Hello. Welcome to the first part of a huge triple upload for this most unique of days that comes only once every four years.
Folks, I'll start out by saying that no one story of mine that I've worked on in the past few months have I gone back and forth on whether or not I actually wanted to post this than what you see here. First I was all in favor, then I wasn't and sent it to the Recycle Bin, then some time later I resurrected it only to send it back, then I thought about making a significantly truncated edition as a flashback for the final chapter of "Flashing Back" and then finally I went "ah, let's go for the it" and here we are.
Anyway, no prizes for guessing what episode this is based on and I'll leave it at that. There will, however, be some additional commentary of mine at the end, so there's that to look forward after this.
Well, with that, read on and let's see where this goes from here.
The Loud House is the exclusive property of Nickelodeon and Viacom. The usage of the setting, characters and such is based on nothing more than a pure affinity for everything and is not being used for monetary purposes.
Mornings in the Loud house can often be kind of raucous, but typically in a good, jovial sense. That wasn't the case this time around.
At the moment, Lincoln was holed up inside his parents' bedroom, sheltering himself from the all-out fracas that engulfed his sisters. They all had gotten involved in a huge fight, both in the verbal and physical varieties, as a result of Lincoln let his big mouth accidentally letting loose some embarrassing details regarding some of his sisters that ultimately lead to a mass scuffle.
The whole ordeal really originated a couple of days earlier after Lori and Leni got into a fight of their own after they both ended up getting the exact same dress and both demanded the other return theirs. Lincoln wanted to intervene and help out, but was repeatedly warned against doing so by the other sisters as a result of the "sister fight protocol", which effectively stipulated that he should not get involved and that they'll resolve their differences themselves. Being told this was such an alien concept to Lincoln. He always had such a natural inclination in wanting to help others with their problems, so to then be told he cannot do so and that somehow leaving well enough alone will act as some sort of magic bullet that can resolve issues just like that seemed so unrealistic to him. So despite his sisters' warnings, Lincoln tried his hand in resolving Lori and Leni's problems, but instead he inadvertently lit a proverbial powder keg during the rest of the day that caused all of his sisters to start fighting with each other as well in the time that came soon after. The situation had become so stressful for Lincoln that he ended up staying over at Clyde's house for the night.
The following morning, Lincoln returned home and was willing to enter the breach again in order to smooth things out, but much to his surprise, the second he stepped foot inside, he witnessed his sisters all in the living room peacefully coexisting. They all reiterated that by leaving everyone alone the night before, he followed the sister fight protocol properly and everything returned to normal soon thereafter. Perhaps reluctantly, Lincoln accepted this standard and at the very least was relieved the fighting had stopped, at least until he opened his mouth and the aforementioned morning quarrel subsequently kicked off.
Still within the confines of his parents' bedroom, Lincoln tried listening on what may be going on beyond the other side of the door. Things sounded like they had winded down considerably, so he felt like taking the risk of checking things out. Against the wishes of his parents, who also were hiding with him and unwilling to breach the sister fight protocol themselves, Lincoln cracked open the door and prepared to brave the elements.
Upon stepping on out, while noting there were no fisticuffs, he could still sense high tension in the air. He got to the center of the living room to see all his sisters facing away from whomever they just had gotten done bickering with.
"Hey, uh, guys. How are things?" Lincoln asked.
He got no verbal response right away, but everyone did narrow their eyes over in his direction.
"So...you all doing okay?" He rephrased the question.
"Ugh, what do you think?" Leni fired back in an uncharacteristically scornful tone.
"Yeah, can you get a clue, Lincoln?" Luan added, also not exactly in a pleasant manner.
Lincoln chuckled nervously, "Okay, I get the sense you're not feeling so hot right now and I'm willing to admit I didn't help matters not too long ago..."
"That's putting it mildly, brah." Luna said, at least more calmly compared to the prior two statements from her sisters, but still fairly cutting in intent.
"And if you want any recommendations of ours, I suggest you repeat what you did last night and skedaddle." Lisa proposed.
In his mind, Lincoln figured that was perhaps what was best. After all, doing just that did somehow bring hostilities to an end previously. So with that, he began to leave his sisters alone.
But midway through, he was having second thoughts. While his mind told him to keep going, his heart disagreed strongly. No matter what he was told before, Lincoln can't help himself. Leaving anyone alone and having issues simmer completely went against his character and he wasn't going to stand for it. So at the risk of getting his sisters more steamed at him, Lincoln turned around and made his stand.
"You know what, no, I'm not leaving!" He said defiantly, "I'm staying right here until I can help resolve things!"
As he thought, no one particularly liked hearing that.
"Lincoln, I thought you just told us that you were going to respect the sister fight protocol." Lana said.
"Well, perhaps I don't actually respect it, because maybe I still think it's such a stupid way of handling things. I don't understand how you think this works." Lincoln stated.
Lucy shook her head, "Sigh. I told you before. It's a sister thing and thus you wouldn't understand it."
Lincoln rolled his eyes, "Oh, sure, 'a sister thing', right. I didn't know 'keep the only boy in the family out of the loop and never explain anything to him' was such a priority for you all..."
"Lincoln, don't be so obnoxious." Lori expressed contemptuously, "And seriously, do not turn this into a 'boys vs. girls' kind of thing, because you're literally so far off base if that's what you are implying."
"Of course it's not like that. Totally not. It's not like the obviously perfect sisters who were just fighting with one another, only to then suddenly and coincidentally always unite together don't want any assistance from their lone brother who apparently is always wrong and does nothing but screw up everything in their lives or anything like that." Lincoln shot back, dripping in sarcasm.
Lynn violently growled and shook her fist toward him, "You better put a lid on it before I decide to put something much worse in instead!"
"Yeah, if you're gonna interfere in our problems, maybe we should get involved in your life much more, too!" Lola shouted in addition.
Lincoln waved his hands dismissively at that prospect, "Oh, no, no, no! No way is that happening! Do I have to remind you that the last time you interfered in my affairs, this happened?"
He balled up one of his fists and swung it right into his face, which for a brief moment did actually cause some concern among his sisters.
"Okay, maybe that wasn't the smartest thing for me to do..." Lincoln admitted as he rubbed the portion of his face he whacked himself in, "But my point still stands. You did not help matters by getting involved."
Lisa scoffed, "As if your involvement in our disputes didn't escalate things and turned our residence effectively into the equivalent an occupied war zone with guided patrols or anything preposterous like that."
"Hey, at least when I tried to help, I had good intentions!" Lincoln said, "What do you do other than try to mess around with my life? Apparently nothing else!"
"Dude, just give it a rest already!" Luna said exasperatedly, "You've already admitted that you made things worse between us yesterday and before that, so why don't you just let it go, bro? It'd be the best thing for all of us."
"Yeah, and how can you question our intentions? What makes yours more purer than ours?" Luan added, "As much as you'll try to deny it, we do want to look out for your best interests, you know."
"Oh sure you do..." Lincoln said, again with more sarcasm, "Let me count the ways. In addition to the whole black eye incident, there's the time you 'helped' out by setting me up with four different dates at the same time without telling me or I bet without consulting each other. Or how about the time you wanted to help me with the grocery shopping, only to swindle me once we got to the store by goofing around and getting us kicked out? Spare me the fact that you got me my box of Zombie Bran afterwards, I still didn't like being tricked in the first place. Or how about-"
"Ugh, Lincoln, enough already!" Lori grumbled, cutting off her brother's rant, "This is literally getting us nowhere, so I suggest you follow along with what Lisa said and leave us alone."
Frustrated with being unable to get through to his sisters, Lincoln groaned angrily and stomped his foot hard.
"Dang it, if that's the way it's gonna be, fine!" He stated loudly, turning to march his way upstairs, "I tried, but apparently you're all too stubborn to admit that cutting me out won't just magically solve everything! But sure, whatever you want, I'll butt out just as you say I should. It's clear you don't need my help or don't want my help..."
As Lincoln got halfway up the stairs, he paused for a moment. This whole experience had been riling him up, but at this point, it was now draining him of emotion. Sighing heavily, he finished his statement in a more defeated sense.
"And it's also apparent none of you appreciate my help either..."
With that out of the way, he completed the trek upstairs and adjourned to his room.
As that happened, the sisters resumed sitting in silence away from their recent respective disputants.
All except for one.
Looking over toward the stairway of which Lincoln just went up, Luan was starting to feel a bit sorry for him. When he said he'll butt out of their affairs just now, she couldn't help but think that was directed at her in particular, since she basically said the same thing once he came back home earlier and was shocked to see no fighting going on. At the end of the day, no matter if the sister fight protocol allegedly solved things, seeing her only brother feel like he was unneeded in dispute settlement did make her feel somewhat bad and was willing to make things a little more right with him.
"Uh, I'll be right back, you guys." Luan said as she started walking away, "I...just need to go up to my room to…you know, check up on my schedule of upcoming birthday party gigs of mine. Yeah, that's it..."
Just as she stepped foot on the first stair, it seemed quite apparent from her sisters what her actual purpose was going to be.
"Or in other words, you're going to try talking to Lincoln about everything regarding the sister fight protocol and such?" Lori questioned.
Luan turned to face everyone and chuckled nervously, "Wow, I must be turning invisible on you guys, because you clearly must have saw through my ruse there. Was I really that transparent? Get it? But seriously, yeah, that's what I'm really about to do. I know it might be kind of hypocritical since we're all like 'don't involved in our business' and we just told him to leave us alone, but honestly, I can't help myself in feeling sorry for Lincoln and I don't see anything wrong in trying to smooth things over with him."
Seemingly getting the unspoken approval for such detente on her part, Luan proceeded up the stairs until reaching the top. Upon doing so, however, she let out a distressful sigh. Though she did want to talk things over with Lincoln, she wasn't exactly confident about it. She was worried about what would be said and if things could end up becoming more badly wrought with him.
Luan took a moment in trying to gain the will to press onward, then she turned to the right and arrived at the door to Lincoln's bedroom. She raised her hand up to knock on it, but then lowered it down as she was getting a case of cold feet, so much so that she backed away a couple of steps.
"Oh, I'd really like to help him out, but I don't know if I can do this by myself..." Luan expressed sadly.
She considered turning back and perhaps trying again later on, but she then felt a hand being placed on her shoulder and given a light squeeze.
"Maybe because you won't have to do it yourself, Luan."
She looked right over her shoulder to see Luna standing before her with a warm smile beckoning forth.
"Luna?" Luan said with a curious turn of her head.
"I wasn't so keen at first on doing something like this, but I must admit, that last line said from our little bro did hit me here." Luna explained, thumping her chest with her hand, "So ultimately at the last moment I figured that I'd follow your lead in wanting to make things cool with Linc, too, and also give him a chance in explaining his side of everything."
Having someone else now by her side, Luan felt herself acquire an extra boost of confidence and was now truly ready in engaging with Lincoln. She raised her hand again and this time knocked on the door.
"Hey, Lincoln, can we come in for a moment?" Luan inquired.
There was several seconds of silence, but then a response did come from Lincoln eventually.
"Who is this 'we' that is being spoken of?" He asked back.
"Just me and Luna." Luan answered, "So...can we come in?"
Once again, no response immediately came forward from the other side. This time, though, the silence between responses was much more drawn out. Regardless, Luan wanted to take action now, so she simply opened the door and let herself and Luna inside Lincoln's room.
As they stepped in, they saw their brother laying on his bed looking up at the ceiling with a look that displayed either total indifference or perchance a more saturnine mood than he may be letting on.
"You know, I was going to say 'come in' if you'd waited a couple seconds more..." Lincoln dryly remarked.
"Um...sorry?" Luan said nervously, then changed her attitude to be more confident, "But anyway, we're here right now and want to talk to you about everything that's gone on these past couple of days."
"Oh, we wouldn't want to do that now, would we?" Lincoln stated sarcastically, "Would that not count as interfering in my life? After all, didn't we all just agree that's not such a good idea, like me butting in with your problems? We do nothing but make each other's lives worse by getting involved, don't we?"
"Dude, please don't be like this." Luna said with a shake of her head, "Look, like Luan said, we just want to talk, okay? Give us that chance."
With a release of a sigh, Lincoln acquiesced by sitting up while both his sisters joined in closer to him by taking their own seats on his bed between him.
"I'm not so sure what else there is to talk about, you guys." Lincoln said with very little emotion behind it, "I mean, it's very clear you two and everyone else didn't want, need or appreciate my efforts to help out, so what's the point?"
He sighed again, a bit more sadly than before. To give him a semblance of comfort, Luan reached out and placed a hand on his shoulder.
"Listen, Lincoln, it's not that no one wants or doesn't appreciate your help. I think I can say most everyone would agree with that should we ask what they believed. But the thing is, sometimes you can't get involved all the time and perhaps you need to let matters handle themselves." She said to him.
Lincoln turned to face Luan, "I...I guess so. But I just don't understand how that works. I don't typically like seeing any of us fighting over most anything and I love helping resolve issues, so to then be told I can't get involved...it makes me feel kind of powerless, if not useless altogether."
He moaned wistfully as he finished speaking. Following up with her initial act of consoling him, Luan brought her little brother over in a hug to reassure him some more.
"I know that sounds hard to hear for you and believe me, I don't entirely get it myself either." She said softly, "But at the end of the day, sometimes you might just have to leave things be. Maybe they won't end up better all the time, and you could then try your hand in helping out. But other times, perhaps not interfering at every turn can itself work out, too. Admittedly, that's a lesson we should all learn for us meddling in your affairs, too."
After holding on to him for a little bit more, Luan let go of Lincoln and she saw that his demeanor starting to perk up ever so slightly.
"Yeah, I'm maybe starting to get it better, even though I may never fully accept it entirely." Lincoln said, "And I will admit again that my interference in affairs these past couple of days probably did in fact make things worse. Case in point, you two. I made you start fighting after I encouraged Luna to swap rooms with Leni for the night, which caused both of you to take a side in the fight between her and Lori."
He paused for a second, then turned his gaze over to Luna.
"At that time, you were furious at me for doing that, Luna, and in hindsight, knowing what came soon thereafter, I don't blame you." He added.
A frown formed on Luna's face, "Well, I don't think you need to put such a negative vibe on yourself over it, bro. You didn't know at the time how things would go down after that. And besides, I wasn't really as mad at you as you're making it out to be."
"Oh, but you were, Luna." Lincoln said in disagreement, "I believe your exact words when I requested you and Leni switch rooms for that night were something to the effect of 'you're playing with fire, brah'. Not to mention the following morning, you and Luan came pretty darn close to giving me a beating as I tried to help out. So, yeah, I'd say you were quite huffy at me."
Luna chuckled slightly, mainly as a result of Lincoln's fairly spot-on impression of her when reminding her of that quote, but then was willing to concede that point to her little brother.
"Okay, maybe I was quite a degree displeased when you did that in the moment." She admitted, "But the more I think about, even I'll be willing to give it to you that your heart was in the right place. You thought by having Lori and Leni away from each other that night, they'd cool off and then things would be on the level between them the next morning. That's what you were thinking, right?"
Lincoln nodded, "Kind of. Still, that obviously didn't turn out liked I planned, as not only did things still not go well for them, but again, you and Luan began fighting and soon it spilled over to all our sisters. Some fence mender I turned out to be..."
He scrunched himself up like a ball and lowered his face down to his knees, then he emitted another sad sigh.
"Why should I even bother? Maybe it is for the best that I be cut out of any future fights or arguments for good, no matter what they are about or how much I'd like to help out..."
Hating to see their brother becoming so morose about this whole state of affairs, both Luna and Luan had the same idea in which they moved closer to Lincoln and each put an arm around him.
"Hold on a sec, bro, no one's suggesting you should be cut off altogether, least I never heard so. Sure, constantly interfering in our disputes isn't always going to be helpful. But being cut out full stop? Nah, no one's insisting on that, again as far as I know. But even if it were suggested, it'd be a very unhealthy way of doing things. I think we're really beginning to recognize that now, both for you getting involved in our personal jams or us meddling in yours." Luna said.
Luan nodded in agreement, "Yeah, and nor should you be selling yourself short on your abilities on being helpful in putting a stop in disputes. For instance, you were the one that got Lynn and Lucy to stop their roommate scuffling. Also, you got everyone to realize how petty and vicious we were to each other during the whole 'Sharon DeMonet' episode. So with that being said, I'd say there's no reason why we can't find some sort of middle ground for when it's okay to get involved in each other's problems. That could potentially put this issue to bed once and for all. And maybe once we put it to bed, we can tuck it in, too! Get it?"
In a rare moment, a small amount of laughter was being shared between the three of them over Luan's pun. Shortly after such laughter subsided, Lincoln was feeling better overall regarding everything as a result of the assurances from his sisters and particularly from the suggestion of a middle ground for dispute resolution. What also likely helped was the joint hug that Luna and Luan had now encircled him in, giving Lincoln that nice, fulfilling sensation within him of being given the chance of having such a meaningful talk to clear things up.
The moment being shared between them would end up being cut short though, when they heard a faint noise that sounded an awful lot like a sneeze.
"Did you guys hear that?" Lincoln asked.
Realizing the sound had come from just beyond his bedroom door, Lincoln hopped off his bed and went to investigate. He opened up the door and was surprised to see all his other sisters standing before him. Confirming the suspicion that the sound was a sneeze was when Lily, who was being cradled in Lori's arms, would end up revealing to be the origin of it by sneezing again.
"Dang it..." The rest of the sisters standing in the doorway said, having been caught apparently listening in.
"What you all doing here?" Lincoln asked them.
"Oh, uh...we...all had to go to the bathroom..." Lynn tried explaining.
"At the same time!" Lana interjected.
"Plus Lily needed a diaper change..." Lori added.
"And maybe we couldn't help but overhear some of what was being said at the end..." Lola finished off with nervously.
Leni looked on confusedly, "Really? I thought we were all here because we all started feeling sorry for Lincoln as well and wanted to know what Luna and Luan were going to talk to him about, so we chose come on up and listen in on everything."
A mix of groans, kvetching and forehead slapping ensued from everyone surrounding Leni as soon as she let loose that little factoid.
"Sigh. Okay, fine, that's the actual reason why we're here." Lucy admitted.
"Now make way, little bro, we're coming in and getting in on the talking as well." Lynn said assertively.
Heeding Lynn's words, Lincoln back away and allowed everyone else to crowd inside his room.
"So, you guys also want to talk about this, too?" He asked.
"Well, from the sounds of it, Luna and Luan did a pretty good job themselves and said a number of things we agree with." Lori answered with a light grin coming across her face.
"Yeah, and I think we all can admit that pushing you out isn't such a good idea, Lincoln" Leni added, "Plus, it's kind of mean when you think about it."
"And I think we could've stood to have done a better job of explaining the sister fight protocol to you beforehand, as opposed to just dropping it on you straightaway right as Lori and Leni here began fighting, then basically inconveniencing your daily routine once things started really getting out of hand." Lynn said.
Lisa nodded, "Agreed. Thought it is now established fact that your recent interference in our petty squabbles unnecessarily escalated things to unpleasantly volatile level as you have now fully admitted to, severance of any assistance of yours is too unrealistic of a prospect, nor was it a serious suggestion as Luna and Luan have already explained. Therefore, I think I can speak for everyone else in wholeheartedly endorsing this middle ground proposal that Luan has so generously introduced."
Following Lisa's own endorsement, everyone did in fact verbalize various statements in the affirmative as well. Those positive remarks ended up actually taking Luan by surprise.
"Aw, well, thanks for the approval, you guys." She said while smiling, "I admit I only really said that mostly to make Lincoln feel better, but if you're all serious about it, then let's go for it!"
With that, all of the siblings cheered in support of such a new manner of establishing grounds for solving various inter-sibling conflicts.
"You know, if you ask me, this should have some sort of name to go along with it." Lynn suggested.
"Yeah, I like that idea." Lori agreed, "But what should it be called?"
For a moment, everyone pondered as to what this exactly this new methodology could be referred to as such. It didn't take long though for one to have such an idea.
"I've got it!" Lincoln declared, "How about we call it our 'meddle protocol'?"
It took a moment to sink in, but all of his sisters appeared to approve of Lincoln's creative choice of phrasing.
"Hey, I think I can dig that title, bro." Luna said, giving him a supportive pat on the shoulder.
"Yeah, me too!" Luan added, "In fact, I'm so in favor of it, you could call it a pro-tocol!"
Unlike her previous pun, this one wasn't quite as well received. Nevertheless, the name appeared to be settled on.
"Well, since we seem to agree on that, I suggest what we do next is that maybe later on, we can all gather in me and Leni's room for a meeting to discuss the terms for everything." Lori said, "How does that sound?"
"Sure, that sounds like a plan." Lincoln replied, "That is, if everyone else agrees."
A mixture of "yeahs" and "yeas" showed that the rest of the siblings did agree to the plan.
"We should also run this idea through Mom and Dad, too." Lincoln added.
"I can concur with that. Our parental units would be most satisfied with this solution of ours. We should inform them of this posthaste." Lisa remarked.
Soon after, everybody began departing from Lincoln's room to explain everything to their parents, except for Luna, Luan and Lincoln, who were still sitting on Lincoln's bed while he rejoined both his sisters there.
"Wow, so that takes care of that." Lincoln said happily, "Also, thank you guys for coming up and talking things over with me. It means a lot that we got to clear everything up."
Luna grinned and ruffled his hair, "The pleasure's all ours, little bro. But if you ask me, most of the credit should go over here to Luan. If she never took that first step in choosing to come up and talk to you, none of this would have been possible. I really only came along for the ride and to give Luan some moral support, but I suppose I did my own part as well."
Lincoln smiled from ear to ear as he turned to face Luan, who was bashfully rubbing the back of her neck, though she did ultimately appreciate Luna crediting her for all that happened thus far.
"Well, if that's the case..." Lincoln began to say.
He enthusiastically flung his arms around his fourth oldest sister, which she was more than happy to give back on her end.
"I take it this means you really appreciate what I did, huh, Linc?" Luan asked with a chuckle.
Lincoln didn't respond with words, but he did nod his head while he had it resting up against Luan's shoulder. Even without anything being spoken from her brother, the loving and appreciative sentiment was being sent loud and clear.
"Glad I could be of assistance." Luan said to him, "And since you did mention it a little earlier, maybe it'd be right for me and Luna to apologize for threatening to beat you up just because you tried to step in with regards to our fight. At the most, we should've simply told you to stay out, not dangling the outright use of violence to keep you away. No matter the issue dividing any one of us, physical fighting shouldn't be a go to choice against each other or anyone, if it should even be a choice at all."
Nodding in agreement with Luan's apology to their brother and the overall sentiment of the latter statement, and not one to miss out on the sharing of affection, Luna came on over closer and joined in to form another group hug among them. Safe to say, no matter what future terms they and the rest of the siblings come up with in there newly formed protocol, hugs and other similar forms of affection are the kind of meddling they could always stand to have in their lives.
"Hey, aren't you guys coming along?" Lana inquired to her three older siblings from the stairway.
"Yeah, what's the holdup?" Lola added.
"On our way, little dudettes!" Luna answered.
"Wait, come again?"
"You're getting rid of the sister fight protocol?!"
The news their kids were informing them of made Rita and Lynn Sr. positively confounded.
"Well, not...really. We're taking elements of it, getting rid of the bad stuff and melding it with some new things to create a whole new protocol to help solve disputes and problems between us!" Luan clarified with zeal.
"But we will admit that when you get right down to it, a 'sister' fight protocol doesn't really work out when we might give the impression it's all about kicking our only bro to the curb instead of actually settling our issues." Luna added, patting said bro on the back.
"So with that being said, we wanted to tell you this new idea of ours before we really get to working out the details." Lincoln rounded out saying, "What do you think?"
For a moment, the parents gave everything some consideration, then seemingly gave their approval based on the proud smiles on their faces.
"I'd say good on you for coming up with something like this, kids." Rita said.
"Yeah, you really proved us wrong here." Lynn Sr. followed up with.
"Huh? Wait, what now?" Lucy wondered.
"'Proved you wrong'?" Lola impetuously asked, "What do you mean, Daddy?"
"Yeah, are you saying that you didn't trust us?" Lana added.
"Well, if your mother and I are being honest, due to recent events we were starting to have our doubts if you kids can actually solve disputes on your own." Lynn Sr. admitted after sighing.
"And it's not just with the sister fight protocol, though it hardly helped. Remember the time you all went on strike after refusing to do your chores and the house started filling up with garbage, including when a certain someone thought it was a good idea to make a monster out of it?" Rita said, shooting a look at her second youngest daughter.
Lisa rolled her eyes and scoffed, "Firstly, Mother, Trashy came out of fortuity, not out of choice. Secondly, such calamity wouldn't have occurred in the first place had Lincoln not so petulantly complained about our assigned chores and..."
"Lisa..." Rita admonished the genius, "Lincoln did have his part, but he wasn't the only one responsible for that whole incident, am I right, girls?"
"Yeah..." The girls collectively responded sadly, minus Lisa, who had her own piece to say.
"I concede. Apologies, Mother." Lisa said with a sigh, "If memory serves me correctly, I was solely responsible for the cutting off of our residential electrical and water supplies during said incident, so who am I to assign fault to a singular familial unit?"
"That's right, and the reason I bring that instance up is because while I insisted to your father at the time that you kids will eventually solve that crisis on your own, which you ultimately did, looking back in hindsight, we should have stepped in at some point." Rita admitted, "We feel like that we failed you in a sense for not doing so sooner."
Lynn Sr. nodded in agreement, "And going back to the sister fight protocol, each time we try to leave any combination of you girls alone whenever you get in a fight, even up to and including running off to our room, it's like we're committing a dereliction of our role as parents. What does it say about your mother and I when we're too scared to intervene and cower away to our bedroom once any of you start fighting?"
"Well, I don't think that's really all your fault whenever you do that..." Leni said guiltily.
"Yeah, we can be a pretty scary bunch." Lynn Jr. expressed unabashedly, getting chuckles from everyone, "But that doesn't mean it should be like that all the time. Parents shouldn't be scared to get involved with their kids if they're getting into uncontrollable rumbles. Preventing that kind of stuff from happening in the first place is one of your responsibilities, and ours, too, really. And yeah, we're sorry that we did put that much fear into you."
"And that's exactly why we're coming up with this new system that we hope will literally be better than what came before and you two will definitely be a key part of it, Mom and Dad." Lori concluded with.
With everything taken into account, the patriarch and matriarch of the Loud family again smiled at their kids.
"Well, as your mother said earlier, good on you!" Lynn Sr. said.
"We're both so proud of you kids and we can't wait to see what you'll come up with." Rita added.
"Us too!" Lincoln expressed brimming with hope, "We won't let you down."
"Yeah!" The sisters shouted together in unity with their brother.
In hours since announcing what was informally dubbed the "meddle protocol", the Loud siblings had come to an agreement on what constituted the parameters for it. However, verbal agreements alone weren't going to cut it. To show just how serious everyone was about this, they drew up a written accord in which each of them would become a signatory to so that they would be bound to its standards.
Just shortly before dinnertime, the siblings presented the accord to their parents for them to look over. Both were extremely proud of the lengths their kids went in putting this together and they became the first official signers to this reformed protocol.
Once dinner had come and gone, the next step was for the siblings to convene at Lori and Leni's room to finalize everything by having everyone signing on individually. Before that would occur, though, Lincoln would conduct a readout of the accord and it's provisions.
"Okay, guys, the Loud Family Meddle Protocol is as follows…
First and foremost, no physical violence, period, no exceptions. Short of a complete and utterly treacherous, unforgivable betrayal of the family, no dispute can ever be bad enough to lead to any of us coming to blows, which will only lead to further strains in whomever is involved and may have the unintended consequences of dragging any other siblings into scuffles themselves. So again, violence is strictly looked down upon, if not outright forbidden.
Also as an addendum, do not threaten anyone with a beating if someone tries to intervene in a dispute. Admonishing them to not get involved is one thing, but violence isn't and is never an acceptable means of deterrence. This shall be henceforth known as the Rocker Jester Non-Aggression Principle.
Second, if the dispute among any pair of siblings is so incredibly small and petty, then it is likely best to leave both parties alone and see if they can solve things on their own. This shall be known as the Dress Code.
Third, if a dispute between siblings is not solved right away for an extended period of time and/or is serious enough to the point that tensions are brimming and a physical struggle is possible, then it is the right of any nearby siblings to separate and keep them in different rooms away from each other until tempers have cooled down and they are ready to talk things over. If need be, at least one sibling can be there to mediate things as well when such a talk happens.
As another addendum, when said siblings are put in separate rooms, we will try our hardest not to impede on the daily lives of others when doing so and not allow certain rooms such as the bathroom or larger commonly used communal rooms like the kitchen and living room to be used a cooling down location. Such recommend places for cooling down can include the front yard, the backyard, the attic, the basement, the garage and even inside Vanzilla if available. Additionally, we will also never barge in and kick anyone out of their own bedrooms in order to provide space for any disputants. Permission will be explicitly asked and needed before such action can be taken. This shall henceforth be called the Lincoln Loud Clause.
Forth, above all else, should any disputes still not be resolved, Mom and Dad have full authority to step in and their word is absolutely final.
Finally, this protocol is open to future amendments, which must first be discussed between all of us and then brought up to Mom and Dad before being added on."
Ten signatures later, plus one indistinct squiggly line from Lily, and everything was almost made official, but not before Lori came up to the podium.
"All right, guys, I know we all just now literally sighed on to this, but it is fair to ask if anyone has any questions or objections. Anybody?" She asked.
No one said anything, only shaking their heads "no" while smiling.
"Well, with that being said, I hearby declare that the Loud Family Meddle Protocol to be officially put into effect!" Lori said emphatically, slamming down one of her shoes like a gavel.
With that, a cacophony of celebratory cheering coursed out of the siblings. In the aftermath of such jubilation, Lincoln came up next to Lori and wanted to say another piece of his.
"I'm proud of you guys. See what we can accomplish when we put our combined efforts together to resolve our issues without out of control hostility? Speaking of which, and maybe this is already getting tiresome to you, but I want to use this forum to again apologize for my end of things. I'd like to think the majority of fault for the chaos of these past two days and this morning lays on my shoulders." He said, rubbing the back of his head and neck.
Lori patted her brother's shoulder, "There may literally be some truth to that, but every conflict does have two sides and we can admit again on our end that some of that conflict could have been mitigated had there been a clearer explanation of the now late sister fight protocol and if we weren't so zealous about pushing you aside so fervently. So on behalf on everyone else here, we're sorry for our part, too, Lincoln."
"I think the boss man's got it right, bro." Luna chimed in, "Sure, no one's gonna argue that you roiled up the temperature in the joint with your interference, but we'll once again fess up on our end to heating things up a lot, too. But hey, we'll also give credit where it's due for you coming up with this rad new standard of fixin' any future disruptions of the peace."
"Well, that's nice of you to say, Luna, but like you said earlier to me, I'd say the most of the credit maybe goes to Luan." Lincoln said, gesturing over to his comedienne sister, "You came up with the initial idea for a newer, more balanced protocol and we'll have to see how it plays out, but I'm getting a sense that it'll work better in handling things from here on out."
Before Luan could give her own response to his kind words, Lincoln came up to her and hugged her in thanks. She chose to forgo a verbal response and instead welcomed her brother into her arms. Eventually, perhaps as to be expected but nevertheless heartwarming, the rest of the sisters joined for a symmetrical group hug.
Ultimately, what can be gleamed from these past few days for the Loud siblings is that constant interference in each other's affairs isn't most advisable, but a vaguely stated protocol that, while maybe not intended to do so, gave the impression that keeping the only brother of those siblings out of the loop was the primary goal hardly helped, either. Now the hope was that their new protocol could manage future arguments, disputes and the like more smoothly and with much less violence and volatility. Sure, the idea wasn't that fights wouldn't spring up again at all, which is far from the true goal and a household of eleven kids isn't always going to be one hundred percent harmonious, but having standards that put incentives for peaceable resolutions as opposed to physical confrontations and arbitrarily isolating or keep others in the dark of what such standards are made for an overall better situation.
But perhaps what's most important is that every time such fights do occur, each of the siblings' bonds comes out stronger in the end and it proves how tight those relationships shared among them really are.
And that is another one down the pike. As mentioned earlier, I have some parting thoughts.
A lot of people will tend to put blame on only one side or the other for the madness that was "Brawl in the Family", with the majority placing blame on the sisters and a smaller group on Lincoln, but I'd say that's a little too simplistic. Neither side really helped the other and that's what I tried to explore here with the end goal of them coming up with some kind of system that might work out better for everyone. Just to be perfectly clear, I did not write this to "better" the overall situation in that episode's aftermath, but only to see what could happen if the siblings tried to cool things down and work together on exploring the events before perhaps coming to a more...you could say, nuanced, solution. Oh, look at me, trying to be punny.
In addition, my original plan was to only have Luan talk with Lincoln at first and at times I thought Luna was kind of tacked on, but then I realized it allowed them to talk over about the incidents between them, since it can be argued Luna and Luan were the worst offenders when it came to how Lincoln was treated, so I think it worked out in the end.
That ought to do it, so thanks for the read and see you very, very much soon!