Chapter 4: Love

P O V: Matthew Casey

Molly's Bar 1925 W Cortland St, Chicago, IL 60622

May 18th 5:40 pm

"I promise to love you. Treasure you, Fight with you. Side by side. I promise to love you forever stand besides you, through sickness and health. Till death due us part."

"I use to think I was irreplaceable. I mean those were her words Herrmann. She made those promises. I didn't force her. After everything we went through. How could she just leave me like this?" We had dreams, plans, hopes. Where did it all go wrong? How did it all get so blown up?"

Sliding me another beer Herrmann shrugs "I don't know man, I'm sorry hey on the bright side man, beers are half price to you now Captain."

"Cheap ass." Adam Rusek comes up slapping me on my back "his wife just left him, if anyone deserves to drink free tonight it's this dude." "Tell ya what Adam since you've already consumed way too many past the limit. Your off the severing list but I'll put the rest of his tab on your account."

"Hey!"

"Sounds good dude thought so."

Chief slides besides me squeezing my shoulders a crisp nod between us lets me know he hurts for me. "It'll get easier Casey. Someday it'll hurt less, right now it's like a god damn bitch but your heart will heal." My cell flashes "Gabby?" I shake my head towards the chief as I see Sylvie's name and face flash on my cell. I wonder briefly what she wants, but I'm not ready to talk to anyone else yet. Not about Gabby not to her, she's too close to the drama.

Right now I just want to drink myself numb maybe find a hot woman and get laid. "Next round Herrmann." Chief slaps my back "Is on me for Casey." "Thanks man you don't have to." "I know Casey I want to." "Gonna get that call looks like Sylvie, hope she's feeling better, She looked pretty sick today I almost sent her home early." Chief's words haunt me as I reach for the cell just as it stops ringing.

People cheer as the game erupts some team scored I can't focus on who is playing or even what sport is on. My mind feels fussy like I'm plunging into a deep dark abyss. "I've never felt pain like this I think my heart is going to shatter Chief. Even when Hallie died I felt something besides pain. This is agonizing."

"It's raw yet Casey. Your still bleeding, think of a piece of meat when you throw it and dogs attack it." "Lovely image of my heart chief thanks." He raised his glass as I clicked mine against his. "Wanna hit the gym tomorrow?" Kevin Atwalter is besides me grabbing beers for his team. "Sounds like a plan man thanks." We bump fists I feel Kim squeeze my shoulders her softness triggers something inside of me I instantly recall Gabby's soft coca skin smelling of delicious vanilla as her arms wrapped around my naked form while we lay in bed after making love.

"Heartbreak is a bitch man, she's the daughter of that fat ass bitch who we call karma, except she's never ending. Just when we think we're healing something else comes along to break our hearts again."

"This bitch needs an antacid."

"Anyone seen Sylvie yet?" Otis comes up "Nah did she say she was coming?" "Honestly didn't see her much today she was showering than I think she fell asleep." "try calling her Otis." "copy that chief. She wasn't looking too well earlier." "I know that's why I am worried. Did either of you do her cpt before you left?" A worried look comes over his face I should be concerned about her I know that but all I see in my mind right now are the trips Gabby and I planned to take.

I can see us in Africa building schools, making love under the stars. Her touch still sends tiny goose bumps gliding up my arms, my nostrils can still smell her, my lips tingle from our last kiss, her moans still echo in my ears. We had made love only two days ago in hopes of getting her pregnant.

God what I wouldn't give to be in our bed holding my wife kissing her naked body making plans with her, hearing her laugh. Getting up I head to the bathroom all this beer is going straight to my bladder, of course, my cell rings again as I'm relieving myself. I can't get to it fast enough of course, by the time I am done and wrestle my way outside for quite the ringing has stopped.

Chief's words get to me as I press play what if she's sick and needs to get to the hospital she's too stubborn to call 911 if the guys didn't do her CPT she's probably struggling to breathe. I won't forgive myself if anything happens to her. Even though I don't want to talk about Gabby, I press play to see what she said.

Her voice breaks as it comes out she sounds so lost, hurt scared and devastated, her words are what stop me cold though. She's saying goodbye, why is she saying goodbye? How could this happen? I can't Drive I know him too intoxicated to see straight so I could leave on back into the bar look for anyone from 51 or district 21 who isn't completely intoxicated Kim is opposed to notice me starting like a lost boy in never, never land. "Matt?"

"Kim can you drive safe?"

"Yes, what is wrong?"

"I think Sylvie is going to hurt herself we need to get over to her apartment immediately."

"Let's go Erin, Hailey come with us." Both women look up lost but quickly follow no questions asked.

I hope we make it in time Jesus Take the Wheel.