Disclaimer: I don't own Cowboy Bebop or "Chloroform Perfume" by From Autumn to Ashes.

A/N: Ok, this is my first Bebop fic and I'm still not sure what I'm going to do with it. I don't even know if it's going to have any more chapters. I guess that's up to you - if you want more let me know.

Anyway, if there are more chapters, they won't be quite so introspective and angsty as this. I know a lot of people use the song thing in their fics, and so am I. I figured, if every Bebop episode was named after a song, why not go for it?

And, for setting's sake, this is set about 3 months after session 26.

Session 1:

Chloroform Perfume

This is the end result of so many meetings

Late night dinners with no one eating

We sit in corners and sip burnt coffee

Count the tiles upon the ceiling

Skip this pretense and cut straight to dying

Just don't beg me to keep your eyes from crying...

I don't know what the hell we're doing in Ganymede. I thought Jet hated this place. Well, he certainly seems to be over that. It's been his favorite spot to park the Bebop since... Well, since then...

I still have a hard time admitting what happened actually happened. So does Jet. Ed doesn't seem too phased by it. I don't think she's old enough to really comprehend what happened.

I'm not even sure how old she is. Yeah, she came back. A few days after I did. We stopped at Earth to refuel and she just kinda showed up. I don't always understand what she says, but I figured the life of an assistant to a map-maker was too boring for her. The life of a bounty hunter barely holds her attention. Ed, the ADD poster child.

Anyway, back to that. I don't think either one of us, Jet or I, are ready to admit what happened actually happened. Neither of us sleep much anymore. I don't know why he doesn't, but I'm too afraid that he'll show up one night and no one will be awake to let him in the hangar. Knowing that bastard, he'd just turn around without a word and go on like nothing happened. Like we were nothing.

We don't eat much either. No money means no food. We're sort of taking a break from the bounties. I guess no one's really up for it. Plus we don't need as much money as we used to. We haven't left Ganymede in a long time - no flying meant no fuel costs. So what little money we do get our hands on goes to feeding Ed and Ein.

Or at least that's what Jet says. He always has this need to rationalize everything. In truth, even if we were sitting in chairs made of Woolongs, I doubt we'd eat. With no one to complain about how bad Jet's food is, he seems to have lost his will to cook.

So we survive on coffee. Coffee and Ed. As much as that kid can get on your nerves, looking at her just kinda gives you this... will to live. Maybe not will. More of a need. I don't think she'd last two seconds without us. So we're here so she can be here. She likes this place.

Me? I'm not sure if I like it or not. I mean, even though I'd never admit it out loud, I like the company. Not just the company, but who the company is. Watching Jet prune is bonzai trees has become a regular part of my day. And who could live without Ed? But this place is full of memories.

A lot of people move when they get divorced, or their partner dies, but we can't. I'm not saying that Spike was my husband or anything like that. All I'm saying is he had become part of my family. Jet - the father figure. Ed and Ein - the pets (because I hope I'd never have a little sister that insane). And Spike - the older brother that you bicker with to keep you refular. No matter how dysfunctional a family is, if a member leaves, it's a sad thing.

It's not like we can pack up and move. When you're too broke to pay for gas, buying a new ship is out of the question. I suppose if we really put our minds to it, Jet and I could rake in enough to retire the Bebop, but our minds are far away from that.

Luckily the dreaded "S' word hasn't crossed either of our minds. We're not that far gone yet. Or maybe we're past it already - who can tell? I don't think either of us are in the shape of talking the other out of it. There are no shoulders to cry on here - we're both having enough trouble keeping our own heads on.

What I want to know is why the hell this is happening? Sometimes I just get so angry. Who the hell does he think he is? It's not right to just waltz into two people's lives, change them, and then just walk right out. It isn't fair!

But I've got no right to complain. Jet should be taking this worse than I am. After all, he knew Spike a lot longer than I did. Jet loved him. He'd never admit to it, but he did. Not any natural kind of love. I guess you could say like a father loves his son, but deeper than that. It was like a father, who also happened to be his sons partner in crime, and his son's drinking buddy, and his son's confidant, and his son's teacher. Yeah, if a father like that ever existed, it would've been Jet.

But I can't help but feel just as hurt and just as lonely. It's not like I was in love with the selfish prick. We were never an item. We weren't even that great of friends. It's just... It's just that Spike can put this goddamned spell on you. You don't know he's doing. He doesn't know he's doing it, but it's happening.

The next thing you know, you're attached to the guy and he's walking out of your life. I can almost imagine how Julia felt all those years ago when whatever happened between her and Spike happened.

This is a lot to be thinking about. I can't really talk about it with Jet. He's still in denial - he keeps coming up with excused for why he feels like shit. I know why I feel like shit and I know why he does, too - but it's not my place to tell him. Maybe I'll take a little trip. One last bounty to put fuel in the Red Tail and then I'll be gone. Jet'll be fine - he's still got Ed and Ein.

It's 3 am and I'm still far from sleep

But this is a habit that I can't break

And my only company is a skipping stone

I don't know what happened. Maybe it's because I made my peace with Alisa. Whatever it is, I've come to like Ganymede nowadays. It's a nice, peaceful place. Not too many bounties to hunt. Not too many syndicates to deal with. I like it.

We've been out here, just outside the docks nearby Alisa's old bar, for a few months. We came in to turn in our second bounty since... Well, since then...

Anyway, we turned him in and just never left. Ed and Ein came back. I have no idea why - Ed seemed so excited about being with her father. Either way, they're back, eating up all the food. Faye's been nice lately. Not so angry all the time. No, maybe she just lost her energy to be angry.

I'll admit it, I've been feeling a little low lately, too. I mean, a lot's happened recently. A lot I still haven't gotten over. Plus there's nothing to eat. And, as nice and warm as it is here on Ganymede, it's too hot to sleep.

So here I am. 3 in the god damned morning and I still can't sleep. Damned heat. There's one good thing about living on the water - skipping stones. I was always amused by it, I don't know why though. I learned it as a kid, I perfected it as a cop. With a job like that, there's a lot of things that weigh on your mind. It's best to think them out while watching a stone magically skip across the water.

Skipping stones and smoking cigarettes - besides not sleeping, they're my two favorite pastimes. I don't know why I'm smoking so much recently. I always did, but never this much. I'm not even sure if I'm smoking for the sake of the nicotine. No, I doubt that. It's something to do with the matches. Lighting my death-stick and then watching it flicker in the sea breeze. Something strangely mesmerizing about it. I caught Spike doing it once or twice. Told me it was an old habit of his. I pick up the worst habits from people.

But I'm running out of stones and matches. And I'm running out of money. I'm kinda low on patience, too. Maybe I'll start hunting again. Pick up a few bounties to get us all back on our feet and the Bebop back in the air. I'm sure Faye'll like that - she must be going stir crazy. Ed'll love it - she's been looking up info on bounties just for the fun of it recently. Ein'll love it - he'll get to eat.

Yeah, it's about time we strike out again. We're three people with way too much energy to be sitting around here like this. It's time to go.

And the street like flickers like this match in my hand -

Begging to strike.