to their home's sizable library-office and continued her work.

While dipping into a rather nasty family of curses, she could hear the puzzle-box's angry buzzing from the kitchen for hours afterwards. No doubt it was angry about having been defeated by a powerful and clever witch such as herself and she paid it no further mind. It was simply beneath her notice, like so many of the other things she had bested.

Bellatrix was still at work when when front door to their townhouse opened and there were sounds of footfalls on the stairs. It was a stride which Bellatrix recognized, so she already sat back with a smug look on her face. Hermione stepped into her office, smile on her face, trenchcoat folded up in her arms and lovely brown hair cascading over her shoulders and back.

"Good afternoon, pet," Bellatrix greeted and was soon on the receiving end of a loving kiss. "How was your day?"

Hermione chuckled and produced the smaller puzzle-box of her own. She tapped a few buttons and flipped it around. On the surface was a grainy, out-of-focus, crooked selfie of Bellatrix in a state of abject snarling rage.

"Better when I saw this!" Hermione giggled. "I couldn't stop laughing for ten minutes. Ron and Arthur couldn't either when I showed them."

Bellatrix smiled and raised her chin imperiously. "And to think you said I would never be able to work one of those puzzle-boxes. What do you think of your 'technologically illiterate' wife now, hm?"

"You've proven me wrong, Belle, and I stand corrected," Hermione smiled. "I don't feel like cooking. How about we order a pizza tonight? Cass will be home soon too."

Again, the front door opened.

"Ah, speak of the devil," Bellatrix chuckled. Their daughter ran up the stairs and appeared in the library. A plucky twelve-year old girl, curly brown hair and wearing jeans which were inexplicably torn in places but still somehow cost more than a pair of jeans without tears sauntered towards the desk.

"Hi, mums," Cassie greeted, kissing both her mothers on the cheek.

"Hey there, sweetie," said Hermione. "We're thinking pizza for dinner tonight."

"Sounds great!"

"How was your shopping trip with nan?" asked Bellatrix, sarcastic edge froming. "Buy any more damaged trousers for full price?"

Cassie groaned and rolled her eyes. "It's fashion, mum!"

"Right..." Bellatrix muttered. "Never mind that you're spending my money on ratty torn clothing..."

"Anyway, it was fun, but I forgot my phone," Cassie muttered. "I thought I had it in my jacket, but I didn't. I missed a whole day of chinwag with my friends!"

"Oh, you mean your puzzle-box?" Bellatrix replied. "It's on the kitchen table."

Cassie's eyes lit up. "Ta!"

Bellatrix slammed the book shut and placed it in the drawer to lock it away. When she looked up, she saw Hermione smirking at her.

"What?" Bellatrix raised an eyebrow.

"One... Two... Three..." Hermione counted slowly, that smirk still tugging at the corners of her mouth.

On the count of three, a massive wail sounded through the house. The source was Cassie in the kitchen. "MMMMUUUUUUUUUUUUUMMMMMMMM! WHAT DID YOU DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO?!"